Letter(s) from Natalia Salikova to Marckk (Spain)

Letter 1

Hi, honey Marcial! Thank you for your new letter. Thank you for making our future possible. Thank you for this wonderful love story that has started and will not have an end. I sincerely hope it will be this way. It is quite natural that you don't want to deal with liars and scammers. I don't want to deal with bad men who can use me as a cheap sexual slave or porno victim. We both want only the better for ourselves and it is natural we will be careful. I just want you to realize that we are equal. You have your fears, I have my fears. You are scared I can use you, I'm scared you can use me. What should we do to get sure that we both are honorable and have only good intentions???We need to communicate and stay totally honest. I almost don't know you and how generous you are. What if you are a bad man who can use me??? What if I will be a victim????? I'm a woman and I'm more weak by the nature. So I can have even more fears than you have. Just don't be skeptical because I don't deserve this. I don't care how many bad experiences you had in the past and I don't care how many bad women you met. I just know that our story is unique. I'm not guilty that some women turned to be scammers. I'm not guilty that there were some foreign men who pretended to be good husbands but then used their wives as porno victims. I can't be responsible for all bad people. I'm different and we are building our own love story that shouldn't be based on your bad experiences from your past. If we follow your fears I will not have a chance at all. if you think that all the women are potential scammers than any woman will not be able to prove you that she is good. Please be smatter and realize that good women still exist an they deserve to have a chance. I'm genuine in my search and I don't want to stay alone only because all the men are disappointed and see a bad woman in me. I have not hurt anyone and I don't want to suffer only because there were some women who used men. Please be sure that I know many stories when Ukrainian women suffered as from Ukrainian men as from foreign men. It is not right to reduce all to the same level. People are different and stories are different. Just forget everything you heard. Clean your memory and your heart. This is the only one way how you can give me a chance to prove you that I deserve your trust. We have plenty of time to communicate and to check our feelings. Judge me by my letters and your impressions about me but not by your experiences in the past. It is not my fault someone used someone in the past. I can't be responsible for world harm. I want to be responsible one for my own actions and intentions. So give me a chance and you will not regret. I don't have anything to hide and I don't have any intentions to make you fall in love with someone else. That is why I'm sending you my own pictures. I have never been to abroad and that is why I don't know how women look in other countries. All I know is that women are really beautiful in Ukraine. I'm who I am and I look the way the nature created me. I want you to fall in love with me knowing how I look and what person I am. That is why I stay totally sincere and open in my letters and I send you my photos that were taken in my daily life and on some special occasions such my disco club visits, sea trips and others. So be sure I look the way you can see on my photos and I don't have anything to hide from you. My photos were taken in different situations and at different stages of my life. Some of them are amateur and were taken just on the streets of the city, but some were taken especially. But they are not modelling because I have never been a model. It is a big illusion that all the photos of good quality must be modeling. We live in the modern world and that is why it is so simple to make a good photo that is not modeling in fact. I prefer to pay for our letters to be translated because I don't trust computer translators. Of course being a student I have my money short and it is extremely difficult to pay for my letters. SO I wanted to save my money when i decided to find a man outside my country. I put my profile in Internet and then you answered me. I asked the people at the translation office to translate your letter with a help of a computer program. As a result I got a piece of paper with Russian words but without any sense. I didn't understand anything because computer program just translated all the worlds and didn't pay any attention on grammar and sentences. So I got scared to use some computer programs. We will not understand each other if we use computer programs. I prefer to use alive interpreters because it is the only one way how we can be sure that we understand each other. of course it is a pity I have to spend money for this. But money is nothing for me comparing with my future happiness. So I prefer to refuse myself in buying food and clothes just to be able to build my future with you. Of course I'm not perfect because no one is perfect. But it is quite possible I can be your perfect soul mate. Once I was told to do only what my heart would tell me to do. So I think it is too foolish not to give us a chance. It will not kill you if you give us a chance. But if you don't give us a chance you may regret about that till the rest of your life. What if you will never meet anyone who was as close to you as I have become. Then you will really regret. It is always regret about what you have done than to regret about what you have not done. So please give us a chance and I promise I will not disappoint you. Also I think that it is not right to tell me that you still doubt wether I'm honest and tell you about me the way I am. How can I be sure that you are who you say you are. How can I be sure that I can trust you. We are equal here. Never forget about this. You can meet a woman in you country and start relations with her. But in the very beginning of your meeting you will know who she is, she will be the same stranger for you as I am for you now and it will be difficult for you to trust her as well. So it doesn't matter how we met in letters or in real. In both cases women are strangers for you and you need to win their trust the same way as they will win your trust. I hope you don't think that only I should win your trust but take your trust for granted. We both deserve to have each other's trust and that is why we are equal. Last time we discussed my life experience and what made me want you exactly. It is also so important to discuss our intentions, our ideas for our future life together and what we can give each other. Let me share my expectations for the future with you and what I can give you in return for your love. If I could spend a day with you, we'd enjoy each other's company. We'd hold hands as we strolled in the city, and we'd talk about everything. If I could spend an evening with you, I'd cherish each minute that we're together. I'd stare into your excited eyes, and, without a single word, you'd know how much I admire you. If I could spend a night with you, I'd hold you in my arms the whole night through. And I'd make passionate love to you. If I could spend my life with you, I'd try to make you taken care of. I'd always be there for you, wiping away your tears when you're sad or blue, and every day, I'd tell you how much I love you. You know what sad experience I had in the past when my father wanted to give me in marriage to a guy I didn't love and even didn't know. My decision to connect my life with you is my own conscious choice based on your ability to love me, to take good care of me, your decision to respect me and my desires. I really feel so positive and sure about our future. There is the only one issue that scares me a lot. You see, I have already paid 4 pairs of letters that we exchanged. I wish I could have unlimited financial possibilities that I don't have in fact. Tomorrow will be the hardest day in my life because it will be the first day that I will not be sure I will be able to pay for our next pair of letters. I will hope for some miracle to happen or some help to be found. I don't know where I will find it. If you have some ideas, please share them with me. We need to be a team and to solve all the problems together. Everything is perfect between us and I'm sure you are generous to help me to solve our problems with dignity. I know I will be scared tomorrow because of my disability to pay for our letters. But I want to celebrate today, because we're together, and I hope to celebrate tomorrow, because I look forward to the days ahead with a wonderful man like you. Sometimes we go to disco clubs with my friends. Once I found the courage to take some photos in my dance dress. Hope you like the result. Having you deeply in my heart, waiting for many more happy moments with you, Natalie with hope.

Letter 2

Thanks for this happy moment, my dear Marcial! You always make my day with your letters! Thank you. I thank you for the photo. I see the photo was taken when you had vacation on Tenerife. I have never been to abroad but of course I know what places are more popular for vacation for I have heard that Tenerife i a beautiful place. So I guess you liked your vacation there. The girl on the photo looks cute. You are a very attractive man and you have a class. I guess something went wrong with you and that girl and that is why you decided to look for a new woman for your life. I like how you describe me your personality and I see you have so many good qualities that I want to see in my man. So be sure I'm attracted to you not only because you are a good looking man but also because you are a nice person and I'm sure you have all the qualities to our family happy. I like how you describe the way you want to build relations with me. I completely agree with the list of your priorities and what preferences you have in life. I don't think that it is a great idea to let your friends translate our letters. When our letters are translated by qualified translators these people are not involved in our relations and they don't have any personal attitude. I will never let my friends who know English to translate for us because I want to save our privacy and I don't want my friends to know what we are talking about. So I don't like your idea to let your friends know what we are writing to each other. The qualified translators who work for us are objective and they are unprejudiced. But your friends are the persons who can't be objective and that is why they will always support your point of view and will not be objective for me. So let;s use the translation service we use right now. It seems to me that I read the most interesting book in my life and we both are the only two main heroes in this book. Thank you for this lovely feeling that I have when I realize I create my own love story with you. We are main heroes of our romance. But we both have families, close friends that will be parts of our mutual life when we are together. My family consists of my parents, me, and my younger sister. I love my parents. I deeply respect my mother for a wonderful woman she is, for her patient character, for her wisdom and kindness, for her readiness to surround everyone with endless love. My youngest sister is cute. I have mixed feelings when it concerns my father. As far as my loved mother connected her life with my father, she probably saw something good in him. It is my pain that there was nothing good in my father when I grew up. Since I was a teenager I was considered the prettiest and the most clever girl in the village. I was concentrated on my school studying only and didn't want to have any connections with any men. I was like a forbidden fruit for guys. They couldn't invent any way to make me start to date with no one. I just felt they all were wrong for me and just was waiting for the right time and for the right man. My father was angry with me as well because he wanted me to get married to some farm guy just in order not to feed me anymore. I was only 17 and wasn't ready for a marriage with anyone. My father made a deal with one guy and they agreed that my father would get something in exchange for my freedom. Luckily my mother got to know about that, and the other night my mother helped me to leave the village. I went to a bigger city and became independent. I still don't talk to my father and can't forgive him. To be more correct my father wanted to sell me. It is extremely difficult for me to pay for our letters. But even having the most difficult financial situation I have never had, I don't have any bad thoughts, I'm not going to sell anyone, and I will not make any crime. I don't know what I will do to be able to pay for our letters, but surely I will not sell anyone and even will not think about this. All I need is your support and appreciation for my efforts with translation expenses. I got totally disappointed in Ukrainian men. My father, that guy and many other men are numerous examples of lazy, egoistic Ukrainian men who don't want to do anything and accept women's love for granted. As you can see I have solid argumentation to be sure that I can be happy only with a man from abroad. If I meet a Ukrainian guy I always remember how cruelly my father wanted to use me and I suspect all the other Ukrainian men. So I can open my heart for you only just because I know you are from the country where women are respected, honored, and can be loved with clear intentions. It is a pity that I end this letter after a sad story of my life. But I can't rewrite my past. All I can do is to make our present and future happy and full of pleasant moments only. Believe me I will do my best to full fill our life with happy moments only. There is no any place for sadness in our future. Last summer I had vacation on the sea side. I'm sending you two photos from my summer vacation. One photo was taken just on the beach when I had a pleasant walk in the evening. The other photo was taken in the yard of the house where I lived. Waiting to hear from you soon, Sending you my love, Natalie.