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Thread: regarding legit women from FSU..
01-04-2005, 10:44 PM #11Junior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2004
I corresponded with a girl from Tomsk for several mos. last year. We wrote many letters and talked over phone many times. I talked to her family and her 12 yr. old son. We decided for us to meet and she came over on a Visiter's Visa. The U.S. Embassy would not grant her son to come because this way she would be sure to return to Russia if he stayed there. Once she arrived, the first wk was great. Then she became a mean, wildcat and we argued every day. Several times I left my own house to get away from her. She drank alot. ( I don't drink at all ). Her visa was posed to be only 30 dys. but when when we talked to immigration, the customs in N.Y. stamped her papers for 6 mos, so she could legally stay. A couple mos. went by and when I returned from work she was so drunk and started an argument, I'd had enough and tried to leave. After being bitten, scratched, and kicked through a glass door, I finally made it out. ( Yes, guys, I was whipped by a female ) I have never raised a hand to a female, so this was no exception. The next day she was gone and I have'nt seen her since. She's here illegally, but she's out of my life. My question is, why would a mother leave her 12 yr. old son half way around the world? But I did learn that if you break through the ruggedness,mean,stonewall exterior, you will find a very tender,caring,sensitive, interior. You just have to get past the shell.
01-05-2005, 08:56 AM #12Junior Member
- Join Date
- May 2004
I offer the following thoughts after reading the entries in this forum:
Perhaps we are verging on stereotyping discussing the "legit woman." There are as many motivations as there are woman and this speaks to the necessity of "playing the field" until these various motivations become clear. Alas, sometimes we get conned only finding out through (in the extreme case)living together the true colors that we are dealing with. I must admit that I love the term "novelty women" -- I think it is an apt terminology for those ladies dating superficially for short term gain as opposed to "gold-diggers" who are seeking a marriage they can cash in on.
If you have a mobile operating on the gsm network it is convenient for sending short messages back and forth and very cheap for the lady. I think that we have been exaggerating the extent of poverty in certain locales in the ex-USSR to the extent that it is fairly common for ladies to have mobiles. Much fewer have PCs at home although some more have access to a PC through there work. I find staying in touch by sms a good option. Who has the time to be writing long messages by email every day?
I don't think there is any magic formula for a mate. It reminds me of this Syrian formula in which you halve the man's age and add seven years to get the "ideal" wife's age. Personally, I have met a lot of girls that are fairly to very serious in the 21-25 age range although I tend to avoid students as they really are bound to their books until graduation.
It's really helpful to have some staying capacity -- I mean to be able to live in the country of the lady in question for 8-12 weeks or more per year in multiple visits over 2-3 years rather than just blowing in and out for a couple of quick visits. Then you can get a better perspective and judiciously weigh your options; nonetheless, be prepared to weather some mistakes along the way.
If you go the option of buying email addresses, it is prudent to purchase from a site that has a money-back guarantee for defective or expired email addresses
but I like to have the mailing address and phone number also as part of the deal. I think that the more contact details provided, the less chance of a scam and I personally won't go for purchasing an address of any kind without the surname.
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