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Letter(s) from Anna Pavlova to Dennis (USA)
Hello my dear lovely Dennis.
As you lovely mine, Fine Dennis. How your affairs are? At work, houses, everywhere as to only you. As your relatives, friends live. Transfer all of them from me the big greetings, well? Tell them that I most Happy because has met in this life of you mine Dennis. I hope that you also treat to me? I am very strong you I like Dennis..., you in my heart... You know, I dream of us... I want to go with you under a huge black umbrella to hold you under a hand, am inquisitive peering in native eyes and reading in them caress And care... I want to see in your fine eyes passion, adoration under the relation to me. I want, that you devoured me with a sight, Want to thaw, flowing down together with drops of a rain on the ground. I love you as anybody another, want to give itself all and nothing To demand in exchange of you. I dream To engage with you love. I dream of that as we get rid with you of our clothes, Repeating the slightest movements. I shall drink a wine of your lips, Gradually getting drunk and any more not understanding, that I do make to be mad from Each your touch. I shall become your breath, your hands, your lips... My God, as I want it!.. We Let's be a single whole, a part of something fine, unearthly... I can continue to write to you about the dreams, at me it is a lot of them. I want that they were carried out only with you my lovely and more with anybody. Also I hope that there will step this time and we with ease We can tell each other how our love is strong, and certainly to carry out all our dreams in relation to each other, I am right? You agree with me?
MY RUSSIAN HOME ADDRESS: Ðîññèÿ, ãîðîä Êàçàíü, óëèöà: ïðîñïåêò ïîáåäû 126, êâàðòèðà 32.
Above all I want and wish to be with you Dennis - and to give you all of caress which I save only for you, the Tenderness and care - when it is necessary for you, when you in it need. You for me - boundless pleasure. With such words I would like to meet you, there would be it in my dreams, either in a reality, or in lines of my letter, hiding ocean, Not having coast, feelings. To you it was necessary when - that to feel in itself such feelings which would dement you which Would not give you rest which force at night which occupy all your time not leaving chance of that, That you might think about the friend. You know, it is similar to a solar eclipse, where in a role of the sun Your reason, and in a role of the moon, closing itself the sun, your not explained alarm taking place inside you. It is love........., I am right? You agree with me? The love, how many in this term disappears fine and dangerous. Whether you agree with me??
As it is a pity, that I only can write to you about that as strongly I love you. It would be desirable to express all this without words to express the eyes, to feel touches of tenderness of our hands. I hope it nevertheless soon will take place with us. I think that your feelings have the same originality as mine. You know, I never thought that I can on so much in the feelings. You may not present yourself on how many Sadly to me at present, From this long I pay, sitting at a window in darkness. She is similar alive... Cuts my eyes, Forcing me to shed tears, you know around of me as if all alive and it is all supplement my pity to yourself, I do not have not enough you, your words about love which you have lighted to me, your touch... I thank you for them, me never Was not so pleasantly and warmly from words. We now have blizzard, she is similar to my inwardness, whether you may present it? Wind and snow easily breaking conditions of rest.
Sitting at a window I present as from silence you will occur and both of us are immersed in sweet apparent To us of eternal minutes of pleasure the friend the friend. To reach madness in dance two souls loving each other. Even a blizzard Will seem only fine addition when we shall be near to you. I think that only loving people can stretch Instants of meetings and to stiffen in them and to count any gift of weather as addition fine, you agree with me Dennis. You and I, our merge at one ocean, ocean not having the depth, not having coast. Ocean having a place only in ours With you the worlds and only in our hearts. Similarity great will hold us in the strong and gentle hands.
P.S. You know... Yesterday at night I might not fall asleep. I thought of you. My heart cries. And I do not know how to appease the pain. You sense of all my life. I represented you and me. I looked in your eyes, a gentle skin, a magic smell of your body. I Blinked and felt, how you touch to me. I kiss you, whole your sensual lips, a neck. Also I feel, how Everyone Particle your body answers mine of caress. I know, you are created for me from the most light dreams. We have met again, and, it seems, life has gone in a new fashion. But I am afraid, that this life may pass without you. I can not lose You, I shall die without you, you understand me. You very much are necessary for me. You my life. You mean for me much. Promise me that always you will be with me. You give me hope, not promising anything. It reduces me from mind. What to me to do? I only can hope, that all our dreams will come true. All in your hands and my hands, I am right?
That you think of it. Write to me. Write the opinion, I shall wait.
Each time I with impatience and with deep excitement wait for your letter.
I love you Dennis, yours Anna
Hello my love Dennis!
I was again glad to see your letter. I am glad, that our correspondence has passed in more serious relations, and ours The desire, our feelings with each letter everyone become closer on closer, began to get more colourful of tone.
I want to tell you what if you really want that we spoke with you each day? I want to offer to connect to you the phone in my apartment where I live? What you think of it? I think, what during 2 weeks I shall spend money at a rate of Connections the phone on an apartment? You did not think of it? Then you may call to me each day and we shall talk so much, how many you will want it? The sum of connection of the phone on an apartment costs $560USD. I has only $80USD. you may to me the help with other sum of money. Simply I do not want you to put in awkward position. I think, that for us it on will be much more convenient and more economical.
It is pleasant for me to realize, that ours warm relations waken in us good mood which helps to us at grey and monophonic daily occurrence. I hope, that you of the same opinion. Today we had cloudy and wind weather. It reminds me about long in which there are particles of uncertain desire. The desires which are carrying away me from this grey weather, in dreams filled heat........
In you there were such desires?
In such weather I like to be at home and to observe all this from the window. It gives sensations of security,not availability, remoteness from all it. Let it is imagination, but imagination bringing positive emotions,warming my lonely ideas. And transmitting vivacity to my hopes and dreams. What weather today surrounds you? Also what she reminds you? What ideas visit you at this moment?
To me would like to find out you on much better, therefore as you estimate the situations occurbing to you and around of you. I think, that the most effective way to find out the person - it knowledge on his acts therefore as he may to reflect in this or that situation. You agree with me? Also I think, that all close relations between two people first of all are under construction on respect, sincerity and trust. These three qualities define initial steps more serious and deep feelings. Feelings of love. Losing one of these qualities gives a push to that the person begins to be afraid to state all that is present at sincerity of his heart. Loss of one of these qualities, in my opinion,releases in a precipice of doubts and coolings of relations between two people. And that similar has not taken place, it is necessary to be sure that you really feel, something, on the relation to someone.
Write to me please, what you think of it, what your opinion? It will be very interesting to me to know, that you think about it. You likely have noticed, that I like to think, represent, dream, connect the imaginations to a reality many. The similar reasoning and to force itself to think, to me has given my dialogue with my girlfriends. When we gathered together,we liked to share about that about what we think to share our ideas.
To discuss problems of our daily life. Recently we see them very little. On this to find myself constantly thinking I already have got used. I think,that, the thinking similar enables me to peer into the desires in more detail.
As I still has not enough time, I want to finish the letter. To me would like to find out, that our relations more soon are really real and receive answers on given by me to you questions.
I shall wait for your fast reply. Yours faithfully, Anna.
Forgive, my dear, that did not write, I had a misfortune, my mum was run over by a car. She has gone to shop at night, she was brought down with the machine. She has lain on ice near hour while her have not found Passers - by. In hospital she has acted with is frost-bitten bodies over 60 %. Now she requires operation, in To change of the top cover of a leather. Also during impact she has injured a backbone, on operation to her It is required 4500 euros. we with my daddy have taken the loan on 3000 euros, medicines are necessary for us. My mum Is in hospital in Kazan as it is most nearest of polyclinics which can replace Leather. My mum is paralysed. Investigation is conducted. But while these vermins have not found. I do not know, that To me to make. We need to give in 5 months 3000 and on treatment 1500, otherwise we Let's lose an apartment, my parents will stay without habitation, that my mum is sick. I do not ask from you The financial help. If you have opportunity, for God's sake, send me medicines if at you is Opportunity it to make, I shall write to you the list of the medicines necessary for treatment. For the sake of our love, Help me! Forgive me, that I deliver to you troubles. But me any more to whom to address.
My love, I is more most likely can not to visit Internet of cafe, but I shall try it to make. For the sake of Our love, do not forget me, you the most fine, that was at me in life, I can not live without you, And me it is very sad, that we with you may not be together. You could support me help me, To calm, forgive me. I very much love you.
I did not sleep two day, I sat at a bed of mum, I do not want to live, why it happened with me? Why?
My life any more has no sense. I do not know where to find such work, to give such The sum. I in despair. I want you to ask, it is very difficult for speaking me, but I am afraid, that to me It is necessary to go to sell the body for money to begin the girl of easy behaviour, I about it never I shall tell to the parents, but I do not have more choice. I searched for work, but at all desire I can not To render the required help to my mum. Forgive me for it. I love you... Forgive. I of it very much I am afraid, as I protected the innocence for the only thing, for loved. I very much it I am afraid, but I do not have choice. Forgive, forgive... Good-bye my love, and once again forgive..
I have not enough time? My mum is sick. Operation is necessary for her.
I do not know that to me to do and how to be. My father began completely to anothers.
You know that in Russia there were frosts? She has fallen and has lost consciousness.
At her heavy îòèîðîæåíèå from for low òåìïåðàòðó these days?
We tried and have found near 2000EURO, but it is not enough.
It is necessary still near 1500EURO.
I am occupied with searches of money and I hope, that you understand my condition.
I shall write to you as soon as I can?