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  1. #51
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    Oct 2005
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    quote:Originally posted by ham

    quote:With the exception of a couple of guys (me included) they all seem to be owned by eg.
    it depends what you mean by "owned".
    Example:Ham, get a life.!!
    Racist ?, Ok why Have i had 2 asian girl friends !!
    I am not against gay Marriages. Elton John jokes about being Gay. Maybe you should too. Plus It's not racist it's called sexistism!!
    I had friends in the past who are gay, male and female so keep your comments to your self. !!!
    Plus Don't swear at me !!
    Why do some people get so worked up on here. ??
    If that's what someone want's then it's there choice. Don't Flame people for having Opinions . !!
    I'll be friends with anyone but not people like you who are so small minded like you. !!
    If I am bothered about age difference then that is my choice, again don't flame people for having an Opinion.


    A man's mind, streched by a new idea, will never re-gain it's original dimension.

  2. #52
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    Sep 2005
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    Hi everybody, and hi ScamMagnet? It has been a while since the last time we crossed out swords. Cheers to you, I hope you and everyone else had a great time greeting 2006.

    I read all your posts from the last 2 days, and I have a few comments on those subjects of course, but before that I would like to let everyone know that I will be adjusting my schedule to fit my plans for this new year, and as a result I will have to cut my time for web entertainment (like engaging into endless philosophical and otherwise arguments) by a good percentage. So, I will be coming in only once or twice a day, for 30-40 minutes or so. So please do not think that the discussion bored me, or that I am ignoring posts. I will comment as much as my time will allow me.

    Happy New Year to all.

  3. #53
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    Sep 2005
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    quote:Originally posted by scam magnet

    Elenag,I can't believe this is a topic you can up with- about being polite. What a JOKE, you are such a phony.
    On my first post "whats the attraction" oct. 5,2005 you were the first reply calling me, "poor mike" + "angry" your 2nd reply was wise ass remarks, your 3rd reply you said i was thinking with my cock.
    I don't think I did that. I do not use profanities (except when quoting, perhaps). I said, " some people need to stop thinking with the wrong head and learn to be sceptical, and 99% of the scammers won't be of any threat to them". I didn't saY that you did [think with the wrong head], or that my comment was addressed to you.

    And I didn't say you were angry. I said you sounded to me like an angry person. Which you did, in my opinion. But yes, I was sarcastic. I apologize.

    And just so everyone knows what we are talking about, here is the thread. http://www.stop-scammers.com/forum/t...p?TOPIC_ID=372


    quote:Originally posted by scam magnet
    I not suprized to see that your still trying to be the Queen Bee on this forum, the miss know it all, judge + jury.
    I am the only woman on this forum (as far as we know). I am forced into this position.


    quote:Originally posted by scam magnet
    As i said in my post "I never went looking for a russian woman they found me on a dating site". would you call yourself a good example of what a typical russian woman is like? or did you change when you came to the U.S.
    I will not consider myself a 100% typical Russian woman. Most RW I know still do not want to marry overseas. So I am rather unusual that way among the ladies I knew back from Russia. Also, I was one of the first two or three RWs from my city to marry a foreigner, so it also makes my case unusual. As to the character and personality? I consider myself somewhat more independent-thinking and goal driven than most, but other than that I think I am rather typical.

    quote:Originally posted by scam magnet
    Did you ever scam a man before you met your husband ? Have you ever participated in a scam with anyone or watched one happen. Be honest,
    No on the first one, no on the second one, and as far as the third one... I have been maintaining a black list since 2003. What do you think, have I ever watched a scam happen? That's a silly question, I am sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. #54
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    Sep 2005
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    quote:Originally posted by ham
    well, i read any kind of studies and opinions. my take is 10-12 years are a line after which novelty, good will & "best self" games no longer play a significant role.
    Wow. That is something totally new for me. Live and learn! I will go tell my hubby. I bet he didt know that, either!




    quote:Originally posted by ham

    too bad you apply the same "ideologie du ressentiment" as they do, so it's old as you want but it works...crying foul, denouncing disrespect, blahblah.
    Khm... I sort of thought pretty much anyone who feels offended can denounce disrespect and cry foul? Or not? I am new to this culture, please enlighten.



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    quote:how about you, ham? have you ever done something in your past that now, looking back at it, you think you would do it differently?
    well, his father just bought his son's life back with the national guard slot ( he wasn't the only "big name" doing so )...that's reasonable by a human standpoint, but now this same chicken expects others to walk the walk, while he can only talk.
    That's all very good, however, what about the question I asked? If it was the answer, then I didnt quite get it...




    quote:Originally posted by ham
    from a white house bunker i can show Putin my middle finger & tell him to suck mine. I can also draw charts & win the terrorism war on paper...from a bunker. If i had to step on the carpet with Putin (#3 at russian sambo contest ), then he'd probably rip my finger off & stick it into my a$$. When planes where crashing, he "flew over there" with a bunch of cloned AF1 jets...triple chicken because the white house as a bunker to resist atomic attacks. Hitler never left Berlin and Hirohito never left Tokyo.
    So i guess you have a different idea of bravery & manhood...sure, he does know how to "play safe".
    So, you want to see Bush challenge Putin into a wrestling contest on a red carpet? And I have no idea where or why he flew "over there" with cloned jets? But you know what? never mind? the Bush thing is just not what i want to be spending my time on. But thank you for elaborating.


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    quote:Before you were saying that only two types of women choose older partners: the mishioneries and the mentally disturbed.
    i still think there must be something behind such a choice as 30 years age gap, irrespective of marriage chances etc.
    Of course there is! I personally find guys in their late 30es and up the best marriage partners. Most already been through the process and hopefully their worst marriage (and possibly parental) mistakes already have been made. They do not seem to be as self-absorbed. They seem to appreciate a good marriage partner more. Not all, of course. But the ones who do are the ones I think would make a great marriage partner.



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    Come on, if a 60yo man expressly seeks teeners, he's usually labelled a pervert or at least a person with issues.
    If he is seeking teenagers, especially pre-legal, then of course! However, a woman in her early to mid-twenties is not a teenager, is she? The instincts, I think, dictate that a younger female is a better choice of a mate because she will produce more children, and possibly healthier children. Also, I do not think that the age in itself (just the fact of age) is a 100% deciding factor. I believe that looks and attitudes are important, too. I think that if you put a fit, toned, well-groomed and energetic 35-years old next to a 280lb 22 years old dull cronically depressed girl, most men would chose the 35 years old one. But I do not know for sure. I am just guessing.




    quote:Originally posted by ham
    When i point out huge age gaps mean an increased chance of failure beyond the 40-50% we have for everyday's people, you say no and you say prove it and you say this isn't enough to prove it, etc.
    No, that's not why I said ?prove it?. You compared my arguments to the ones used by smokers to defend their harmful habits.

    We all know that there have been endless amount of researches showing the bad affects of smoking. However, there are no studies yet(to my knowledge) that would show that age difference marriages produce a very high failure rate when compared to the rest of the marriages. So, unless such study is performed, no one of us can say for sure what effect if any the age difference plays in the failure rate. So, your comparison does not hold logic. One example has studies and experiments showing the exact effects. The second example has nothing but our own guesstimations and believes. How can you say that they are the same and could be compared as equals?

    I, by the way, never said that age difference marriages are not a higher risk. In fact, on previous occasions I mentioned that I do consider them to be higher risk, but not nearly to the degree you think they are. I repeat: I think personal qualities, compatibility and moral values play much more crucial role in the success or failure of marriage, than a number of years between the spouses.



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    i doubt i could be around in 20 years.
    This forum will probably disappear much earlier as well.
    So there is my email in my profile i have since 1997...you can store it but i cannot guarantee it will still be working 20 or 10 or 5 years from now: can YOU?
    So it's not lack of interest but rather lack of certainty.
    I agree. However, you said this: ?I don't care whom you sleep with...i say: come after 15 or 20 years and let's talk. Afraid you won't be there as many because of divorce? Not my problem.?

    It was at that time that I really wanted to say, ?How can either of us know where we will be here in 15 or 20 years from now? You are asking me to come 20 years later with a proof, and you make it your best argument. It has a faulty logic in it?s very core. If I am not here in 20 years with the proof because I am dead (god forbid), or lost a link to this discussion, then would it prove you were right and I was wrong on the age difference subject??

    But, I decided that would make you cry out ?Here we have the proof! She is bending backwards over to avoid the issue!?. Would make me look bad either way.

    So, I decided that agreeing to take your challenge would be the fastest way to put those issues under your nose without bringing them up myself? and it worked, I think.




    quote:Originally posted by ham
    quote:ah... i almost started to think you have a thing about big feet.
    i hope you're joking.
    I was, I will admit it. A thought of you fantasizing about Godzilla feet was just too good to resist.

    Good night to all!

  5. #55
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    Sep 2005
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    quote:Khm... I sort of thought pretty much anyone who feels offended can denounce disrespect and cry foul?
    as others say, you can either freeze up & cry foul, or poke fun at others, depending on which serves your interests better. Those into unconventional lifesyles always do that. Good for them.

    quote:That's all very good, however, what about the question I asked? If it was the answer, then I didnt quite get it...
    you don't get a lot of things. Do you mean the time as a kid i stole an apple? Or the day i didn't take a shower? Or yelled back in anger at someone? Or crapped my pants? or sped way beyond legal limit? Or perhaps i didn't pay 100% of due taxes? Well, i'm sorry but you are light years from someone who willingly dodges conscription, [u]THENsends other to die under the same law or "national security" ghost menace he dodged. It's like the minority vicious murderer claiming some "crackers" pay no taxes, thus he didn't get his welfare cheque and that "desperation" turned him into a murderer...but whatever floats your boat.

    quote:And I have no idea where or why he flew "over there" with cloned jets?
    September 11 he flew away fearing for his life (this gets old) despite the white house has antiatomic bunkers; because he feared even more, there was not one, but a few airplanes identical to his flying at the same time, to probably fool some muslim topgun death squad.

    quote:If he is seeking teenagers, especially pre-legal, then of course! However, a woman in her early to mid-twenties is not a teenager, is she? The instincts, I think, dictate that a younger female is a better choice of a mate because she will produce more children, and possibly healthier children. Also, I do not think that the age in itself (just the fact of age) is a 100% deciding factor. I believe that looks and attitudes are important, too.
    nice pseudo-scientific explanation of why old men like arm candy half their age.
    Most of them are divorced already and often with children, so i don't think they are chasing tail for the sake of a strong progeny as the main reason.
    in your other post you said you were 19-20, not 25.
    They like hot a$$; they're no mormons.
    "Just the age", no.
    "300 pounds depressed etc ", no.
    But we all know oldies screen women closer to their age out of the picture immediately, same as they bin the profile of the 18yo fat, ugly girl.
    They never get to evaluate the 35yo good-looking woman because in the search engine the age gap is set 18-22.
    If i don't like smokers, i screen them out first...including the wonderful, pretty woman whose only fault is to smoke.

    quote:It was at that time that I really wanted to say, ?How can either of us know where we will be here in 15 or 20 years from now? You are asking me to come 20 years later with a proof, and you make it your best argument. It has a faulty logic in it?s very core. If I am not here in 20 years with the proof because I am dead (god forbid), or lost a link to this discussion, then would it prove you were right and I was wrong on the age difference subject??

    But, I decided that would make you cry out ?Here we have the proof! She is bending backwards over to avoid the issue!?. Would make me look bad either way.

    So, I decided that agreeing to take your challenge would be the fastest way to put those issues under your nose without bringing them up myself? and it worked, I think.
    the issue is: you have to prove nothing [u]TO ME.
    Even if i die tomorrow, your relationship won't stand higher chances.
    I simply say i read about countless such cases, then gone sour.
    Come on!
    Your man is not the first man loving attractive females half his age...or is he?
    And you're not the first to work a deal out of such appetite.
    I say you'll not be alone when the dust settles and you divorce.
    And yes, you'll realize you probably love cooking & going to church but it's not enough.



  6. #56
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    Sep 2005
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    quote:Originally posted by ham

    quote:Khm... I sort of thought pretty much anyone who feels offended can denounce disrespect and cry foul?
    as others say, you can either freeze up & cry foul, or poke fun at others, depending on which serves your interests better. Those into unconventional lifesyles always do that. Good for them.
    Ok, let me get this straight.. Those [persons] into ?unconventional lifestyles? (and I assume being a black minority means having an ?unconventional lifestyle??) will ?either freeze up & cry foul, or poke fun at others? when feel insulted. But those into ?conventional? lifestyles do something completely different? Again, please enlighten.




    quote:Originally posted by ham
    you don't get a lot of things. Do you mean the time as a kid i stole an apple? Or the day i didn't take a shower? Or yelled back in anger at someone? Or crapped my pants? or sped way beyond legal limit? Or perhaps i didn't pay 100% of due taxes?
    Yes. Many of those things. I am not talking about you pooping your pants when being an infant, of course, but for example not paying due taxes or speeding up beyond limit (and putting innocent drivers at danger).

    See, we all do things that perhaps shouldn?t have been done. Or could have done differently. Why don?t we start criticizing ourselves first, and THEN go after other people?s misdoings or weaknesses? Or is it too laborious and not nearly as much fun? So, you stole an apple when your were 5, for example? Should everyone brand you as a thief from that point forward? Should we remind you about it every time you open your mouth? ?Hey, why do you listen to him? He steals apples!?, or ?Hey, don?t come near my table at a restaurant. You stole an apple 35 years ago, you will probably try to steal my sandwich off the plate!?

    So you stole an apple when 5 (well, at least that?s our example), yet you are probably not a thief now. How do you explain this?

    Now if G. Bush would steal an apple as a kid and it would come out, imagine how much dirt you would be able to throw at him for the apple incident? A lot (though I am only guessing). Or if he didn?t pay due taxes? You would have a field day with that one!

    Somehow bad things that we do seem to be a kind of ok with us, but what others do ? that?s a completely different story! They are chicken, thieves and morons, right?

    Now, apples and pooping pants aside. I bet you have just as many skeletons in the closet as most of us, mortals. So why do you take so much pleasure in throwing stones at others?



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    nice pseudo-scientific explanation of why old men like arm candy half their age.
    Not just old men. Most men.

    Most men (well, as far as I can tell, of course) seem to have attraction to ladies between, say, 16 and 30. Coincidently, I was lead to believe that that age is the best for childbirth for women. Not all man plan to have children with those young woman, but I think the most obvious reason(s) for such unconscious attractions can be identified. Of course, not all men date women of those ages. Some because of the society and its restrictions, some because they are already married, etc, some just feel that it is ?wrong?. Many reasons why not to date, everyone has his own probably. But does it mean that they do not feel the attraction? What do you think? Do you feel more physical attraction to a 20 years old than to women of older age? Or do you not find younger women any more attractive than older women? How does it work in the male brain?



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    in your other post you said you were 19-20, not 25.
    They like hot a$$; they're no mormons.
    I was. I was 19 and then turned 20 during the first year my husband and I met.


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    "Just the age", no.
    "300 pounds depressed etc ", no.
    But we all know oldies screen women closer to their age out of the picture immediately, same as they bin the profile of the 18yo fat, ugly girl.
    They never get to evaluate the 35yo good-looking woman because in the search engine the age gap is set 18-22.
    Well, now we got to the Internet dating that complicates things. Before we go there, try to take my example and apply it to a real life (not online dating) situation. IMAGINE than a, say, 40 years old man is introduced (in person) to 2 ladies: the energetic, fun and in great physical shape 35 years old and the 270 lb 25 years old with negative personality. Whom, do you think, most men would choose? If it was just the age that matters, then they would choose the 25 years old. Again, I would be curious to know how it looks like through the male?s eyes.




    quote:Originally posted by ham
    the issue is: you have to prove nothing [u]TO ME.
    Even if i die tomorrow, your relationship won't stand higher chances.
    That remains to be seen. However, I have been pretty happy for 5+ years. Most girls I know couldn?t make it through 2-3 years of marriage (with their same age husbands I might add). So, as far as I am concerned, I already beat their odds and then some. So I think my husband and I already done good. Regardless of the final outcome, we are happy now. I will take my ?happy now and here? over ?I am afraid to be unhappy sometime in the future?. It may sound silly to you, but that?s my way.

    And also I am not going to measure myself against some abstract ideas, or strive for movie-perfect relationship. Better than average is good enough for me. So I am going to measure myself against people I personally know. And so far, as I said, I think I have done ok.



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    I simply say i read about countless such cases, then gone sour.
    Hm.. countless you say? How much exactly is ?countless? to you? Over 100 billions? Or over 1 billion? Or over 1 million? Or over 500,000? Or over 10,000? Or over 1,000? Or over 500? Or over 50? Or over 25? Or ten?

    I think you can say ?countless? when it is getting hard to count. When it is below, let?s say, 100,000, I think it is not countless yet. Or do you say ?countless? when you do not know how many but think that it is a lot?.

    So, the point is, can you give me the closest estimation of how many ?such marriages? you have seen, first in person and then what you have seen through other means (met online, heard of, read of, etc)? I am curious to find out how many ?such marriages? you were able to analyze and how closely. Just answer the question directly, I don?t ask for anything else but a plain estimation of numbers right now.



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    Come on!
    Your man is not the first man loving attractive females half his age...or is he?
    Probably not. As far as I can tell, most men are. Do you disagree?



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    And you're not the first to work a deal out of such appetite.
    What deal? That I take care of his needs (cook, clean, do whatever errands or things need to be done, support him, be his lover, friend and partner, perhaps have a child, etc), and he takes care of mine (provides, protects, and be my lover, friend and my partner)? That?s the ?deal?? How is it different from what most people want from a marriage?

    And I see you didn?t comment on my statement about what I think makes older guys more attractive as marriage partners. Why? That was a big question from the very beginning for you. You said, that you can?t see a legitimate reason for a lady to marry an older guy. So, your logical conclusion was that only gold-diggers and mentally disturbed will go for such a marriage. And I objected, and that?s how this whole discussion happened. So, what do you think of my reasons?

    Also you didn?t comment on my speech on the comparison between the smokers? arguments and my arguments that you like so much. So, how can you compare those two? I asked you. If one example has plenty of well-conducted research to prove their thing, and another has only what each one of us think of it. CAN you compare the two? Please, give me your opinion.

  7. #57
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    quote:Ok, let me get this straight.. Those [persons] into ?unconventional lifestyles? (and I assume being a black minority means having an ?unconventional lifestyle??) will ?either freeze up & cry foul, or poke fun at others? when feel insulted. But those into ?conventional? lifestyles do something completely different? Again, please enlighten.
    You are not Jacques Derrida. Stop playing one. Well, so you say that minority people AND people into unconventional lifestyles do not cry foul every time they can AND pose as "mortally offended" as a way to divert attention from the main topic? If you say so...

    quote:Now, apples and pooping pants aside. I bet you have just as many skeletons in the closet as most of us, mortals. So why do you take so much pleasure in throwing stones at others?
    i am not a coward. i never dodged anything. i never sent anyone dying. i don't claim i want to invade another country because god told me so. i never flew up there while my country was under attack. So if that is the same as tax avoidance for you, then ok. You're mixing apples & dog's sh!t, but whatever.

    quote:Most men (well, as far as I can tell, of course) seem to have attraction to ladies between, say, 16 and 30. Coincidently, I was lead to believe that that age is the best for childbirth for women. Not all man plan to have children with those young woman, but I think the most obvious reason(s) for such unconscious attractions can be identified. Of course, not all men date women of those ages. Some because of the society and its restrictions, some because they are already married, etc, some just feel that it is ?wrong?. Many reasons why not to date, everyone has his own probably. But does it mean that they do not feel the attraction? What do you think? Do you feel more physical attraction to a 20 years old than to women of older age? Or do you not find younger women any more attractive than older women? How does it work in the male brain?
    this would be perfect for an agency website.
    well, everybody loves fresh meat. Period.
    Then men got brains, not only balls.
    Balls tell me to a$$ rape her in the back alley.
    Brains tell me that i have nothing in common with her; that she's probably out of my league and that her only (or prominent) interest in dealing with me would be because i could provide her with a better lifestyle, more money or whatever.
    Such is not the most promising starting point for any relationship.
    That will require more & more money thrown at the problem, until either she gets bored or my wallet empties.

    quote:Well, now we got to the Internet dating that complicates things. Before we go there, try to take my example and apply it to a real life (not online dating) situation. IMAGINE than a, say, 40 years old man is introduced (in person) to 2 ladies: the energetic, fun and in great physical shape 35 years old and the 270 lb 25 years old with negative personality. Whom, do you think, most men would choose? If it was just the age that matters, then they would choose the 25 years old. Again, I would be curious to know how it looks like through the male?s eyes.
    i already told you that.
    Given two women with very similar features (EG say blond/blue eyes, square jaw, this tall, this breast size ), yet one is 40 in great physical shape AND the other is 19 but weighs 180kg, has bad acne etc etc, THEN of course men will choose the 40yo. Men are not idiots.
    As i said, both the ugly young and the older ones are screened OUT of the picture at the beginning. There may be 2 equally similar & in equally good shape women, but one is 18 and another is 26...who do you think the man (especially old) would choose? He has 35 browser windows open now, with 35 profiles. He just closes the ones he thinks are second or third best, including the 26yo. But you have been there & know better i suppose.

    quote:Hm.. countless you say? How much exactly is ?countless? to you? Over 100 billions? Or over 1 billion? Or over 1 million? Or over 500,000? Or over 10,000? Or over 1,000? Or over 500? Or over 50? Or over 25? Or ten?
    poor job.
    You have no thousands over thousands of such "unconventional" marriages.
    Therefore the failure rate (increasing from the average 40-50% ) will start from there.
    A wild guess (knowing such unconventional relationships stand much higher risk than average ones; and you said they do stand higher risk ), it is not far fetched to assume if the average divorce rate is 50%, then such marriages can be at a 60-70%+ divorce rate. Assuming the age gap only affects the whole in a 10-20% ratio.
    If you're fine with that, good for you.

    quote:And I see you didn?t comment on my statement about what I think makes older guys more attractive as marriage partners. Why? That was a big question from the very beginning for you. You said, that you can?t see a legitimate reason for a lady to marry an older guy. So, your logical conclusion was that only gold-diggers and mentally disturbed will go for such a marriage. And I objected, and that?s how this whole discussion happened. So, what do you think of my reasons?
    what's the only or predominant difference between a man in his 30 and one in his 50? On average, money. That is all. About your motives, you said it all yourself.
    quote:quote:
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    I was glad to bail out of Russia. I didn't plan for it to happen that way, but it happened, and I am glad. I never said I loved my husband. I was never looking for a love in the first place. I never said my friends love their husband. I don't think they (my friends) were looking for love either. Their husbands may have been looking for love, but I think they were glad to settle in with their Russian girlfriends, love or not love. We all were looking to GET MARRIED. Start a family. Not be lonely. Have someone to share a life with.

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    quote:
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    I wanted a marriage that would last. So I decided to never marry anyone I am actually in love with.
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    and


    quote:
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    My hubby would send me money for English lessons, and some extra to make sure I can do some fun stuff (like eating pizzas, buying some clothes, going to concerts, or going to Moscow to visit my friends there from time to time), plus for the bus pass , and when I lost my access to free Internet he sent me a laptop (that he bought here and shipped to me by FedEx), he really took care of me and that is the reason why I dumped 100 other guys writing to me and decided to go serious with him. The other guys behaved like weak, indecisive, unreliable people. I said to myself, "I need a man, not a chicken. He is the only one who seems to care enough about me to take care of my needs".
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------




    quote:
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    I have been happiliy married to an American for the last 5 years. He paid for my visa, trip to Moscow (to get it), for my tickets (and even extra for some nice things to do while my last few days in Russia), and had given me probably over $1000 in monthly support for months while the paperwork was processed.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    quote:So, how can you compare those two? I asked you. If one example has plenty of well-conducted research to prove their thing, and another has only what each one of us think of it. CAN you compare the two? Please, give me your opinion.
    this shows you're only arguing back without thinking first.
    There are tobacco and smoking advocacy groups, which challenge on a daily basis the results of tests or studies indicting tobacco or alcohol.
    Same as there is a "pedophile league" in Holland arguing in courts having sex for children under 10 is very good.
    They mostly do what you do: play the devil's advocated; cross their t's and point out any flaw in any study exposing tobacco or alcohol. They even have some physicians supporting their cause, mainly saying not every drinker/smoker dies out of his habit and many non-smoker/drinkers die of illness typically associated with the habit they were never into.
    No official body bothered with statistics on marriages with 30 years age gap because it is just so odd there aren't enough of them to make a significant samples, same as it would marriages between diabetics and led zeppelin fans.
    Then you have studies, but they vary depending on whom you ask.
    Agencies for example are extremely positive about it.




  8. #58

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    Ham, thank you for the last 4 quoates from elenag. You hit the nail right on the head when you said "this shows you're only arguing back without thinking first."Some people have the mind of a plant.
    The only people i know that ever married that were not in love, was normaly over a pregnancy Or trying to obtain citizenship, The ones that married for citizenship, lived together for a specified amount of time or not at all, Pretending to.
    Now in Elenag's Situation, and after carefully reading what she wrote, taking into consideration that she was writing 100 other guys. And seeing that see is a very attractive woman (wedding photo).
    OH, and by the way, I wanted to bring this up earlier, but did not want to look like i was on a witch hunt, but know that you posted Her quoates.
    What comes to my mind is that she sold herself to the highest bidder, its most likely that the other 100 could'nt afford her.
    HER QUOATES:
    He is the only one who seems to care enough about me to take care of
    my needs".
    He paid for my visa, trip to Moscow (to get it), for my tickets (and even extra for some nice things to do while my last few days in Russia), and had given me probably over $1000 in monthly support for months while the paperwork was processed.
    OK, Now correct me if I'm wrong, but the way i see it , all her husband did was buy himself a nice piece of ass,you know,live in escort, prostitute.
    what do you think would happen if he suddenly went broke overnight, would she stay ?? Its allways about the MONEY!!
    I can't help but wonder, How do you write to 100 guys at the same time, FORM LETTERS ?

    Sonar, Thanks, I did notice

    'WHATS THE ATTRACTION" ?

  9. #59
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    692

    Default

    well, at least her quotes are honest.
    what is scary ( at least what men, especially old, should be aware of ) is that she is not alone in that.

    quote:one more point: on our Women?s forum we discussed if any of our women were really ?in love? when they agreed to marry their husbands, 95% admitted that they were not in love. ne more point: on our Women?s forum we discussed if any of our women were really ?in love? when they agreed to marry their husbands, 95% admitted that they were not in love. Some said that they developed love and respect throughout their life with their spouses. Those, few who replied that they did fall in love before the marriage, were met with distrust and disbelief. Many said that it is impossible to fall in love with a stranger whom you met on-line. Surely, many (if not all) of these women assured their future husbands that they were ?in love? before the marriage. This is something to think about!
    http://www.russianwomenabroad.com/goeswrong.html


    at this point it is not a matter of single individuals.

  10. #60
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    423

    Default

    quote:Originally posted by ham
    You are not Jacques Derrida. Stop playing one. Well, so you say that minority people AND people into unconventional lifestyles do not cry foul every time they can AND pose as "mortally offended" as a way to divert attention from the main topic? If you say so...
    I am sorry I didn?t realize I was playing Jacques Derrida. Who is he/she, by the way?

    And you still didn?t answer my question. My question was: If only the people who are into unconventional lifestyle (such as blacks and minorities in your previous examples) freeze up or cry foul when feel offended, then what people who are into the conventional lifestyle do?


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    quote:Now, apples and pooping pants aside. I bet you have just as many skeletons in the closet as most of us, mortals. So why do you take so much pleasure in throwing stones at others?
    i am not a coward. i never dodged anything. i never sent anyone dying. i don't claim i want to invade another country because god told me so. i never flew up there while my country was under attack. So if that is the same as tax avoidance for you, then ok. You're mixing apples & dog's sh!t, but whatever.
    One more time: I don?t care about Bush, so can we please stop bringing him up?

    Also, please notice that you shifted the focus of the discussion again. I asked you, ?. I bet you have just as many skeletons in the closet as most of us, mortals. So why do you take so much pleasure in throwing stones at others? ?, and you gave me, ?At least I am not sending people to die!? speech. So, what about my question?


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    well, everybody loves fresh meat. Period.
    I am guessing it was a confirmation that I was right in my assumption that most men prefer younger females. For whatever reason.

    If that is the case, firstly, don?t you think we need to stop looking down at such behavior? If it is a norm more than a deviation from a norm, then maybe we can just get our heads around that those are laws of physical attraction and trying to suppress them will be rather difficult.

    Secondly, why do you call it ?meat?? You have repeated ?meat? several times. At first I thought it was you just being grumpy, but now I see it is more than that. Do you consider all women to be ?meat?, or just the young ones?



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    Then men got brains, not only balls.
    Balls tell me to a$$ rape her in the back alley.
    Brains tell me that i have nothing in common with her; that she's probably out of my league and that her only (or prominent) interest in dealing with me would be because i could provide her with a better lifestyle, more money or whatever.
    Such is not the most promising starting point for any relationship.
    That will require more & more money thrown at the problem, until either she gets bored or my wallet empties.
    Ok, very well. Thank you.
    Now. Your replay indicated that:
    1. You would be very pleased to have relationship (sexually abusive relationship?) with young attractive lady
    2. You understand that despite her sexual attractiveness, such lady nevertheless would not be the best choice for the relationship (for a number of reasons).

    Did I get it right?

    So, what makes you think that women are not capable of this very same calculation?

    Let?s see. I totally agree that many younger guys are certainly more physically appealing than some older guys (though of course depends on the guy and how they take care of themselves). However, despite their physical attractiveness, I understand that the younger guys may not be the best choice for my marriage (for a number of reasons).

    The only real difference is, that when you use this calculation, you call it ?common sense? and praise yourself for doing so, while when I use this calculation you look down at me and criticize my choice.



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    i already told you that.
    Given two women with very similar features (EG say blond/blue eyes, square jaw, this tall, this breast size ), yet one is 40 in great physical shape AND the other is 19 but weighs 180kg, has bad acne etc etc, THEN of course men will choose the 40yo. Men are not idiots.
    My point is, that even tho? wait, did you say ?breast size?? I had a good laugh right there? ok, anyway, I was saying that looks and attitudes are just or if not even more important, than age. (Except for compulsive people). Would you agree?


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    As i said, both the ugly young and the older ones are screened OUT of the picture at the beginning. There may be 2 equally similar & in equally good shape women, but one is 18 and another is 26...who do you think the man (especially old) would choose?
    If both women are equally interested in him and both have equally nice, positive personalities? Probably they younger one. From the evolutionary point of view, it would be a good choice. So, what?s the crime?



    quote:Originally posted by ham
    quote:Hm.. countless you say? How much exactly is ?countless? to you? Over 100 billions? Or over 1 billion? Or over 1 million? Or over 500,000? Or over 10,000? Or over 1,000? Or over 500? Or over 50? Or over 25? Or ten?
    poor job.
    On what?


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    You have no thousands over thousands of such "unconventional" marriages.
    How do you know? Or, no, let?s do it this way: how many such marriages are out there?


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    Therefore the failure rate (increasing from the average 40-50% ) will start from there.
    A wild guess (knowing such unconventional relationships stand much higher risk than average ones; and you said they do stand higher risk ), it is not far fetched to assume if the average divorce rate is 50%, then such marriages can be at a 60-70%+ divorce rate. Assuming the age gap only affects the whole in a 10-20% ratio.
    Oh, ok, so from 50% we went to a whooping 60-70%!!! Given that we all have a pretty poor chance to begin with, and given all the problems with the young guys, I will take extra 10-20% risk and marry the older one.


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    what's the only or predominant difference between a man in his 30 and one in his 50? On average, money. That is all. About your motives, you said it all yourself.
    Are you saying that all 50 years old have more money than 30 years old? Because otherwise your comment makes no sense to me.


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    this shows you're only arguing back without thinking first.
    And how did I showed that? I must have missed something?


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    There are tobacco and smoking advocacy groups, which challenge on a daily basis the results of tests or studies indicting tobacco or alcohol.
    Same as there is a "pedophile league" in Holland arguing in courts having sex for children under 10 is very good.
    So, now you comparing my arguments to the ones ?pedophile league" uses?!? I am starting to wonder what the next comparison will be?.


    quote:Originally posted by ham
    They mostly do what you do: play the devil's advocated; cross their t's and point out any flaw in any study exposing tobacco or alcohol.
    Well, at least they have some study material to argue about. What do we have on this subject? Times and times again I asked you to show me a study that has been conducted to show effects of age difference in marriage. As far as I can tell, there is none. Therefore, I repeat, we are just arguing our opinions. Very different from the tobacco issue in my opinion. They have statistics showing people smoking, at what ages, cases of cancer and other illnesses, etc etc.


    quote:
    No official body bothered with statistics on marriages with 30 years age gap because it is just so odd there aren't enough of them to make a significant samples
    Ok, it? probably true. But what about 20 years age gap? 15? 10? There are more of them.


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