Letter(s) from Hawa Bansi to Neal (USA)

Letter 1

This is me and if you are wiling to continue is okay ...But i will assure you that there will be no nude pictures okay ...

Letter 2

I come here today in this way because I need to apologize to you. I failed you. Although I did lie to you in words, I lied to you with faces that did not belong to me. I never meant to ruin the friendship that meant the world to me. You mean the world to me and now I come to you asking for forgiveness. If in your heart you find you cant, then I will understand and learn from this experience.You have come into my life at a time when I needed you the most. We talked about so many things that I started to realize my heart and my soul could actually feel something other than hurt. You placed comfort where there was fear, confidence where there was doubt, a shoulder where tears could fall and completeness where there was emptiness. I wanted to hold onto to this so badly that I did whatever it took for you to notice. What I didnt realize was that I could lose my entire being, all of who I was and all that I had placed in you. I wanted to be the one who would be there when you needed to talk. I wanted to be the comfort for your soul when the world was too much to handle. I wanted to be strong for you when everything else seemed impossible. I wanted to love you in only the way you deserved to be loved, never realizing that I was destroying myself and you. Somehow I needed you to be a part of my life. The only problem was that I was willing to jeopardize anything to get that done.All the things that I told you about how I felt and how you make me feel were true. Nothing else mattered to me except hearing the laughter in your voice when you were happy. You made my days easy to get through and my nights at peace, looking forward to another day, even though distance separates us just being was enough.Im sorry for hurting you and if I had to do all over again I would have been 100% with you.

Forgive me please,Hawa

Letter 3

Hmm im sorry my friends lost the camera yesterday when they went to celebrate their valentine

Letter 4

So how was your night ?

Letter 5

Yes with you on my mind i did .... I sit here in sorrow, wishing I could hold you. I have realized that I have tried to replace you over and over since I made the foolish decision to leave you. But, no one can make me laugh and smile like you do..I love you

Letter 6

You are the only one that ever made me so happy. No one could ever take your place. I feel as if my soul has stolen my heart and left me to cry myself to sleep each and every night with guilt in my heart of how I hurt you

Letter 7

What do you mean by DTA

Letter 8

Ohh yes you are right ..But now im with a clean heart for you

Letter 9

I guess you just dont realize what you have until its gone. I was so stupid to leave you. I know sorry is just a word, but for what its worth I am very sorry and I beg with every ounce of my soul please forgive me

Letter 10

What are you trying to say that you cant forgive me ?

Letter 11

Ok then what are you trying to say ?

Letter 12

Ok but what i have is ..For me im fully true now and im ready to be your wife if you also like me as your wife ... Time will tell

Letter 13

So you can go now and have a nice day ..Please if you dont mind try and get me something little so that me and my family can eat please i beg you in the name of God