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Letter(s) from Ulyana Byharena to Padnur (USA)
Hi! I'm so happy to receive your reply! It was good to meet you on dating site! You made my day! Why I chose you? I found you at the site by chance. Telling from the beginning of the story I know a woman who is on a dating site. That profile wasn't mine, it was a profile of that woman, but she let me find someone from the dating site from her profile. I don't know how to use the site, so I found you by chance and wrote you. I didn't know what will happen, I didn't know if you write me or not. But I am glad that we met each other. I've never tried to find someone in Internet but soon I will come to your country to work there, so I will have a work visa and a permission to work. My friend worked in the USA somewhere near Fort Lauderdale two years ago. She worked in amusement park from 11 am till 6 pm and from 7 pm till 3 am she worked in a bar. Of course she was always tired but she made very good money! I think I can do it too! Now she is in Europe, working for 3 months. She wrote me she liked to work in the USA better! I want to find a man who can tell me about the life over there and maybe of course something more then just a friend!!! I don't have a boyfriend so I'm open and ready for new adventures!!! I'm in Russia now, but soon I will leave Russia to make my trip so you can forget about our distance. I've never been abroad, only in the South of Russia, the Black Sea, Sochi (where probably will be Olympic Games). I like warm climate )) According to my visa I can work in your country for 3 months, I can prolong it to 6 months if I want. After 6 months staying over there I can go home or try to get a green card. I think my level of English is not so bad, but still it is very simple. I can't read philosophy books in English or business books))) Anyway I want to improve my English while staying over there. I write and speak English by myself. We have Discovery channel here in English (my friend has cable TV, so I come to watch it!). I like this channel so much! Very interesting! I'm sending two pics, I hope you will like them. I will send more next time. I live in small town here in Russia, and I decided to find someone by Internet not to be alone when I make my trip. The life is different in every country and I think it's hard to live there when you don't know anybody. I can do some simple job as a waitress, or to work in some shop. And later when I improve my English I want to find a better job! I will start my trip from Moscow, I will go there to pass English tests and have an interview. I think everything will be OK! Working program helps me to get the visa, permission for work and all travel documents and they will help me to get job. It's a special program for young people who is not lazy and make some money. Also they can settle me with another girls from Russia and Brazil who came to work there too, it's very cheap. Here I can earn only about 100-150$ a month to work from mornig till late evening (my city is really small). I think I can change my life and see many wonderful things and just different life. I am full of plans and different dreams. I am sure you will be not disappointed to meet me in real life!!! I don't have a special plan or something like that for a new relationship, I'm open to everything! I don't want to be an abuse for you, if you don't want me as your woman, we can be just friends! But I hope you'll like me and my photos! I had a boyfriend, but it was nothing serious and we broke up one year ago because he moved to Vladivostok. OK, I will finish this email... I don't know what else I could write you in my first email. Please reply to me even if you don't like me, because you are the only man I am responding to. If you don't like me I will continue my search. I hope so much to receive your answer!!! I hope we can have a nice communication by emails so I will know somebody is waiting for me over there! Not so long time to wait for me, really!!! I hope you are my soulmate and we can match each other! Tell me about yourself and the place where you live! And send me photos! Sorry for being too talkative!!! Please write me back here, I write you from my private email address now. Iraida
Sunil, hello!!! Thanks for your reply so much!!! Thanks for the nice photos, you look handsome. I hope soon I will be able to come to your area by my birthday and we will meet each other! This time I will write you more about myself. I think you should know more about my life and my hobbies so you will know if we have any common interests. So you already know my first name Iraida. My last name is Anphalova. I'm 27 years old, not that young I suppose? My birthday is on 12 August. I'm 168 cm tall (5.6.) and 51 kg weight (about 120 pounds, I'm not sure how much it is in pound but I'm not fat which you can see from my photos!). I don't know exactly my bust-waist-hips measurements, I don't have a reason to measure it because I think it's OK and my body is proportionate )) I take care of my body, I do aerobics three times a week and two times a week I go to a swimming pool. I have an older sister, you can see her with me on photos. She is 31 years old now. She recently divorced and she had 4 years old daughter. Her husband cheated on her. We live with our parents in 3 room apartment. The name of my city is Bratsk, it's near Irkutsk city. Bratsk is quite small city unlike Irkutsk which is a large city, the main city in our district. Have you ever heard about the lake Baykal? It's near Irkutsk! It's the deepest and cleanest lake in the whole world. It's very beautiful! I graduated from Irkutsk Humanitarian University two years ago, the dance faculty. Yes, we have such faculty in Humanitarian University! So I'm a professional dancer. I don't want to have a dancer's career because I will have not much time for my private life and for relationship with a man. I work as a dance teacher, I teach children from 12 to 17 years how to dance! Also I have a certificate of fitness instructor, this is my another hobby. So it would be perfect if later I can find a work as a fitness instructor or teacher of dances!!! I think it's a very good job for a woman, I'm always in a good shape and I keep myself not that busy! Do you know how to dance? If not I can teach you! I can dance many different styles. When I come to your city I will work as a waitress in a restaurant. I would like to work as a dance teacher but I think you understand it's not possible to arrange such work by Internet because they want to see the level of my dancing. Anyway I will try to find this kind of work when I come over there. Or maybe not a dancer but aerobic( fitness) instructor, I think it's also very good job. I'm sending few photos for you today! I hope you are not tired to look at my photos? First two pics were taken in Sochi (the Black Sea) last summer. The next two pics were taken during New Year's holidays while we were shopping for presents with my sister. In winter I like skiing, although we have cold winters... our summers are warm usually. Mom is much younger then my father and they are very happy together. My mother is a teacher of music in the school. I can play piano also, she tought me to play piano. I finished music school and I still play piano about once a week. My father is retired engineer. I cannot say I enjoy one particular type of music. It might sound strange for you but I can listen to almost everything. The list is endless actually. But anyway, there are a couple of things I have always enjoyed to listen to. They are Enigma and Deep Forest. I adore their music. It is so sensual and helps relax a lot. I also like classic music, jazz, rock, lounge. I want to try how to ride a motorcycle someday! I've never tried it! By the way, do you have an International Airport in your city? Please write me the name and the code of it. Or write me the name of the nearest airport to you. I write you my emails from Internet cafe, I don't have my own computer. I suppose in few days I will leave for Moscow and start my trip! There is no any messenger in this Cafe so we can only keep emailing each other. I hope you are not getting bored to read my emails? My address here is Russia, Bratsk, Gagarina 54 street, flat 6. So now you know who I am.... I just can tell you that I enjoy life and I try to live to the fullest, I like to try new things. I'm not that smart.. I was not that good in mathematics, physics, biology and so on! But I'm very tender, caring, artistic, faithful, decent person. Sometimes I can be not well organized, I think everybody had it's own minuses and pluses. I don't look for any special qualities in a man. I just hope he will be faithful to me and ready to create a happy family with me and I will do everything to make him happy. I'm looking for a soulmate! OK... it's time to finish my email. I'm sending a kiss by the wind to you and if I sent it to the right destination you should receive it by evening )))) I hope you will catch my kiss somehow )))
By for now!!!
Oh, yes I forgot to add few things...
My mind is always in a mess when I write you because it's hard to write everything to somebody who is so far away. I don't remember if I wrote last time I've never been married, don't have kids but I love them and they love me! I wrote you I teach children how to dance and I know how to understand their wishes and worries. I don't smoke, drink occasionally. And I want to tell you that I always wanted to find an older man. Why? I have two answers.. First, I think older men are much more serious and they can take care of me, they are more experienced in life and can teach me many things. "The older the violin, the sweeter the music" I believe in it... I think I'm not that young already but I don't have much experience in life and I want to have someone who has more experience in life then me. Second... maybe I'm not right about it... but I want to be honest I've always had such worry... if I marry a man nearly my age... and after some years I will become not that young and beautiful... I think it's more hard for a woman to be attractive then for a man... and he will find a younger mistress and I will become very miserable. I don't want my man to be unfaithful. I know I can be faithful to my man and I will never cheat on him. But this is just my worries. This is not my goal. Please tell me if you think you will love your woman at any age and not find a younger one? Can you be faithful? I think it's better to forget about one's age, age is just a number. I became attracted to you and I really want to meet you. If you will not like me or something else we can be just friends. I hope I will get my work visa soon in Moscow and all documents and come to you! I don't have any area limits with this visa so I can work where I want. And one more thing.. i'm sending few pics of my city from different seasons so you can see where I live. You can see pics of the building where I live, the building where I work. I'm just trying to be honest with you and write you all my thoughts on different issues. Please be always honest with me also.... I think I will write you tomorrow, I will see if I have more nice photos to send you.
Kisses to you and have a good day!!!!
Hello, like always I am glad to get a reply from you and I think I am a lucky one because I met such a wonderful man like you in the Internet! And I also hope I will be lucky to meet you in real life soon!!!!!! You know yesterday I told my parents about you. Now I guess they don't worry about my trip so much, at least I hope so. I was tyring to calm them down because I don't want them to be nervous about me and though I am almost 28 yearsl old, I am still a little girl for my parents and I will always be. Now they know that you are a kind man and help me if I need your help. You can show me your city and surroundings and tell me about the culture of your country and about the life over there. I don't remember if I told you that I love cooking. I will cook some tasty Russian food for you and you'll tell me what you think. Most famous food in Russia are Pelmeni, vareniki, blini, borsch, okroshka! I bet you will like it!!! I also like Italian and sea food. I love lasagna and pizza!!!!!!! Yummy! I am the best in cooking lasagna, this is what my friends and family say. I also love Mexican food because it is spicy, though I don't cook Mexican food too often. I like cooking cakes and try something new! My favourite is cheese cake with raspberry!!! Hm, you know when I talk about food I am getting hungry:). I eat everything and I am not on any kind of diets, I just don't eat after 7pm. It also helps me to be in a good shape. I can cook many tasty things for you when we meet! Ok, enough about food! You know ...almost all Russian men are like bears, they are very rude and dishonest. They can't be nice and polite. They can't be jentlemen! They don't want to work and they don't want to have families since it is a big responsibility to have a family. Judging by your letters you are absolutely not like them and I happy to know that!!! I like to go to the cinema! I really like to watch a good movie with my friends. 50 of movies in our cinemas are Russian and about 50 American. Yesterday I was watching "Pirates of Carribean" (part 3) I really like such kind of movies!!! If you didn't see this movie yet, I would advice you to watch it!!! Could you recommend me any American movie so I can watch it? What is your favorite movie and actor? Some time age I watched 'Perfume' (by a novel of Patrick Zuskind). I've read this novel and I like it so much! Breathtaking! Anyway I think the book is better then the movie. Soooooooooooooooo......... what else could I say? I have a driver's licence but I don't have a car. My father has a Russian car and he gives me his car sometimes. I like not only the cinema! I like theatre and opera too, I like ballet. Unfortunately there is only one small theatre in my city and there is nothing interesting. If I want to go to ballet, for example, I should go to Irkutsk, there sometimes can come famous Russian actors and dancers but I can't go there often because it's quite expensive. And now I have some good news for you! After sending this email I will go home, take my bags and go to Irkutsk! From there I will fly to Moscow! I was on a plane only two times in my life and I'm afraid to fly! I hope my plane will not fall down! I'm really afraid! So it is several hours from Irkutsk to Moscow and I will come to Moscow late night. I don't think I will live in hotel there, it's very expensive. You know, due to statistics Moscow is the second most expensive city in the world after Tokyo. I will rent a room in apartment, it will be cheaper then renting a room in a hotel. Of course it will be very modest but it's OK for me! When I come to Moscow and settle down I will write you an email. I will write you as soon as I can!!! In Moscow I will spend a week or maybe even more, I should make all final arrangements with my documents and after that I will come to you! I've never been to Moscow before and I'm so nervous now... I've never went somewhere alone and now I should go alone to such big city! You know... I had such great desire to start my trip already.. and now I feel myself like a newborn kitten who has even didn't open his eyes... I just want to hug my mommy and don't want to go anywhere... but I know that's my dream to start a new life and I will try to turn in to reality! Soon you will hear some news from me from Moscow!!!!!!!!
Many kisses to you!
I hope I'm the one for you!
From nervous and excited Iraida
I'm so excited to write you again!!!!!!!!!! I'm in Moscow! You can't imagine how happy I am that I already started my trip to you! I still cannot believe I've done it! WOW! As I wrote you I was scared to fly on the plane but everything was OK and I'm still alive )))) Moscow is really a big city! I've been told the population of Moscow is about 10 million of people! From the Airport I went by bus... it was so long way... about 1 hour and 30 minutes. I've seen so many nice places in Moscow while going by bus! When I got off the plane in the Moscow Airport policeman asked me about passport and he looked at me like I am an enemy ))) I think all people here (and everywhere) are a little crazy because of terrorism. Everything here is very expensive, not like in my city... and everywhere are big crowds of people! Everywhere is so many people! I'm still uncomfortable about it but I feel soon it will be OK. I've been to few shops here today and I see goods are much more expensive here then in my native city. I found a place to stay, I rent a room from an old woman. She is about 70 years old. She said her husband died 2 years ago and she has two grown up children but they are already married and don't come to visit her very often so she is alone and she has not much money so she give in rent rooms in her apartment. She is very nice woman )) She said I have to be very careful. You know... she said many girls from small cities come to big cities... or even abroad... they are looking for a better future and fortune but because they are from small cities they didn't imagine their way to find the happiness can be not as easy as they thought... and some of them can end up as prostitutes or something like that. She said I should be careful when I meet you!! But I don't worry about you! I feel with all my heart you are really nice man! And I think I'm enough educated not to end up as a prostitute and I will find my happiness! Sorry I wrote you about my worries.. I have nobody to write about it. My parents and my sister are worried enough about me and I don't want to make them worry more. I think that's really good I've met you! I can write you about everything. I miss my parents... but I'm getting better with every hour )) Now I'm very hungry and I will go and eat something. Please confirm the name of airport and be sure you wrote it correctly. Please confirm me your full name and telephone number. Please don't be mad! I just want to be sure I have your contacts! This way I will feel more confident. I am afraid to make any mistake... I hope everything will be fine. I've been told I may have all further information about my trip tomorrow or the day after tomorrow. As soon as I learn it I will write you an email!!! I don't have enough time now to write more things.
With great excitement and many kisses from Moscow,
Hello my dearest!!!!!!!!
Today is one of the days I will remember till the rest of my life. Bunch of positive and negative emotions!!! Just like zebra, black and white stripes!!! Let me start from the beginning. Today I woke up and went to the internet cafe to check mail from you. I was nervous and excited and I was even afraid to check my mail.On the other hand I was imaging that I came to you and you met me at the airport.... Thinking about that I was crossing the street ( the traffic light was green ) and the traffic was heavy, but suddenly a car is with high speed is crossing the street with high speed and suddenly knocks down a woman who was crossing the street together with me and other people. I felt so scared and terrible!!! I even didn't cry and shouted!!! Me and other people were trying to help that woman, she was very bad... Somebody went to call for the urgent medicine car... While we were there the police car came. The woman was taken to the hospital. Me and a few other people were taken to the Police office to give evidence of this accident in details. All in all I spent all day at the Police office. The best news for me was that man with his car was found by evening and the woman will live.
I was angry, upset, I felt hungry... My clothes was dirty because it is very miry outside.
I had to go "home" and take shower and eat and change my clothes.
Then I went to the internet cafe again. And here it is!!!! Your letter made my day, my dear!!!!
I will go to the travel agency tomorrow and they will give me a schedule of my flight (date and time of my arrival, terminal etc.).
So I will write you tomorrow all details.
They asked me to make a copy of my passport (usual procedure) and I decided to send you a copy also, if you l need it. I will send it tomorrow.
Ok, honey, as soon as I receive the information about my trip I will write you.
Your happy Iraida with great kisses from Moscow!!!!
TRAVEL INF0 "Argo Travel" client: Miss Iraida Anphalowa
This reservation will be automatically cancelled if the ticket is not purchased until 10 August 2007, Friday.
Travel dates for: Miss Iraida Anphalowa. Reservation code: 6TKDW
Please label the inside and outside of each piece of baggage to be checked in with your name and where possible your address.
Suitable baggage labels and stickers are available free of charge. In advance of your journey, please note the current free baggage allowance included in your ticket price.
You can find this information in the internet or via your Airline contact person.
In case you booked a special fare please note that it can be subject to restrictions.
Should you have further questions please call your Airline contact.
Travel Abroad: When preparing to travel abroad for less than 5 months, it is important to ensure entry to another country and reentry to the U.S. Depending on the country to be visited and the student's nationality, it may be necessary to apply for a visitor visa.
In order to return to the US, a student must have: a valid passport or travel document, valid visa and an DS-2019.
Furthermore, page 4 of the DS-2019 must be signed by the RO.
Travel to Canada, Mexico or adjacent islands other than Cuba for less than 30 days, does not require a valid J-1 visa in some cases.
Travel Within the U.S.: No special permission is needed, but it is important to have a valid passport, DS-2019 and I-94.
Thank you for your booking and have a pleasant journey.
Kind regards,"Argo Travel" 129465 , Moscow, Lomonosova 43 office 31.
Please use our service .Managers Mr.Roman Koshkin, Ms.Julia Malisheva
Departing flight 11 August 2007, Saturday
Departure: 07:05 Moscow, Russia - Sheremetyevo Intl, terminal 2
Arrival: 08:20 Frankfurt, Germany - Frankfurt International, terminal 1
Airline: Lufthansa LH3189 e
Aircraft: Airbus Industrie A300-600/600C
Departure: 09:55 Frankfurt, Germany - Frankfurt International, terminal 1
Arrival: 11:50 Chicago, USA - O'Hare International, terminal 5
Airline: United Airlines UA8836 e
Aircraft: Boeing 747-400
Return flight 10 November 2007, Saturday
Departure: 15:50 Chicago, USA - O'Hare International, terminal 1
Arrival: 06:55 +1 day(s) Frankfurt, Germany - Frankfurt International, terminal 1
Airline: United Airlines UA8837 e
Aircraft: Airbus Industrie A330-300
Departure: 08:30 Frankfurt, Germany - Frankfurt International, terminal 1
Arrival: 13:30 Moscow, Russia - Sheremetyevo Intl, terminal 2
Airline: Lufthansa LH3182 e
Aircraft: Airbus Industrie A320-100/200
Price: USD 1290.00 + Round trip tickets.Eco.class.
Sunil hello,this is the info I have got from agency and I think I have the problem. and it seems to me I need your help because I must get this flight and nearest possible flight for me only in August and I hate to imagine if something goes wrong, I have done too much to lose all now. I know it sounds like I am pooroutsider but you see I have not time or somebody to ask about help and I have nobody to help me, you know my relatives gave me all that we could collect for my travel. I hate to ask but now I don't have any other choice. I booked the tickets but I can pass my interview only when I pay for my tickets, I didn't know about it. I can receive my visa only after I pay my tickets so they want to be sure I have a roundtrip tickets so I am not going to stay there illegally. I think their rules are too strict...
The problem is that everything is getting more exspensive. Oh, I forgot to tell you that the date of my return flight can be changed.
I promise that I will return all the money I borrow as soon as I can. I will get salary and collect the sum you lend me, it is only money ,and I think that it is not too hard for you to help me. You see I have such chance only once in my life. I know you are kind man and I do hope you will be able to help me.
I was in the bank to try to ask them about credit but they tell I have to have something to leave them and I have nothing to leave because I have only some clothes, some parfume and it is all I have, and small gift for you from russia with love People in the bank gave me an advise that if I have good friend (I told them about my problems and you ) that you may send me money very fast, they tell that there is the system western union and it works very fast, I am not sure I know how it works but they tell you need only my name and address here in moscow and I have to have only passport to get it in any bank of Moscow and only I can get the money when you send it,I think it is good way and like I was explained it is very safe and takes a few minutes only.
I have about 300$ yet and I need about 1000$ from your side. I am talking about American dollars. After getting money I will make all payment and I will have an interview, it is a must.
I also have good news!!! They say I can stay longer than three months I can stay about six months for first time.
I will have to change the date of my returning flight only. I also want to say that you don't have to worry if you don't like me or something in my charachter
I will not disturb you. It is only your wish to share your time with me, and money is money, I will return it all to you anyway.
I am sorry for such a cold letter but I am getting crazy to think that you can just don't reply and I will stay here without any result of all my hopes and dreams , and hard work too.
Oh, silly me! I almost forgot to give you my full name and my address here in Moscow ( where I rent a room).
Country : Russia
Address: Zelinskogo 24 - 51
postal code (zip) : 117334
Full name: Iraida Anphalova (this is the right writing in English)
You should put this info on their list and send me info when you send me the money.
I will need to know MTCN (money transfer control number) which will be given to you when you send me the money and your full name.
Well I will finish this letter since I am a little tired and feel not well.
I know that it is hard decision for you because you don't know me well enough, but dear please help me and you will not sorry of it I promise!!!
Please don't leave me alone in hard minute I will pay the same when we meet!!!
And I will have paper with my and your names when I will be in your airport I don't want to miss you!!!!!
Kiss many times!!!!
With great hope,
Hello my dear Sunil!!!
I felt so lost and bad. But you even cannot imagine how much happy I am now when I know that you are tyring to help me and believe me I am thankful to you from the bottom of my heart!!! When I thought about going to the USA to earn some money, I was going to do that to make life better, to see other country and improve my English. I just wanted to change my life better. Is this a crime? No. Besides, I was going to work but not to be with some "sugar daddy". I thought that it would be great if I am not alone there in the USA because you know it is kinda dangerous to go to other coutry alone. So, I decided to find a friend or someone who can at least talk to me. It was you and I know that I wasn't mistaken when I wrote you. I liked you and somehow you managed to get deep into my heart. You know that I am also single and want to find that special one. I am tired to be alone. As it turned out It is a big problem to find a good man. Do you understand what I mean? I don't expect him to be some SUPERMAN ( perfect body, fat wallet, smart and funny....etc.). I just want him to be a GOOD MAN, who can share with me all happy and sad moments of life, to be a friend, a lover, a moral support, to be a good listener and adviser in different situation. To be my half... These are simple things, don't you think so? I don't know if we meet or not because still my tickets are not paid yet, but I do hope that you will help me and we shall meet. Somehow you got deep into my heart and I know that it is too soon to talk about us, but we never know what can happen, right? I like you and you like me. We can try. Right now only you can make this happen because I really don't have money enough to pay for the tickets. Like I told you I will work hard as much as possible and give you the money back. I know that probably it is a lot of money for you. I understand that though it doesn't make me feel comfortable to ask you for a loan. I don't know what I can do in this situation. I do want to come to the USA and earn money, I do want to come to you. I don't ask you just to give me this money. I ask you about a loan. If only I could, I would never ask you for help. And only you can help me in this situation. Oh, God! I feel so horrible and I am about to cry. I know that you are a kind man and I beg you to help me. I swear I return you the money once I earn it there in the USA. I don't want any misunderstanding or mistrust between us, so please tell me all your fears and everything which is in your mind. Just give me a chance, give us a chance! Help me to change my life and I will be thankful to you till the rest of my life. This is my scream for help!
I know that you are a great man and I believe you will help me!
I need to calm down, so I will go to Church and pray for you and ask God for help!
I beg you, don't leave me!!!! Please!!!!
PS Please write me as soon as possible!
Hello my dear!!!! I have so many thoughts running through my head and I don't know where to start from. I was planning this trip and I was saving money carefully for more then a year. I didn't know where exactly I was going ( I mean I didn't know what state I was going to fly) and that is why I didn't know the cost of the trip. With all these plane changes...You know yesterday I even saled my mom's golden jewelry for four hundred dollars and I need already 650 American dollars only. I thought that if you give me a loan, this will help. I have nothing to sale anymore. I have never been abroad and this was the first time I was arranging the trip. I am not after best standards of living and I am not after sugar daddies, I am trying to be me. I am trying to develop myself in all areas and not to stay in the small town deep in Russia where there is no job, no money just for a living. nothing! I didn't know that my trip will cost more money. I was planning my trip more then a year ago and I planned it due to the price of the previous year. Then I met you... If you don't help me noone will help me. I don't want to survive, I want to live. It is not funny when you have a salary two thousand roubles per month. Ok, enough about that. If cannot help me, then I must cancel the trip and go back home because I have no any other way out. I wish I could come to you... I really liked you a lot and I guess there is something more, it is a sympathy for a man from a woman. I wish I knew that everything will be so complicated. And I feel bad that I can loose all my saved money for the trip, I mean papers arrangements, trip from Bratsk to Moscow, living here. I have never seen you in person and now I guess I will never see you if you don't help me. Sometimes destiny plays bad and hurtful games with us, but this is life. You are something special for me and I even don't know how to explain and maybe I shouldn't say that. Please let me know if I have chances to get your financial help or not. I need to know this as soon as possible. If nothing works out with my trip, then I will be here in Moscow for a few more days because I need to try and return some money from the agency and then I will go back to my home town. Don't let me down!!! I need to calm down, so I think I will finish this letter because I am about to cry