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Letter(s) from Leysan Muchametchanova to Greg (USA)
Hello loved !!!
How your affairs? How yourself you feel? What weather in your city, in the country? At us weather in city simply is mad. Today it is warm, the sun shines, and there will be tomorrow a strong rain, and in the evening a frost and it is cold. Simply something abnormal. What occurs to weather? By the way, all climate at us was displaced for one month forward. Colds began to come later, becomes warm too late. Already so it would be desirable heat, the sun. It would be desirable to dress the easy dress, open shoes and to take a walk in the evening on city when the warm wind blows. I very much love summer. May be because I was born in the summer? It is pleasant to me in the summer. It seems to me, that this season is pleasant to all without exception.
Soon 11 years as there was no my father. My mum till now and does not know up to the end under what circumstances my daddy has died. It was impossible to achieve the truth earlier. Earlier anybody did not speak about it. Have simply closed this business and all. As though there was nothing. It is insulting, that so was earlier. I very much frequently recollect the father. It is bad, that at me is not present the brother the sister. I think, that my friends began me already as brothers and sisters. I till now have those friends with whom I communicate from the earliest childhood. I think, that to me very much was lucky that I have such friends. You see friends are always necessary, they may help you. Sometimes not all can be told to mum or daddy. And friends always will understand you. It seems to me that it is impossible to live to one in this world. Friends were necessary always. Only earlier it seemed to me to find to itself the friend much easier. Was more than fair people earlier. Now many search only for benefit in relations. My friends of me never betraid. I am very glad, that I have such support. It has very much helped me. You know, sometimes there are such situations that all occurs against you. And the most insulting when in this situation friends turn away from you. You hope to the aid your friends, and they simply turn away from you. They simply do not want to interfere with your problems. I know such cases, it seems to me that almost a crime. I recently looked film. He refers to as "RUNAWAY". I liked this film. It is Russian film. Usually Russian films not so good, but this film on has made especial impression. I briefly shall write to you the maintenance of this film.
The man had very good clinic in which treated love. But in one day at him have killed the wife. And all facts were against him. But actually he was not guilty. When him already condemn, he went in a train, him carried in other city.He went not one in a train, together with him went 2 more condemned. One of condemned has decided to run away. All was arranged. So it has turned out, that in time was lost 4 security guards and these two condemned. And again all facts were against him. He was searched by two inspectors. At one inspector the child was sick, and this the man might cure the child of the inspector. The second inspector wanted to kill it the man. The second inspector wanted to kill him because as he thought, that this the man operated his wife, and his wife has died. This second inspector also has killed the wife of this owner of clinic, in a consequence he killed native, close people of the owner of clinic. All was finished by that this owner of clinic his best friend who was the co-owner has brought. I can not write to you this film because it very much confusing, and to me seems that to you not so interestingly to read it. I think, that you should look this film.
Essence of this film it is those, that the man was betraid by his best friend. Because of it all life at the man was spoiled. And he very strongly loved the wife, he wanted to get the child. But he was prevented by the friend, the friend of him has betraid. I cried, when looked this film. It very much Good film. It seems to me, that in life such and happens. Therefore always it is necessary to speak the truth, that then would not be Treachery.
Lovely you write me that you suffer because of age. About lovely really you think that for me it important for me the most important that the person was kind and yours faithfully would concern to me. You understand me???
Forgive me, but I can not write to you more. I am tired, and want to have a rest. I think, that you understand me. I wait again for your new letter. I like your letters. It is pleasant for me to receive them.
Hello my dear Greg!!!
I am very glad to see your letter. It is pleasant for me, that you have again written to me the letter. I all the day waited for that moment when at me work will be finished and I can write to you the letter. I very much wanted to read your letter faster. It was very interesting to me, that you will write to me. I waited for your letter. I yesterday the whole evening thought that I am happy. I am happy, because you write me letters. I am glad, that we with you have relations. I might not fall asleep. I all thought and thought of it. I am glad to your letters as the child. It is very pleasant for me to receive and read your letters.
There may be with me something happened? But me it becomes cheerful on soul when I read your letters, I think of you. I was more and I dream of us with you more. I present as relations will develop. But I do not want anything to speak forward. I want, that at us with you all would be good. I today all the day thought of you. I should think of you. You always with me. I want to know, that you will not leave anywhere. But in my ideas you with me. But I do not know, when you can tell me, that will not leave anywhere from me. I would like, that you such would tell me. To me it would be very pleasant for hearing. I am afraid, that my letter may frighten or push away you from me. I do not know, how you will react to my letter. But I do not want to be silent, when I would like to write to you it. It is pleasant for me to communicate with you. You the interesting person. I want to continue our correspondence, our relations further. It seems to me, that you that person with whom I want to continue relations and to create something more serious, than correspondence. I do not want to lose you. I shall not hide the feelings. I do not want to hold in myself about what my heart wants to speak. It seems to me, that you will understand me. I very much hope for it. Some people pass past, do not notice the happiness. Many people long time search for the love. Would be necessary time what to understand the feelings, ideas. But to me is not necessary to time so much. I have enough of that is. And I fairly can tell you, that it is words from the heart. I already wrote to you that I do not like to lie. I like to live fairly. I have got used so to live. I do not want to deceive that person who trusts me. Because it is important for me, that that person I will think of me with which communicate. Especially it is important for me, that you will think of me. Therefore I shall write to you only the truth. Mum of me has brought up so, that I simply am not able to lie. My mum always learned to speak me only the truth. Because on lie of relations it is impossible to construct. I do not like when me deceive. I know, how a bit too sometimes it happens to learn that the close person lies to you. You see all relations are under construction first of all on trust. I think, that you understand me. I do not want to cause you a pain. Therefore I shall not lie. Also that would not happen in our further relations - I shall speak you only the truth. I want, what and you spoke me only the truth.
You that person with whom I want to create serious relations. It seems to me, that it will be difficult for me to express all feelings in the letter. But I think, that you can understand me. I think that the main thing, that between us there would be a understanding. My heart speaks, that wants to be with you. My heart again and again would like to think of you. You see heart cannot to forbid love. Sometimes it seems, that heart and reason exist separately from each other. I shall answer all your questions. I do not want, that you would doubt of me. To me important your opinion on me. That you will write to me about yourself is important for me. It is interesting to me All to know about you. That you very would be would be desirable me now beside. Then I might tell you everything, that at me now in a head and in heart. My heart wants heat. Wants your heat. My heart wants to tell to you that it now tests. You know, it is sometimes very hard to hold in yourself about what it would be desirable to tell. You understand me? I do not want to hurry event. But I know, that our dialogue on it will not be finished. I think, that you have understood me. Heart and soul do not feel age, do not see appearance. Persons like not for something. Like simply so. I can not explain, why heart likes this or that person. It is stronger than our reason. Excuse, if this letter has disturbed you. But it would be pleasant for me to see your letter again. I would like to know, how you have reacted to my letter. Because to me important your opinion. I want to know your ideas. I want to know, that you think of me. Only I again and again ask you, that you would write to me the truth. I do not want to read lie. That I have written all to you, it is not simple words. May be to you it becomes ridiculous, after you will read my letter. But I have written to you about of what I think. It is everything, that occurs to me now. To me it will be very bad, if you will not answer me or will reject me. I would like reciprocity. But I do not know precisely as you treat to me. I would like to know it.
LOVELY about age. What exactly you have not understood. I have written that is not important me what age at the person. That he me loved the main thing. You have understood me??? I love romantic comedies and dramas. My loved actor Brad Pitt. Yes I very much love the American cinema I think that it is the best films in the world.
On it I shall finish the letter. I shall wait for your answer. I shall wait for your opinion. You do not imagine, as I now worry. I do not know, what letter I shall receive. Probably, it will be hard for me to fall asleep.
My loved, I want to tell to you about the childhood. I think, that it will be interesting to you to read this letter.
Lovely when I was in an early age I my and my girlfriend the first time have gone dancing. My love, I is not skilful to dance the first time and consequently we together with the girlfriend trained at home slightly. And we have then decided, that all at us will turn out. When we trained houses we included that music disko and danced. Then it was beaten for us with minutes of entertainment and thought, as though it is good to dance when many people. After we long time trained we send on a disco. Then when we with the girlfriend came there, strongly music there played and I was some time in confusion. Because I the first time have seen so many people and as all of them well danced. All over again I have wanted to leave, but my girlfriend of me has not released, and has told, that we came here not simply so. We would come here what to relax and take pleasure. And then we began to dance. My love, I in the beginning and itself has not understood as well at me all it turned out. And many guys looked at us. But we did not look at them because we would come what to have a rest and dance, instead of for that what to get acquainted. At the end of this all history I was pleased, because I have had a rest, when I danced. My love, earlier I had such ideas, but now I have matured also I think only of love. My lovely, now I have love both it you. And I think only to you. Now I would not like to dance without you. Now I do not want to have a rest without you. You know, my girlfriends go to walk, have a rest. They begin to get acquainted with whom. But now with them it is not interesting to me. Because I love you and I would like to be only with you. To me it is not cheerful with them because I always think of you. I would want that you were with me, that we together with you would spend time, walked, joked. But you are not present beside and consequently to me sadly. I want to nestle on your man's chest cell. I want to lay on it. Because I shall feel like better and my love is more sure only with you. My loved, lovely person, I love you and only you, I want to be only with you, my pleasure. I now in life want only one what to be with you and to love only you. I now was defined in the life and I have made the choice. I want to be with you. I already adult girl. I realize, that I do. I was fine it I realize, and consequently I confidently can tell you, that I really want to be with you. And now I precisely know, that I love you. Now I any more do not want to walk and have fun. Because I want to be with you, I want to arrive to you and to love you really. My love, I think that you understand my words correctly. I want to tell you, that I am seriously adjusted by way of ours with you of relations. I want to speak you, that only you my unique love which to me so is strongly necessary for m that I each time think of you. I want to be with you and to love you.
Lovely yes I believe in the god. I the christian. But I seldom go to church.
Yes lovely I love a beach. I like to walk very much. Very well that you do not smoke and do not drink, you mean will be always healthy. Yes I very much love animal especially cats.
My loved, I think, that you liked to read the letter. I think that I have correctly expressed you the ideas, that you have understood me. I am ready to repeat infinite quantity of times, that I love you. That more nobody is necessary for me except for you.
You know, to me would be as very interestingly to learn histories from your life. I with the great pleasure would read them because it is interesting to me to learn something about you, I shall find out more about you. I any more know about you a little, but I would like to learn about you more and more and more. Really it is very interesting to me to learn about you something new. I think that I have suggested you idea what to you to write to me the big letter. It is interesting to me to learn from you histories or a situation.
I again want to tell you, that I love you, that you are very dear to me. My heart all is stronger and stronger to beat, when I speak you words about love. I love you my love, I again wait from you for the letter.
Greetings my lovely again.
I want to tell, that am madly glad, that we with you are copied. It is very pleasant for me to receive from you letters. I want, what you as are possible for me wrote more often. I like to read your letters. Sweet, I think, that you were not so puzzled with my last letter. But I have really nobody more about it to write. I want, that you would know, how I live. I want to tell to you everything, that to me occur. As it is interesting to me to know, that occurs to you. I would like to learn more your life. I want to know, than you are engaged. It is interesting to me to know as you will spend time. I want, that you about all would write to me. It is really important for me. Because I love you. I want to be with you. You are necessary for me, lovely. You know, I am mad you I like. I want, that we with you would be together. I can not transfer you in a word all feelings. It is simply impossible. But I want, that you would know, that I love you. That more nobody is necessary for me except for you. I do not want you to lose, I am afraid of it. Simply you that person with which to me are very pleasant to correspond. You that person to which at me are feelings. You that person with which I want to be together which is necessary for me. I very strongly like. To tell the truth, I feel the young girl. I would like to be pleased, smile constantly. Because my heart loves you. Because all my ideas only about you. I always think of you. I simply shall go from mind. But on the other hand, sometimes it happens me sadly when I look at the in love pairs. Because they together, they beside. And you, my love, very far, you not with me. It is a pity, that you so are far from me. But I think, I hope that we with you shall be together. I frequently present myself as will occur ours to you of a meeting. I am afraid of that you may leave me. I at all do not want to think of it. But I think of it. You for me are expensive. I can not present myself, that with me begin, if you with me will stop relations. I do not want, that such would take place. Simply you do not understand, how strongly I love you. I want to carry spend each minute with you. I want, that you would embrace me. I want to be with you. I want, that you would kiss me. I very much want to kiss you. I want, that your hands of me would embrace. I want, that we with you I would like each other. You may not present yourself as I live. I live simply in dreams. Because in my dreams you always with me. I can not more so. I want to be with you. I want with you a meeting. You know, I want to be happy, I want to be with you. I love you. I have found the happiness, it you. I do not want to lose the happiness. I want to love and be loved. You understand me? How I can penetrate into your heart, what you would understand me?
You know, sometimes it seems to me, that you simply do not love me. I want to be with you. I want with you a meeting. I want it already long time. But you do not understand me. Why so it turns out? Understand, that I simply madly love you. I would like to live with you all stayed time. I want to give each day to you the love. I want to wake up with you, I want to fall asleep with you. I want to feel your heat. I want to see your eyes constantly. I love you. Lovely, my heart became very big since I have got acquainted with you. Because my heart likes. Now the love to you lives in it. It never can stop loving you.
I do not know, that else I can write to you. But I think, that you have understood me. I think, that we with you shall be together. I ask, do not kill in my heart love. She there lives also to it well. I never thought, that it is possible so to love. That it is possible to love up to madness. But it so, I so like. You know, sometimes even it is hurt from such love. It would be desirable to be pleased, but heart longs. Because you are not present near to me.
Sweet. I should finish the letter. I want, that you would answer me. I very much wait for your letter. I want to be with you. Know, that I always think of you. I love you above all. You road for me persons.
I love you. I gently whole you.
Greetings my dear!
Today I again thought all day of you. I should think of you. You always with me. I so would like to be with you. I would like to nestle on you all body. I want to feel, that you with me beside. That you will not leave anywhere. But I do not know, when this moment will come. I think, I am simply sure, that this moment will come.
I do not know, but may you disturb my letters. May you excites that I so quickly write you such gentle words. You know, it is very pleasant for me to communicate with you. You the interesting person. I want to continue with you relations. I do not want to hide the feelings. Yes, I have to you feelings. But I can not be sure on all hundred percents. But I can tell you precisely, that I never before did not meet such pleasant interlocutor. No, you do not think, that you simply the interlocutor. You that person with which I want to create serious relations. I do not want to lose you. I do not think, that at me am too fast to you there are feelings. Even if they also occur quickly what for me them to hide. I do not want to hold all this in myself if I really want to be with you. Understand, that for some people enough one sight what to fall in love, and for some - long time. Some only after it is long dialogue understand, that they have found that person with whom want to be. But it is necessary to me so much a lot of time, what it to understand. I already have understood it, and I do not want you to lose. You understand me? I am afraid of that you may not understand me simply. I am afraid, that you may my feelings to you not so to understand. I would want that you have correctly understood me. I do not know, how I can explain you it. I want to tell you, that at me to you really present feelings. It is not simple words, it goes from the heart.
I want to tell you, that I do not like to tell lies. I like all to speak to face, directly. Because it is not pleasant to me, when people of me deceive. It seems to me, that it is pleasant to nobody. You see all relations are under construction only on trust. This most important concerning people. I to behave by a principle: both you treat to people, and they concern to you. Therefore I speak the truth, I would want that also to me spoke the truth. I and now speak you the truth. I do not lie. Because I know, how hurt when you deceive. How hurt then to learn, that you not loved by that person who before repeated to you constantly, that he loves you. I know, it is very hurt. I do not want to cause you a pain. I would not want that you then accused me in something.
I have one more quality of character. I never change to the feelings. I was not mistaken in people. I always can define, that for the person before me if I shall communicate to him a small amount of time. It is not difficult for me. Because when I studied as the doctor, at us one time was such subject as psychology. Me there to much have learned. I liked this subject. he to me actually now helps to understand people better. Therefore I am sure that you that person to whom I want to write such words. You that person who has mentioned my heart. I would want that you there remained for ever. I would not want that you have left me and my heart. I can tell you, that I want to be with you. I am afraid to speak you that can not present that may take place with me if you will leave me one. I ask you, that you would speak me always the truth. You are necessary for me, understand.
As I still can prove to you that I am not mistaken in the feelings. I can not describe it to you in the letter. It seems to me, that the feelings in a word to not express. Feelings can be felt only. It can be noticed under the relation of the person to you. As a matter of fact, to write it is possible anything you like. But if you actually believe the person to you becomes without a difference, that you do not see him. The most important, that you love him, and that he loves you. Dear, I really want to be with you. But I can not transfer you the condition oppress. I suffer that you are very far from me. I would want that you have understood me. I would not want that you doubted of me. It is very important for me, that you think of me. It is important for me to know your opinion. I do not think, that I hurry events. I do not want to be silent, when my heart speaks that is hard for him without you that is hurt him. That it searches heat, searches your heat. You are necessary for me only. Excuse, that I have written to you such letter. Probably you it was boring to read it. Excuse, but these are my feelings to you. I can not forbid to like to the heart.