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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    16

    Default

    dear Raibeart! (I think it is a nickname but i may be mistaken)
    thank you for your trust to our women (at least to that one special - be happy with her!).
    Yes, you are right, they do not speak foreign languages in general.
    I just wanted to ask you what do you think about those dating tours men go?
    You know, i have a feeling that everyone must have choice, eithr it is a woman from Ukraine or a man from the US. But. Women definitely do not have such a wide choice as men who go on tours where they can see the girls in real for sure. They can choose. Women sometimes get a reply to their ads and a man doesn't even attach any picture motivating it by saying that he has "no pictures" or after long correspondence sends the letter with a huge file. I personally deleted such files when they sent them to me, sorry, men, whom i could hurt. Internet is a normal thing for Ukraine already but the speed still leaves much to be desired in most of the cities...
    Travelling men are not serious sometimes. I remember one of my clients who went to Kiev to meet a man from L.A. who came to see her. He presented her a nice pendant (she hated it later), and then when they packed to change an apartment, she saw a bag filled with those pendants and he didn't look like the man who is selling them LOL. His name is Dave Staples for your information. Though ladies do not read this now, because they do not really know about this site, it is a pity though because it would help both women and men. I do not see such an agression here as on other sites, but just a heart pain.
    I wish you to be happy with your wife, keep your eyes open and learn more life in the country your wife is from. We have a rich cultural background, i am ashamed of those who scam you, nice men.
    much love and warmth to you
    Irina

    Treasure state - my sweet home!

  2. #12

    Default

    Irina,

    Raibeart is the Gaelic spelling of Robert. And it does make a good nickname.

    Personally, I would never go on a tour like what you wrote about. I need to have a person to go see and spend time with. Many, not all, of the tours are called sex tours here because that is why many men go on them.

    Men. Send a photo or photos in the first letter or two. Give her ones that show the real you. Make sure they are not over 100 k apiece. Like Irina said, the connections there are dialup and not fast at all. Mine at home is 21.6 to 28.4 kps. My only alternative is microwave or satellite. They do not usually have an alternative. I have seen 9600 bps modems in use there. For them a modem is sometimes half a months salary.

    Irina, I will be there for at least a year and probably two. And, unlike most other men, if the businesses that I am going to try and start work out, I will just come back to the USA to visit and I will live in Russia. So, I think that I will learn much about the curlture and history of the country.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    16

    Default

    Yes, Robert, it is true what you are saying. And forgive me for not recognizing your name.
    I must admit you are a very serious and brave man to have decide to move to Russia (even if you move to Moscow with all its opportunities it gives to people now). My husband wanted to be with me no matter what happened and he even said that he would move to Ukraine and this made me respect him more. But I am not so cruel and i do not want him to feel lost in the country where most of the people do not speak English and where he would not find a decent job (though who knows? no, thanks, we do not mow our lawns LOL).
    I respect you for your serious decision but i may ask you why you do not marry her there and then do the K3 visa? This is how we did though we got American marriage license first (he is from Montana and they still can use an obsolete law about proxy marriages and Texas too if i am not mistaken).
    Again accept my congratulations and respect in your decision.
    Regards,
    Irina
    P.S. Though if you are Gaelic (i do not want to sound ignorant), and it means that you are from the UK?


    Treasure state - my sweet home!

  4. #14

    Default

    Irina,

    Very good. My ancestors were from Scotland. Which think of themselves as independent of Great Britian. :-)

    Thank you for the compliments. I am a bit afraid of doing it. No one in their correct mind would not be. But, again, it is what I was asking of her. We plan on filing directly for her green card after being married for 6 months. She is delighted that I would do this for her, and so is her family. My family is another story. They are not very happy about it.

    I just hope that everything will go well and that if we return to live here, that she will be happy here also. As soo as we can, we will come here so my family can meet her and her daughter.

    I think it is a delight to have a woman's perspective on this list. Maybe it can move some of the men to looking for hope instead of standing at the wailing wall. :-)

    Robert

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    16

    Default

    Hello, robert!
    sorry for my quite late reply (we are moving to other house and my life is full of boxes LOL).
    I have already contacted some of my friends in Ukraine and I think we could do something for honest dating thing. But the problem is that I do not know too many women - many from those I knew are already married and live in different states or in Germany and Norway.
    Let me know what is your idea about it all and do you have a good database either.
    Sincerely,
    Irina

    Treasure state - my sweet home!

  6. #16

    Default

    Hummmm... and what about the married men that write to real women for months and then "disappear" without a further word to the lady or ladies that he is writing to. Rudness aside Aussie, there are scammers on both sides. I have been to Russia 6 times, Ukraine 1 time, and Lithuania 2 times. Before I got smart, I was scammed, but never for much. The worst scam was a trip I made and the type of "buy me this" scam that you talked about. But, I also limited the damage and friends of mine recovered almost everything for me by threatening her with a call to the police. From the sound of your ranting, you have no business looking for a woman any where. Until you can trust someone, you have no business in a relationship. I have been lucky in that I found a great woman and I will be moving to Russia to be with her. Yeah, she is not really interested in coming to the USA. Amazingly enough, she want to have a good husband and father for her duaghter. She wants to be loved and cared for. And, she has NEVER asked me for a penny.

  7. #17

    Default

    SOUTH AMERICAN ASKED:
    a) How does a letter from a real woman look like?
    b) What does a real woman usually talk about?
    c) What is the "normal" period of time that a woman takes to express some romantic interest in you (if she ever expresses it)?
    d) Do real women ever say they want to meet you or that they want to go to your country?

    Let me answer these questions from my own experiences and that of my friends answering a&b together followed by c&d:

    a&b) You?ll get some basic information about her and the letter will be fairly short. She?ll say she?ll answer all your questions (and if you ask her a reasonable number of appropriate questions, she'll answer them adequately). She may say that she doesn?t like to write a lot that she is interested in a face-to- face meeting. [If you can write in Russian, ask her to answer your letter in Russian: English is the premier language for scamming as it is so widely understood that the chance of roping in a sucker is highest with it.] Ask for her phone number and she?ll give you it without hesitation; if she is interested in you, she?ll want you to call her. It is never the case that a girl does not have access to a phone although the quality of the line may be poor and it may be a neighbor?s or relative?s.

    If you actually meet this woman on her home turf and she
    decides that there is merit in continuing a dialogue, she?ll write
    you more frequently and will tell you about how her day went,
    how she celebrated a holiday, etc.

    A real woman does NOT:

    Write in flowery English about love and write stanzas about love

    Go on ad nauseum about nonsense like how she ?loves life?

    Express eternal devotion without ever having met you

    Ask for money before you start having a relationship with her
    (unless it is specifically connected with meeting you eg train fare
    or air fare from a provincial city and you are meeting in the capital; the amount in question should be small meaning 50$
    and probably much less)

    c&d)Most woman will not express any romantic interest in you before a meeting between the two of you. A very few woman might try
    to coax you into visiting her by making some kind of very mild
    amorous reference. ?I hug you strongly? (Sorry this really
    sounds dumb in English). Even after you meet and, if luck would
    have it, you share some intimate moments, this reticence about
    expression of romantic interest doesn?t greatly change.

    Expectations do, however. After 2-3 trips to her country, she?ll
    expect an invitation to visit you in your country after which, if not before, she?ll expect an offer of marriage. The real Russian
    woman is serious and if you don?t ask for and deliver, within a
    reasonable amount of time, marriage she?ll disappear and refuse
    to answer your emails. If not, it?s a danger signal indicating an
    ulterior motive for perpetuating the connection.

    Concerning Ray's observations, I have two comments: Is he more interested in baiting scammers or in finding his second half? If a man is suspicious about a woman, it might be more profitable just to cut her off and focus on those ladies that at least appear genuine.

    Is Ray's experience a case of "garbage-in, garbage-out?" What websites does he tap into only to find such a high ratio of scammers and likely scammers to overall women? One such source that can prove to be a well-spring of scamming and rip-offs is www.absoluteagency.com which has very few (for want of a better term) sincere women in my experience. I'd like to know those sites that he is using if only so I can avoid them.

    I look forward to hearing your reply, Ray.

    Richard


  8. #18
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Posts
    56

    Default

    Hi Richard
    Sorry for late reply, I haven't been around for a while. I gave up on Agencies. I Absolutely gave up on one leading Agency a long time ago - it's a totally waste of time GUYS, ABSOLUTELY FORGET IT. They know it is used by most scammers and they don't care.

    I tried Merry Dating - Much less scammers there, but its now got very popular and I've been doing a bit of Scam Hunting and got a new one coming on the site, plus one old one. Yes, I'm out to get Scammers, but I don't waste a lot of my time on it now - I'm out to protect innocent guys BUT I JUST CANT BELIEVE HOW DUMB SO MANY MEN ARE - DON'T WRITE TO A SEXY PHOTO - THEY ARE 99% FAKERS - and those guys have no chance of getting laid if that what they're primarily after.

    If guys want to move quicker, propose "shall I come to you", or "you come to me" Likely is that a scammer will say "I come to you". It saves you going and entertaining her at your cost and getting scammed later - but you've been scammed anyway. Better to go on a dating or tour.

    As for me - I've given up through Internet, since July. I tried the real thing and went to a real dating Agency in the EEC and met someone real within an hour - I met a fab blonde, we clicked, she never asked for money. I was a very happy man. Then she left me, but we met again. There's a chance she'll come back. It is a very nice story and I won't give up. She writes better letters now, we are going to meet again. So, my story is, if I can get my real girl back, it will be because she will see my value as a real guy, and I will have won her heart. I climb mountains, solo, and my love story is another great climb. It might turn into a classic story - just like my incredible book that will hit the shelves next year. I'll let you all know.
    Cheers

    ray

    HEY SCAMMERS, you missed a true and faithful guy who knows how to treat a woman - when you are old you still won't have a real man or real love, you will have money but you'll die lonely.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Posts
    56

    Default

    She left the Agency, stating she'd met an American, but she denied it in e-mail and agreed to meet me again. No news, all's quiet. She may have killed herself, she was a girl who left home at 16 got a kid at 18 and tried to kill herself twice. I was the first decent man she met. I have no way to trace her because they moved.



    ray

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Posts
    56

    Default

    REAL LETTERS:
    For all the equiries above. I've a meet this weekend in Ukraine. Just a huge difference with this girl's letters. So flaming normal. Problem is, I ain't going to marry anyone - just too much legal protection exists in Europe - In cases of divorce, the women get the lot if you so much as sneeze. She can make the choice of a better life - it is not a sin to live together. She's got the daughter I'm looking for as a family, but I'm not leaving my life's work open to divorce.

    ray

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