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Letter(s) from Kate Smolarek to Deolindo (Canada)
Moika, I'm sorry for all I did these last few days. I am really ashamed of what I have done. The truth is, I love you, Moika. I can never think or make any decision without you. I am nothing without you. You gave me a new life and I would never want you to take this beautiful and charming life away from my side; I won't ever let you do that because I know you love me too.
At times, I do get selfish, I do get rude, but I don't mean to do that. I always want to see you happy. I've done such silly things to see you happy and laughing, so that you could feel me inside your soul.
Ups and downs are a part of life. Your lover is the one with whom you share your thoughts and dreams. You shared each and every part of your life with me as did I, but I am always scared why we quarrel at times; why do we hurt each other's feelings? We promised not to let any tears come into our eyes, then why? You are a part of my soul. A part of my body; I feel you in myself.
At this stage where we are, I don't want you to leave me alone on this dusky, dark street. I love you and always want to be with you. I am sorry for everything I did. I promised that I was going to tell everyone that I love you. So, I am doing it - telling the whole world that I love you, Moika. May you live long and always be happy.
Moika I asure u that if U do it this time I would arive ok Please sweetie just take your time and tell me when U would get some money and we wopuld get together ok. I love u so much
Dear Moika my love,
How are you doing, I love u so much and U mean the world to me Please Moika forgive me and gv me the chance to get together for last time sweetie Please and please again lets talk I am online ok?
Lots of love
I just wanted to thank you! You know, I don't think you realize how much you inspire me. I am so proud of the person you've become and are becoming. I understand you've been through a lot and you've made not the best of choices, but I can see that you have grown. Though truthfully, I've always known from the very first time I met you to now that you were a strong person.
You are so full of wisdom about life that when you speak it really makes me think that I could stay there forever just to listen to your open mind, for it is peaceful and inviting. Moika, you have become my awakening, you have helped me see things in a brighter way, In a happier, enlightening way. For I was once drowning from my own fears, completely cynical about love, about hope and security. I used to think that no one understood me and could ever. Then one day, before I knew you personally, you flew into my thoughts and at that moment, though I wasn't truly sure why you were there, suddenly I felt reassured and a smile was brought to my heart. Somehow I believe deep down I knew I loved you then.
When I got to know you a year later I realized I wasn't alone and that something inside of you was hurting similar to what constantly brought tears to my eyes. I went through a time in my life where I felt worthless, unloved, continuously searching for happiness. I wasn't getting along with my family, and my friends were all hating each other, leaving me stuck in the middle, stressfully trying to pull things together. But, you made me laugh and forget everything that was going on. That year you became my escape, my survival. I don't think I could of made it through that year as strong as I did if you weren't in my life.
Moika, I thank you for all the fun times we spent together even if they were short lived. Now, over the years I have come to this conclusion: you must have been an angel sent by God to help me grieve and become a strong willed woman because no one has ever been able to help me see the light.Clouds of darkness shadowed over me no matter what any other soul would say, but you make me smile with just your presence. You don't have to say a word; everything's okay when you're Talking to me online.You know I thank God every day for the amazing people he has brought into my life because each and every one of them has changed my life in a very beautiful dramatic way. And I believe people are brought into your life for a reason, a way in which to guide you and help you see yourself. I like to call all those wonderful people my angels, my earthly angels. Moika, you are one, and I thank you once again from the bottom of my heart. And though we may never be, just know you will always live in my heart.
My love, you are so far and yet so close. You are many miles and so many moons away and I get lonely just thinking of the distance between us, yet in my heart you are just a beat away. When I feel blue, I picture you with me on a moon-lit night holding hands and planning our great future together. I think of the good times to come when I will be embraced by your love. I will be patient, my love, because I know good things come to those who wait. Until then I will be loving you. My Dear when we meet online today again, I would try to call U just to hear your voice ok? and then we would continue to chat online ok? Leo is saying Hi to you ok and bye for now , see u online soon.