Letter(s) from Alla Tikhonova to Michael (USA)

Letter 1

Dear Michael! Sorry for misunderstanding, but you were the first who started the correspondence.You wrote: "How can such an incredibly beautiful young woman still be single? Just another older American man (46) admiring the beutiful ladies on this site. I have a profile here too if you're interested. I don't normally respond to the ads, but I had to tell you how lovely you are. If you would like to correspond I would be pleased to get to know you.Michael" I've already told this is my first experience that is why I was wondering if somebody will write to me. I was waiting for a progress and you know, to wish to progress is the largest part of progress. I' ve heard a lot (both positive and negative) about Internet from my friends and i realised that it will not be a big mistake to have a trial. I am sure that this risk will change my live. Friendly speaking i think that Iternet is like the roulette: some people loose, some people win. And usually winners are brave and self-confident people. If you want to win you need to risk. And i want to win, i want to meet the only man i need, i want to be happy, to love and to be loved. Yes, I believe in destiny. I believe that there is something that does not depend on human. But the same time I think that man can make everything in his life for to be happy. And I'll try to do this. I'll try to do everything what I want because sometimes even unreal plans became true.Wow.. It's smth like a pholosopy... Concerning to your questions (if you really want to know) my birthday is 24-th of October, I study Ukrainian language and literature. My folks have rather strict rules inabout children educatoin that's why I entered Philological Department of University in Luhansk withoun any objections, although I have a dream to be a master of style in cosmetics. I believe that someday this dream may become true (that's why I have a part-time job in a cosmetic shop).So, in the morning I go to the University, the time after classes I spend in the shop (as an assistent) and at the evenings I study again: I have to read a lot. I like books: their's hard covers and the special smell of the new ones, but I give preference to the classics, because nowdays books are written by readers and nobody wants to read them. (if you are not agree, name the author and the book, I will read it and maybe we'll argue about it). Unfortunately I can not yet start reading the literature at English (my level does not allow), but I want to take a try someday. Cats are Ok but I prefer dogs. Yes, I like music: blues, jass, some kind of romantic ballads, but my favourite is classics. I like staying in a silence. Boris Pasternak have said: " The silence is the best thing from all I have ever heard!". You know, I'm still rather young, I have never been married, I have no children, but I dream of really good man (goodhusband and good father for my kids). Nowdays the idea of reaching the success, of having a lot of money is very popular here in Ukraine between the youth. They do not have neither time nor wish for family, but prefer having a mistress and spend their money in a pub. That's why I desided to take a try wia Internet. And the lats thing for today is about our little misunderstanding: then I desided to use the internet I 've found that I will neen the personal e-mail address. I did not knew how to get it and asked one friend of mine to help me. Julia handed it to me and now it's who are using it. That's all.Hope to hear from you soon.Have a nice day.Alla.

Letter 2

Dear Michael!
it' s very nice of you to write the answer for my previous wrathful letter! If you could know me better you would realise that I'm not wild and angry, but romantic and very optimistic! The biggest my shortcoming is that I can't stay silent than smb is trying to hurt me. I will never start fighting but will say everything I think. Maybe that's why you've desided I'm too philosophic.. Any way I was really glad to receive your letter and I'm glad that you still want to communicate and trust me. After sending you that letter I was afraidto lose you forever. You know, "the way to love anything is to realise that it may be lost". (G. K. Cesterton). I do not mean I love you already, but I like you much. From your style of writing I can realise that you are rather strong and self-confident man, you know what you're looking for and know how to get it. This is the first time I've met the man of this kind.
Now I want to tell you that I want very much to know you better and I hope that you will give me the chance.
Please write soon and tell me more about yourself, ask questions, i will be very glad to answer.
Sorry I need to go now.
Waiting to hear from you soon
Alla.

Letter 3

Dear Michael!
Yes, I've received your letter, and I've send you the answer, but the Internet-cafe, I'm using had some troubles on their server and the letter was lost. I am really very sorry, but I could do nothing... So, now I will write you another letter.
I am not sure about what you study in your colleges (will you please explain me???), but we work a lot with language: we study it's roots, it's origin and the ways of it's development(This subject is called The history of Ukrainian language). Also we study the modern Ukrainian (the rules of usage, exceptions of rules and so on), differences in regional language and a lot of other. Philological department deal with languages: we have Ukrainian (mine) and Roman ones.
Do you like theatre, or it was just for fun???
What books have left? Have you read all of them?? Are they all in English?? (There's the only plase in Luhansk, where one can take a real English book: Science Library....)
Now I will tell you a big secret: I really do not know English (only simple phrases). Everything you can read and I can write and understand from your letters is the result of my translator's work. Do not worry, I trust her: she is very nice lady and she is a teacher at the University. She wants to help me!!! I do not know if you'll understand why I've choosen such difficult way of correspondence (I mean the language barrier), but I do not think that it is very big problem: money is not the main, and if I want to keep in touch with you, I will do my best!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I promise you!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
I think that it is very important to take care of somebody, and I like your position about having a cat because of lack of time....)))
And thank you very much for understanding and sharing my position about young men and their life. Now I feel that you really understand me.......... I appresiate this...
You know every time than sending you e-mails I worry a bit about everything I've written. Do you think it's OK??
answer soon,
I'll be waiting....
Alla.
P.S. If you want, my last name is Tikhonova.

Letter 4

Dear Michael!
I am so happy to receive the letter from you! I thought that you've forgotten about me!!! Sorry, I was wrong!))))))
You know, here in Ukraine not everybody can earn computer, because it is very expencive and is used almost only for work or something of the kind... Internet cafe in our understanding is a little office there everybody can use Internet for a definite fee, it's not very expencive, for as long, as one want... Internet cafes may be different: some are big (having about ten computers), but most of them are little (three - five). The one I am using is very small: there are three computers, but they provide the translator. I've told you about my translator, she is a teacher at my University and also she works at the Internet-cafe, and it were she who told me about this place, because earlier I used another one... So, the system is: I come to the Internet cafe (here I pay for the time I spend in the web), I open my personal mail-box (it does not depend on Internet cafe), then I print my mail and give it to the translator. After converting I write the answer , give it to translator again and then go to my mail-box and type it... that's all.... the most difficult is to wait till the letter will be converted... I wish I could speak English myself... I would be able to write you letters any time I wish... and I would not have to pay money for translations.....
Sorry, I coul don write earlier, you know, my parents were here for the weekend and we've made a little birthday party. It'was very nice: my sister Olga was dancing and signing especially for me and she's made me a present: little doll she's sewn herself. I was to promise to make some clothes for her... We've named her Dolly.... I do not know why.... she's so funny.... They've leaved yesterday evening and I do not know whan I will see them again...... I miss them so much.... Now I feel so lonely in the city.....
I love to talk about my city... Now I mean Luhansk, because Krasnodon is far away from me... yes, I miss my folks, my friends and my dog,,, but I feel better here, in Luhansk.... I feel that here I am closer to you.... I have enough time to stay alone for to think about our future life..... There's a place next to the Railway station, it's called Park named after 1-st of May.... This park is very old and there are not much people now,,, but it's so romantic!!!!! In the evening, if I have some free time I go there and walk.... I was there yesterday... It was almost dark, and the folliage was rustling.... I wish you could walk next to me...I wish you could hold my arm..... If you will come to my place, we'll go there together, I promise!!! Another place I would like to tell you about is steppe. But it's difficult to walk there: we'll need to take a car.... Once or twice I was there with my friends, some kind of picnic.... At that moment I had a feeling that I am the only human at the Earth... I was wolking for a long time and still could not reach the horison.... I felt happy and free.... I hope you will like there!!!!! I think I will stop here for today,
Write me soon,
Alla.

Letter 5

Dear Michael!
Yes, it's me again)))) Again and again, because I see that you really understand me and do not want to forget about me)))) Thank you for your letters, for all of them!!! From you style of writing I can understand a lot of about you... I am just sure that my translator convert letters the same as you write....
You was asking about Russian and Ukrainian... no, it's not the same and Ukrainian is nodt dialect.. It's difficult to explain, ... these languages have the same roots , they have a lot in common, but still they are different... not like American and English, and not like English and French.... I do not know... they are similiar, but very different...
We have a lot in common, though we are almost strangers, we know almost nothing about each other and we are not together....
Sometimes life goes strange and surprising ways. We are away from each other, several 1000's of kilometers, but with email, we send greetings in a few minutes. Like our thoughts, they are free, don't know borders of countries or distance.
The pleasure to correspond with you is also on my side ! Of course, behind all is also something more serious, that let's me think about you often.Where are you???? Who are you???? You seem to have a wide soul. I do think so....Keep your dreams alive, Remember, that every changement in life starts with a dream.
Your personality, the soul of children, can be the reason to bring dreams into reality, in a way, that they don't loose it's magic and it's charm ...
What do you think of me, i hope that you take me seriously, i do want this to come true... I am waiting for your leter,
The girl from Ukraine who thinks of you!
Alla.
P.S. I am sending you the REAL photo, as you asked... It is rather old... It was my graduation.... Will you recognize me?????

Letter 6

Dear Michael!
Thank you for the letter, I am so sorry that I made you wiat for so long.... I wanted to write to you, but I had a problem and I will tell you about it..... it is really serious and I don't know how to tell you but I don't want to tell you lies and to tell you that I didn't have enough time to write to you or that I was very busy..... I was but I wanted to write to you and I had a serious obstacle..... Yes, I go to the Internet-cafe as I told you, I don't havea computer at home, and i can't write to you often..... but if it was only this...
Dear Michael, I even don't know how to explain it to you, maybe you woud decide not to write to me any more... i will understand of course....I tried not to write to you..... but now I can't help myself towrite to you.... I wanted this.... mayeb you would ask me why??? I don't know, I have fel that there is something in you.... in your letters.... that you are persistent.... that you care for me... i felt the warmness of your letters.... the desire to knoe me better..... you knw before nobody behaved like this..... I don't mean that nobody liked me.... but it was not because I was something special inside,,,, but only my outside qualities..... and because of this I decided to find a person who will liek me not for my appearence but for something more.... my heart.....
And I think that you did like this.... but unfortunately ......
I told you that I go to the Internet-cafe.... but have I told you that I am using a translation servise?
I knw that maybe it will scare you off.... I don't know English good enough to write to you by myself unfortunately, but I do want to learn English and I do want to comunicat with you.....
But it is only one problem..... the point is that translation servise is expensive for me, and I think that I can't afford it now, I am a student and I don't have such money..... that's why I haven't written to you so much, though I would liek to....
I still have some letters to you in Russian but they are not trans;ated into English as I can't afford it, it is too expensive for me( I should pay 4-5$ for every letter being translated for you, can you imagine this?), i hope that you understand me....Maybe I should have never told you this....But as I told you before I don't want to satrt anything with lies and on the other hand, I do want to correspond with you, but I can't afford it..... sad..... dissapointing.... but what can I do?
I am not asking for anything.... I have no right for this.... but if you really want to communicate with me, to be with me, to correspond with me and to see me .... if you are really serious....then will you help us to try?
I do want this, i am sure!I do want to know you better, to see you in the future.... I am tired of games, I want serious realtions!
Please write, I will look forward to your letter.....
I miss your letters...
Alla.

Letter 7

Dear Michael!
I feel so happy that you are still with me!!! I was sure that you are really the special for me... I had a hope and I was right!!!!
I really want to correspond with you and I will try to do my best for prolonging our frienship.... and even more!!!!
I am happy to know, that you are ready to tranlate the letters for me... You know, I believe that the usual mail may be the real way out in our situation, but I just afraid that ...... Do you know a lot about Ukaraine???? It's rather strange country and nobody can do something with this.... I just want to tell you that I will worry too much about the correspondence, but I hope everything will be OK. I want you to know the reason of my worry, for you were not surprised... I have a friend, Tatyana, she was my classmate, now she study in Kirovograd. We were very upse than she was to leave... I tried to write her letters as often as it was possible, but for a long time I have received just two letters from her... I was really upset and angry with her... but what could I do????? And when finally we've met in some months, I've understood that Ukrainian mail system is just terrible crazy and that one can hardly relay on it... It is really very sad story, but I've heard that sometimes people wait for several weeks for getting letter from the next sity....
I really hope that international mail system works much better, and I hope that I will not have to waitf for several weeks for every your letter!!!! I will worry too much!!! I want to have a try, and I really hope that we will prolong our beautiful relations, because I really think that you are special for me and I do not want to lose you!!!! I me so happy that you are ready to overcome our difficult situation, and I am so grateful that you have understand me!!!!
I will be waiting for your letter and I hope to hera fromyou soon,
Alla.
P.S. My mailing address is Ukraine, Luhansk, Zip code 91040, Vatutina Street, 93/51. (my landlady is very nice!!!!)I will be happy to get a card from you!!!!

Letter 8

Dear Michael!
You see that I am using translation service again.....
I was waiting for your letter, but I did not expext to get SUCH one. I am really very sorry, but the translation is terrible...
Do you want to offend me?????
I hope no!!!!
But I guess everything you undestrood from my previous letter is false... I wrote you with hope that you will help me, because I am ill, not my mother!!!! I have to go to hospital...
First I did not want to tell you, but I think that it will not be honest, I want to tell you everything, because I do not want to prolong our reations with any lies!!!! I want to trust you and I want you to trust me, that's why I must tell the truth.... I think that you must know everything, especially now, if something will happen to me...
I really do not want to think about bad things, but I guess I will have to............
Last two weeks I felt not very good, but I thought it was just a usual cold...Usually it finishes without any treatment in five days, but this time everything is very serious... Yesterday I had a temperature, 39C, and my landlady made me to call a doctor.... I hate doctors, thay always say something terrible.... I never go to hospital , because I am so afaid of any serious desease.... But I have do nothing... it's bronchytis.... and doctor says that now is the most dangerous time to get a pneumonia if not to treat me..... I really did not want to tell you this, but I know that you will understand me... I am afraid that it will be very serious, and I do not want something happen to me.... I... You know, my friend died three years ago because of pneumonia and I am so afraid.... I fell horrible and I do not really know what to do... And I know that nobody can help me now... I wish I would never ask you about such a thing .... but I really have nobody to help me... I have to stay in hospital at least for two weeks, and one week of treatment is about 150$... I feel ashamed that I have to tell you about my problems, but I know that you will worry anyway if I will not write to you, and you will not know that's happened to me.... I just know that you've become so close to me, and you behaved me as nobody did before, not only because my appereance, but my inner beauty... you said that I am special for you and that you want to see me in future next to you, we will help each other in our difficult times, and support each other..... I just feel that you are the real and the only one for me..... I feel that now we are much closer, and I know that everything will be the best for us, we just need to hope an support each other...
Now I really need your help and now is really difficult time for me.. I feel that you will understand me, because you are special and you are not passer-by for me..
Love,
Alla.