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Letter(s) from Olga Vasileva to John (USA)
Thank you that you replied! Friendly speaking I feel a bit confused, because its the first i decided to try internet!and I even don't know what to start writing to you with... Well, I will start from the very beginning. My name is Olga and I live in a small Russian town which is called Orshanka. This is a very nice place especially in summer and there are a lot of good people here. I was born on the the 15 of January.
I am 26 years old, and I think that this is very nice age to start new life! I work in hospital, and I am a children doctor by profession. I love children and this is very pleasant to deal with them. My work is rather interesting, but it is not easy, because very often I am responsible for a kid's life and this is hard to be responsible for such a serious matter! But I am in my place and I think that I would never change my work even if I was offered a million dollars! and what is about you? Tell me what you are and what your ambitions are in life!
I was born not in Russia but in Belarussia, so originally i'm from there. Right after finishing school I entered the medical University here in Russia, which was located in Kazan (my parents couldn't pay for my studies and i had to come, study and live here, so i could get a profession) and after graduating from it ( I am not showing off, but I am proud to tell you that I graduated with honors!) I was offered a vacancy in our Hospital in Orshanka, which is not far from the the capital of Mari republic. I agreed without thinking it over, because I thought that this is my thing and I was not mistaken, because i never felt pity about my choice since.
No much changed from that time, but one day I realized that I am tired of life here, tired of being alone and tired of the same faces. My close friend, she is now in America, she found her love on the dating site,they decided to meet and they liked each other so much that she didnt want to come back here any more. I'm so happy for her, she changed to the best and we are writing emails to each other. She repeats telling me that i have to put my photo in international dating site and i might meet my prince! One evening when i was walking home after the night in the hospital, I saw the internet cafe and decided to come and ask if i can use internet there. I don't have a computer at home and decided to try, I took some photos and wrote some words about me and put them on the dating site that she told me. So here i am writing to you I don't know what it will lead me to, but at the moment I feel very interested in you! please, write me more about yourself and don't forget to send me your photo! I will look forward to your answer and will come here tomorrow again!
with my best regards,
HI dear John!
To tell you the truth I am very pleased that you answered me back so quickly, because I waited your answer with impations!
I still can't get used that that quick internet letters! It seems unbelievable that only a few years ago people wrote letters in hand and waited the answer for weeks! By the way in Russia the internet post is still not very widely spread and I myself write letters to some of me old friends by usual mail. But this is great that I can get the answer from you in no time. and I hope that if we will go on like that we will manage to know each other very good! :)
I don't know but i like how you write, it's so easy and interesting to read, i know writing letters is not the same as talking on the phone for example and for some people its just seems boring, i can agree it can be, but not writing to you now. When i read your letter i realize that you are so far away from me now, it's unbelievable because i don't feel that distance because i imagine all the things that you tell me.
John it's interesting to know that you have talked to the russian girl before, i havent talked to an american before... first of all i want to say at once that i'm here not to play games, i want to find a man with whom i could create a family, be a good wife too, if i didn't have that dream i would be quiet happy with a Russian man, but here men dont like to take responsibility they just escape from it.I can understand if you don't believe in internet dating, but what if your half is far away from you and is also suffering, trying to be happy? i think that sometimes it's better to live alone then with somebody you have no feeling, no warmth to!It's important to find your soul mate, a person whom you can trust! I know there are so mean people in this cruel world and actually i really don't want to be hurt in love also, i really want to get to know you well and who knows may be we have been looking for each other? I believe in real love, I think that when you love, you don't ask anything back you just love!! Do you think the same?
Your letter really touched my soul there is something very exciting about it, i like your honesty, i like how you talk about the things, and i think that we may be far away in distance,but what is more important is how much we can understand each other, how much in common we have and how much we could trust each other. i think everything is possible if two people are for each other!Why am i searching for it not in Russia it's a simple, because life in Russia has become too dangerous, men seem to have lost moral values and nobody wants to take any responsibility. And all i want to have is a nice, loving husband, kids, good safe family life and no betrays and lies..i just have been too naive and was hoping to find such man here but i go only hurt. I don't want this to happen again, i really dont! I really hope that we can learn more about each other and if we are for each other, even meet in future, I think it's very important.
John wish i could know more about your country, about the way people live there, i know traditions, values must be so different. Because i watch TV i know some stuff but to see it with your own eyes must be very very different! Tell me did you travel a lot? I'm happy that i know English well enough to talk to you, i studied it very well when i was studying in college!
All my life i could only dream about travelling abroad, i could never afford it to myself because i 'm just a doctor and doctors get paid very bad in Russia...well lets not talk about sad things ok? i'm really happy being able to answer to your nice letter! Reading your letter makes me feel very warm, i love that we can be be open to each other and that we can learn more about each other, because we both want to be loved and cared,we want to find our half. I'm so glad that you have serious intentions because i dont' want to play games here, i want to hope that i can find the love of my life.
Please tell me more about the way you live what you like doing? What you are looking for in woman?
Just one thing i want to tell, is that if i love a man i would never ever betray him, lie to him and family is very important to me, i was raised in a very good family, with strong moral values and i have a very good example my parents who are happy with each other.
Please could you tell me more about your everyday life, do you have much free time? You see i don't have a computer at home that why to read and write you letter i have to come to the Internet cafe which i will try to do more often now, as will be waiting for your letters. Please dont think that i don't do the chores at all, i do all cooking, cleaning and sometimes even repairing, because i don't have a man in the house. I didn't have a boyfriend for 2 years already. I just spend to much time at hospital and do you spend a lot of time at work?
Working in the hospital takes a lot of time, but I feel that it's my job and i really like to be able to help people! But that not the only reason why i became a doctor. I love kids. I think I would have a small boy, who I would take care of. But I didn't meet a man who would be worthy to be the father of my kid, that's why I don't have my own one. But I really adore kids and I know the way with them. I can calm them down when even mothers can do nothing. I don't know why, but sometimes it seems to me that I know what the kid think about at the moment, I can guess when he is unhappy and why he is sad. I just feel it and the words I need come to me themselves, the kid also feel that I am not just a silly grown-up,but his friend. Tell me would you want to have kids? If not I can understand it!
Well i guess i have to finish my letter now, don't want to bore you, just will be waitign for your letter impationately!
Hi dear John!
That was an amazing letter from you, that's what i was looking for also! I don't want to pretend and act like somebody that i'm not, i don't want to show that i don't care about something when i really care, i want to kiss when i want to kiss you:)but not only wait till you kiss me,i think that what is close relation and mutual understanding is about! Yes we all had experience before with attractian and simpathy to eachother but you just feel when something just is not right....:) in our case i'm so happy that you want the same things as me and actually i could already imagine our meeting in real, like to go to the movies or have a cup of tea...oh i forgot to tell you I'm sorry that I couldn't come to the internet cafe earlier,just they very often delay our salary and that's why sometimes i'm just short of money but now that we met, I will try to come here as often as possible ok?
I was thinking and trying to guess of what you will write me today!!! probably this is a bit silly of me, but I read what you wrote me several times before starting to answer. I think that you can write me everything you want, because I feel friendly sympathy to you and I am happy with every passing day I discover something new in you! So you told me that it's very nice to live in the USA and i do believe you, for example my friend, she is trullly really happy there and i'm sure if i was in the same situation i would do all my best to get used to new enviroment, if of course my only man was with me and helped me! How is the weather over there now? Here today it was very good, the sun shied brightly and the birds are singing cheerfully in the air. I wish I were a bird, to have no problems but to sing and to enjoy life!
I didnt have much work today, and this is good, because I could come earlier to the internet cafe to write you a letter and tonight I have time to cook something delicious because my girlfriends are going to visit me tonight! I think I will make a cake, a magnificent cake! I wish I could treat you to it!
What are you favorite dishes??? tell me, please, I will try to find the recepies and will learn how to prepare it! it will be a nice piece in my collection, I suppose! My best friend she will come too, she is working in my hospital too. I don't have a lot of friends, but those I have are true and I am sure that I can rely on it. by the way what is your attitude to friendship? I hear that in western countries such term as friendship is not popular, all people are living their own lives and they don't have such friends who are ready to help them in difficult life situations. But I appreciate friendship very much and I am sure that every person must have friends... do you have friends?
You know what I am looking for in man-I know that there are no ideal people, I just want to have somebody who is close to me in spirit, whom I can trust and with whom we could be in harmony.
I want him to know what he wants and be honest.
I feel that we have very much in common and though we know each other for a short period of time I feel close to you... but ok, it is too early to talk about something after some letters that we have wrote each other. let's go on and we will see what it will lead us to, ok?
Sweetie you know i would love to talk to you on the phone one day, its so exciting!!
i don't have a phone at home because I'm renting a flat and it would be very expensive for me to install it there. But John,i know your phone number and i know that there is a international calling center, i just have to buy a card and i can just come there and call you any time? I will do that as soon as possible ok sweetie and i want to make you a surprise with my call so we both know that we are real:) Please tell me what is exact time difference between us, i really don't want to wake you up in the middle of the night...I like you so much!!
so, I am finishing and will go home now,
in the picture it's me while the repairing in our hospital, we did everything with our own hands!!!
Hi my dear John!
I just read your letters and i feel like I have met a real prince! Now i think that it's possible because im talking to you and i have never felt so comfortable talking to a man.
I just so much appreciate your views, your values and i caught myself at a thought that i would be so happy with such a man like you! I don't want to hurry with my decisions, but my heart is already beating faster when i read a letter from you, that's a sign...just from now on, i want us to talk more about what we feel, because for me this is the most important. I want us to have no secrets and i want you to know everything about me.
I don't want to have any secrets from you and i don't want you to think that i'm hiding from you something, i'm just a simple girl who wants some happiness, some respect and true love. i brought my ID today to the internet cafe and that's why it took me so long today to write you a letter, can you imagine they refused to help me to send it via internet, they told me it's not safe to send the scanned documents throught internet because of heckers, i don't who they are but i guess it's something dangerous!
Sweet what shall we do than? I wanted to call you on the phone this coming weekend what do you think about it?? i would so much love to hear your voice!Also i want you to know the real reason why i decided to try internet dating and why i don't want to create a family in this country...already for my 26 years i learnt that you can't trust anyone because everybody became so independent, so offensive and people always want to take advantage of the others, i understand it so much because i have been taken advantage of, i lived with the man that i thought loved me and cared about me, he told me that i'm his only woman and he doesn't want to marry yet because he doesnt' have enough money for marriage. So we lived togehter and of course we had common money, i cooked and cleaned the house, i did everything, justi thougth that he really values me as a person he sees a future wife in me...but then he told me that we need a break so we can think over everything...first it was 2 weeks that i didnt see him, then it was month when i saw him kissing with another girl in the street..and he said that he will never leave me, what a liar he was ...i cried so much, i felt so misrable you can't imagine...i understand now that i should have noticed that i have been used, but i didn't have any other close person at that time, i thought that he was my fate...i realise now that it wasn't love, may be some affection or passion but not more then that...I'm sorry about telling you all the truth but i think that you should know it and you should know what a big step i'm taking now talking to you, i start to trust you, i feel that i know you already and i feel what kind of person you are and i know that you are different and you have no point lying to me. In my soul, I feel contentment and joy when I think of you. I hope that my words and letters mean something to you, but they are much more than mere words, they are my thoughts and feelings, and I send them out to you. I have so much that I wish to share with you, and each time I write to you, I feel there is never enough time to say everything that I want to say, and I always feel that I have forgotten something important that I wanted to share with you. You are very interesting person with high intelligence and sense of humor. I think many women try to win your heart. I understand it now that you may doubt what i say to you, may be you think that it's just words because of some bad stories that you know and i know. Each one of us can doubt who we are but i want to listen to my heart now!
there are many bad people in the world and you can't trust any one completely, but i know that after some dark period in life there should be some sun, and i feel that you are my sun!! I think only after our meeting we can be trully sure of each other and i would be so happy if you could come and rescue me from here like in a fairy tale, but i wouldnt want to live in Russia, and after visiting Russia you might have a shock because everything is so different here and not safe at all... Just the way you describe life in your country makes me want to see it with my own eyes!! I want to see your house, how you live, in fact i so often imagine myself there, how would it be? You know i guess there are some ways for me to travel to you, and i just have to find out more about it,i just hope it's not way too expensive, because remember that i'm just a child's doctor and how little i earn:)
well i will be waiting so much for your letter, please write me what you think about...i really can't wait to hear from you!
with lots of kisses
HI my dear John!
I feel so warm reading your letter today, just now i wish i had a computer at home and i could write you as much as you write and share with you like you share with me! and how much i want to be next to you now...sweet i feel exactly the same, just i was a little shy to tell,i want to have a real date as soon as possible ... Thank you for being sincere to me, i so much want to be with you now, i'm sure we would be able to be such a support for eachtoher, just please let the past be past ok? Yes i already feel that my heart is open to you!i had a dream about us, it was so nice, but i'm bit shy to tell you ,do you want to know it?
Sweet,you can't imagine how nice i feel now,i want to take this letter and have it always with me, because there is so much warmth,care in it, which i miss so much, my dear i'm sorry that i can't write you as much, because i'm in the Internet cafe my dear and i have limited time, but please don't think that i just don't care or anything ok?
Honey i have never ever met such a man like you in my life, who would look for the same thing as me who would care about me and who would be interested in me like you are now, you are intelligent and very kind and I feel so good now, i feel that we have a connection and i'm not lonely anymore!sweetie please dont think that it's just a correspondence for me, no, i feel that in you i found me true soul mate and i want you to know everything about me now, i want us to have a chance to see we are for eachother and why not sweetie, distance doesn't matter right? I so much agree that we would have so much to talk about when we met in real! i'm actually very excited about this idea. i thought there were no decent men left in the world, and then i get your letter and the world change for me, when i finished reading your very first letter my heart has stopped for a second and i felt like I have been missing you in my life, did you ever had something like that?
The life is short and if we really like eachtoher,why can't we just meet and get to know each other better and may be never ever part again? I would so much love it. I haven't been to the travelling office yet, but i will go there as soon as we talk on the phone, because i have so questions to you. I plan to call you on Saturday, so i hope i wont wake you up!
John, i'm very excited now, because i feel that something great is going to happen to us, i have such a temptation now, i want to know more about you, please tell me more about your everyday life, what do you like doing, your likes and dislikes? Well my life here now is mostly connected with hospital and i spend so much time there! I always wait for weekends with impatience, because I get tired mentally and physically at the work. That's why weekends are the only possibility for me to rest and to get new forces. ON the weekends sometimes I want simply to rest in my apartment. I like my apartment - little and cosy. On weekends I always clean the apartment properly. I like purity. And though I always try to keep my apartment clean, there is always something to do about the house on weekends:) that's how it just goes! But when I want really to relax I listen to music or read books.
I would really want to be a good wife for my husband and mother for my kids and if it was needed for me to work, of course i would work, because here in Russia all women work and work a lot! And what would you want your wife to do? How would you imagine our life together, have you thought of this? i have to find out about travelling to you!
Well sweetie please write me as soon as you can,how was your meeting with your friends? what did you do? i will come here as soon as i can , ok?
I will be waiting for your letter,
My love John!
I don't know how to tell you but i'm afraid i'm totally in love with you, it's crazy but i have never been so close to anyone and i have never felt anything like this to anyone in my life as i feel now towards you! Honey you know i realize now that i have met a lot of people in my life, i met a lot of good and nice men and i could have another future....but i'm so happy that it didn't happen my prince! My heart tells me now that's it's you and i trust you so much, I want us to never part and i can't stop the feeling that is growing inside of me! I more and more trust you and i know you so well even though our meeting in real is ahead of us! I'm touched to tears that you want to help me with the money because yesterday evening i was thinking already of the ways how to get it to come to you, because i know that this meeting will change our lives and i'm ready to do what it needs..sweetie thank you, i hope that everything will be ok and i will be able to return this money to you, because i'm working and i'm earning some money right? Sweet and how will you be able to help me with the money if i'm so far away?
I got your letter today in the morning and i had to go to the tourist office again today so i could verify information concerning the prices. The visa and the international passport are 790 US dollars. As for the tickets, i said that i want to fly approximately in the middle of July is it ok sweetie? They told me that i will have to book round trip tickets as it is required for all tourists leaving for USA. So the tickets they found for me Moscow-Orlando are available. Tickets with insurance and tourist plan will cost me 1530 US dollars sweetie.
Well sweetie if we could do that, if we could find the money for my trip i can already apply for the visa next week. I asked why the visa and passport cost so much and they told me that the visa and passport cost so much because i live far from Moscow and they will do all the transportation for me, so i will only have to pick the visa up in the Embassy!
My vacation is really soon and i already have the feeling of our meeting, I'm so so happy you can't imagine! I read your last later about the waitress, sweet....i'm so jealous now, i know you are a handsome man and i know girls are looking at you, but now we have to be patient and wait for each other ok?? I have to think what i will need to bring with me and i also want to bring something Russian, some souvenirs for your family, friends may be? what would you want me to bring from Russia, may be you always wanted something? You know as for me i have one dream, please tell me can we go ice skating? And also my love, please tell me will i be able to find a job there so i could pay you all the money back that we need now for my trip? Even thought you tell me that it will be a gift any way i feel a bit shy about you helping me!
Well sweetie i have to finish my letter now, my cousin called my neighbors today in the morning and i think she is going to have a baby very soon,approximately on Thursday. Isn't it great?? i'm so happy for her i will probably have to go help her:)
My love almost forgot again to write you my contact details, my full name is Olga Vasileva
i live in 12- Sovetskaya street,5, Orshanka, Mari El, Russia 424000
and write me your information sweetie also? By the way please tell me how are you going to help me with the money? Just please dont send it by regular post, it's not safe at all!
So i will imagine your warm kiss and will be thinking of you all day long!!!
How are you today my dear, first of all thank you so much that you were honest with and you told me what you felt and the things that you are worried about now... Yes John i know that we know eachother only for such a little time and all this stories are going around. You said that you saw my name somewhere on the internet and you know what my love, i cant be responsible for all the girls holding a name Olga and surname Vasileva, there are hundreds of them across Russia and if you will ask some russian person they will tell you that my name is the most common in our country and surname also, oh no, wait i think Olga Ivanova combination would be more popular then mine...it's all very sad sweetie that you have start checking me. I remember our talk on the phone, i could feel you through the phone receiver, your spirit and your mood and now you are telling me that you want to check me...i agree that by taking a decision to connect our lives we both take a risk but we already have so much in common that it's just easy for us to talk and to share! I told you that im not rich and i earn little, but i didnt' want you to think that i'm complaining or i try to make you feel pity for me. PLease believe me it's not the money that make me happy, i love my job, i love my friends and if i had my other half near me i would be completely happy! And you have just put me in such position: "Proove me that i'm real and then i will think if i will help you or not to get to America" Sweetie that's very humiliating, i dont' know what other women talked to you about, i see now that they just wanted money from you...they sent you at once their passports? They did everything to make you sure that they are who they are and make you pay for them? Sweet you are not like that i know man, for me you are a very reasonable and very smart person, but don't think of me like about one of that women that pretend they love men only because of money. I am not going to proove you that i have an ID that i have my medical diploma and that i work in hospital. I am who i say i am and i want you to take me to trust me as i trust everything you tell me about yourself, that i trust the pictures of your gorgeous house that you sent me. I called you on the phone, i went to the calling center just because you didnt' believe that i'm real and what will be next, you will ask me to show my pictures in bikini?? We are in equal position now, i can doubt everything you tell me and catch at every uncertainty...i actually couldnt even imagine that you could doubt what i tell you in my letter..honey i never did anything bad to any one and i live honestly , i know that money can't make person happy! that is my first time on the dating site and i really like you, i believe you and i would never think that you could do bad things to me..and know you suspect me into somethin..I have heard about such stories, bad people are all over the world now and the reason of it i think is that people don't want to earn money them selves they better steal it from someone. I have heard that it's guys who do that not girls though. I don't have any point to lie or ask you for money, i'm here in internet to find my other half and be happy with him.I earn money teaching kids at school and even though what i get is miserable comparing to salaries in States i'm proud of what i do. I bring such beautiful language as English to people and when they enjoy it, they know it it's my pleasure.i have heard about such women in internet also, but i 'm here because i know a real story, when my friend, she is 30 years old found her love just like this and very happy now..i dont' know how to tell you but i really believe that my half is not here and i 'm looking for different things then men here and i really ant someone who is mature enough to realise it...that's all i can tell, and if you don't beliebe my letters, my feelings to you, then it breaks my heart that the world became so hectic and so cruel that they are no place for true things any more. It's the first time in my life i met a man that i really like and feel close to and it's breaking my heart to think now that you don't believe you think that i'm lying to you. Just I decided to give it a try, to let my heart believe again... May be you dont want to take such a risk and i will understand but one thing you will defenitely loose, a real woman on the internet because only now i realise how many fake people are on internet... I want us to see eachother and i want us to do it with a light heart but not the heart full of doubts. Today in the internet cafe i found out that there is such system as yahoo messenger where we can talk, and now i will try to sign in there to talk to you. SO if you get this letter now, please write me at once and tell me what is your id there?i will be waiting for you and there we can talk about everything
Hi my sweet John!
I'm reading your email now and the key word in it is money, that should not be like this! You said that you are not asking me for anything you are my love, it's you who i will be coming to and it's going to change my life completely. I have fallen in love with you and right now i think that i will never ever find a man like you in my life, with so much energy, inside beauty and reasonable as you are! And when i read our letter i am so sad to realise that we have become conserned about this money matter and everything depends on it now, but it's not true! I like you for who you are and if you are not comfortable with helping me with my trip please dont do it! You are right, trust is earned and it cant appear in a week and you know i see how important for you to see my documents to believe me and i will find a way to send you a copy! I'm sorry i just felt humiliated when you first wrote me that you want to see a proof... but if it is so important to you, i will do it! Sweet tomorrow morning i'm leaving to see my cousin, she has been put in the hospital already, do you remember i told you that she is expecting a baby? Well it is coming very soon and i have to be there with her. I might not be able to check my email for a while but dont worry as soon as i come back i am going to write you and tell you how everything was! YOu cant imagine how much i want my own baby...well i know its all only my dreams for now:)
I love you and i will miss you so much and as i promised when i come back i will find a way to scan my passport and send it to you!
Yours always Olga
My love my darling how are you?
I just got back home today afternoon! I spend so many days at my cousin's house helping her and her husband with a new-born baby!! He is so so cute, its a boy!! WEll the parents are also so happy!
Sweet i hope that you haven't lost me as i'm here and there was only one short letter from you and that's all, i hope that you have the same feelings towards me still, because nothing has changed from my side I'm reading your letters over again, i so much enjoy doing it but i know that when i come home tonight i will feel so lonely...because we are so far away from eachother and at the same time so close!! It shouldn't be like this it's not fair! i don't know why, i just realized how much you mean to me and how much senseless was my life without you... Yes sweet, i want to see you in real as soon as possible, i can't wait for it already, i want to come to you so we can finally have our first love date, your letters, your wonderful voice, now it's all one for me,the man i want to be with, the man who loves me, understands me, supports me, you my prince! we have already waited for so long, we were alone and suffering because we didn't have each other and now it's different, i feel that we are for each other and now i know that we will be together soon!
I feel so lonely without you in the evenings when i come home from work!!!I try to busy myself doing something just not to think about that distance between us.. how are you there?And what are you doing my darling? You are probably so tired when you get home and what do you do please tell me? what do you cook for yourself? Oh i forgot to say, my cousin says hi to you John, i told her so many good things about you! She said that i definitely changed for the past time and of course i did i'm totally in love and i'm ready to smile all day long just because i know that you think of me you care about me, I love you John!
Sweet i'm writing you from my friends computer now and i'm going to send you a copy of my passport today. That's all i can do to prove you that i'm real and i'm ready to do that. I wanted to ask you what shall we do next? We will have a lot to take care about but i know that we will manage it, sweetie!I want to get you something special as a present. Please don't worry honey, i love making presents and now i will have some time before my trip, i would make you a present with my own hands, I like to do it when i have free time but dont' worry my love i we have all our life ahead of us and everything we will share together! Honey i just wanted to tell you thank you again, you can make me feel so special even you are so far away, i feel so protected now, i know that I can trust you and it's a great feeling and i want you to trust me also, i have made a decision and i'm ready to do what it needs.
HOney my love i will go now.i will come to the internet cafe tomorrow so please write me becuase i miss you so much already Just please be honest with me,don't hide your feelings please let me know, i'm being open with you, i want you to share with me also!
Kiss you my sweetie, and please wait till i come ok?
I love you kiss you