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Letter(s) from Anastasia Kolimulina to Jay (USA)
Finally I was able to write you a message.
I used or when not acquainted through the Internet.
And it decided to write you a message.
Today is my day well, I have a very good mood, and I immediately decided to write you a message.
My name is Alisa. I'm looking for a true man for serious relationship.
I can tell you more about yourself in your next letter.
I hope that you are interested in getting acquainted with me?
I'll wait for your news and add pictures. Alisa!
Nice to meet you! How are you doing? I write to you with my personal email so write to me at any time.
I will be always glad to answer you. I with pleasure will tell to you about me and about my life.
I send you my photo if it is pleasant to you, I will send to you more. I'm from Russia, I hope this is not a problem for us.
I also will be glad to see your photos.
I am very glad to receive from you letters. I to want to hear You more and I hope that find the good friend. In brief I to you will tell a little about myself. My name is Alisa . a to me 32 years. I much want to find the good friend hope, the satellite during life You understand me and we can correspond with you? I should like to report small about itself, this for me for the first time I never got acquainted through Internet but I think do the exception for itself. I have finished university, I doctor (the surgeon medicine) work in clinic of 4 years.
Specialise cranial-maxillofacial surgery. I much love the nature. I live in the Russian Federation (Russia). If you wished to know, where I live, I to you will necessarily tell in my following letter.I live one in house in which there is 2 rooms, I have a Dog on nickname Ralph (Breed at it Samoed), but it so on a note if it will be interesting to you. I have much friends. I much love to spend its free time with them. I very pleased that I have a good friends... I think that friends very important for each person. write me little about itself as You, conduct its free time that You love. If to you was a little, that I have told about myself in the following letter I will try to tell, it is as much as possible about myself. I will wait with hope, that you will answer me. With impatience I will wait for your letter and with your photo. All the same I want I will know with whom to carry on dialogue. On it I will finish the letter. See you later...
Your friend Alisa!
You have written the letter to me, it is very pleasant. Thanks, that you have found, that minute has answered me. Sincerely conversation I Could not hope for it.Tell to me about itself where you live?? Send to me the photo I wish you to see. Tell to me about the work. Where you work??? You have children?? Write to me on this email. With that I had problems. I do not know what to tell in my first letter because I never got acquainted through the Internet before. It - something new and unusual to me. But I shall try, write good letters to you. I assume, that you will be capable to understand mine Words also that I shall tell to you. I think, that will be correct if I start to speak you about mine all over again because it was I Who started to write. I am not confident, that you will love my letters, that they will be interesting to you but if it will not be so You will write to me about it. Well? Probably you will be surprised, that I do not live in your country. But I hope, that it does not shake You. Same I similarly to many other ladies in other countries in the world. I am a usual woman who has hands, legs, main a Heart which is the most important. I think, that my heart is very sensitive. I hope, that you will understand it from my letters. I shall be very happy, if the distance between us does not do afraid you, and you will answer me. Please not be too strict to My mistakes in words, the English language - not my native language. But I Assume, that I know it well. Well, my name - Alisa, as you To know. You can name me as you like. I shall not be disappointed. To me of 32 years. My birthday - on 28-th of May . I was Given birth in 1984. My height - 172 see. My weight - 47 kg. I live in city Izhevsk. Izhevsk known city of Russia. Izhevsk - very much beutive city. I assume, that you would like city if you saw it. I dreamed to become an actress in my childhood. Probably it - dream of many girls. But my dream did not become true. It is serious The validity of a life. I have finished medical university. My formation will consist of 3 levels: school, college, university. I Studied within 18 years. All 18 years I have studied the English language also. I have finished university in age 25. How to me gave with a medal for excellent results during my studying. Do not think, that I brag (Smile). Than I worked as the second surgeon in small clinic within 4 years. It was very much intresting and in the same Time responsable. I was happy to give health of people, to help them. Many things depend on me during actions. I think in The future I will be capable the surgeon to become independent. You think, what it - good dream? Probably that I shall work in Clinic, as the basic surgeon. Now I have the small house with a small garden. I live one for this reason I am not capable to Work in a garden it is constant. But however my garden is very beautiful and pleasant. I like to raise flowers because They the most beautiful which have been created by the nature. I live one, I have no neither children, nor the boyfriend. Sometimes I Feel like very lonely in my house. Perhaps, for this reason I have decided to get acquainted with you. To me already 32, also I take a life philosophically. I have the house, work, friends, but I cannot tell, that I am happy. I have was not present Many who I can my best half. I have written to you all over again, it means, that I can divide my ideas and feelings with you. I hope, that you will not be Laughter.
And we shall write many letters to each other. I am very pleased and grateful, that you have answered my letter, because I Decided to try to get acquainted through the Internet only once. And it was a miracle for me when you have written to me the letter. If it Was not, so I shall never try to do friends through e-mail once again. I never get acquainted before in such a way. I cannot Understand completely as it works because I have no computer. I - only beginer in work of the Internet. But I hope, that I shall be Be capable to write to you constantly. I hope, that you are interested in our dialogue, as I. I would like to ask you some questions. If you do not want to answer them, you could not to make it, I shall not be offended. What do you do? What your trade? Make you Similarly to this? Who - nambers your family? I ask to tell it in more detail. With whom you live? You can tell to me About all of you, that you want. I shall be pleased to know all about your life. It - only female curiosity. The hope will not offend it You. I understand, that tastes differ, but I hope, that my image will be pleasant for you. But I should tell, That I cannot receive the big files. I shall have trouble. As I use a computer on work. I hope, that you will write to me soon. I thank you Beforehand.
With the best regards. With the best regards.
Hello, I have not received from you the letter. I do not know, why you have not written to me?? Can at you cares above a roof or you have simply interrupted with me dialogue. I do not know what now to think.
Please answer my letter. If you will not complicate, answer my questions. I hope, that I will receive from you the letter.
I will well wait for your letter.
How - you today? I hope, that all - is good. I also am happy today because I have the letter from you. I have written to me! I very happy. I liked your photo. I hope, that I will receive from you still a photo.Now I work, and I write the letter to you. Last time I have not had time to add to you the letter. I hope this time to me will not prevent to make it. And so. I did not write to you about my family.
But I think that you should know about it, and now I am going to make it. I have been given birth also dews to Izhevsk. Now I live here. I do not make remember my father because he did not live with us. I was grown only by my mother. We were the best friends on the ground, we were very much the friend close to the friend. But my mum had a cancer of a stomach, and she has died in 2007. Year was horrable for me. I, though I was the unique person on the whole planet. It was awful and incredible. I could not understand it for long time. I was empty. It is difficult to imafine for ideas in my head and my feelings. Even now I remember my mum very much frequently. You know, that I had very happy childhood. My mum and I went in park together. We play together various games. We spoke much. Only than, several years I started to understand last, that she felt qulity because I had no father with me.
But I have received news from other people, that it was no mistake of my mother. My father (I cannot name his "daddy") never loved my mum.
Me has left her lonely when he has learned, that my mum was the pregnant woman. It was very difficult for her to bring up me, to feec me to buy me of a dress for this reason I do not carry bosh. We lived only her tiny earnings. But we never complained of our life - we have solved all problems together. But if we were happy, that we tried to tell about our success to our neighbours. My mum always spoke me, that I should marry the person which I shall love. She adviced I to besure in the person before movement to marry him. I think the same. I shall remember the moment during long time. I shall never forget mine eyes of mother when my leg has been broken also I couldn " t, go. Then we were far from our house up to, collects berries. Only my mum and I.
But she has taken me on her hands and bore mine to our house. You can imagine it? To me there were 12 years when my mum was carry of me duringan hour. I have understood, that it was difficult to her, but she did not want to leave me alone in a wood to go in the house, to ask whom - that the help. She was afraid, that something awful happen with me in a wood. I hope which you understand, that memory of my mum road for me. After death of my mum I feel very much lonly because I have no neither sisters, nor brothers. To be more exact, I have no any relatives. But I have friends. They Elena and Masha. They are remarkable girls. We can name us sisters because we are friends more than 15 years, and we help each other. I - confident absolotely, that if I ask Elena, Masha to help me they will never refuse. Our attitudes are very strong, Time has checked up them. One year ago Elena married, and her husband has taken her to his native city. We write letters each other very much frequently, but it is a pity, that we cannot see the most part the friend from the friend. But Elena has arrived to us in the spring. I taljed very much the whole week, but it was too little, we could not tell each other all events. Now Masha and I wait for Elena the following arrival. And you, make you hawer such friends?
Also In the summer for entertainment I work in my small garden. I raise flowers. But as a hobby it certainly flowers. Roses, orchids, tulips, an aster and it is a lot of others. But main the place in a garden has my favourite flowers, has raised also an orchid. The hope you can sometime see it. It is a pity, I can write more. I hope, that you will answer my letter. I also hope, that you are interested in our connection. I shall tell to you more about my life in my ambassador of letters. I think, that you are tolerant (smile).
Sincerely yours Alisa.
How are you? What is the weather like today in your country? I hope all is well.Now to answer your fundamental question - do I see in you the qualities I look for in a man? As yet James,it is very early days in getting to know each other.I am not a woman,who falls in love that easily, and I like to take some time to get to know a man before I let my feelings run free.Having said that I would say that I am physically attracted to you,I am mentally attracted to you and you tell me you are a interesting cultured and well educated person. What are your expectations and hopes in this regard?This may not be the words you want to hear but they are the truth - and as I said to you before I will not lie to you. I hope you appreciate the honesty and decide that you want to carry on getting to know me better. Today it was small a Rain. But it did not last long. Now the air is fresh outside and I'm glad that I can sit near the window and write a letter to you. Today I have had a difficult day, but now i'm free and I can spend my time writing you. Today it is cloudy outdoors that's why I am in a lyrical mood. By the way I'm sorry for my previous letter. It was sad. I did not want to make you disappointed. I hope you did not get offended to my story about the mother. Well, I'm in a good mood and I want to tell you about my hobbies. I like listening to different music. It depends on my mood and feelings. I like Russian composers such as Dunaevskiy and Chajkovsky. But I also like listening to Mozart and Bach. I think they are great composers and no body will surpass them. I like Joe Satriane as well. I suppose he is a magnificent guitar player. I hope you agree with me. I like the group “ Dire Straits ” very much. I like “ Pink Floyd ”. They are not similar to any others. There are a great number of popular musicians abroad. But I remember Russians as well.
May be you heard about the Russian group "Spleen" or "Chaif." But I think the most famous Russian group abroad is “ Gorky Park ”. Probably you've heard about it. They had a great success at the beginning of 90s. By the way I like going to the cinema very much. I like Russian directors such as Tarkovsky, Konchalovsky and Mihalkov. Now days a lot of foreign films are on the screen in Russia. Foreign cinema is widely spread in Russia. I like such old American films as Gladiator, Brave Heart. Mel Gibson is a good actor. New films are also interesting to me. I have seen “ The chronicles of Riddick ” and “ Another vs Predator ” recently. I liked it. I have some favourite shows. For example - "Wildlife" from BBC. They show the most beautiful views of nature and animals. I like to watch programs about nature and animals very mach. I also prefer to watch NBA games. They are fantastic shows.
But unfortunately NBA games are not very often shown on Russian TV.
Criminal programs have the biggest rating on TV, because here TV reporters tell about crimes occurring during a day or a week, they tell about leaders and authorities of criminal business in Russia, juvenile murderers and racists, addicts, maniacs, etc. You know the level of crimes is extremely high in Russia. The majority of our country like to watch these programs. But I hate to do it. I prefer to watch some musical and entertaining shows, and as a rule they are our (Russian) programs and of course they are not known to you. Now you think that I spend my time in front of the TV screen with my mouth full of popcorn and it takes me the whole day (smile.) But it's not true. Actually I watch TV very seldom, once in a blue moon. I have no time and forces to do it. My health is the most important thing for me. I do not boast. My health is really good, and I always try to be in a good form. I jag every morning, try to spend as much times as possible in the open air. I have no car and I take a bus or whatever (I mean transport) very seldom. I take cold - not shower. I have been living in the conditions of rather cold winters and damp autumn since my childhood. Such king of climate helps to toughen my health. I do not smoke and do not take alcoholic drinks. I prefer a healthy way of life and I'm proud of it. Sewing and knitting are my hobbies if it's possible to say so. I also like to spend my free time gardening and gathering much rooms and berries. I love to ski and to skate in winter. I can speak about my hobbies for a long time. But I also want to say that I do not like some things. I do not like artful and envious people. I hate when somebody lies and deceives. I do not love cruelty and roughness. I'm not interested in people, who prefer to spend their time drinking alcohol a lot. I also do not like bad untasty meal and cloudy days (smile.) James I shall be glad, if you tell about you many various things for me. I want to know about you more and more. Because you my FRIEND. You agree? Friends always should know well each other.
Hi my dear James!!
Thank you very much for your letter and your tender words and care.Now to answer your fundamental question - do I see in you the qualities I look for in a man? As yet James,it is very early days in getting to know each other.I am not a woman,who falls in love that easily, and I like to take some time to get to know a man before I let my feelings run free.Having said that I would say that I am physically attracted to you,I am mentally attracted to you and you tell me you are a interesting cultured and well educated person. What are your expectations and hopes in this regard?This may not be the words you want to hear but they are the truth - and as I said to you before I will not lie to you. I hope you appreciate the honesty and decide that you want to carry on getting to know me better.
You are so sweet to me, it is so pleasant for me to read your letters, when I close my eyes I can see you saying this to me, it makes me feel very good. That's a great feeling, I am thanking God that you are in my life. Even though we are far from each other in reality, in my dreams we are together, we are walking together at some nice place in the nature holding hands and saying tender and warm words to each other. I feel that you are very special to me, I need to read your letters like I need air or water for living. I couldn't even think that something like that could happen to me. Thank you that you are, James.
You know, James, I don't think that the outside beauty is the most important thing, you can be beautiful for some time, even the most beautiful, but in some years this beauty will go away, there will be other people who are going to be looking better. I think that the real beauty is inside your soul, that what stays forever. The person should be beautiful from inside, in my opinion. Don't you agree with me, James?
James, I see in you the person who I can talk easily with, who is interesting for me, the one who is making me want to know you more and more. I would like to know your soul, I would like to know everything about you. I see that you are not playing with me or joking around, many of our thoughts are the same, our values are very close and we are looking for the same things, we both are looking for the special one. I see that I can establish the emotional connection with you, I can talk to you on any topic, it's very easy for me, it seems like I know you for a long time.
I like your thoughts about life and relationships between man and woman. By your letters I can say that you are a decent man with serious intentions. I like that in you. I think that we are even a little bit alike in that. I am also serious about our correspondence.
I like to read your letters and I think that I will really like to talk to you in person, you seem to be an intelligent and well educated person. I hope that some time we are going to meet.
OK, James, I am finishing my letter now and I hope that you are having a great day!
I am thinking about you and I am really happy that we've met! This thought makes me smile :)
Hope to hear from you soon!
Hi my James !!!!
Thank you very much for your letter, I was very glad to receive it as usual because your letters always put me in a good mood and make me smile :) I am thinking a lot about you and I like to read from you, James. I am very glad that you understand me. You the unique person which to worry about me. You know, James, I need to tell you something. I think that friendship is very important in the relationships. Let me explain what I mean here. I think that passion and affection are very good, but two people that decide to be together need to know how deal with each other in everyday life. You know what I mean? And I think that friendship between them will help a lot. I would like to see a very good, I can say the best friend in my soul mate. I think that emotional connection is very important, so that two people will feel very comfortable with each other. How do you think, James?
When I am reading your letters, James, I feel that you are honest and sincere with me, you are telling me a lot about you, so I want to give you the same thing. You know, I have a dream. I would like to find a true love, a special person who is going to love and take care of me and I will do the same for him. I want our love to be forever. I think that when I meet that special one I will give him all of my tenderness, care and love. And what is your dream? What do you want the most from life, James? Please, tell me. It will be very interesting for me to know what you are thinking and dreaming about.
You know, James, I need to tell you something. I have never thought before that this is possible to find a very good friend, somebody special with the help of Internet. But now I can say that this happened to me, I’ve met you and it seems to me like I know you for a long time even though we exchanged only a few letters. Now I can say that there is a person in the world who understands me, my life position, whose dreams and intentions are close to mine. You should know that you are dear to my heart, I am always ready to listen, understand and try to help you if you need that. Ok, I am finishing my letter now and I will be looking forward to your reply, James!!!
I am thinking about you!!! :)
With tender hugs and kisses
Hi my James! Now I'm writing to your letter and I'm happy. It's very pleasant that I have such a friend as you are. It's a pity that you are far from me. But I will hope that we will meet one day. I think we will be glad to see each other when we know each other better. Masha ask me about you every day. I say to her that I'm constantly thinking about you James. She is glad for me, and she always asks me to remember her to you. Earlier I didn't manage to find the carpenter.
But today I have seen him in the morning and I asked him to repair the door in the Klava house. In the afternoon he came and said that he had done everything and changed the lock. I thanked him but he said: "Never mind" becouse he is always ready to help old people. My neighour came a little bit later and told me about the carpenter. It turned out that he refused to take money for his work. Klava tried to give him some money but he said that he would be offended if she didn't stop doing it. Klava said: "He has gone with nothing". By the way he and his college will repair my roof in the house. You know many people in Russia help other people and don't take money for it, if they know that the people have to money. I think it's the only good feature of character of the Russian people which roots go to the old far USSR. It's a pity that many Russian men became alcoholics. I remember that many-many years ago my mum and I had to make a fence around our house. But what could we do? My mum and I? When my mother came to a shop to buy nails, three men asked her what for she needed nails. She told them and they began laughing, when learnt that a young lady and her little daughter wanted to do. They came to our house together with my mom and everything was ready in the evening. They repesed to teke money. The only thing we could do for them just to feed them with pancakes after their work. By the way since that time it is my favorite food. One of the man asked if the had something to paint the fence. My mum answered that she would buy paint a little bit leter. Bu the very next day in the morning the 2 men came and they brought their own paint and paited the fence. We wanted to pay them for it some money, but they refused.They said that the paint was left after the painting of their fence. Yesterday in the evening I was thinking of my future work in the clinic. I'm happy that I will get my favorite job. I should not study, because I have the diploma of the surgeon of the European standard. I don't know how to spend this month, I don't want to waste my time uselessy. I must think it over.
Of course I will write letters to you. But it will take only the part of my day. What to do in the rest? I must find a decision. I hope James, you are not sick and tired of my letter.But I want to tell you much. I think you are not against of it, because I suppose you are my friend. Don't forget to write letters to me.
Hi my dear James!!!
How are you doing today? What’s new? I am fine over here and I was very glad to hear from you because I miss you very very much!!! I am thinking about you all the time, you are very dear to me.Yes I would like to work in Europe, my diploma gives such possibility. Yes I am able to speak in English.
James, you know, today I woke up with sun beams that were coming out of my window and my first thought was about you! :) I was laying in my bed and thinking, imagining that may be some wonderful day we’ll be waking up together like this and the first thing you will do when you wake up is kissing me and wishing me a good morning and I will do the same for you. You know, James , I liked that thought :) Who knows, may be some day it will be the reality? How do you think? Would you like that, hun? OK, my dear, I am finishing my letter and I will be looking forward to your reply!!!
I miss you!
With sweet thoughts about you, Alisa...
Hi my James! How are you? Today I've the big desire to write to you.
Hope you don't object? I suppose I can tell you about my bad experience in relations. If you are not interested in it you may stop reading the letter. I won't be offended. I think I can tell you the story because you have become very very close to me recently. I hope you have an idea of the problem with alcohol in Russia and I suppose you understand why I don't want to look for a husband in Russia. Let's begin since the very first day of the acquaintance. I worked in the clinic as a surgeon's assistant. I was going home after my work but it began raining and I could not go because I had left my umbrella at home. It was summer but never the less I didn't want to get wet and to take a cold. I was standing under the roof of the building waiting till the rain would stop. But the rain was not going to stop and I wanted to go home in the rain. But a young man was going in my direction with an umbrella. He saw that I couldn't go with an umbrella and offered me to take his one. I asked him: "And what about you?" He said that he would spend some time in the clinic and may be the rain would stop soon. I asked how I would be able to return him the umbrella. he said his adress to me and his name. His name is Vladimir.
It was not far from the clinic. I wrote down his adress and promised to give him the umbrella the next day in the evening. On my home I thanked the yuong man and asked the God to stop the rain. But it was raining the whole night. I cursed myself that I had taken the umbrella and that he was wet to the skin because of me. I didn't sleep a wink at night. The next day in the clinic was so long for me. I was looking forward to finishing my work to give the umbrella back to Vladimir. I wanted to learn how he was. As soon as my working day was over, I chanded my working clother and left my work. Vladimir was standing at the door smiling. It turned out that he remembered the time when my work was over. He came to meet me. I asked about his health at once.
he said that everything was all right. He didn't get too wet because he was running home. Then we walked for a long time. we talked a lot.
My mum had died already and i was alone. He was the dearest and the closest man in the world for me at that time. He saw much of each other at time. But i didn't invite him my house I wanted to check him.
Once we were invited to a Birthday party of his friend. I agreed to go to see his friends, as i wanted to know more about him. Vladimir didn't drink even champagne. I thought it was because of me, because I didn't drink as well. But his friends told me that Vladimir really didn't drink alcohol. I liked Vladimir. I think so did he. we became more than friends and he began to live in my house. First 2 months we were very happy, we were on the seveth heaven. But then he got a very good job. He became a lawyer. he made much money. But he began drinking alcohol. At first a little bit - then more and more. he didn't sleep at home at night. When he was drunk he began beating me.
I tolerated, I beared it. I thought he change for the better, that he would the same he had been before. But nothing chanded. Once I was beaten by him bitterly and left my house. He didn't came back 9 days.
Our friends told me that they had seen Vladimir with other girls. I came to the conclusion that it was enough to bear it. When he came back he even wasn't sorry and didn't apologize. I don't think that he had forgotten that he had beaten me. I didn't say a word in the evening. I started the talk in the morning when he was sober. So I made him leave my house forever. He was shouting, screaming and he even broke a foto in the frame where my mom and I were. I saad to him that I would call a police, well he had gone. Forever. Now I am happy that I didn't marry him. I don't want such relations once again.
Almost all Russian men drink alcohol alot that's why I don't want to have any relations with them. I suppose you understand me, James. I'm sorry my letter is too long. But I wanted to show you what I am feeling. I am very happy that I got acquainted with you. I hope our communication will never stop. Masha has told to you "Hi". I have to finish me letter. Thanks that you write me. With all my heart, your Alisa.
P.S. By the way, I have overlooked to tell to you. Today carpenters have repaired my roof. I am happy! It is very little necessary for the lonely woman for happiness!!! (smile) My roof was repaired by the same carpenter who repaired Klava door. He has again refused to take the money. I have told, that I indignant. But nevertheless I could present him two bottles of vodka. The carpenter has agreed to take only it.
Dear mine James!!!
Today I went in travel agency and again have learned, that it to be necessary for me for arrival in your country. People have convinced me of travel agency, that we can be together. I am in good mood. I Has asked them once again, how much it would cost for me to make visa.
They said that only the examination of application for visa will cost me 30 usd. This money will not be returned even if the application is rejected. To gat visa I must go to Moscow where is the Embassy.
I'll to visit a lot of agencies, offices and organization in Izhevsk in Moscow. This is the usual way to get visa, it may take me many months.
I said to them that I could wait for a long time. And they offered me to solve the problem and it will take me less time if I use Full Package of Service (FPS.) FPS includes additional payments for a category of the visa, consular services, preparation for interview with commission. FPS costs 360 usd, but the visas agency remove all the problems and thus increases the chance of getting a visa without excessive delays (I can get a visa in a week or two). I thought for a long time and came to the conclusion that this variant is the only right for me. Whether I do not know correctly has made, having paid such money. Probably I needed to consult to you all over again. But I have thought that other exit is not present. For a cheap payment documents are very for a long time made. We do not have time to wait.
I agreed and registered my application for visa, hoping that you'll be glad to meet me. Can you imagine that we'll spend some weeks together Or even can all life. For the sake of happiness and family I am ready on many things. I very much would dream that you all life were only near to me.. I'm immensely happy when I'm thinking about the opportunity. I'll be everything myself? May be you think I try to do too quickly, probably you suppose it's too earty everything us to meet each other. But I cannot wait for ages, I'm happy now at present time.
Necessary to begin moving to howe something in your life, it's important to go ahead, to overcome difficulties to take aim. Very soon I'll leave the work and I'll be able to spend my vacation with you, James. I have never been abroad. but now I have a chance to meet you.
It's a dream. You are my friend, and friend sometimes meet each other.
I think it will be great, wonderful, fantastic. I hope you do not think that I'm too impudent. I just want to met you and to spend some time with you. I suppose you have not changed your attitude towards me after this letter. I'm looking forward to seeing to calm down my heart. Please tell me you be able to meet me? Will you be happy to face me? I hope you'll!!!