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Letter(s) from Polina Dubrovina to John (USA)
My Tiger hello! It's good to write you again! I think I'm a lucky girl to meet such good man as you in Internet! I hope I will be lucky enough to meet you in the real life!!! Yesterday I told my parents about you. They said that now they don`tworry about me as before because now they know you are a kind man and can help me if I will need your help. You can show me your city and tell me about the life over there! I think I didn't write you I like cooking. I will cook Russian cuisine for you! Pelmeni, vareniki, blini, borsch, okroshka! You will like it! Besides Russian cuisine I like Italian and Mexican. I love spaghetti and pizzza!!!!! mmmmmmm ! I can't live without it! I like Mexican food because it's very spicy, although I don't cook Mexican dishes too often. I've been told my cooking is very tasty! I like to cook cakes. My favorite is cheese-cake with raspberry! You know... when I talk about food I'm getting hungry ))) I eat everything and I'm not on any diets but usually I don't eat after 7 pm. This helps me not to be fat! I can cook many tasty things for you when we will meet! You know.. almost all Russian men are like bears! They are so rude, they can't be nice and polite, they don't want to have a family. I think you are not like them. I like to go to the cinema! I really like to watch a good movie with my friends. 50 percents of movies in our cinemas are Russian and about 50 American. Actually my favorite actor is Johnny Depp and I like all movies with him. I've watched Pirates of the Carribean (part 3 and 4) some time ago! I think the third part is not as good as the first part. Have you seen it? Could you recommend me any American movie so I can watch it? What is your favorite movie and actor? Soooooooooooooooo......... what else could I say? I have a driver's licence but I don't have a car. My father has a Russian car and he gives me his car sometimes. I don`t like only cinema! I like theatre and opera too, I like ballet. Unfortunately there is only one small theatre in my city and there is nothing interesting. If I want to go to ballet, for example, I should go to Kursk, there sometimes can come famous Russian actors and dancers but I can't go there often because it's quite expensive. By, the way, one thing else about my trip. Agency will help me to rent a room to stay near my future work. I will share this room with a few girls yet, it is usual procedure and it helps to pay the rent (it will be cheaper). And I have a question, is it normal if we will like each other may be it is possible to live together?of course if you or somebody doesn't mind. As you know I will stay there for three months but If I will like there I will be able to prolong my trip. I think I will be able to improve my english and you can learn Russian and I think it will help us to learn each other better,who knows.Do you have a big wide bed?(joke). And now I have some good news for you! After sending this email I will go home, take my packed bags and go to Kursk! From there I will fly to Moscow! I`m really afraid to fly on a plane! I hope my plane will not fall down! I'm really afraid! It is several hours from Kursk to Moscow. When I come to Moscow and settle down I will write you an email. I hope today I will be able to write you. Please don't worry about me if you don't hear from me today, that will mean I was not able to find a place to stay and I will write you tomorrow. In Moscow I will spend a week or maybe even more, I should make all final arrangements with my documents and after it I will come to you! I've never been to Moscow before and I'm so nervous now... I've never went somewhere alone and now I should go alone to such big city! I really want to talk to you by phone, but as I don`t have a mobile phone, I will find a public phone in Moscow with international calls. You know... I had such great desire to start my trip already.. and now I feel myself like a newborn kitten who has even didn't open it's eyes... I just want to hug my mommy and don't want to go anywhere... but I know that's my dream to start a new life and I will try to turn in to reality! Soon you will hear some news from me from Moscow!!!!!!!!
Love and kisses! hope I'm the one for you!
I send you photos (autumn - my favorite season)
I can’t keep silence anymore…Just I can’t! You are my love.
I hope I have a right to call you “my love”? I have never thought
I’ll tell man something like that.In few days I won’t be able to live without you.
We are corresponding not a first day. And I tried not to open you my heart completely.
I was afraid that you’ll understand how much do you mean for me!
In general, I was afraid that you will be frightened and leave me.
I don’t know, why these ideas come to my mind.
But if I decided to write you about it, it means that I study to overcome my fears!
Actually I’m writing because I need to splash out my feelings! They are overfilling me!
Otherwise I can loose my mind. I know that no one died from love, but I can become the first.
My head is overcharged with thoughts about you.
You are always and everywhere with me in spite of the kilometers separating us.
I can’t without such thoughts. I don’t suggest them to be a mental disorder.
I think it is one of my achievements.
I want to say that you are teaching me stability and constancy.
I began to respect myself for this.
I will be higher if YOU are near me!!!
************ I LOVE YOU!**************
Let everyone know about it!!! I don’t grudge!!!
In spite of everything: storms, thunders, tsunami, hurricanes, earthquakes, floods,
fires, catastrophes, global heating, ozone holes, outbursts of different viruses,
upheaval of the Earth from its axis, sun-spots, meteorite rains, convulsions of nature,
avalanches, wreckage of brokers' boards,
global cataclysms and many other – my love to you becomes strengthener!!!
I’m not afraid nothing and I am not afraid of any obstacle. Until the hope is in my life!
I’d say rather more: YOU are my hope and my life!
If you leave me, you’ll take me with you.
And you will take my life too. It has no sense.
That’s why I want to LIVE. This means “to be with you, my love!!!”
I almost forgot to tell you good news: my mother sent me 140 dollars.
Now ***** I need 850 ******. I do my best to our meeting occurs as soon as possible!!!
********** Can I still hope? **********
Hello again..I just want to add few things... I think last time I wrote you not all my thoughts... My mind is always in a mess when I write you because it's hard to write everything to somebody who is so far away. I don't remember if I wrote last time I've never been married, don't have kids but I love them and they love me! I And I want to tell you that I always wanted to find an older man. Why? I have two answers.. Firstly, I think older men are much more serious and they can take care of me, they are more experienced in life and can teach me many things. Have you heard a saying "The older the violin, the sweeter the music"? I believe in it... I think I'm not that young already but I don't have much experience in life and I want to have someone who has more experience in life then me. Secondly... maybe I'm not right about it... but I want to be honest I've always had such worry... if I marry a man nearly my age... and after some years I will become not that young and beautiful... I think it's more hard for a woman to be attractive then for a man... and he will find a younger mistress and I will become very miserable. I don't want my man to be unfaithful. I know I can be faithful to my man and I will never cheat on him. But this is just my worries. This is not my goal. Please tell me if you think you will love your woman at any age and not find a younger one? Can you be faithful? Also I want to tell you that I learned english in university, so I don`t use any translators, and I can speak english as good as I write on it. I hope we will have no problems in communications. I feel that you are very nice man I really want to meet you. If you will not like me or something else we can be just friends. I hope I will get my work visa soon in Moscow and all documents and I come to you! I don't have any area limits with this visa so I can work where I want. I don`t know exact day of my arrival, but as soon as I will know I will write it to you. You know, I'm just trying to be honest with you and write you all my thoughts on different issues. Please be always honest with me also.... I will write you later, I will look if I have more nice photos to sendyou. Have a good day!
You like a photos? You love carrots? :-)
Hello!!! How are you? Today I had a wonderful dream, that we finally meet, I feel myself like the happiest girl in the world!!!
In Moscow its "rather hot weather", about -1`C, but I feel myself so alone. :-)
Everyone rush somewhere and I don`t know anybody here.
Today I was in a travel agency, all my documents are ready.
Now they are checking a possible flight to your airport.
They will give me all information (date and time of my arrival, terminal etc.) tomorrow I think. Now I will continue to see Moscow, like a tourist. In Moscow there are so many different museums!
I will go to The State Tretyakov Gallery (The National Museum of Russian Fine Art).
It is not far from the Kremlin, there should be a lot of tourists from all over the world. I read about this gallery before, its collection contains near 130 000 works of painting, sculpture and graphics.
There there are pictures in cost 250 million dollars!!!!!
It should be really amazing!!! Ok, I send you a thousand kisses and will wait for your message!!!!
Tomorrow in the morning I shall go to embassy.
And I will have information on my flight!
Hello, its me again!! I just wanted to tell you hi!!
I decided to send you more photos, I hope you will like it.
I think you are interested that I don`t have a boyfriend, because all men here look on my appearance and I want somebody who will look inside me.
.........two picture....sexy.... :-)
I'm not info taking naked photos!
I really apologize if you think now I'm not a good girl...
I hope you don't think so. Please let me know and I will write you more if I'm forgiven for sending this pic!!!
I hope you will answer this email and we will try to get to know each other better!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAh!!!! I'm so ashamed to send this pic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I also want to see your different photos and hope to know you better!
>>> WHAT IS YOUR REAL AGE?
>>> I like adult men! :-) The adult the man always serious and sincere!
I'm looking for a friend, lover or maybe even something serious...
I'm a free bird now, I don't have a boyfriend and I'm open to anything!!!I would like to have a serious relationship although I don't know if that's possible in internet so I'm looking just for a good man who can show me over there and....... we will see!!!!!!!!
I'm impatiently waiting for your answer!
Hello, my >>Tiger< I’m very glad that you replied me so fast.
I thought that telling about money, I have lost you.
In Russia it’s often occurs with men.
I suggest it is for hard economic situation in our country.
Men don’t need women with their love.
I don’t want to believe that the quantity of real men diminishes.
I want to read your sensible and romantic letters.
I know that it is difficult for men. I don’t have possibility to call you. Unfortunately,
I don’t have a telephone in Moscow.
It’s very expensive to call to your country from Moscow.
And the calls by the cost of subscriber are not practiced in our country.
But I will find a resolution. I promise. Write me obligatory! Don’t be lost.
We will put everything onto the phone conversation.
It’s first of all the warranty for you that I am real.
Isn’t it? We will be able to express more emotions and feelings in letters.
It’s difficult to imagine how our parents could live without telephone.
They found common language using letters. And they managed to do it.
I read books about it. Love and faith are the feelings that born and die inside ourselves.
The birth of these feelings depends on our needs.
As for me, I can say that the need to love and to be loved is on the first place for me.
My request for help from one hand is the opportunity to come to you,
and from other hand is the approval of seriousness of your plans.
I’m sorry that my confidence in our victory against the problems differs a bit from yours.
Because you are a man and I am a woman.
If everything were on contrary, the world would go upside down.
I will back all money to the last cent without doubt, and if everything will be ok, I will stand for you forever.
That’s why I ask you a question: are you serious in your intensions? If yes, write me soon.
I hope very much that I provoked sympathy in you.
I do not have ticket. What for to me to buy a single ticket?
Such ticket does not need to be bought...
In embassy ask the ticket on a way back.....
Dear, I do not wish to give you a words of good bye!
I am sorry about all the problems with the money!
But without your help I will not be able to fly to you.
My relatives will no longer be able to help me out.
Mama gave me almost all the money that she had to
help me out with this journey.
If you can not help me, I will be returning to home.
But I do not want to be lonely again.
I do not want to return home.
I do not want to stay in Moscow either.
I do not want anyone but you.
More than anything else, I would like to continue the trip!
I want you! I want you to surround me with your tenderness, warmth and care.
I certainly think about the future. I want us to be together.
I go to sleep and I wake up together with the thoughts about you.
They are not leaving my head.
More to that, I’d like to wake up in your arms every day.
I’d like to be sure that you really need me now and in the future.
I just want to look into your eyes.
I want to feel your warm breath.
I want to see your smile and know that this smile is for me.
I want to be waken up by you rather than some kind of alarm clock.
I want to be your sunshine.
I want you to warm your hands up in the back pockets of my jeans.
I want you to pay me with your kisses for the rental of my jeans pockets.
I want to belong to you and. I am yours and you’re mine.
I want to believe you and never question anything you say.
I want to hear your voice. I want to get to your inner thoughts.
I want to be everything you need. I want you to know all these things.
I want you to love me.
Can’t wait for the moment I board the plane and start my final journey to you.
I am sick without you. Thank you for your letter and kind words!
I am looking forward to hearing some good news from you.
Hope you can help me out and give me your support.
Thank's for your reply so much!!!
I hope soon I will be able to come to your area and we will meet each other!
This time I will write you more about myself. I think you should know more about my life and my hobbies so you will know if we have any common interests. I'm 24 years old, not too young I think? My birthday is 27 February. I'm 165,5 cm tall (5.2) and 50,5 kg weight..
I don't know exactly my bust-waist-hips measurements, I don't have a reason to measure it because I think it's OK and my body is proportionate ))
I take care of my body, I do aerobics three times a week and I go to the swimming pool twice a week.
I have no sister or brother. I live with the father and mother.
We all live in two-rooms flat.
As I wrote you I live in Russia. The name of my city is Rylsk, it's near Kursk city. Rylsk is very small and Kursk is a large city, the main city in our district.
I graduated from Kursk Humanitarian University two years ago.
As I wrote you I`m a menager of the big shop, my city is small but we have a big shop here. Sometimes I attend courses in Kursk so I have several diplomas (look pic), but you know in russia we don`t have good work opportunities. But this work help me to take care about myself. When I come to your city I think it won`t be a problem to find work on my specialization (I shall work as the simple seller).
My father is 58 years old now, my mom is 46. You see my mom is much younger then my father and they are very happy together. My mother is a teacher of music in the school. I also could play a piano a little. I like classic music, jazz, rock, lounge. I like all kinds of music!
A little about my father: he is in a good shape because we usually make exercises together, he doesn`t work now, because he is retired already.
I love both my parents and I'm happy my parents will be not alone when I leave them and will go to another country. Of course I will miss everybody but I want to have my own happiness!
Do you have an International Airport in your city? Please write me it's name an code.
Or write me the name of the nearest International Airport to you.
I write you my emails from Internet cafe, I don't have my own computer.
If you want I can call you when I will be in Moscow, it would be nice to talk to you. We don't have international calls here. I suppose in few days I will fly to Moscow and start my trip! Today I will tell my parents about you, I'm sure they will be happy that someone is waiting for me over there!
There is no any messenger in this Cafe so we can only keep emailing each other. I hope you are not getting bored to read my emails?
My address here is Russia, Rylsk, Kurchatogo per. street 2, flat 8, post code(zip) - 307370.
So now you have a representation of who I am....
I just can tell you that I enjoy life and I try to live to the fullest, I like to try new things. I'm not that smart.. I was not that good in mathematics, physics, biology and so on! I don't like to be smart! But I'm very tender, caring, artistic, faithful, decent person.
Sometimes I can be not well organized, I think everybody had it's own minuses and pluses. I don't look any special qualities in a man. I just hope he will be
faithful to me and ready to create a happy family with me and I will do everything to make him happy. I'm looking for a soulmate!
OK... it's time to finish my email. I'm sending a kiss by the wind to you and if I sent it to the right destination you should receive it by evening )))) I hope you will catch my kiss somehow )))
Hello!!! I'm so excited to write you again!!!!!!!!!! I'm in Moscow! You can't imagine how happy I am because I already started my trip to you!
I still cannot believe I've done it! WoW! As I wrote you I was scared to fly on the plane but everything was OK and I'm still alive ))))
Moscow is a really big city! I've been told the population of Moscow is about 10 million of people! From the Airport I went by bus... it was so long way... about 1 hour and 30 minutes. I've seen so many nice places in Moscow while going by bus!
When I got off the plane in the Moscow Airport policeman asked me about passport and he looked at me like I am an enemy )))
I think all people here are a little crazy because of terrorism.
Everything here is very expensive, not like in my city... and everywhere are big crowds of people! Everywhere is so many people! I feel uncomfortable because of it but I hope I will be OK soon.
I found a place to stay, I rent a room from an old policeman. He is about 70 years old. He said his wife died 2 years ago and he doesn`t have money to live, so he give in rent rooms in her apartment.
He is very nice man. He said I have to be very careful.
You know... he said many girls from small cities come to big cities, they are looking for a better future and fortune but because they are from small cities they can`t imagine that their way to find the happiness can be not so easy as they thought... and some of them can end up as prostitutes or something like that. He said I should be careful when I will meet you!! But I don't worry about you! I feel with all my heart you are really nice man!
Sorry I wrote you about my worries.. I have nobody to write about it.
My parents are worried enough about me and I don't want to make them to worry more. I think that's really good I've met you! I can write you about everything. I miss my parents... but I'm getting better with every hour ))
Now I'm very hungry and I will go and eat something.
I`m sending for you some photos of Moscow that I found in internet.
Please confirm the name of international airport (and his code) and be sure you wrote it right.
I am afraid to make any mistake... I hope everything will be fine.
please write me as soon as possible!See you soon! Great kiss from Moscow!!