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Letter(s) from Oksana Lebedeva to Julian (UK)
Hello, Julian, but i thought that you answer me with photos too i'm single now and i tired from it. i saw that you are single too and i think that you tired from loneliness too? maybe............... At once i want to explain you that i live in Russia now. but i used dating site because i wanted to meet man out of Russia. it is impossible to find man in Russia. because here 1 single man for 6 single women!!! and you can present how it is hard to search.......... I hope that you understand me. I wouldn't like to begin dialogue with the reticence or doubts... And I am ready to moving... I thought about it very much. But I would like to get acquainted at first I live in city PESTRAVKA... I'm 36 years and i don't have children ... but i work with children. i'm doctor pedeatrician I speak English without problems. I love sport, Julian.... I'm like run sometimes! i runs 1-2 times in week . :)some to some. it would be perfect if you like some sport too now i will worry so much because i will must wait your answer :-))) i fear to be refused but i give you chance for you... and i hope to get chance from you too......... Oksana with kisses........
Hello Julian! yes i want to continue with you!!!!! i LOOOVE your photo!!! BUT it is probable.. PLEASE LISTEN ME...... I have been in Uk. it was more 9 years ago... yes. I had practic trip and i had it with university group... WE shouldn't worry about distance. i and you live in new century. I am interested in you really I search only for serious relations which develop gradually... I "was broken" in relations earlier. BROKEN - it is really right word........ I would like to know the man before 1 meeting now... But you don't speak about yourself much... And I tried to speak more... But you have only 1 question to me... are you uninteresting to me? I am in Russia now... I have simply decided to try, risk to search for the relation out of Russia... I have bent for to it... And it is nearby But I was afraid to try earlier... But I have despaired already and I am ready on any step, Julian! I'm child's doctor and i work 6 days in week..... yes... I'm very impressionable woman. you probably already see... :) I really love sport some to some... but I use sport to have my physical form... :) I said you so much yet, and i share with you about my private life and experience. I hope that you will be able to tell more about you... What can you tell about your work, family and the city, about your interests? I would like to hope that you write more for me tomorrow... please... It would be more questions for me and say me MORE about you. :) Ok? :) Or you can break me like the next man in my life... I would like to read your letter more than some seconds... please... :) I am interested... I hope that you too... yours, with KISS Oksana
Julian! Hello! you are handsome and so positive on a photo!!! I love it... I was afraid that you wouldn't give a photo plus ok...i give you photos of my job..i'm child's doctor and i give you photos of my city... and my house plus Church's monument. :) give me your photos too... ok? and I begin to have faith that I'll be back for sure to see your letter tomorrow. I believe that it is possible that something in the future! I really enjoyed reading your answer to my last letter, I just hope that you reading my letter and you doesn't take much time to understand and answer Julian... Tell me if you are glad or not. :) Good? I think that you should know more about my city. I promised to say about it... I live in the city PESTRAVKA... about 1000 km to Moscow. my city probably doesn't have big differences from the other provincial Russian cities. Many trees, clean air, and some strange people... :) yes... I'm talking about the traditions and special accent, Julian :) I hope that you understand correctly.... :) There is no special attractions... unless the monuments from the Soviet Union, which is in every Russian city:). but if the monuments are same - is it interesting? what do you think? I think the Champs Elysees, Eiffel Tower - it sights! Big Ben... Westminster Abbey ok okok.... Julian, I would like to know more about your sport hobbies! "possible? :) I love snow . I tried to rise on snowboard even! :):) but I like ski more after snowboard... I fell many times!!!! I will remember it long time :)! we are with my friends go to the fitness centre.... I said that i exercise sport to keep my forms... but you can love another sport?? :) perhaps you also have special sports hobbies with friends plus??? Perhaps you should understand that I feel loneliness now..... maybe even my feelings to give you a little bit.... Just love! it is beautiful and simple feeling, not it is? but it isnt so easy to reach and find again unfortunately........ I'm trying.... I want to say that I always think of you. and it is easier for me and better now please say me more too kisses to you
Hello.. Hello dear Julian, it is so sweet message and photos from you! so perfect day for me now!!!! friday today... You have holiday tomorrow or? i work tomorrow... eh but tomorrow I will have the short working day. it is ok. :) please dont angry to my english... i will try, i forgot so much... I only hope that your words will become sweeter and softer to me every day! I would be glad if you also constantly told me about your inner feelings, thoughts ... I tell you, and I feel good inside, quietly ... I wish that you could feel it too! :) it's very important ... and for me it's important to know about your past relationships ... I just want to know why you're lonely now ... what about me, I already had a serious and very serious relationship ... but it failed .. it continues for 5 years... we lived together.. they loved the entertainment, often drinking alcohol. and I felt as lonely as it is now ... My last relationship continued less 4 months. but when he realized that I think about the family in the near future, he abandoned me ... I do not understand the purpose and meaning of life such men .... and internet relations ... I tried starting a conversation with two men before, but it was a mistake ... I understood that they were looking for short relationships ... and they were rude in their words sometimes ... In general, I hope to get around is all my mistakes ... I need a man who would retain the strength of our relationship under any circumstances. I need a man who would love me sincerely. Only then will I be able to build a serious relationship with this man. And it must be good luck! :-) You have a very different man and I have a wonderful feeling inside from communicating with you .... but what do you think about it? or can you have your own conclusions from your personal life? but I am interested to know more about the reasons of your loneliness Julian. my dad is going through because of my loneliness ... He said I shouldn't repeat his past mistakes ... He says that if you don't have love, you don't live ... perhaps he heard these words somewhere ... but I think that sounds right at 100 PERCENTS.... Julian, what do you think? I wrote this letter to his thoughts, which I think for many months and maybe years. Write me about your past successes or failures .... What do you think about it? I hope that you will answer me. It's very important to me ... I hope that you have important things too .... this is important! :-) ...... in waiting again ...... :-)
Hello!!!!!! your saturday is ok? I worked.... but the working day is already finished. tomorrow holiday!!! and i can sleep very very big time today :) i'm 170 sm, 57 kg. is it ok for you? I understand you... But I am assured that we should to trust in happiness!!! The loneliness cannot be eternal. And we should use each chance for love now. Otherwise I am afraid to remain lonely always... I like ,you say sincerely me about yourself ... I love it! I love when a man wants one woman in his life ... I love when my man will give me only positive emotions! I love that you want a constant relations ... I'm pleased that you're talking just are interested in a conversation with me .... yes!!! :) really it make me better but I want to say that I'm waiting for your questions every day, your interest to me ..... :) So you can talk about everything to me! ok, Julian?? By the way I told you about my father is a bit ... I would like to hear about your relatives a little more, if you can and want to tell ... I can only add my father that now he isn't alone ... He met a woman several months ago and lives with her ... no no ... He met her before last New Year. This means more than a year has passed ... and I saw how my father changed ... He began to smile more often! Now he doesn't stay at work and always in a hurry home!! :):):) Yeeees ... she changed his life! :) I recently told him my weight! Dad started cursing me, and said that now when I live with him, I'll eat more:):) ... I told my dad that I care about my body! :) So I will not eat more even if father asked ... but I think he will understand me ... Julian, seriously .... Do you like when a girl is skinny or bigger form? :) I'm skinny... I don't know ... Just think about it ... I hope I make the ideal for you. :) i hope "yes" ...... I told my dad that I communicate with you and thati like you very much! :) my papa wished us luck in our relationship. :) my papa is a very kind and good! You can tell that you have received approval or even the blessing of my father! " :):):) That's nice .... I hope that you will answer me soon. maybe even a few hours or even minutes? I would be happy to see again your news!! I embrace you. Kissses
Hello, I had a pleasant Sunday's dream. :) and you? i have good mood now Yes. I have removed a profile on a site. Because many men wrote to me. And some men had inadequate requests for naked photos!!!! And I wrote to you already... I have decided to remove a profile. I have a terrible feeling of loneliness during every free moment .. and you? or i can feel it only... your letter gave pleasure always... now I dont feel loneliness I'm beginning to understand that you are interested in me really... It make me happiest because I'm also very interested in you! I don't even know that I would feel if you suddenly get lost ... or if you say that we cant communicate ... It is very important to me ... If you have similar experiences, then I think that we can rejoice together ... Our communication will be valuable if we feel happy together .... if only I can feel it, I'll be very upset ... Julian, I dont want that you write me letters just for the make of occupation of free time ... because I hope that you'll have to take my heart! I hope so! :) but I still dont know much about you ... Of course it is impossible to tell all! :) Take many years to know the person completely ... but I'm already doing some of the findings ... and most importantly what you can already make me happy, when I talk to you when I am writing to you when I read your letters, my Julian.... I would like to have a lover man, feeling cared for and constant support in difficult times. I think to have a permanent footing and find the man. I think I on the right track to achieve my goals. I must trust the person with whom I am a lifetime. And trust his every word, gesture, sight, smile. In today's world because it is a lot of meanness and treachery. In this world you must have a loved one. We are far from each other. But this is not an obstacle to our dialogue. I hope that soon we can watch a movie or listen to quiet music ... By the way what films do you like?? do you love romantic movies?? I love ... also I love watching comedy ... the ideal of my film - it is "Ghost" ... it is a romantic film but also he is very good movie ... for me :) I am glad that we have special communication and I hope for the continue... I want to believe that one day we will be able to meet with you! :) Oksana ..
my sweet Julian.... Hello!!! i thought about us yesterday and now... i love homemade food.. and i love to cook.. i think that i can cook romantic supper... candles... evening.. it would be so perfect.. i cant think about it now, because i start to feel me so lonely... I have a favourite song... I give you a song... This song can becomes a song for our relations? I adore this song really! I am very pleased that I cant worry about the continuation of our relationship here ... I am very happy! I sent you some of my photos like I can cook :) . you can name these photos "my Oksana - good cook" :):):) I hope you like it!! I like fruits! I couldnt eat much tangerines in childhood ... here the fruit was almost non-existent ... but I remember ... I was waiting for New Year's Day ever, and then my father bought a tangerine! so the fruit was always a holiday for me, literally! you love fruits too, Julian? I love art, love poetry and literature, and music. I try to go to art exhibitions possible time ... I love it... it is life in pictures ... I'm sure I like the group Modern Talking from childood.. My dad always listened to music Modern Talking. it was a protest against the Soviet Union, because it was illegal to listen to foreign music in those days .... Maybe I like this music by this reason! :) Yes, I would like to tell you a little about my childhood. When I was a child, I learned a lot from my dad, from my friends. I am grateful to my dad for what he has brought me so what I am .... I believe that my childhood was happy, despite the fact that I was brought up only Dad. I'm glad that it was my dad trained me. sometimes I miss my mom, but it was earlier. Happy memories of my childhood will forever be in my heart .... What can you tell me interesting things about your childhood? I want to tell you what I feel grand interest in you plus and plus. our communication is very positive influence on me, I'm very happy! I have already said .... it is difficult to explain... but I'm happy that I decided to find and i found you:) I will gladly wait your answer plus plus.... Oksana
Hello my Julian! :) Hello! dear I think about us now... I am afraid that you will hurt for me... Probably, it is my problem. I am afraid to be broken in relations again. What do you think of it? my sweet? it is amazing that we continue to communicate! Perhaps this could be more than words and letters. I hope .... Julian? did you like the music that I gave you??? I like this song. and i want that this song could be our song ... What do you think?? I listen to it whenever I write you a letter! Send me more photos, you know that I will love it too Today bad weather I love good weather! and I remember summer ...:) Therefore, I want to go to relax outdoors with friends. Do we relax near the River, we are taking a pleasurable dip, we make barbeque. But the most important c ' is collected in a narrow circle of friends around the fire, telling about the history, chatting and joking, singing with guitar. I love this tool music ... I love to sing. can you not gonna love my voice. But this is my mood always!!!! :) :) :) :) :) Wish you a nice day ;) hope that you will have a good time and send me a letter soon. Super big hug from me.. ;)
Hello my sweet Julian!!! How are you? ok or it is better??? :):) sweet music!!! i like you got photos... i sent photos with my friends... i hope you like it. and now i send new photos and photo from last Summer... my dear, you give me smile, when open my mail every time. I always think of you, I feel for you very warm feelings ... I can talk with you on any questions, I am very pleased that you want and you can be with me again!! I always think about you, your image doesn't go out from my head. I feel a great warmth in my heart when I think of you ... I am very pleased! :) I wanted to tell you important information. I can get my salary to my vacation. My vacation will start in 3-4 weeks as possible. I want to buy a new mobile phone at this money. but I really want now to talk with you by the phone. I hope you are well prepared for our telephone conversation? it would be great!!!!! I really want to hear your voice! :) I do not want to wait 3-4 weeks. do you understand dear? My friend gave me the correct solution. I can call to you from the payphone to your phone number! it turns like a much cheaper even ... if you leave me your full phone number, I could call to you from the payhone after a 4-5 days! is a great idea! good? :):) I want to hear your voice ... I want to see your pictures. I want to hope for your words every day .... Mmmmm, Julian .... My dear, I sent you the photos from last Summer ... I hope that it is possible to see .... :) i have a lot of thoughts in my head now ... it is the main idea - this is our meeting. I think that we still talk about it. You came into my heart as a bright knight who saved me from loneliness and the kingdom of my soul brought joy and happiness and always won my heart! You're like a streak of gray in my life. And now I can't imagine my life without you! I would like us to have our beatifull history"!! My dear, I'm really looking forward to your reply. I embrace you.
my heart Julian, I am upset... I waited your phone number. I wanted to call you today!!!! I wanted to tell HELLO MY SWEET!!!!!!!! :-( And you do not give your phone number. I very much wanted to hear you already :-( I give you my mobile. 79023147315 i check it... it is ok i wish to see your way of life, your family, your work, your leisure, It is very important for me..... I want to get meet with your close people and with your friends maybe. in my opinion, our meeting will be remarkable for you and me. I don't want to wait within long and painful months. I would like to meet you in the near future. My love, I don't accept any excuses and no reasons that we won't make our meeting! can understand me? If you not against, I allow to inform my imagination on our meeting... You imagine it, I will arrive to you! I will search for you in crowd of people, and I can't find you, for example! :-) After, I hear your voice... You speak me: "Oksanaaaaaa!" I will lift a sight, and I will see you. My heart is filled with happiness!!!!!! And in some seconds my emotions overflow me because I looked forward our meeting... You speak with me, and You ask me. And your smile upon the face!!!!!! - how was my flight? :-) You can would have a bouquet of any flowers, but it isn't very important!!!! The main thing - you would help to help with my luggage! lol only :) But certainly the main thing - your kiss!!!! And your strong embraces already!!!!!! I have already considered much. I want to make an evening supper!!! I would be cook a romatic supper. And you would try to find candles, to equip a place of a supper for us!!!! I hope, you have a few romantic too!!!!! What is your thoughts? I happy, if you want to embrace me too... I really don't know what to make. Really I don't have big economic means, I don't guarantee that it will be enough. It is necessary to use the best efforts, that we could be together. Anyway it is our meeting and we solve problems of the organisation of my trip... The organisation of our meeting is a general question for us. We should care about each other. Care - one of important things in relations. If there will be no trust and care then relations will not exist... You could ask some important questions about my arrival to you? Write your ideas, ok, my love? Oksana
my heart Julian.... but it will perfect.... i call you today you wait my calling, please. ok dear? i call you after 16.00 your time. i hope you will wait it is a perfect really. i do not have words... i want to talk with you. eh... i wait and now i sent new photos for you... but say me. maybe we don't need in this meeting? please say me... I WANT IT VERY MUCH without doubts!!!!!! yes dear!!! yes... EARLIER, I feared that you are some aggressive type of the man. It was my one fear... now I can tell you sincerely about it. I afraid only inexplicable aggression from men. and consequently I needed time that the nobility you. I am assured of you completely. you were pleasant to me at once. Our dialogue lifted my mood and my feelings!!!!!!!!!!! Therefore I am ready to meet. I didn't want, that our dialogue was dialogue on the Internet always. And I know that you searched only for serious relations! my heart! and i want our meet REALLY! i live by this idea now :-( i think it will can start for us... I write from here again... I tried to make email. But it was a problem. If you do not receive A mail from me, you tell me about it. ok? But you remember that I can write in the afternoon, but next day i can write you in the evening. ok my love? I try to know about our meeting. Again I should specify holiday. It would be from 2nd of SEPTEMBER. i hope this time. and I try to know about a trip. but i do not think that you think about it... i tired to be alone. and i find youuuuuuuuuuu. it make me so so so happy!!!!! you cannot understand if you do not feel it too... dear. i'm so sad really. i fear that you do not want and do not need in me too... :( really. i want to be with you. i see chance that we can have each other. and we do not have loneliness again... I miss. I worry to lose each other I wait to speak by phone today my dear!!!!! I embrace you
my love Julian,
Maybe you don't understand how I was happy after conversation... almost I meet a column by head in the street... :)
maybe you watched a film - "Good luck, Chuck"... it is a comedy with Jessica Alba... did you watch? :)
But I am not the full unlucky person. Usually I am accurate... But probably I have dreams... :)
i so feared to in love.. and i in love.. but i hope that you wouldn't break my heart.. i so happy now..and my birthday will soon on 5th of September...i hope that we can meet.. i hope...
I was glad to see your emotions and your desire. It gives powers for waiting of meeting ! Yes, my heart...
Today I went to travel agency to know everything concerning a trip to you dear, I going to arrive to this moment to Cardiff! I want to meet you as soon as possible!
I searched you during long time! I couldn't hope that I will find love again...
I'm 36... you know
My heart, I trust you and I want, that we would be happy!
Here - the most difficult to be without love.... When I will be with you - I will melt by love.
I have pure love to you! I can give you all.
Time went quickly, life is short and time for a meeting has come! I love you!
I have told you that I have knew about a trip to Cardiff, today I went to tourist bureau GOTOSUN to know about a trip....
I have signed the contract with tourist bureau,
Therefore I should pay for all services in advance.
The tourist bureau is reliable and they co-operate with embassy of UK in Moscow.
Now I know that the main documents for arrival to you is a visa and the passport, I will need payment of preparation of the passport and the visa, my heart...
visa, the passport and tickets are necessary for a full trip.
I asked about the prices for the visa, and you can see it
Registration of the visa cost - 65 euros, the passport for a trip abroad - 118 euros
The medical inquiry for insurance- 42 euros, the insurance - 120 euros
All expenses under the visa to make - 345 euros.
And still I will need residing at Moscow for 2-3 days.
Because I should get the visa personally and then fly to you already.
Residing cost together with food will be about 90 euros.
As I have counted, the general expenses will be- 435 euros.
The tourist visa will be valid within 90 days.......
The longest - visa registration will occupy till 7-8 days!!!
When I would pay 435 euros, visa will begin registration!
My heart, of cause I understand that probably you will angry to me :-(((
but I really don't know how i can find these fonds. I'm ashamed very much to you, to please these fonds from you. But my desire- to be together with you, it is stronger than pride. I want that our relations have continue.
my sweet Julian, I have told you everything that i wanted.... Now I must wait your answer.
It will be very sad, if we lose our relations or if we quarrel without the reason.
If you could solve it, I will try to ask the travel agency bank account.....
for me it is very sad now and it is a shame. But I believe that we will be together! I know that it happens. please, answer me soon......
with loooooooooove Oksana
Now I listen to our song from a film "Ghost" again... Again and again...
I write again Julian...... Excuse me, I am upset...
Only letter letters :(..... Certainly it is not enough....
I think that any person would feel it after long dialogue... Desire to be together!!!
I have about 120 euros. I took a debt from the girlfriend. I very much want to be with you...
You could pay 320 euros? dear? And I will try to ask the travel agency bank account. ok my love?
Yes I can take long vacation. But I will be ready to remain with you any time!!!
Because relations is is priority for me in life now.
I do not want to meet an old age in loneliness. And I want to have your strong shoulder always!!!!!
Now I was at home also I only looked at a wall....... I thought much... I had your letter yesterday!
But I very much wanted to see your letter again... I very much do not have dialogue through letters...
I have sensation but it is difficultly to explain......
How to explain??? hmmmmmm as though I eat a sweet pie and I can eat only a small slice.... You understand me, Julian... Darling.... We write letters and we think about the friend the friend constantly....
But I am afraid that you leave the Internet and forget about me... Though now I think that you think of me constantly :)!
How I can think of work, about meal? I cannot... The situation is awful for me... I am afraid that you do not think of me also, do not worry when I do not write...
But I write to you constantly! My desire huge...
I am afraid that you do not understand it and I am afraid that I for you am not a lot of important in life now.... But I would like I will achieve that a part of your life and you Will be a part of my life! The most part! A huge part!!!! I have many thoughts...
Every day I have hope that we will take the first step...... But the next day hope is less and less if is fair.... But I have made all that I can... But I reproach myself with that that I cannot make it independently... :(
Excuse me Julian if you feel that you should do more than I can make... I ask excuse, dear.... I love you... I want to ask you to finish all your experiences already... Otherwise we risk to lose touch sometime and to lose our happiness..... You're my life, my happiness and pleasure in life... I very much miss... I will hope that you see my letter and will answer soon....
I already miss you when I stop to write the letter for you..... I love you
my love Julian,
I very much waited your letter...
I have news. Yesterday I have been in travel agency. And I have paid trip insurance.
And I send you an insurance copy.
I could not pay more. You try to understand me.
Nobody will give money for me... Therefore I ask you,
That you could solve about 320 euros... And I can ask the bank account travel agency.
It will be ok for you?
I give you my mobile. 79023147315 but problem that i have local mobile connection. and i cant get international callings... my love
But I have agreed with the friendgirl today...
She has home phone. And I will call you today from her.
and you recall me to this number. it is her home phone - 79093674618
ok my love?
i hope that you can hear me, and we meet. we solve it.
But at first I will call you from payphone. And I will tell to you that you could call.
And then I go to the girlfriend. And you call to her this number
ok my sweet?
My love. I worry because of your uncertainty in me. But I really want to have a family.
I want to begin it with you.
And you saw that I am serious. I have started to prepare a meeting, my heart and you see it now
Answer me soon. And I will call you still
my heart Julian, I hope that you will answer me by phone today? I have been upset yesterday because you didnt wait my calling............ I cried yesterday before a dream............... You know about my holiday... And you know about my birthday on September, 5th!!! I spoke to you, my love... I had awful tears last 2 years... I had loneliness tears... And if I is lonely on my birthday again - I will die :-((( I beg you... For the sake of me, for the sake of my birthday, for the sake of our happiness - you try to accept me to my birthday... But I really hope and I wait a meeting... You understand me, dear I can ask the bank account of travel agency. It is ok for you? My love? Answer me soon And I will call you again today...