Letter(s) from Tatyana Kalinichenko to Jim (USA)

Letter 1

Hi there my sweet Jimmy, a mystery man, why mystery, cause you jumped out of darkness to bring some sunshine in my lonely life and thank you for that, you know when i discovered your letter it made me smile, maybe we are already made the first steps to each other like reaching through the distance and time, mayby it was a call of destiny which made you to get to the computer and send some lines to the lonely girl from the distant Ukraine, you know I put so much hope in these lines, I do not know you yet, but we will have some time to discover our inner self and then , maybe, who knows, discover, that even inspite of the fact we live so far away and come from different origins, we still share the same desires, cause heart doesn't recognise languages, it has its own language, won't you agree that everyone wants to be loved and to love, none wants to walk through this life all alone, no one wants to be lonely, but as Omar Hayam said in one of his versuses, its better to stay hungry, then to eat whatever and it is better to be alone than with whoever, don't you agree, maybe that is why I am still alone, I am not that young, I am not 18-year old naive girl who has heard about love only from the love stories and songs, have been there, have tasted all the bitter tastes, but still not desparate, you know, sometimes I feel like a lonely sea gull from the famous phylosophical story of Richard Bach, who is always striving for perfection and trying to find the sence in this life, through the years, I realise that even if you achieved everything but have no one to share it with, your life is useless, you know each time going to bed, I realise that loneliness is a cruel motion, it is eatign you up from inside, step by step you life is gettign covered with the prizma of grey colors, and then you suddenly feel the pain in your heart which makes its hard to breathe and be happy, I am an optimist, yes, I am , even if some of my words gives you an impression of being desparate, just not knowing from what side the dawn comes I open all the windows, my window is open for you, my window is open for the destiny, maybe you would trust me enought to open your heart, I know it is hard, my heart has alot of sides, it remembers alot of pain, my greatest one is that I still do not have a child,.see it is hard to talk about personal issues, but nothing is impossible, right, like it is said, everything you can imagine is real, so close your eyes and ask yourself what you are craving for the most, can you feel your imagination drawing the eyes of the person, who always cares, who always loves you, whose heart is beating n'sync with yours, then maybe we share the same desire, maybe, right, tell me what is inside of your heart, I am not the counselor, but I can be a good listener, promise, am I talking too much, it maybe, then, I'd better stop for a minute and will try to capture your smile, you are so lovely, when you smile and you are in power to make this world at leats a little bit lighter, so, please, smile and don't forget to drop me a line, deal? Cannot wait to hear from you, Yours Tatyana

Letter 2

Hi there sweetheart, my sweet jimmy, gosh what a nice day outside, it seems like the sunshine is sending me your warmth, it feel so great, baby, you know, sweetheart, I have been watching the clocks ticking away and was wondering, how many more times the pointer would make a circle untill we are together, I was always thinking about the time but since I met you, i think even time has no power on me, only you, my love, only you, yesterday I took a walk around my nighbourhood, do not know why, i just felt so sad, I was thinking how nice it could be just simple watch TV with you and then fall asleep on your shoulder, it seems that you just walked away to get cigareretts or a coke, and will be right back, I was waitign and waiting, but you were not showing up,so I left the indifferent walls of my appartment and stepped into a silince of the sleeping city, it was freesing, but I didn't care, i guess I looked like a burglar, maybe , but nothing really mattered, I was walking to where the moonlight was leading me to , and I thought it would get me to you, so I went to an old community close by, and found old swings,that reminded me about the swings I used to ride when i was a little girl, you won't believed but I 've got on them , and started swinging myself, faster and faster, the blisterign cold was burning my face and wind was splashing my hair, but it felt so nice , I felt like I could fly, for a moment it seemed that I 've managed to get off the land and started my flight with the wind, and then I looked up and saw your face, I mean the strars gathered in some kind of puzzle and created an image of you, I am not joking, and I was not intoxicated, honey, but you were there, honestly, you smiled at me and I knew you were thinking of me at that time, then i realised that I might be swinging for around 40 minutes and as I was gettign dizzy, I decided to come back home, where I embraced my pillow imagining you next to me and felt asleep, honey, you are always with me, in the stars and moon, in the day time and night, I see you everywhere and i know you are following my steps everywhere, I love you, my dearest creature, i love you with all my heart, Honey, you know I have bene thinking that we just need to be appreciative of our great fortune of finally finding one another!!! I wish everyone could experience this kind of happiness and love!! It doesn't seem right that there are many people out there that will never experience our kind of love!!! Being of such selfless nature I almost feel guilty in having your love, and others don't!! Then again I feel that I'm deserving of being "loved" by such a magnificient man!!!! To have, to love, to cherish, until the end of time!!!! I would go as far as to say that you're my "dream man ", but I wouldn't be telling you the truth because you literally have urpassed all expectations I ever had in my so -called "dream partner!!!!" I thought the only way a man like you existed was soley through fantasy!!! I'm going to do everything in my power to deserve your love, and continue to do so!! as you are my angel sent from above,, baby, and for this I praise this liofe,, my sweetheart,, ye,s you are right it will be more than usefull for me to speak English to me, I want to have a chance to tell you without any pasrties included(sorry,, translator) what I keeo for you inside,, what an impact you have one me, hwo you changed my life,and how happy you are makign me, have I told you it is my favourite opart of the day when I come here and read you sweet lines, I am visualising you sitting across the table and me talking to you,, honey,,I appreciate your help with my classes, I will be a good student,, promise, i will not to anything to disappoint you,, juts to make you happy and proud of me, I consulted with my translator, and she todl me that three month will be enough for at least to pick up some basics, and to support a conversation,,and then I will be practicing with you,, right?:) Honey, I appreciate your help, you are so caring, my sweet,,but how will you send me those funds, honey, i thought that please, do not think to send them in the envelope, as all the letters and packlages are scanned for money and I will never get them ,, my translator suggested using Western Union, do you know what it is,, I think you know much better than me, I was todl you will need my adress and full name, you might have it, but in case you forgot, it is

Tatyana Kalinchenko
Mirniy block,15/95
and after you madea transfer you will need to send me somethig like match control number, so with my Id I will be ableto poick it up,, welll it is such a mess for me now, as I never used it, but you,, my smart sweetie, will figure out, right,
I cannot wait to start those English classes,
Love you,