Letter(s) from Ekaterina Ivanova to Allen (USA)

Letter 1

Hi Al!!!You should excuse me in my mistake . I read letters which we wrote each other and have by mistake sent not that letter. Here which I wrote my letter to you.

Darling Al !!!If you were here right now with me I would wrap these big arms around you, have you lay your head on my shoulder, and whisper in your ear that we don't have to be lonely any longer. You are right, lonliness is an awful thing. It can eat away at your heart until you become a different person. Every time I see a message in my email from you my heart skips a beat. I told you once before that we would make a very dangerous couple...I still do. I hate the word "relationship". There is nothing permanent about it. But I guess that is what we have, at least an email relationship. If we get upset or mad with one another, we just go away, don't even have to say a word to one another. I would rather think in longer terms, not a relationship, but a permanent lasting marriage. But we are burdened by a great distance and can't do those normal things that a couple can do together. And if we were to meet and spend some time together, would it be enough time to make a decision for the rest of our lives? I told you we picked a hard way and now we are beginning to find out that it is true. Did God put us together? Destiny? Blind luck? It is not blind luck, that much I know. If it was God or destiny, there is nothing that either you or I can do to prevent it. We have been put here on this earth for one another. So why are we apart? And when we answer that question, the next one has to be, what are we going to do about it? Yes, I tremble when I think of holding you. It would be you holding me up rather than the other way. Our first kiss would be like an electric shock running through our bodies. I told you that we had to start a fire. The fire is burning brightly. No need to add more fuel. There are really two fires, the one in my body but more importantly is the one in my heart. The fire in the body can temporarily be pushed aside, but the one in the heart does not go away. I wish to be near with you for ever. You lit fire in my heart. I am very much excited!!! I trust you.. I cannot express my feelings in words too. I want to come to you in thae spring, because the spring is a season of a meeting and love. I should travel to Moscow to receive the international passport and the visa that I could arrive to you. I can receive my papers (visa and passport) during two weeks.But I cannot come to Moscow and to do the passport and the visa without your help because I haven't enough of money resources. Can you help me? I would be the happiest girl on a planet if I shall be near with you. I want that you were honest with me in the feelings because I do not want to damage the heart and the feelings. I felt myself so lonely in this cold world. But I kept you in my heart and it warmed up me. I am so happy. You make me happy. I am wait your letter with great impatience.