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Letter(s) from Tatyana T. to Les (Canada)
My beloved I don't know what is happening to me.
I can't stop thinking of you. I have been thinking of you all night and day long. I couldn't get asleep.
I am thinking too much, planning too much. I am like a child waiting for something special, you know that feeling?
When you believe that something special will happen, you count minutes, seconds. Too many thoughts in my head drive me crazy. I become mad with happiness.
I can't feel the reality anymore and I don't believe this is me.
You know it is a strange feeling, I would like to describe it to you, and I would like to know if you feel the same.
I become crazy if I don,t see your letter on my e-mail, the thoughts like. Does he abandon me?
Did I say something wrong?O appear in my mind and I become afraid of losing you.
When I don't see you letter on my e-mail I feel terrible, I feel like the time stops, I feel like I am dead.
I am sure now that I want top be with you, I don't care what other people think, I don't care if it is against the normal rules of finding your second half.
I feel that I want to be with you with every single part of my body.
I can't satisfy myself with your letters anymore, I cannot live without seeing your lips, I want to kiss them, want to see your eyes and hold your hands.
I want to realize everything I dreamt of with you. Hold your hands like I dreamt about it, look at you, and look in your eyes.
I want to live for you, want to be with you in happiness and misery. I want to go asleep with you, embracing you.
I want to see you when you wake up, make you breakfast, coffee, honey.
Say you good morning, my sweetheart.
It is a strange feeling, but I feel that I could have a strong family with you.
I don't want to be alone anymore, but feel that there is someone behind me, who can protect me.
What does this feeling mean? I think I am in love with you. I am afraid to scare you with what I am writing.
It is silly, I am not a girl. I should control myself. Yeah, I should but I can't.
You have already figured out that I cannot pretend the things I don't have.
Yes I was hurt, but it seems that I haven't lost the ability of loving someone.
I want you to know about it, even if at the end you will hurt me, too.
I will forgive you, still, because my love is so profound that it will be enough for both of us.
Strange-strange feeling, I don't even remember when was the last time it was so strong. Probably, it was the very first time many years ago.
If only I could I would take a plane I would spend everything just to appear in your arms, strong and secure...
I have figured out that I really can receive a visa to reach you, probably that is the fact that doesn't let me calm down. Now I feel everything can be real.
Dear, believe me it is a question of time. Soon we will be together.
I will do all the paper work, get the visa, pay for it and take a plane; you will just need to get me at the airport.
As far as I figured out it will not be a problem, because I have no relatives in your country and no criminal cases in my life.
The only thing that can prevent them from giving me the visa is my salary.
It is not big enough. But I will try, nevertheless.
I hope you understand me.
It is a risk I have never been to your country, I am afraid a bit. But I know that I want to try our relationship, to prove them, to make them real.
Write me something on this account; I need to know your opinion.
Love you, love you, love you more than I love my life.
Miss you, love you!!!
P.S. I have made you some new pictures, check them up.
Are they good enough?
Mostly they were done by my girlfriend
Hello my dearest one, how are you today? As for me I am not really in the mood.
I have a feeling that I did something wrong.
I have never thought this could happen to me. That I could fell in love with the person I have never seen in my life.
I want to less the distance between us so much, to take your hand, to look into your eyes and to see that you understand my naive soul. I know I shouldn't be so open. I have to be strong and keep everything inside.
I am too emotional but I don't want you to be scared and run away. If I could be closer to you and if I could show you my feelings. I want you so much to see me, to feel my touch.
I would kiss your eyes and say how I love you.
Again I am acting like a silly little girl. I am mad at myself.
But at the same time I can't stop. I want you to know my feelings. I even thought of coming to you. And I have even went the tourist agency to check about the visas. And now I know that the best way for me to come to you is to get a tourist visa. It will not take much time.
And they told me at the tourist agency that I have a very good chance to get it. And it is a very good reason for giving me a visa. I've checked that a visa will cost $400.
(400$ for visa, passport, medical insurance and for all documents)
You know with my salary I just can't afford it. And I will need your help. It's up to you, of course. But I really hope you will be able to help me with getting visa.
Please, think about it and let me know.
Do you want me to come to you?
Do you want to meet with me at last? I want it very much.
Hope you too.
I will give you the information for the case you decide to do it.
The best way to send money is to do it via Western Union or MoneyGram. It is an easy and quick way to get it.
It is necessary to know the full name of receiver.
My full name is Olga Antonenko.
And after sending money, the one who is getting money should know an MTCN (Money Transfer Control Number), the sum of money that was sent and the full name of the sender.
Also you can send money on-line!!!
(please visit http://www.westernunion.com and http://www.moneygram.com for more information)
Well, I hope that you will think on this information.
You have lots of food for thought.
Please, write me as soon as possible. I am waiting for your reply.
P.S. You can send money to any Western Union or Money Gram of Kiev, Ukraine.
P.P.S. Also I have asked to copy the following instruction for you:
While you're sending the wire transfer you might be asked to provide information concerning transfer purpose and destination.
In order to speed up the process please reply that these funds are sent to your friend, relative, business partner and etc.
Please do specify that the receiver is known by you personally and also note that these funds are your own money.
Main reason for this request is financial regulations in receiver's country, so be serious and answer teller's questions carefully because incorrect answers could cause a significant delay for the wire to be processed.