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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    692

    Default anatomy of a doomed MOB marriage

    The article at the bottom was posted in russian elsewhere a long time ago & credited to a website now gone (immigrantov-net ).
    I think it is enlightening about how the whole MOB thing might be seen through the eyes of a FSUW.

    now this is hilarious.
    [u]Unless the man bragged he was some kind of millionaire ( and i don't think so, given he was decribed as mere "last best" ), what was she expecting?
    Someone who thinks the west is the land of plenty is a complete idiot & deserves whatever comes along.
    Did she expect a mension with servants?!
    Well, she should have made that clear in her ad...but she at times knew where she stood.
    There ARE wealthy men in the FSU...so why didn't she manage to trap one?
    ...because none would bother with a single mother in her 30s? Duh!
    The furniture is old...What did she expect, Louis XIV furniture worth a billion?
    All my furniture (except chairs, coaches etc ) comes from where i grew up as child; with a few 100s i could buy new one at the local store, but these are solid pieces of furniture with a sentimental value attached, so what?
    My parents have 30 yo ?man made? furniture they bought to last a lifetime and spent a fortune for.
    Was it just a "colorful box of cookies" or was she overspending?
    If one is not a millionaire or a drug dealer or some top dollar whatever, one must watch his expenditure.
    Ah...top dollar whatevers are HIGHLY UNLIKELY to go the MOB route.
    The article details about the ?colorful box of cookies? but gracefully omits the specifics of the ?phone bill?...which we can assume wasn't a mere $30, but perhaps many times over.
    The article makes a fool of him for suspecting mother & son discuss him in russian, but at the same time huge phone bills arrive because she has to ?discuss her worries with her mother?. Later in the article it is specified she is increasingly worried/annoyed/disappointed/frustrated because of her husband, which shows he's not far off the mark smelling a rat.
    She is disappointed he cannot really act like a true father for her son, but to start with she had a poor opinion of him and intended to bear no children to him...good double standard.
    Last, she left her job, burnt bridges...but the first part of the article details how desperate she was and -by legitimate inference- how minimal or worthless her chances at home were; so much that she didn't discriminate much, but hopped in the lap of the first comer...while perhaps telling him she loved him dearly.
    As foolish as any man can be, i seriously doubt anyone would bring home a woman through the burdensome MOB procedure, who told him openly she doesn't love him, and he's just a meal ticket or a ?last best? option. Yet a poll on a MOB forum stated 95%+ FSUWs didn't love their husbands by the time of marriage, despite telling him so.
    I see the man in this case as a victim of his delusion...we can picture she is not going to ?just leave?, but will take him for all she can...after all she ?deserves it? for ?putting up with his crap?, right? And little Igor cannot land on a sidewalk, right?
    And this was (supposedly) some single mother in her 30s...how bigger and bolder expectations of young bachelorettes can be?

    Buyer Beware!




    quote:Part 2: a typical meeting in person. A woman, lets call her Lena,
    wants to get married. She is 32 and has a 10 year old child. Ot's hard
    to make ends meet. Lena works 8 hourse a day for a small salary.
    Spends her evenlings in a small apartment she shares with her son
    watching TV or on the phone with her girlfriend. She can't affort
    expensive vacations or fancy outfits. But this is not as important,
    as the feeling that years are passing her by. There aren't many good
    men around, and those who are not so bad are mosly paying attention
    on women much younger with no kids. Lena decides to try her luck by
    giving her profile to a marriage agency and seeing what hapens. She
    takes photos, sends them to the agencies. She wants. She even receives
    some replies. But mostly from some trange men with "issues" and
    problems. "send me a photo in your underwear" - writes one man, "I
    did not reply to you last month because I was being treated for
    mental problems" - writes another onen being blunt and open. So
    when a third man appears and writes normal letters about how lonely
    he is... Lena already starts thinking this is a great opportunity.
    She got lucky! Here is THE man. The photos arrive and there is
    a normal man on them. Normal but a stranger. Not attractive or
    anything. "Don't be so picky", tell her her friends - "he is a
    perfectly normal man with a mustage. Has a job. Writes good letters?
    What else do you need? If you are planning to be so picky you will
    stay alone until retirement!

    The arguments are very compelling. Lena understand herself she
    shouldn't take such luck for granted.
    If I say "No" to
    him, when will the "normal" man write to me? And then she hears her
    friend tell her that her friend
    that married AM last\ year vacationed in Maiami. "That's it!" -
    exclaims Lena, ready to marry a
    decent man with mustage w/o even looking at
    him.

    A man comes to visit Lena. The first impression males Lena feel
    uneasy. There is something in him, but the man is very different from
    his photo. The last hair fell out. He looks 50 even though he
    sworw he just turned 43. Upon careful examination Lena realizes he is
    also much shorter than he said he was. He loloks 170 cm not 174 like
    he said in letters. Lena is disappointed. The groom is pleasant and
    smiling, he is happy about everything. He likes the food. "What more
    do you need?", - whispers a neighbor." He is a normal man. It's not
    like you will bear his children? One child is enough".
    "Makes sence" - thinks Lena, and she realizes that a man will be a
    father to her son and will support him.

    At night a man behaves in a gentelmanly way. He obviously wants her
    but doesn't grab her, contains himself. Lena is happy about it. At
    the end of the week a man looks at Lena with loving eyes and asks for
    her hand in marriage. Lena is in doubt and asks for time to think.
    When the man leaves Lena all of a sudden feels sad. Did she miss her
    last chance?
    Lyuba is waiting for the second year and nobody visits *her*. "If I
    refuse I will miss my last chance". "If you dan't want
    A groom is calling often and even sends a couple of hundreds of $$
    for the trip. All this makes Lena finally decide to say
    "Yes". In a month Lena leaves her job, borrows a lot of money to look
    presentable abroad, and flies far away to get MARRIED.

    AND HERE IT TURNS OUT:
    The apartment is tiny. The couch on the foto is in someone else's
    apartment. He lives at the edge of a small town and out
    of his kitchen window one can see a near by farm. The living room
    furniture is about 20 years old. And the groom himself
    is not as happy in his own world as he was in Russia. He is not on
    vacation. He is at home. And it's very different. Here he
    is worried about his problems. He is often in a bad mood. Upon
    receiving a new bill he is nervously touching his mustage.
    He gets impatient with Lena. He gets annoyed at her son just by
    looking at him. Conversations in Russian with lena's son
    make him crimson red. He is always imagining they are discussing him.
    Lena feels increasingly uneasy, nobody is flying her to Maiami. At
    the supermarket she meets his angry stare when she
    reaches for a colorful box of cookies. But the real fight happens
    when the phone bill arrives end of the month. Lena often
    calls home to share her worries with her mom. The life becomes
    unbearable but there is no way to return. She is already
    married. She left her job, burned her bridges. No, of course it's
    possible to come back. But? Lena, are you crazy?! ?
    a friend is screaming into the phone, - there are no jobs...The water
    is turned off. A little boy was raped in school.
    Lena calms doen for the time being. But not for long. She looks at
    the aging apartment and at a husband whom she is
    beginning to hate and tears feel her eyes..



  2. #2

    Default

    Too bad. They deserve each other.

    Can't say I care either way.

  3. #3

    Default

    Ham; thank you for the article.

    And I mostly concur with your analysis of it. This lady was all about whining and complaining about her husband's middle-class status.

    Where is the "dusha" in this woman? Is she incapable of simply loving a man, and striving with him to make a good life? Working with him to acquire nicer furniture together? A house together closer to the city?

    So much for the professed modesty and family orientation of FSU ladies! Most Australian girls would be much less demanding. And if an Aussie girl is materialistic, her materialism almost always comes with common sense, diligence and parsimony!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    692

    Default

    quote:So much for the professed modesty and family orientation of FSU ladies! Most Australian girls would be much less demanding. And if an Aussie girl is materialistic, her materialism almost always comes with common sense, diligence and parsimony!
    I read once articles describing the fortunes made by ( a few ) people selling the good old Johnny Atlas "courses" gimmick of turning the bum tired of the bullies kicking sand in his face into some sort of hero able to kick sand back in the bullies' faces, take it in terms of relationships, sexual performance, finances, physical fitness, whatever.
    The MOB thing as peddled by parties with vested interests in no more than one of these $9,99 e-books to get you wealthy in six weeks.
    And i don't think the problem are FSUWs in general, but those you meet through the WWW/LD/MOB scene.

  5. #5

    Default

    quote:Originally posted by seajay



    Most Australian girls would be much less demanding. And if an Aussie girl is materialistic, her materialism almost always comes with common sense, diligence and parsimony!
    Obviously your statement is not based on facts. IF what you say is true explain the 50% marriage failure rate of Australians and indeed the Western World!!.

    You might take the example of a certain owner of an Australian Tyre Franchise as an example. His partner did not match your 'generalisations' you subscribed to in the above statement.

  6. #6

    Default

    quote:Originally posted by seajay



    Most Australian girls would be much less demanding. And if an Aussie girl is materialistic, her materialism almost always comes with common sense, diligence and parsimony!
    Obviously your statement is not based on facts. IF what you say is true explain the 50% marriage failure rate of Australians and indeed the Western World!!.

    You might take the example of a certain owner of an Australian Tyre Franchise as an example. His partner did not match your 'generalisations' you subscribed to in the above statement.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    23

    Default

    Having survived marriage to a FSU beauty, I'll give a couple of much generalized observations. I do believe that each relationship rises or falls on its own merits, but I wish someone had told me these things first.

    1. General pessimism. Western media and culture tend to be optimistic, a "glass half full" mentality. Viktor Chernomyrdin best summarized the FSU mentality with his oft quoted statement, "We hoped for the best, but things turned out as usual.? Someone who constantly complains, constantly criticizes, and generally expects the worst out of each new experience will wear you down with time.

    2. Mir mentality. The mir was the ancient Rus village that was the collective building block of civilization. If you are not a member of your FSU girl's mir, you will be viewed with suspicion. They trust the friends they had in childhood. Everyone else is expendable. "I may be married to you, but you are not my family" is how it was explained to me.

    3. Rampant materialism. When was the last time you got together with your friends to compare wrist watches & shoes? My FSU had a club just for such things. Chanel, Gucci, Prada, you name it. They are slaves to the labels and the more expensive the better. I thought a FSU girl would be less materialistic than a Westerner. Wrong. They are MUCH, MUCH, MORE.

    4. Really bad sex. I have to mention this only because at least a half dozen members of my FSU victims club have mentioned this. Many FSU women are gorgeous. I can't resist them, honestly. But it seems that all of my friends who went down this road describe a woman who was accommodating, but not particularly enthusiastic at the outset, followed by being completely unresponsive sexually once married. If you are into necrophilia, you are going to LOVE sex with your FSU bride. No touching, no kissing, stiff as a board, blank expression, and quiet as a mouse. You can ignore it for a while if you like, but one day it hits you, that rape would be infinitely more enjoyable. To her it probably is rape already.

    So there you have it. I advise dating FSU beauties, sampling the goods, and leaving. Do not bring one home. You will not be able to house train your new pet, and it will bite you in the ass each chance she gets.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    23

    Default

    Having survived marriage to a FSU beauty, I'll give a couple of much generalized observations. I do believe that each relationship rises or falls on its own merits, but I wish someone had told me these things first.

    1. General pessimism. Western media and culture tend to be optimistic, a "glass half full" mentality. Viktor Chernomyrdin best summarized the FSU mentality with his oft quoted statement, "We hoped for the best, but things turned out as usual.? Someone who constantly complains, constantly criticizes, and generally expects the worst out of each new experience will wear you down with time.

    2. Mir mentality. The mir was the ancient Rus village that was the collective building block of civilization. If you are not a member of your FSU girl's mir, you will be viewed with suspicion. They trust the friends they had in childhood. Everyone else is expendable. "I may be married to you, but you are not my family" is how it was explained to me.

    3. Rampant materialism. When was the last time you got together with your friends to compare wrist watches & shoes? My FSU had a club just for such things. Chanel, Gucci, Prada, you name it. They are slaves to the labels and the more expensive the better. I thought a FSU girl would be less materialistic than a Westerner. Wrong. They are MUCH, MUCH, MORE.

    4. Really bad sex. I have to mention this only because at least a half dozen members of my FSU victims club have mentioned this. Many FSU women are gorgeous. I can't resist them, honestly. But it seems that all of my friends who went down this road describe a woman who was accommodating, but not particularly enthusiastic at the outset, followed by being completely unresponsive sexually once married. If you are into necrophilia, you are going to LOVE sex with your FSU bride. No touching, no kissing, stiff as a board, blank expression, and quiet as a mouse. You can ignore it for a while if you like, but one day it hits you, that rape would be infinitely more enjoyable. To her it probably is rape already.

    So there you have it. I advise dating FSU beauties, sampling the goods, and leaving. Do not bring one home. You will not be able to house train your new pet, and it will bite you in the ass each chance she gets.

  9. #9

    Default

    In reference to my own statement:

    quote:Most Australian girls would be much less demanding. And if an Aussie girl is materialistic, her materialism almost always comes with common sense, diligence and parsimony!
    participant cmilia wrote:

    quote:Obviously your statement is not based on facts. IF what you say is true explain the 50% marriage failure rate of Australians and indeed the Western World!!.

    You might take the example of a certain owner of an Australian Tyre Franchise as an example. His partner did not match your 'generalisations' you subscribed to in the above statement.

    Do we have 50% marriage failure? Let?s say, for expediency, that we do.

    Marriage failure comes about for countless reasons. Does cmilia argue that female materialism is the most prominent cause of marriage breakdown in Australia? In the West? That this is the cause of at least half of our 50% marriage failure rate?

    Most Australian girls would be much less demanding than the Russian female that Ham described. And materialistic Australian girls usually are prepared to work and save, so that they can indulge their materialism. Granted, there are no statistics about this, so this specific statement is based on my personal observations. So yes, you could argue (but not convincingly) that this specific statement is not based on facts.

    Now, the tyre tycoon.

    The tyre tycoon?s story is extreme and outrageous for Australia. (cmilia ? do you disagree?) However, even using this tycoon?s example, consider the comparison.

    Yes, with this Australian extreme, it could be argued, but not conclusively, that you have a materialistic lady. The Russian, however, is definitely materialistic.

    For those unfamiliar with the owner of the Australian tyre franchise, here is a link to one of the many articles:

    http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/sto...81-661,00.html

    They met 20 years ago and eventually wed. He was 58, with six children from two broken relationships. She was 19, a legal secretary and the runner-up in a beauty quest that he was judging.

    The marriage lasted almost 19 years, and she bore him two daughters and a son.

    The age difference was 39 years.

    Ham?s Russian example, which I addressed, was 32 years old with a 10 year old child. The westerner she marries is 43. So, 11 years as opposed to 39 years in the Australian?s case.

    The Russian example despises her hubby almost immediately upon discovering he is not disgustingly rich.
    Our 19 year old Australian beauty queen stays with the 39-years older fellow, and bears him children, for almost 19 years.

    Yes the tycoon, 78 and fighting prostate cancer, nearing the end of his life, accuses her of all sorts of horrible things. But her friends and extended family, without one dissenter, observe that she still loves this fellow.

  10. #10

    Default

    In reference to my own statement:

    quote:Most Australian girls would be much less demanding. And if an Aussie girl is materialistic, her materialism almost always comes with common sense, diligence and parsimony!
    participant cmilia wrote:

    quote:Obviously your statement is not based on facts. IF what you say is true explain the 50% marriage failure rate of Australians and indeed the Western World!!.

    You might take the example of a certain owner of an Australian Tyre Franchise as an example. His partner did not match your 'generalisations' you subscribed to in the above statement.

    Do we have 50% marriage failure? Let?s say, for expediency, that we do.

    Marriage failure comes about for countless reasons. Does cmilia argue that female materialism is the most prominent cause of marriage breakdown in Australia? In the West? That this is the cause of at least half of our 50% marriage failure rate?

    Most Australian girls would be much less demanding than the Russian female that Ham described. And materialistic Australian girls usually are prepared to work and save, so that they can indulge their materialism. Granted, there are no statistics about this, so this specific statement is based on my personal observations. So yes, you could argue (but not convincingly) that this specific statement is not based on facts.

    Now, the tyre tycoon.

    The tyre tycoon?s story is extreme and outrageous for Australia. (cmilia ? do you disagree?) However, even using this tycoon?s example, consider the comparison.

    Yes, with this Australian extreme, it could be argued, but not conclusively, that you have a materialistic lady. The Russian, however, is definitely materialistic.

    For those unfamiliar with the owner of the Australian tyre franchise, here is a link to one of the many articles:

    http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/sto...81-661,00.html

    They met 20 years ago and eventually wed. He was 58, with six children from two broken relationships. She was 19, a legal secretary and the runner-up in a beauty quest that he was judging.

    The marriage lasted almost 19 years, and she bore him two daughters and a son.

    The age difference was 39 years.

    Ham?s Russian example, which I addressed, was 32 years old with a 10 year old child. The westerner she marries is 43. So, 11 years as opposed to 39 years in the Australian?s case.

    The Russian example despises her hubby almost immediately upon discovering he is not disgustingly rich.
    Our 19 year old Australian beauty queen stays with the 39-years older fellow, and bears him children, for almost 19 years.

    Yes the tycoon, 78 and fighting prostate cancer, nearing the end of his life, accuses her of all sorts of horrible things. But her friends and extended family, without one dissenter, observe that she still loves this fellow.

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