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Letter(s) from Olga Shishcina to Fernando (USA)
Hi, my dear friend Fernando! Day by day I feel more need in getting your letter.
My mood has become better again when I have got your letter. I should say that when I have good mood I hear gratitude from my patients much more often (smile).
Therefore, now the health of a Russian people depend on your letters (smile again).
Of course I'll give you my address. But I am not sure if is possible to trust Russian mail. The big shame to me to inform about it, but our mail works for us not reliably. A lot of letters and parcels do not reach the addressee. I will be worried very much if your package will not reach me. If you want to send me letter, your package should have the minimal sizes and do not draw attention of custom house. In Russian custom house checks everything, and customs officers decide what to skip and what to confiscate or detain. It's impossible to find a parcel or letter after that, especially if a sending from America. I do not want your letter parcel to come into the hands of any fat old customs guy or into the hands of his girlfriend. I would not want, that greedy customs officer has sold or has simply given your parcel to any interested person, or simply would open it ostensibly for checking assignment of contents.
Zip code: 403060
You are interested in my last name. My full name Shishcina Olga.
Shishcina is my last name and Olga is my first name.
Thanks for a videoclip. It was fine.
To my regret I could not visit an exhibition. Last days was a lot of work and I could not go to Volgograd. But it not death (smile). By the way, when I came to work today, my mood was bad, because my friend Elvira fell ill and now she is in the hospital. The saddest thing is that she has birthday today. She is 30 years old today. Unfortunately she will spend her birthday in the hospital. But I have already talked with a doctor and I will be allowed to spend evening in her chamber. In the evening I will bake a cake, I will buy balloons and go to the hospital. I hope very much that she will have good mood on her birthday. She is my best friend. By the way, she works with me in the clinic. Elvira the doctor the otolaryngologist in our clinic. As a matter of fact I have only two real friends - Elvira and Albina. Elvira is a lady who is in the hospital. Albina is our friend already for several years. Elvira and I are like sisters. We like to take a walk. Usually we walk in the park. But also we like to spend time in Elvira vegetable garden. She lives in an old wooden house.
I don't know if you have seen such houses. It is the houses which were built before the Second World War, in the fortieth years. These are very old houses which don't have bath and running water. So people have to take water outside in the well. In modern world such conditions seem very terrible, but this is really so. We like to spend time in Elvira vegetable garden. There she grows the potato, tomatoes and cucumbers not to buy them in the market. Every winter Elvira, Albina and I together build a big Snowman in her vegetable garden, using a big snow spheres. We put carrot instead of nose, and potatoes instead of eyes.
It is very funny. All neighbor's children came to see it. By the way, if we want to fool about, we put carrots not only instead of a nose but also below..... (hint and smile) First time we made such Snowman 10 years ago. Since that time we do it every year. It is a tradition for us. We poured it with water to cover with ice. So it could stand for the whole winter. I like Log. Almost all people in our village know each other. Elvira says that she wants to live in a big city. I don't know where is better. Big city is a big traffic, fast rhythm of life, garlands of fires, lightning's of shop windows, high buildings, fountains, cinemas, parks, attractions, theatres. It is wonderful, of course I like it. But our village is a fresh air, a lot of trees and birds, silent and comfortable, cozy, quiet place, no hubris and vanity inherent for big cities. We have a lot of small and large lakes and rivers. The places are very beautiful. If there was no criminality, it would be paradise.
But alas, the criminal in small cities, as well as in the big cities is an integral part our life. Unfortunately the crime in Russia is on a very high level. But I don't want to tell about sad things. Several times, Elvira, Albina and I went to the festival of bard song. This is a place on the coast of the river where a lot of people come from all country. At night the coast is covered with thousand fires lights. The scene is a huge raft having the form of a guitar and established right on water and everybody who wants to sing together with famous bard singers, goes on this raft and starts to sing. And all thousands people become silent and listen to this singer even if he is absolutely unknown. It is the unique festival. I have to finish my letter. I don't want but I have to do it. Today when I will come to Elvira we will talk about you. She likes to ask about you and I like to tell her. I wanted to ask you what makes you happy Fernando? What was the best gift from a woman you got?
Sincerely your, and with best wishes.
P.S. I hope you can play the enclosed file. In the next letter inform me.
Hi, Fernando. I am very glad that you have written me. Thank you very much. You cannot imagine how much I wait for messages from you! Your letters became a part of my days! Now in my thoughts always only one question - "When I will get an opportunity to read your letter and to write my?"... And when I hear a favorite phrase: "Olga, you can jump, you has received the letter!" (A lady who works with a computer says exactly this phrase) I really become joyful very much and start to smile involuntarily. Therefore thank you!!! Today is a good day and to clinic I have come already with good mood. Today at night there was a little snowfall. In the morning I have come out to the street to jog and I have seen that all footpaths and roads completely are filled with snow. But I like such a weather. I like any weather. Many people do not notice beauty that surrounded them. In my soul such a weather wakens the big energy and fine mood.
I like all seasons. I like autumn. Yellow leaves, gold trees. It is so wonderful to walk in the park and to listen to how leaves rustle under feet; to see the clouds that float in the sky, to see birds departing to the warm lands.
And at night the sky begins to cry. The rain knocks on windows and roofs. A lightning illuminates for shares of second the empty streets. It is wonderful.
How it would be wonderful in such a weather to appear with beloved in a small room with a warm fireplace; weak light and singing of a cricket. How you think Fernando? What can be finer than romantic evening in rainy day? I at all do not know what season I like more. Russian winter is delightful. The all world around is white. And falls of snow bewitches, especially in the evening. When you see flows of light from a window, and on a background of black sky small snowflakes are similar to stars. And if for a long time you look at the sky, then it seems that you are flying through these wonderful snowflakes towards something unknown. I like spring. The world as though is born again. Air is filled with freshness. All troubles and failures thaws together with snow. The sounds of the baby birds chirping for the first time. Summer is a fine mood, the desire to learn the world, to have a rest and enjoy life. I feel that I
By the way, I jog for many years. I really have good health because I always try to support my figure and I jog every morning. I try to spend time in the air as much as possible. I have no car and I use transport extremely seldom. I get contrast shower - alternation of a stream of cold and hot water.
I since the childhood lived in conditions of cold winter and damp autumn. Such climate is toughening health very well. I do not smoke. I really love a healthy way of life. And I am proud of it. I love sports very much. Though should admit that I never played golf, football and basketball, never boxed. But I could surprise you, if I had opportunity to compete with you in beach volleyball. By the way, when I studied at university, I visited section of swimming and have reached good results. Some times I participated in swim competitions. Swimming - till now my favorite kind of sports.
Fernando, I send my pictures. I hope you will like it. I for a long time thought and have decided to send a picture - only for you... So, this picture really only for you! I hope you understand... I have to finish.With the best regards and with thoughts of you.
Hi, Fernando! How is your mood? I hope that up to my letter your mood was fine, but after my letter your mood became superfine (smile) Likely I am too self-confident. But I am happy if I receive your letter.
I so waited for this minute,- when I can write to you. Our friendship became the important part of my life, and I hope that in your life as well. Sometimes I understand that the thread that connects me with you now is not most strong.
But I do not want this thread to be torn. Right now I sit and I smile simply because I am glad that again I can to share with you my thoughts. Sometimes I so want you to see my smile during the similar moment because I think it is the most sincere smile! But sometimes my smile leaves me because I know that now the only thing that connects us is our thoughts, that we send to each other,- thoughts, transformed into a letters that are not able to show all depth of thoughts. But at the same time I understand that nobody knows what waits for us in the future. I hope my words do not offend you and maybe you even think just as I...
Tomorrow difficult day waits for me. Probably tomorrow I will work outside of clinic. We call it - "the ride working day". Elvira also goes with us. She already is completely healthy and begins work. It is difficult day. At this day several doctors and specialists of our clinic are going on the special medical bus to various remote small settlements, small villages in a thicket of the forest. These are poor villages which are located far away from the big cities and settlements. In these villages there are no doctors and clinics and people cannot visit clinic at any moment. In such villages there is always a lot of people who need the doctor but cannot reach clinic by self. Often it is a people who are not able to live without help of other people, - basically are small children or old and weak feeble people. We go in these villages on the bus with all necessary equipment. People in these villages love us and wait more than anything. But it is really the hard work if to take into account that we are going there at 6 am, and we come back sometimes even after 10 pm! But I will wait your letter because our friendship gives force to me, and our dialogue is a rest for my soul! My dear friend Fernando! I have to go!
Sincerely and with thoughts about you.
Hi my dear Fernando! Today is a fine day. Already in the morning I knew that I today I will get an opportunity to write to you. And all the rest become unimportant for me. Today I really haven't opportunity to write much. Please forgive me. But I have enough time to tell to you that I thought of you and waited when I will get opportunity to write you.
When I have read your letter about me, I did not know what to tell.
I simply sat and was quiet. I tried to realize all that you have written.
And I do not know how to explain you all what I have felt after your letter. For me it is even not the poetry but much more. I thought that only a fine angel from the sky is worthy of such words. I thought that only the dream embodied to a certain image can be described by such magic words. I have no words. I cannot believe that all that you have told, you have told about me. I never thought that in the world there is a man who could say so about me because I never thought that I am worthy of such words. But you have told it to me and I have no words. If it is words of your heart, if it is shout of your soul, I want you to know that these words now in my heart. I want you to know that your magic words hypnotized my imagination and reason, my heart and my feelings. I feel like a flower in droughty desert upon which a small cloud have suddenly poured out some drops water that saves the life. Thanks for your words. These words will live in my heart eternally.
I try to answer all your questions. I apologize if I missed something.
What question I have not answered?
And I have time to tell the main thing. I do not know why, but today I have woken up earlier than usually. I could not fall asleep again. I simply sat near window and looked at the sky. Suddenly, a small birdie appeared on my window. It was very beautiful birdie. This birdie looked at me, and started to twitter. It was so unusually and beautifully. It was a beautiful song. I looked at this small birdie and thought, that you Fernando now somewhere far away; maybe you sleep and see me in your sleep-dream. And I so wanted you to see this small birdie and to hear her delightful song. And I have whispered: "Fly off, my little birdie, fly to my friend Fernando, and tell to him that one girl, that is so far away, thinks of him and sends to him this song. And at this moment the birdie has flinched and flew away as if this birdie has heard my words! And I have thought, if today you Fernando will see a small birdie singing beautiful song, - be sure that it is my birdie I sent to you! Forgive me, but I have to go. I want to send you my kiss if you do not mind.
Hi Fernando! Your letter means so much for me. Thank you. I so wait for your letters and so demanded to learn that you will tell to me.
I understand your request to call you from phone and I too very much wish to hear your voice. But I have no phone at home and phone on work has only internal connection. This telephone line is connected to the Volgograd center of telecommunication and central hospital in Volgograd, but we have no telephone lines for the international connection. But I think that you can try to call in the central hospital in Volgograd. Then you should ask to connect you with rural clinic in Log. This call achieves on phone my boss. Then you should ask to invite the doctor of the dentist. It is me. I one dentist in clinic.
I do not know that the code you need to call to Russia from other country but number central hospital in Volgograd (8442) 67-33-80. I will wait your call.
The best time to call, from 8 A.M. till 5 P.M. I work this time. I live in the third time zone. We have Moscow time. If you know what is the time difference between Moscow and your city it is our difference.
Fernando, today I write to you with special worry but as well with pleasure and hope. I really hope that everything that I will tell you today will make you happy. Last time when I wrote you my honest letter I had the big sadness in my heart, and even though I tried to not show it, I think you have noticed it. Fernando, I was sad because the boss informed me that approximately in three weeks the accounting department will be closed for full re-equipment and repair. And when he have told me it, I thought my heart will stop, because when it will take place, I will not be able to communicate with you during several months! And it has brought infinite sadness into my heart. But after my boss informed me about close of accounting department, the accounting department informed me that approximately in three weeks I will get my vacation! When I thought that I can lose you for some months, inside my soul I at once have felt that I can't simply accept it. And I have felt that together with sadness in my heart has appeared an other feeling - feeling of confidence, desire to make new steps instead of simply waiting for something. I have understood that our relations are important for me much more than I thought.
And it so wonderfully. I had no vacation for two years. And now I will have vacation. But a thoughts that I will not be able to communicate with you, to receive your letters and to write mine,- all these thoughts has brought a pain to me, pain that I can't endure. I talked with Elvira and she has asked me what I think to do. And when she has asked me it, I have understood that inside my soul I already know the answer to this question. And I have told that I do not want to spend such a long-awaited vacation in loneliness. I can't accept a thought that I will not talk to you Fernando during of month or two. And I have told that I want to meet you Fernando! I have told her that I want to spend my vacation with you Fernando! I can come to you, and we can spend time together if you want. And first I was afraid that if I will tell you about it in the letter, you will write me that you do not want to see me or can not meet me.
And it would hurt my heart. But Elvira have told, that you Fernando and I are such a good friends, our relations are built on sincerity, therefore Fernando will be happy to spend time with me. And I really think that it would be delightfully. So, what you will say, Fernando, if I will offer you a meeting?
Would you be happy to see me and to spend with me several days? I cannot imagine at all how it would be wonderful. You would show me your life, we would learn each other in a real life. We would look into the eyes of each other, we could hold our hands, tell each other silly stories, laugh and tease each other, watch the stars in the night sky and have romantic evening, go to the movie or we could simply sit on a bench in the park, and who knows what else we could do together... I would be happy to do all this together with you, instead of again be lonely without you and our friendship. I simply want to meet you. I already knew and I have been told earlier, but I have found out again all I need to do to come to your country. I already have the passport. And I will avoid usual procedure of visa's approval. Being the doctor, I can ask the visa on behalf of our Ministry of Health, because if the applicant have good official support from official bodies, if the applicant have official recommendations and directions to various sorts of conference, seminars, - it will relieve of necessity to wait for some months the decision of the commission, and will remove all problems connected with necessity to prove that the purpose of travel is not emigration. Being the doctor I will have support and guarantees from Ministry of Health of Russian Federation, and it is certainly the best guarantor. Of course I must visit improbable quantity of the departments, to collect improbable quantity of documents, to find as many as possibly of other official legal persons, institutions and people for support; to get petitions. But if I will quickly collect all necessary documents, I will get the visa in one or two weeks! So I have filed an application for the visa, Fernando, with happiness and with hope that you will be happy to spend some days with me! I do not ask you about anything. I will use my monetary savings and I will make everything by self. It is my vacation and I will not be a burden. Would you be happy to spend some days with me soon, Fernando? Anyway, we must meet. It is possible to wait eternally. But I believe that I will get my vacation not accidentally; and I believe that the accounting department will be closed at the same time not accidentally as well. It is not coincidence! It is time to make a choice, to make the decision, to take new step. Maybe such opportunity will not be repeated again. I so long waited my vacation and I want my vacation to be especial. What can be better than a meeting of two friends?
The first meeting. It is simply delightful and I thank destiny that I have got such an opportunity,- an opportunity to meet my dear friend, the opportunity to learn each other in real life, the opportunity to enjoy time which we can spend together. And I believe that it can become the beginning of something new in our lifes and in our relations. And I am really happy to get a vacation because it is time which I can spend in any way I want, and I want to spend this vacation with you Fernando! So what will you tell? Would you like to spend time with me? Would you be glad to meet me? Would you be happy to have the first meeting at your airport? I will wait for your answer with pleasure. Your sincere Olga.
Hi my Fernando! I waited for your letter with fear and with pleasure at the same time! And I am very happy to receive your letter! I am ready to jump and dance, laugh and sing songs! And the reason - you Fernando! Thank you for your letter and your thoughts.
Every day I think - what my friend Fernando will tell me today, what mood he will have today? And as soon as I get free minute, I rush to accounting department to find out if you have written to me or not. And when I receive your letter, I start to smile from ear to ear anticipating the best time of my day - time when I read your letter and when I write to you the all my thoughts.
These are the most important minutes of my day. And these minutes I don't hear anything and I don't see anything except of lines and paragraphs which in my mind will be transformed into small movie, movie about you, my dear Fernando.
And you cannot imagine at all how it wonderfully! Sometimes I think, what would be if I have not found the boldness in myself to write you? What would be if I didn't believe that I can find a man in such a way? I always want to think that I the courageous woman, but I feel that actually it is not so. I am ready to give my life for the sake of person who are close and dear for me, I am ready to donate my well-being for the sake of well-being of other person but when I think of myself, I often become timid and all my boldness disperses like the fire's smoke. I am often afraid to make something, to take some step simply because of fear that it will be an incorrect step. I am often afraid to ask people about anything simply because of fear to get the negative answer. Not always, but it happens. What would happen, if you have not answered my first letter? Nothing would happen! And grey monotonous days again would lie on a way of my life by infinite impenetrable veil. Do you want to know what I did today?
First off, I should tell that I slept with a smile on my face! At least when I have woken up and have looked at the mirror, I have noticed that I smile! Then, I cleaned a teeth and I had smile! Then, I jog and I smiled as if actually I watched funny movie. Then, I have cooked a breakfast and drank a coffee with a smile on my face! Then, I have come to clinic, and I could not hide my smile. I was ready to laugh and I at all had no desire to work! It is a very bad symptom for the doctor! (Smile). Everything around have seemed to me a beautiful and wonderful. And even the severe boss, when have seen that I look at him and I smile, he began to survey himself attentively and even have come near to the mirror to see if anything wrong! He has thought that something wrong with his clothes! All the day I work with smile on my face! Elvira looks at me and smiles as well. Of course she understands the reason, and it makes her happy as well!
And when time of sleep will come, I will lie in my bed with the same smile on my face! And if you till now have not understood why I smile, I will tell you!
I smile because I think of you, Fernando! And it brings joy! I am so happy that I have in my life such a man as you! Thank you that you are in my life! I have to go. Now I will not have a lot of time after work because after work I will have one more working day! (Smile). You may ask what I mean? The preparation for my trip! You cannot imagine at all how many deals I must do for our meeting! I even have asked the boss to reduce my working day or to allow me to take some hours off in the middle of day to make some things, because after 5 pm not all departments works! Of course now I should work in the days off to have more of free time at week-days. But thoughts about our meeting give me force and energy! I am sure that everything will be perfectly! I will wait your letter! Please, write me because I need your letters and support more than ever! Your Olga!
Hi My Fernando! Thank you for your letters. You became the most dazzling moment of my day! How I wish you saw how Elvira is happy that we will meet! She is sure that our meeting will make us happy. It is simply impossible to talk to her now! (Smile). She has now only one theme for conversation - you Fernando! She constantly asks about you, asks - what I will do together with you, she asks - what I will do at the airport, she asks - what I will cook for you. She asks how I am going to impress you, to intrigue! She even asks how I will tempt you!
(Smile). She say that I do everything correctly and I should not be afraid of anything at all. To conquer the road can only one who goes on this road. Elvira is very glad that I have found you, and she sends you her friendly greetings and a wishes of happy expectation of me! (Smile).
Fernando, please, don't be angry with me if I cannot write you much now. I hope you understand that I even after my working day in clinic must do too much for our meeting. Today I will go to Ministry of Health. I think this is one of the most important deals for me right now. Today I will give them the all my medical documents and tomorrow I will probably get all documents and forms of petitions which I must fill out as soon as possible. Then I will go to Army Garrison where were working my parents. They must collect for me all the information about my parents, about history of the death of my father and mother. I must have data about work of my parents not only in this Army Garrison, but also in all others Garrisons where my parents worked during all life. To make it extremely difficultly, if to take into account that my parents worked in Army Garrisons in various points of our huge country. But I am sure that I will get the information because here many officers who remember my father, and I hope they will be glad to help me. Fernando, today I feel that I start to worry more than I even could imagine. I am very glad that I do all this. And I think of our meeting every minute. The meeting at the airport... I don't think that many people on our planet have an opportunity to enjoy such a delightful moment - the moment of the first meeting at the airport. It is so beautiful. I feel that it will be very touching moment for each of us. I never travelled so far away. And I worry very much. But I imagine us together and it calms me down. I see us together, I see us walking in the park; I see us speaking about serious and about silly things, or playing cards or a checkers (and the one who lose will execute any desire of the winner (smile)), I see wonderful dinners at home and outside! I see you sitting on a sofa with a juicy peach in your hand and I see me dancing in front of you beautiful dance, or maybe even erotic dance (smile), how about Belly dance? (Smile). I do it stunningly!(Smile). I see us swimming; I see us on a roof of a house, watching the full moon; I see us fighting by pillows; I see us in the evening at home, with romantic light of candles; I see us cooking together Russian pelmenies and American pizza (smile); I see me in your embraces. All this waits for us in the near future; and I enjoy, anticipating this delightful time together! Do you feel the same, Fernando? Fernando, would you like to give me massage of my back? I would like to give you massage! But I must warn you, that if you want to give me massage, you should not touch my ribs!(Smile) The reason - I the most ticklish woman in Russia(smile). Fernando, I madly am afraid of titillation! If someone tickles my foot or ribs, I begin to laugh loudly, to kick and to scratch, to squeal and to jump! Therefore if you will give me massage and you will tickle me, you will feel like a cowboy on a wild undomesticated mare on the rodeo! (Smile). By the way, Fernando, are you ticklish? Do you snore? (Forgive me for this question. Do not answer, if you do not want. Maybe one day I will find out all this all the same! (Smile). Will you sing serenades for me? I would be happy if you would sing serenades and songs for me! I would remunerate you by kisses! (Smile). Fernando, I should finish the letter. I must do much so that you had an opportunity to give me massage and to get the massage from me! (Smile). Please, write me because now I need you and your letters very very strongly, because I worry so much...
Hi my dear Fernando! Every morning I wake up with a pleasant thought of our meeting!
And each new day reduces distance between us! Every new day makes us closer to each other. I so hope that we will meet. Fernando, I the doctor, but I cannot think of anything except of our meeting!(Smile). Even my patients have noticed it!
Fernando, Elvira say that last time she saw me such a happy many years back - when I was the student girl! She asserts that you have changed me absolutely! I began often to get my hairbrush and to correct my hairstyle!
(Smile). I began often to sing songs aloud! (Smile). I began often to immerse into the world of fantasies so, that sometimes I at all don't hear someone talks to me or asks me about something! (Smile). It is so amusingly, pleasantly and unusually! She is very grateful to you and very glad that we will meet!
She helps me by all possible ways. Fernando, do you remember in my very first small letter I have told that I want to find a man who will compel my soul to blossom? I want to tell you, that my soul blossoms! You have brought a spring into my soul and now I feel like a flower blossoming under long-awaited beams of the warm sun! Thank you Fernando! Fernando, you cannot imagine what tense time I have now. I actually haven't even one free minute. I already was in Ministry of Health and I got all petitions! It is great! In the Ministry I have been told that I must visit all patients which I visit on a "Trip Day"- they must fill up forms of petitions for me. Of course they will be happy to do it.
These people love me and all doctors who visits them! It will be a big support for me. The Ministry will make the report about my work in the difficult places where not each person is ready to work. I also will get the report and the characteristic from my clinic. Tomorrow I and Elvira will have our own "Trip Day"! We will go together to those settlements. Probably we will go there not only tomorrow but also the day after tomorrow because the one day is not enough to visit all people who knows me. After that I must legalize all documents at the notary. Elvira will help me to get the full report about my biography in Municipal Department. If Elvira will be able to agree with them, they will get for me the information about me and my family from all Municipal Departments of those regions where I and my parents lived during all life. By self we would never get all this information. I get tired very much not only spiritually, but physically as well. And when I come home, I simply fall onto a bed, and I simply lie on a bed some time looking at a ceiling. But if we will do everything quickly, I will have interview with the commission. After this interview the commission will inform me if my visa is approved or not. Tomorrow I will have also consultation - preparation for interview. It is very important point for me as well! Maybe I worry too much, but I cannot calm myself! Forgive me that I write to you about my cares. But I really worry. I knew that I must do much for our meeting, but I at all could not assume that I will worry. Elvira says that if she would be on my place, she would become confused and simply would not know what to do. She says that she envies my endurance and the power of will. I never told her,- but actually I often feel fear, I often feel like weak woman. I really need moral support. I since the childhood make all decisions by self, and my parents taught me never to show weakness or confusion. And I always tried to do without anybody's help or advice, even though in my heart I often feel like very weak woman. Fernando, are you the leader in relationship with woman? Do you like to make the decision by self?
P.S. Fernando, please tell me again the name and the code of the International Airport up to which I must fly!!! I must be sure, that I have the correct information.
Hi Fernando! How I am glad that I have an opportunity to write you. My dear Fernando! I have bad news! I became the drug addict! And my drug - you Fernando! (Smile). I have a little time. I has come here only to write you some lines. I haven't even one free minute. Now the each minute of my day is devoted to you Fernando! Every minute of my day I use to make our meeting come true.
Every minute of my day I think of you and about our meeting. I give off all my diligence and forces to meet you.
I will ask the friends concerning your request. But they badly know English language, practically do not know. Sorry.
At once I want to tell that I have collected almost all characteristics and petitions from people. Now I will have a meeting with the notary at notary office to legalize all documents. Elvira was able to agree with Municipal Department. Now she must get all documents about my family and me. Of course contrary to my expectations not all people are unselfish, but the main thing is that we will get these documents. The rest is not the most important. I already had consultation - preparation for interview. I so worry. I so want to put my head onto your knees and to feel your warm hand on my face. For the sake of it I am ready to give off all my forces! And Elvira gives all her forces for our meeting. Last night Elvira has come to my home and she have suggested to bake a cake,- simply to relax after difficult day. We have together invented the new recipe and have started to make a cake. I wish you saw this cake! There is not on the Earth any cake with such a quantity of components! (Smile). Between of layers of a soft gentle biscuit we placed mush of kiwi and bananas. The sour cream with a strawberry and juice of fresh lemon have turned into a magnificent cake-cream. We have decorated a cake with a cherry, and when we already wanted to try our cake, we have suddenly understood that we forgot to give a name for our pie. I do not know if in your country there is such a tradition, but in Russia each cake have the name, like - "Butterfly", or "Napoleon" or "Ruins Of Graph's Castle". So we began to look attentively at our cake, and to think,- what name this cake must have. Elvira began to offer various names - "Cinderella" or "Autumn Charm". But I said that all this is banal and too ordinary. There is millions cakes with similar names. Then she has offered the name - "Dancing Elephant" or "Fallen Gymnast "! I have asked her - why "Fallen Gymnast"? And she has answered that it is unusually, and in any country of the world I never would find a pie with the similar name ! (Smile). But I said that it is too foolishly! Elvira offered tens of names, but to each her offer I answered that it is too foolishly, or too banal, or too ordinary, or it is not interesting.
Finally Elvira has told: "All right Olga, if you are so clever, maybe you will offer anything not banal, unusual, not foolish and interesting?" And then I have told: "Look at this cake! This cake is appetizing just as Fernando!!!! I want to name this cake - Fernando!" (Smile). I wish you saw Elvira during that moment! She has fallen onto a floor and began to laugh loudly! I could not stop her at all! She has told: "Olga, you are absolutely crazy Russian woman, but I love the name Fernando!!!! "(Smile). We together laughed loudly all the evening, we drank tea and ate a delightful cake with the name Fernando!!!
(Smile). I hope you are not offended that I have named a cake by your name? It is a beautiful, sweet, gentle, and very tasty cake!!! Fernando, I have to go. I hope you dream and think of me as often as I think of you! (Smile). Please, write me the letter! I beg you, do not forget about me now! (Smile) Please, tell me that you wait for me with impatience (smile). Please, tell me that you are dreaming to embrace me at the airport! (Smile) Fernando, if some lady would want to be with you while your beloved woman don't see you, what would you tell that lady? Forgive me, I have to go. But only because I want to meet you as soon as possible!!!!(smile).
Hi my Fernando! Thank you for your letters. I am so happy. Thoughts about you calm my heart. You don't know how all your words are important for me. I know what emotion you write me with, and your emotions caress my heart. And I know hundreds of words, that could help me to tell you how you are important, dear and wonderful for me. And I so wait for that a moment when I will be able to tell you these all words, at the same time looking into your eyes. I so wait for that a moment when I will see your smile and I will read in your smile all your thoughts. And now my heart enjoys fine feeling - feelings of waiting and hope that soon our meeting will come true. And sometimes it is simply impossible by means of only words to express all shades of joy. Any words cannot replace a glance and a smile, any words are not able to replace tenderness of touch.
I will tell you something good! If you would see how I worry. But I waited for this news for a long time. And I cannot imagine at all how I will worry the following some days! Anyhow, today I finally got the invitation! I will have the interview with the commission! It is the most important point for me. I prepared to this for a long time. After I will have interview I will find out the final decision! The commission will inform me their decision, and then you and I will know if we will meet or not. I don't want to say "IF", but it is really a very difficult and tense moment. And I am simply not sure if I will have confidence and self-control. But I have to calm down myself. My worry - our enemy. I think I am ready. I feel that I can do and tell everything correctly, and we will meet! You should be with me in your thoughts. Without you I so am afraid! I have almost all documents which should impress the commission. I hope that everything what I have made will help us. Please, tell me that you believe in it. Be with me in your thoughts. I hope nothing bad will happen to me anymore. And I am happy that Elvira and I didn't get any traumas today. I cannot imagine at all what would be in this case. But I am ok, and it is most important. I will think of you, so please, think of me as well. With all my tenderness. Your Olga.
P.S. I asked Elvira to make a special photo for you. I put it with this letter. I feel like a "mischievous child" who teases you. Do not be angry at me.
Hi, my Love.
I even do not know what to tell first. I simply hope that you will be happy!
The most important, finest news - I did it! I got the visa! I am very happy!!!!
I as well have found out that I will get vacation April, 13 2012.
I have been to the company that reserves airway tickets. I asked them how I can reach Phoenix and how much it costs. They have offered to me the roundtrip ticket that costs $1429 USD. I asked them to find cheapest ticket, because this price is expensive for me. They have answered that they have a cheaper roundtrip ticket and the beginning of the flight April, 18 2012.
It costs $1038 USD. It was the best variant for me. I asked them to reserve a ticket.
But they refused, because they can't reserve the ticket without advance payment.
I must pay full cost. I have asked if I can pay a part of money now, and the other part later. They have told that it is possible, but I will be limited by term.
And if I will not pay the full cost of the ticket within of this term, I will lose already nested money. I have agreed because it is the only chance for me, because I must give to anti-emigration committee a data about my payment. By this moment I had only the concrete sum of money which I had after all my expenses.
I paid $ 634 USD. But it was not enough for them. In a panic, all what Elvira and I could do - we pawned our earrings and gold rings and I got $ 94 USD.
That is all I could do. The number of the flight on which I will get the ticket is Aeroflot-Russian Airlines 106
The time of departure from Moscow is 1:00pm. The time of arrival in Phoenix is 7:18pm.
I will change a plan in Los Angeles (LAX), number of the flight US Airways 1514.
After this I will fly to Phoenix (Sky Harbor Intl.), to you.
I know that probably I simply must tell that I can't come to you because I haven't the remaining sum. I know that I promised to do all by self, and I was sure that I can. I did not want to ask you. But after I did everything I did, I cannot simply tell that I will not come to you. I have passed through so many difficulties, and I have overcome the most difficult. But all the same I have disgusting feeling that I could not fulfill the promise. I am always ready to do all what is possible,- to fulfill my promises, but at the same time I understand that any person could get in such a situation.
To get the visa I have spent much more money than I expected. But people were ready to help me only if I will pay them. I paid more than 400 dollars to get all documents, I paid in municipal committee, in the ministry. Even officers in army garrison have compelled me to pay for their help. I did not expect all this, but up to the last moment I was sure that I still can make everything. I expected that I can get a vacation payment. We get a vacation payment after ending of a vacation.
I asked to give me this money now because I need this money urgently. But, at the last moment I have got the answer that I can get this money urgently only in case of serious illness or for example in case of death of the relative. I feel so guilty. I was sure that nothing can prevent our meeting.
But I must pay remaining sum. It is $ 380 USD. And I must pay money before April, 6, evening. Otherwise I will lose my nested money and our jewelry will be sold out simply in vain. I know that I should not ask you, and I am very ashamed to do it. And maybe I really simply had to tell you that I can't meet with you because I could not provide my travel completely. But I cannot simply refuse our meeting because then all my diligence, forces, nerves, means will be spent in vain. I understand that for you it is too big sum to lend me. You are not obliged to help me. And 400 dollars which I have spent to get the visa, and 728 $ that I have given for the ticket are huge money for me. But I want you to know that I have given everything not for the sake of myself, but for the sake of us, for the sake of you and me. And I was happy all this time. If you want to meet me, to help me to make our meeting, please, send money to the help before April, 6, evening. I want you to be confident in my sincerity, that is why I send you the scanner of my visa. I want you to see the result of my efforts.
I address to you only because I need it right now, because the anti- emigration committee waits for me with all documents and I am obliged to come to committee according to appointed term.
I do not know if you can to help me. But I have no other exit. I need you.
If you can help me I will tell you what I have found out. Elvira said that you can help me with the help of remittance system. So I have addressed to the nearest bank the agent ''Western Union''. I have been told that they use the system ''Western Union''. They have told that it is very convenient office for me; and this system works always and reliably. I give you necessary elements for sending money with the help of ''Western Union'':
The name of bank: AVANGARD BANK
CITY - Volgograd
STREET - Geroev Stalingrada, 40
ZIP - 400026
for SHISHCINA OLGA.
In bank I have been told, that to get the money, I must tell to employee of bank your full name, your full address, exact sent sum and the confidential number - Money Transfer Control Number (MTCN). You will get this number in your bank if you will send your help. Only with presence of all this information I can get your help.
I do not know what answer I will get from you. I very much am afraid that you will not help me. But I want to tell, that I really need you, and I simply can't endure the thought that I did almost everything, but I will not meet you. I understand that it is big money. I have given all my forces, but together we are stronger. I really ask you to help me. I will give you back all your money at the earliest opportunity.
I have written you honestly and sincerely. Are you with me?