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Letter(s) from Polina Smirnova to Martj (New Zealand)
Many thanks for replaying on my add. I was very glad to receive your message.
I am very glad that we have posibillity know each other throught internet, because two persons wich live in different points of the world can meet and be together.
A couple words about me. Those words of me I prepared in the past to tell about myself. It is an honest and accurate description of me and my personality. If it appeals to you I can promise you I am exactly how I represent myself. You will never find a better and more loving, faithful, devoted, woman than me.
First I have to tell you that I am a good speaking English (I hope), and I think it is quite important.
So, my real name is Polina. I am 30 years old, my birthday is on April 2nd, 1974, weight 54kg. (115 lbs) and my height is 168(5.6). I have been married before, but divorced 4 years ago. And have no kids. I was born and now living in Odessa, south of Ukraine. It is about 500 miles from Kiev the capitol of Ukraine. In Odessa is about 1.500,000 people hear and one million in the bay area. I have my mother living in Odessa and brother living in Moscow.
My mother is working for the University as a fisics teacher and my brother working at the bank in Moscow (40 years old). My fater has passed away about 6 years ago from the heart illness. Loosing my father has hurted me greatly and this is something I hope I never have to go thru again. He was a great man. It was a really sad way to see him go. But I know he is in no pain now. My Mom lives in Odessa and is doing not very well since the passing of my Dad. She and I are really close. She is really great.
I have finished teachers college and used to work as an teacher of biology in the middle school since 2001. Well, as you can understand, teacher of biology is a quite borring job and there is not much to say aout it. But I do really love kids and I adore to work with them and to teach them. This was the main reason I went to work at the school.
So, I am living in a one bedroom flat with my mother. I like music, literature, sport, very like nature and many other things. I dream to meet the person, who will be a real friend for me, and do never make me down, who will love me for who I am and respect my interests.
The life isn't simply for me now but I hope the God will give me the chance to be happy. I want know more about your character. What is most important for you in a person. How do you spend your day?
I don't know too much about your country, but if you want you can tell me about this.
Now the weather is very cold and snow storming. I used to go to the seaside and to watch on the sea, especially in the evening. I like dream at this moment. I'm fond of reading books particularly on rainy days or on a cold winter evening.
What about you? What do you like to do when the rain is going?
I like animals and but don't have any by my own. I do not smoke and I love sport very much. I like swimming. Do you like sport? What kind of sport do you like? I love flowers and to grow them up.
When is you birthday?
I decided to place my add in the Internet not in a moment. After too much of thinking during long time I placed my add. I had it done just now. I must say truth: I receive many messages from men. But I placed my add at the Internet not for the correspondence. My main goal is marriage. I sure, that a meeting is more important than writing a 100 letters! It does not mean that I believe we should not write. I believe in corresponding (short) as a way to exchange ideas and to know more about each others dreams, desires, strengths, weaknesses and so on. But as I said, our meeting and taking time to become acquainted is most important!
I am sorry, I ask you a lot of questions but I would love to learn more about you, because I like you.
Well I will close my message and wait your answer soon.
I wish you a nice week and keep smile.
First of all, thank you for your letter and interest to me. I have re-read your leter many times and I find that you are very attractive to me. You seems to me so charming, intellectual and both serious and cheerful man. I am not sure what to write or how to begin.
I think it is more difficult to meet with words, letters, and photos than it is in real life, person to person. But I do think it might have some advantages. It can be more personal in some ways. Maybe more honest. Okay Martj, I want to prepare you I am writing a long letter and it is not usual for me, but I wanted to answer any questions that you might have and let you know a little bit more about me.
Forgive me (in advance) if it is boring to you. IMPORTANT! Although I have a computer on my own I just got service of Internet provider for a correspondence, because before I had no internet at my home, but I came to realize that if I want to find someone for a life time I should start from somewhere. So, although it is hard for me to pay monthly for an internet I did my fisrt step to find you and got the internet. Unfortunatelly I can't use MSN Messenger, or web camera, because I am paying for internat per minute and it would be very expencive for me to chat with you on line, I am sorry.
As the matter of fact, I read and write in English quite well. I speak English as well also,but I have no an opportunity for a practice. So Martj, please, now you know that I am paying for the internet to be able to write to you and it is very hard for me. Please realize that I am very serious towards you and I ask you to please not play a games with me. Okay. Are you serious towards me? I hope you do.
Unfortunatelly I was not able to travel outside of Ukraine, as I could never afford it. Well, my childhood. I have two vivid recollections from my childhood. The first of them, this is teacher of latin dance - strong, beautiful, slim woman, who was in her thirties. I wanted to look like her very much. It seems to me I reached this now, except the age:-) When I was 12 years old I stopped my lessons, because I grew up taller than 163 cm. It's maximum reasonable growth for those kind of dancers. It was very ruefully. I had good achievements by that time. And the second recollection is my farming in Grandparents little house. I planted potatoes. It goes without saying I did this not by myself. I was as an assistant of my grandmother. I cherished a hope to see results my work, but a whole plantation was eaten by the Colorado beetle. I hate those beetles since then. :-)
Well, as I have told you I am living with my mother, my mother is supporting me time to time as my job as a teacher brings so very little money. As about my marriage and divorce....There is not truly too much to say. I married him when I was 24 years old. I wanted to have a family so badly so married him whitout even knowing if I ever loved him or not. He treated me like a prinsess and said too much words of love to me and I thought his love would be enought for both of us.....but I was so very wrong. God knows I did everything I could to make this marriage works out even thru I never really loved him. I have never cheated on him, I was always true and did my best to make him happy.....but then, after some time, he turned to be absolutelly another person, not the same when I married him.....I think he was cheating on me.....basically he took me for granted......So we lived together for 2 years and then got divorced. And so, we got divorced 4 years ago. Yes, we didn't have kids, because he used to say that we should wait to have kids. I think he didn't wanted to have kids at all, but I wanted so much. I am calm, sincere, resolute and a tender person. I am a quite romantic person too. I like nice everything, fashion clothes, difference costume. I like clothes of difference styles - different dresses: two-piece, evening dresses, house dresses and high-necked dress too; clothes of classic style and sport clothes. I like an elegance shoes of different styles. Green, orange, black, white, lilac, blue are my preferable colors. But my favorite color is red. I like very much a nature, flowers, a grass. I would like to plant different trees, shrubbery's and flowers. My favorite flower is a rouse. I drink socially. I like a sweets and a white wine. I go to sport club for aerobic and training. Sometimes I go to a swimming pool. I enjoy watching TV, reading detectives, history and advantage literature, love-novel, magazines and newspapers. I have a cultural side as well, which includes going to the theatre, opera, cinema or art-exhibitions.
About the values of my life I am not strictly religious, meaning I don't attend usually churches, but I believe in high moral values coming from Christian tradition, such as truth, respect of individual dignity, solidarity, understanding.I want to say that for me the basic things are love and family and in my conceptions to life they have the priority on the rest. I also have a sense of humor and I have a sense of adventure. I think a person needs to have an ability to laughat life and himself sometimes. My current lifestyle reflects that I am single. If I get involved in a proper serious relationship my lifestyle will of course be adapted accordingly - taking your wishes and dreams into account. Unfortunately, it's very difficult (it's impossible) to find a match in my country. The most part of men isn't able to support a family. If a man is rather well-to-do, he behaves as snob. As I know the men, who live in Western Europe, USA and other civilization are able to due a woman. It's main reason of my search a soulmate outside Ukraine. How nice it would be to have someone to share life with! Someone to share your dreams and vision someone to listen to and talk with someone who shares the burden, and the joy of life! Is this too much to dream about? Please write me back and tell me about you, your family, and what your life is like. Tell me about your job Martj, interests, and what is important to you. What do you dream about when you look up into the sky, on a cold, clear, winter night, with the stars shining bright? I know that this is a rather long letter, but you are the man! I wanted to try and answer all of the questions that you may have, and let you know more about me. Of course, there is much more to ask you and tell you, but I want you to know that I am interested in knowing you much more. I hope to hear you soon.
Warmest regards, Polina.
Dear Martj. Thank you for your message. I do understand that you are busy at the moment. I will be waiting for your letter. But please don't forget about me as I will be really waiting for your letter.
It is pleasant for me to hear from you once again as apart of you sound interest, it also means that you care. I found your letter very interesting and very impressive, I really would like to get to know you better, so hopefully one day soon enough, we would be able to meet in person and get what both of us are looking for.
I had more replies and to be honest with you, I found your letter the most interested, so I have choose to write to you Martj, that means that I have stoped correspondence with any one else, because I want to devote all my attention to you. I have met some other guys after my divorce, because I always knew I need to have a family, to take care of someone and love someone. But it seems like I met so many wrong people in my short life that at some point in my life I thought I would never find the right one for me. But with the times goes by, I realized that I have to stop looking and just to be waiting for someone, as I am sure the best things in lifealways happends when you less excpect it....don't you agree?
My mother doesn't mind if I find someone to love from another country and leave, because my mother wants me to be happy no mater where I am. Last two days I am talking with my mom a lot about you. Of course she is wishing me to be happy. She doesen't know English language and when I read some phrases from your letters it makes her smille. She said it doesen't matter what language person is using for writing the letter, the matter is what inside of that person. I can understand her, she is right. Of course it would be difficult for her if I will leave to the other country. But I asked her opinion about my future and she said that she want me to be happy no matter what, and no matter where I will be.
In terms of children, yes I would like to have children some day - but not for a couple of years at least. If I was to get married, I would want to spend lots of time with my husband first before having children and settling down properly. When I do have kids, I want them to have the best, and that means waiting a little while so we can afford the best.
As about your questions. How many pairs of shoes do I own? I think about 5 or 6. How much time do I spend applying my cosmetics each morning and each evening before bed? I think 30 minutes all together. Do I always have long hair? Have I had short hair before? Yes I had. I love to change the stayle of my hair.
And by the way, all my pictures that I sent you were taken with in two years, so there is not much of an age difference. Although I like travelling, I had never been abroad before, as I never could afford to, but I really would like to visit other countries. Also I am not afraid a difference in the mentality. I ready to assimilate any culture, nationalities basics and traditions. But I'd prefer to have to do with a close culture.
I know, it will be very difficult for me to find a job, at least at first time. But it's not impossible. If we would get to like each other a lot through this correspondence, and decide to get married or live together, how would your family and friends take it that you would be marrying an Ukrainian girl?
I need a man to come home to, a man to give me his affections and one I can give mine in return. I need a best friend and a sexual lover. I decided to place my add hoping the right man would come into my life and change it forever. I must say the truth: I don't know exactly, what a type of man I look forward. I need to feel my man. Therefore we need to spend some time together. It seems to me, that the time for these exams will be longer than one or two weeks. But, who knows? What about "chemistry"? I believe in love from the first sighnt! And you, Martj? What things are important in your life?
In a relationship, I think trust is the single most important fundamental item. With trust, understanding and commitment are possible. Without trust, nothing is possible. I think if you only look in a certain vicinity, you are not being fair to yourself. Once again we share the same feelings about real life fairy tales. I believe that when you meet that person with whom you can connect intellectually, emotionally and physically, you feel like you are in a fairy tale. I am very romantic, and enjoy quality time and emotional connection. I am a big believer in respect Martj, especially when it comes to relationships. I also believe very strongly in being faithful to my man. Maybe part of the reason I feel so strongly about it is because I was in a relationship where the other person was not faithful. I remember how bad it felt and how much it hurt, and I would not want to inflict that pain on someone I care about. I also believe that relationships require work, just like anything else in life, if you want to gain the benefits, you must make the effort.
I shall stop here for today and I hope that you are still very interested in me and write to me again when you can.
With love Polina.
First of all I want to thank you for having written, it really means much for me. You have definitely given me some long, hard, serious thought to what you want in life and in love. Of course we should meet to find out if we meant to be together. I feel and I know that for me to get to know who you really are I need to come to you first, to see your life there, to meet your friends, to meet your family, to be around you there. This way I could find out if I could be there with you for a life time. For me to come to you it is realize your world and if I wish to be part of it. And if I would come to you first we could make a desicion right there and right then. So, my point is would you like me to come to visit you for a while for the first time? Think about it please and let me know your thoughts on it.
My mother doesn't mind if I find someone to love from another country and leave, because my mother wants me to be happy no mater where I am. Last two days I am talking with my mom a lot about you, Martj. Of course she is wishing me to be happy. She doesen't know English language and when I read some phrases from your letters it makes her smille. She said it doesen't matter what language person is using for writing the letter, the matter is what inside of that person. I can understand her, she is right. Of course it would be difficult for her if I will leave to the other country. But I asked her opinion about my future and she said that she want me to be happy no matter what, and no matter where I will be.
I think love is not limited geographically, and even if I have other means to meet someone with whom I could fall in love, I am not against the way of internet to have the first contact with a person that I would have never be able to be in touch otherwise. When two persons lived together, it's not to make war or difficulties to the other. It's to help together, to be tender and united. I think soul is very important, more important than physic. It's sometime difficult to love and to be loved. The common live need a lot of understanding and respect, but I strong believe in those values. I think in Ukraine, people are very selfish and individualist so I search for someone from another country. And I think we share traditional values about family, respect and understanding. I'm very sentimental and sensual. I love to give tenderness. I have some difficulties to say my sincerity with a letter. A real meeting will be better and more authentic. I don't know if my English can translate my thought and I don't know if your understand me. Ah, but now comes the other side to a relationship.
So, Martj, I will share my thoughts with you: Two people need to make a commitment forever. Not just the good times, but the difficult times as well. A man and a woman must be open to whatever changes may come their way. And yet, they must hold fast to their belief in one another and their love. They must have the open communications that are so vital - a willingness to talk about anything and every thing. A deep acceptance of the others individuality - that they need not be, think, act the same. In spite of the differences, they will always seek to return to the common ground which caused them to love in the first place. It is all to easy to just give up on a relationship when times are tough or when there are disagreements. It is so much more difficult to say, "We will not allow differences to come between us". That is the biggest part of commitment, and the hardest. Yes, the warmth and sharing, the touch and the caring are important. But the commitment to make it through the hard times TOGETHER is just as important. Two people who want to walk through life together must choose to walk the rough climb as well as the gentle downward slope. They must face the angry words and disappointments and seek resolution, just as they must treasure those quiet, intimate times. To find one who can commit - who will never give up when times are hard, that is the challenge. Okay Martj, I have probably bored you with my long letter, I am sorry, I will be waiting for your letter, Sincerely and with love, Polina.
P.S. My full name and home address is:
Shorsa 120/54, Odessa, 65000, Ukraine. Polina Smirnova.