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Letter(s) to Patrick (USA)
Hello Patrick. My name is Elena. I was glad to see that you have answered me. I will be honest. I was shy to write you and did not know if you will answer me or not. I have not much experience through the Internet, but I hope our acquaintance will be pleasant and interesting. What do you think about this? I will wait for your letter with impatience. I cannot write you much now, but will try to write you more next time.
Hello Patrick! I am very glad to see your letter! How are you today? I had a good day. Patrick, it will be very pleasant for me to have an acquaintance with you. Patrick, I live in a small town Gryazovets. I want to tell you for a first that I am looking only for serious relationship. I think my character is not a character of a girl who is looking only for a flirt. I am waiting for my life more serious things. Patrick, if acquaintance for you is just a game – I do not think that we will be good for each other. I am tired of games and people who think only about themselves and only about their interests. I hope you understand me… I send you my photos, I hope to see more photos of you in the next letter. I also hope you like my photos. Patrick, I hope that you have serious intentions too and we will continue to talk. I was really glad to see your letter and would be glad to continue to talk. I hope I will see your answer soon.
Your new friend Elena.
Hello dear Patrick! I all the day thought about how I will read your letter! Patrick, I want to tell you that I will be able to write you much not all the time, because I am writing to you from the Internet cafe. I have not a computer at my home. But I will try to answer your letters every day, it is very pleasant for me to get it from you. I have deleted my profile from the site, because I am tired of bad people who writing bad things, because of requests to send a naked photo or just rude words. When I was getting this lines, I was upset… Patrick, now I will talk only with you and I am glad to this. I do not ask you to talk only with me too, but would be grateful if you will support me with this. This way we could develop our acquaintance. Today I send you my photos which were taken in the school where I work. This photos were taken when we had holiday Day of Protection of Children. I am not sure if I have told this wright on English, but we have such day here and we had not usual lessons for children at this day. I teach children 6-14 years old and I very much like this. I hope you will like this photos. I wanted to tell you about myself. I work in the art school. It is a school which help to children to develop their talents. I teach in a sewing and knitting class. Children in my class learn how to do things from fabric and threads. They can do even some clothes. For example, I am doing some clothes for myself. In the childhood my mom have taught me to knit. It is help me to show my private world. I am trying to teach children in my class to show their feelings, their interests in their art. What do you think of this? In our school me have another classes, for example music, dances, poetry. I very much like to spend time in the school. It is like I am getting energy of life when I am with my students. Patrick, it would be very interesting for me to learn more about you. Do you have a hobby? Would you want to show your private world in some art? Patrick, I am trying to learn English better, I hope I have some success with this. If I cannot understand some words, please do not be upset, I will try to be more attentive.
Your friend Elena.
Patrick, I smile when I see your lines! I waited with impatience when I will be able to read your letter and finally I can do this! I need to spend about 30 minutes in walking to come to the Internet cafe. Like I was told you, I live in Gryazovets. Usually it is silent and safe town, but yesterday I was afraid. My way is near the park, there have been several men and shouted loud. I think they was drunk. I do not like when people drink alcohol and show aggression. But all was good, I safely returned to home. I am trying to be careful always. Patrick, I negatively attitude to alcoholism. I think you have heard that in my country it is a big problem. I do not drink alcohol. From the childhood when I was going to the school at morning, I seen many drunk people on the street. It was painfully for me to see that people just destroy their life because of this. I never could understand why people continue to drink so much, in fact it does not bring anything good.
And what do you think about this? When I have read your profile, I have understood that you have a good soul and I have decided to write you, also for me interesting to learn about you. I think that you are very good person and you have a good soul. I teach in art school. I have no phone because I do not need this very much. I talk with parents when I come to them, and I always can come to home to my friends to talk with them. Also to get a cell phone is expensive and I live not in my own apartment, bit in rented and owner of apartment will not let to have a home phone. If you want to talk with me, you can give me your number, I will call you as soon as it will be possible for me, because I will need to find a phone which will be able to make international calls. Photos which I send you today were taken in the park in my town. I like to go for a walk there. I hope that you will like this photos. Patrick, tell me more about your town and your native land.
It is very interesting for me. Do you have a favorite place where you like to get a rest? I like to go for a walk in the park. It is always help me to calm down after active and hard time. It is help to bring order and rest to my mind, it is help to think about many things. I also like to get a rest near water, I like sound of fountains, it is like a hypnosis for me when I hear sound of fountain. It is like all the world stop and wait when I will stop to fly in my thoughts. Maybe this words will bring a smile to you, just I wanted to be more open with you.
Hello Patrick! How are you? Today I had a good day. But I am a little tired now. My day on my work was sated, but children always make my mood better. In my class most part are girls, they laugh much and smiling during teaching. Patrick, their smiles charge me by positive for a long time. But other time out of school is boring and monotonous for me. I know that for many people their job is not pleasant for them, that time which they spend at job last a long time and hard for them. But I have been lucky and my job bring pleasure to me. I understand that you could not write me much. I hope you will not have problems at work. Today I send you a photo with a dog which were taken when I was in the village of my parents. This is dog of friend of my parents there and when i was coming to my parents, I also liked to play with this dog. I hope you will like this photo. Patrick, I want to tell you about my parents. My moms name is Tatyana, and my fathers Aleksey. My parents live in marriage for 31 years. They are example of big love for me. Because even now, when I ask my mom to tell about they acquaintance, she is telling me this with happy eyes and trembling in a voice. I think it is so sweet! They are the most important people for me. I am always sure that at any time I can ask them for support and at hard times they always will be near me. Patrick, I cannot tell you that my childhood was carefree, but I always will be grateful to my parents for this moral values and education which they gave me. My mother taught me to knit, to do many things from a fabric. I think that after this I decided to teach this to children. I very much like to cook with my mom, we often try to cook new dishes. What is your favorite food? My father like to spend a time in the garden, he is very calm man, always can give a wise advise. I try to visit my parents often, but they live in another town in several hours of road from me. They lived in Rostilovo for all life. Patrick, tell me about your family, it would be pleasant for me to see more photos of you with them. I hope soon I will be able to read your letter.
Hello Patrick! I waited for your letter with impatience! My day was good today. I spend my time with my friend. She is my only close friend.
Her name is Anna. We know each other from the childhood, it is like I know her for all my life and she is like a sister for me. But at last time we spend not much time together, it is a little sad for me. My friend work as a seller in the clothes shop. I like to talk honestly with her Patrick. When I have told her that I am talking with you through the Internet, she a little worried for me and my safety. She is skeptical about meeting through the Internet. I hope you are not offended because of this, because she is just care of me and want only good. I think that it is great when you have a friend who is worry and care of you, a friend who you can tell any secrets to. Patrick, do you have many friends? I think that such man like you need to have many close people. Tell me about them. Patrick, I cannot sit in the Internet cafe whole days. I need to pay to use the computer, and the longer I sit here, the more I need to pay. And if I will sit here whole days, it will be costly. Thank you that you have sent me your photo with your son. He is beautiful. I send you my photo with Anna. I hope you will like this photo. I wanted to tell you about my friend. She is married for 6 years. Now she and her husband Victor think about have a child. I think that they will have a beautiful baby! Her husband work as a driver of truck and therefore he spend a few time at home. He is working much and sometimes he is driving away for several weeks from home and when return to home, spend several days at home and again leave to work. Anna always have a hard time of being far from him. But I am trying to support her. We have a saying that separation make feelings stronger, but I think that separating is the most hard thing for feelings. What do you think about this? I very much like that I can tell you my thoughts, I hope you are good with this. I will wait for your next letter.
Your friend Elena.
Patrick, thank you for your letter! Today I had an unpleasant case… When I was going to my job, near the school my schoolgirl, she was smoking. I was very upset because of this. When she have saw me, throw out cigarettes and was scared. She have told me that she never will smoke again. She is just a child… I think that tomorrow I need to make a lesson where we will talk about harm of smoking. I never thought that this will be with children from my class… Patrick, what do you think about this? What I can do to help them? Maybe I am easy to upset, but all this day I think only about this unpleasant case. Patrick, thank you for your letters, it help me to distract and forget about bad day. I will try to not think about bad, the most important is to have more positive! Am I right about this? I recollect about what child I was in the childhood. My mother was telling me that I was very active, very early was fond of creativity and often asked my mother to teach me to sewing. Patrick, tell me about your childhood, it is very interesting for me. Have you been active in the childhood? I cannot tell you that my childhood was easy…. But I am very grateful to my parents, sometimes they was very strict, but always cared of me. Only because of them I have moral values and character which they helped me to develop. Patrick, sometimes I think that children in our time do not have the same moral values which had children in my childhood. What do you think of this? I understand that I am only teacher of creativity for children, but I am trying to give to my students more then just skills of sewing and self-expression. Patrick, I am very glad that in my letters I can tell you my thoughts. It is helps me.
Hello Patrick. How are you? What do you want me to tell you about what we will do? We will talk. I do not know what you want to hear from me. If you want to meet, come here, I will meet you here. I will be only glad to this. Today my mother have visited me, she have returned to home now. I am sad now… Usually when my mother visiting me, we together cook a dinner. My mother cook very good, she taught me to many things. Patrick, in the childhood I had a brother, his name is Maksim. But when he was already 3 years old, he died because of the sickness…
Today we casually had talked about this with my mother. She cried and could not stop, was telling me that Maksim would be with us, could have an interesting life. My heart is full of pain when I see her tears… My mother asked me why destiny can be such unfair. It is hard for me now to constrain my tears. I have been only 6 years old when Maksim have passed away. I feel myself guilty because I do not remember him.
Patrick,I always have a question, why children can die, they have not done anything bad, they just beginning the hard way in this life, but it is unfair that this way ending so early. Why? I am sorry if I brought to you a bad mood. It is hard for me to write now, I hope you will not be upset, I need to calm down and to get rid of this sad thoughts. Patrick, I will want for your letter. Once again, I am sorry for sad mood.
Hello Patrick. I do not know how to describe what is happening with me now. I am very sad. Today I had an awful day. I think I have lost one of the most important things in my life. It is very hard for me even to write about this… Patrick, today my school have been closed. This morning in the school was people from fire commission. After check they have told that our school is not correspond to standards of safety and they have closed the school. Our management have told is that they cannot do anything that we could start to work again. I never loosed a job in my life, but it is very painfully for me that I cannot spend a time with my pupils anymore. Teaching was one of the most important things for me. I could show my private world in this creativity, I was helping children to learn how to do this. Now I have not this, this uncertainty scares me. It is like I have lost a support under myself. Patrick, I do not know what to do now. It is have for me to keep myself in my hands. It is hard to believe that school have been closed. Patrick, I do not know how to stop my thoughts, I want just to cry.
I wanted to show to my pupils so many things. I was trying to teach them to many things. But some people have come and in one moment took all this from me. And all this because of some silly papers. Standards for them are more important then teaching of children, more important then things which I was ready to do everything for! Patrick, why is this world so unfair rigid?! I cannot stop my tears now. I will try to calm down, but it is hard for me to imagine that I never will return to the school, in my class, to my pupils any more. I will return to home now, it is hard for me to write in such condition. I hope you will understand me.
Patrick, I hope that you are getting my letters. You have not written me. Are you very much busy or you just do not want to write me? I just do not know what to think about. If you are busy, I wish that you had even some rest and could write me your letter because I will be very glad to this. I do not want to think that you do not want to write me because I love you and I do not want that you left me. Do you understand me? I love you and I very much miss you. Write me please as soon as you can.
Hello Patrick. Today I have spent all the day with my friend Anna. She was trying to inspire me, to encourage that I was not so sad. It is hard for me to imagine that my school really have been closed only because of that fire safety does not correspond to new standards. This school worked so many years, I know that there never was any bad things, but unfortunately it is not important for this officials which have closed us.When I have told about all this to Anna, she have embraced me and told me that I do not need so torment myself. She have told that I can try to find another job where I can teach people to creativity and sewing. Anna have told that I need to be strong. Patrick, thank you for your caring and supporting, it means much for me. I never seen such man as you. I feel that I can tell you anything and you will understand me. Thank you Patrick. I am so grateful to destiny that we with you have meet each other. Photo which I send you today were taken when I was at home of my parents. On this photo I wear a blouse which I have knitted by myself. I hope that you will like this photo.
Patrick, I wanted to tell you that if I did not had your letters, I do not imagine what I would do now, you letters is only bright event which is happening with me now and give me forced to resist to this bad circumstances. Thank you for this! Patrick, today I send you a photo which were taken when we had a holiday here at summer. I do not remember exactly what holiday it was. The face which I stay near was staying near sweet cotton wool. Patrick, I promised to visit Anna soon today and I need to go now. I will miss and wait for your next letter.
Your letters bring me a smile Patrick! Every day I am waiting for your lines with impatiens and it is pleasant for me! Patrick, tell me more about how you spend your days, I would want to imagine how you awaking, what you are doing at days, it is interesting for me! Here we do oau celebrate Thanksgiving and I do not know when it is. Today I was looking for a new job, it is upset me a little, but I am alright. It is hard to find a new job, but I think that all will be good and I will find it. If to think, I never was looking for a job, after I graduated university, I began to work in the art school and did not thought that one day will come such time, when I will need to look for a new job.
Usually all this interviews about job over as “we will let you know if you will be good for us”. Patrick, is it always so? Patrick, when I am getting a letter from you, I cannot have a bad mood. It is like talking with you became part of me! Patrick, I have such feeling that we know each other for a long time! It is hard to explain, but I hope that you understand me. I did not thought that I can so adopt to your letters, but I like it! Patrick, what do you think? Tell me about your feelings and impressions about our dialogue. For me this time is time of changes, but I am not in stress, I am grateful to you for this. I write this words and smiling, I hope that my words are not silly for you. I will want for your letter with impatience.
Hi, I all this day thought about what you are doing till you will read my letter today. I missed and I am very glad to see your lines now.
You are telling me that I do not read your letters, but at the same time you do not answer my questions. Do you realize how it is sound? I never seen movie love and a bullet. I will watch this if I will have a chance. Patrick, today I have woken up with unusual feelings. I have seen unusual night dream. It was one of dreams after which you for some time still do not understand if it was real or not. Patrick, it was a first time when I had a dream about you! I would tell that this was our first date. In my dream I just walked in the park, I was not hurrying anywhere, looked at people there, looked how wind disturb branches of trees. But unexpected, when I looked farther, I have seen you. You stand with a flower in your hand and smiled. Your smile was so kind and warm, it is like you wanted to tell “smile to me”, and I smiled and embraced you. After this we walked in the park, you hold my hand and was telling me something, we laughed and had a fun. I did not want to wake up, it was so good and I even believed that it is not a dream and all this is happening in real life. But at morning I have awaken. For some time I did not understand what has happened and did not know if we with you really had a walk in the park or not. I think that never in my life I did not had such romantic and light mood like in my dream. Patrick, I do not know how to tell, but I think that I love you Patrick! I hope that it is not very sharp for you and it will not put you farther, just I want to be honest about what I think. I would be glad to know what you think about this. Tell me your thoughts. Sometimes I regret that I cannot paint, often in art school I looked how children and teachers paint, I dreamed to learn this, but I was not good in this. If I could paint, I would paint some moments from my dream about us, it would be so beautiful! And what do you think about this? Would you want to paint beautifully? It would be interesting for me to learn if you remember your dreams and if you are not against, I would be glad to learn what dreams you have. I will wait for your answer with impatience. I hope that you will be able to write me tomorrow.
Yours and only yours Elena.
Hi my Patrick! Your words warm me! When I read your lines, I want to embrace you! On the photo which I send you today is my group where I studied in the institute. Here are all my classmates which have graduated institute at the same time as I. Patrick, your words bring many emotions to me! Patrick, today I dreamed of us! I was imaging that my dream was real, that we do walked in the park and held hands of each other. I am shy to tell, but I was trying to image how we kissed each other by the light of lanterns, it was the first kiss which like a lightning pierce a heart, because of emotions from this kiss, you can became crazy! I was trying to imagine how we slowly walk on the alley and you without any words have embraced me, looked in my eyes and with trembling and gentleness have kissed me. Patrick, I do not know what to do, all my thoughts only about this dream now, it is like a hypnosis. I close my eyes and I see this dream about us! Patrick, have you dreamed of anything like this? What do you think of this? I hope that you like this! Patrick, I want to be more open with you, because I have a feelings to you in my heart. I love you Patrick! I wish that I could look in your eyes now and tell all this and see answer in your emotions! I hope we will have such chance! I will wait for your letter. I hope you will be able to to find a time to write me.
Yours and only yours Elena.
My love Patrick, I miss you so much! I do not know how to tell you by words my emotions now! Patrick, I think much of you, when I was with my parents. I by myself have not noticed that almost all time I am talk only about you. My father asked much about you and he is worry for me. My parents want only happiness for me, but they worry for me very much. Patrick, I was telling about you and my parents are glad that we have found each other! My mother have told me that the most important is that I could be happy. They would be glad to get to know you one day. I tried to return as soon as I can and I am glad that now I can write you. Patrick, I so much want that I could embrace you now! To tell you about how I have spent time. Patrick, each time when I visit my parents, we sit to the table, cook tasty food, usually we cook together with my mother. I like it very much. I think that because of this I each time visit my parents. I have such feeling of some holiday, because we sit down a table, have a taste food, laughing much and can talk about everything. I also like to go to the nature, I like to go for a walk to the wood or to the pond. This help me to calm down and to think about everything. Patrick, my parents really glad for us, my mother have told me that she have seen in my eyes some shine, a spark. It was very pleasant for me to hear this. Patrick, I have noticed by myself that after we have found each other, my life have changed, it became brighter and got new colors. I am very glad that with you I have learned this beautiful feeling love! Patrick, and have you noticed some changes in your life after we started to talk? I hope that tomorrow you will be able to find a time to write me your letter. I will wait for this with impatience!
Yours and only yours Elena
Hello my darling Patrick! I have a lot of emotions in my heart now! All this time I feel like a time of changes, important changes in life!
It is like I am stay near the line, and if I will cross this, everything will change, but I do not know what to think. I also have doubts in my heart. There are so many bad stories about girls which left their country and was in bad situations. There are so many bad mans in the world. But I believe in this feelings which I have to you Patrick. I need a moral support now. I hope that tomorrow you will have more time to write me. I think of you much now Patrick! Today when I was cooking, I was imagine about how it would be if you would help me, if I could do usual things with you! I think it would became more bright events! It is like black-and-white movie which suddenly got colors. Patrick, do you understand me about this? Can you feel my words? What do you feel when you read this lines? I need to make a decision, to overcome this doubts, it is worry me and do not let me to calm down! Patrick, today I will see my friend Anna, I just need a support and her advice.
She is always helping me in hard situations and support me. Patrick, so many things has happened at last days, I have just a storm of emotions in my heart, in my mind everything have mixed and I do not know what to do. I need help with this Patrick. I think of you, think of us, I never had anything similar in my life! Patrick, if I could embrace you at this moments, for that all my thoughts have vanished, for that I could feel that I am not alone now and can hold your hand! But there is so big distance between us. Patrick, when I have awaken at morning, I have seen sun rays, I wanted to share this moment with close man, who I have feelings in my heart for! Patrick, I was trying to image how we together see a dawn and see how nature is waking up! When you appeared in my life, this was a dawn for my life, for my feelings which I always dreaming about! Patrick, I will over this letter for now, Anna is waiting for me. I hope that you will be able to write me.
Always yours Elena
My love Patrick! I am so glad to see your letter! I cannot describe by words how I worried all this time! It is seems like last days lasted eternity! I all this time thought of you and about your letter, I wanted to read this as soon as possible! I did not meant that I think you can hurt me. I love you and I trust you Patrick. I am sorry for this misunderstanding. Patrick, I do not know how to describe you my feelings now! I have so many emotions now! Patrick, I thought much of us, of everything. It is seems like till this time I just was sleeping and you forced me to wake up and now I can breath a full breast and now I can feel! I have feelings for you, feelings which I never had before! I all my life dreamed of this and now this dream becoming true! Patrick, I talked with my friend Anna today, she helped me to understand my thoughts and my feelings. She have told me that I need to do what is telling my heart. Patrick, you are this man who I waited all my life for! It is very unusual for me, because I all my life dreamed to feel this magic and the most important thing in life. To feel this feelings which are written so many books songs and movies about! This was for me like something not real, something what I never could understand. But now I have this feelings and it is the most beautiful thing which ever happened with me in my life! Patrick, I know that you are this man who I can always be opened with, who will try to understand me and will support me. Patrick, I decided to come to you to be able to feel warm of your embraces, to be able to look in your eyes and see my reflection in your eyes and to be able to tell you all what I have in my heart in person! I think that it will be happiest and magic moments in life! Anna have told me that I can go to travel agency to learn about everything. I will visit them to learn what is needed to be able to come to you. Patrick, I understand that it is very serious step for us and I thought much about this. It was not an easy decision for me, because I lived here all my life, here are my friends and parents and it is not easy for me, but I also know that I love you and I cannot be happy without you. I know that only with you I can be really happy and I am ready to do everything for this. You are this man who I was looking all my life for and with you I can be happiest woman in the world! Patrick, tell me about your feelings, tell me how do you imagine our meeting, our first kiss? When I think of our first kiss, my heartbeat became fast! Patrick, I trying to image how it will be when we will be able to go for a walk together, hold our hands, talk about everything, laugh, embrace and kiss each other! Oh, it will be so great! I cannot wait for this! I hope that very soon we with you will be able to do all this and we will be happy! I do not know how I will sleep today, I all this time think of you! I will wait for your next letter.
Yours and only yours forever Elena
Hello my love Patrick! My heart overfilled by emotions and feelings! I dream to share all beautiful in my heart with you! I want to look into your eyes, to tell you about everything what five me a love to you! I feel myself really alive! I am so grateful to you for this! I feel that my feeling to you grow up with each minute! It is like a fairy tail which I was waited all my life for and now I feel myself happy! Patrick, I do not know yet when I will be able to come to you, but I will learn this, and yes, we with you will be able to do all this usual things! I cannot wait when this time will come and we will be happiest people in the world! I am sorry, but today I was not able to go to travel agency, I will try to come there tomorrow! I with all my heart hope that all will be good and I will be able to learn when we will be in embraces of each other! When we will be able to feel warm of our touches and passion of our first kiss! Patrick, I think of this so often, I imagine how it will be and I think that I just will be crazy because of all this emotions when it will happen! I cannot wait when we will be together Patrick! Today I was not slept all night, I have been able to fall asleep only at morning. I all this time thought of you Patrick! I was trying to imagine how it would be great to fall asleep on your shoulder, for that I could feel your heartbeat and your breath. Patrick, I never had such dreams, my heart like have escaped from an ice captivity and now I can feel real life. Life where love can make me happiest girl in this world! Patrick, I so much want to be in your embraces now! I so much want to kiss you! I want that you kept me in embraces and never let me go! I do not know even how to live next day. I was looking for you so long time! I am so happy that life gave us this chance for a happiness and that destiny helped us to find each other from milliards of other people on this planet! I believe with my heart that soon we will be together, that soon we will enjoy each new day in embraces of each other! Patrick, I am so grateful to you that you have showed me this another life! I so much want that we could be together right now! I cannot wait for this! I cannot wait when we will be able to make each other happy! I love you my prince! I will wait for your letter tomorrow. Tomorrow I will tell you when I will be able to come to you and our dreams will start to come true!
Forever yours Elena.
My love Patrick. I do not know what to do. I do not know how to calm down. I write you now with tears on my eyes, I cannot to stop crying. I never felt myself so bad and sad in my life. I am just scared now. Patrick, today I have been in travel agency, I have learned about everything what is needed for our meeting. But it cause me much pain Patrick. I do not know what to do. Patrick, I cannot come to you, I am so sorry! But it is too big funds for me. I do not know where I can find such sum, I could not even imagine that will be needed such big sum! I have not any opportunity to come to you and I understand that I brought pain to your heart. I am so sorry Patrick! I can only to hope that you will not hate me now, I understand that I hurt your feelings and your heart. Patrick, you are the most important person for me in this world! I am ready to do anything for that we could be together! But I do not know what I can do now. I understand that you will be angry at me now, that you will not want to see me and hear me because I gave you a hope, I promised you and could not come. All what I wanted is just to be in your embraces Patrick. Forgive me for all this Patrick, forgive me that I hurt you. I love you more than a life Patrick! I am sorry that I was so silly and naive! I just do not understand how I could be so naive, that we can be together so easy! I thought that I will be able to come to you without any problems. But now I just do not know how we can be together Patrick. I do not know how to live now, because I do not imagine my life without you Patrick! Only dreams of you and us being together helped me to live last days, I thought that soon we will be able to carry out our dreams! But now all this dreams have been destroyed, I just do not know if it ever was possible for us to be together. I cannot do anything to be able to come to you and be in your embraces Patrick. Maybe I just do not deserve such man like you and now this world have showed this to me. Forgive me Patrick, forgive me that I have spoiled all this. I understand that only I guilty in all this. I can only to hope that you can forgive me. I do not know what to do Patrick, I want just to fade and to not feel all this pain. I do not know why destiny is so cruel to us and let us to find each other, and do not give a chance to be together. Forgive me for all this pain Patrick. I hope that you will not hate me for this.
My beloved Patrick, thank you that you have written me your letter! When I have seen that your letter waits for me, I began to feel better.
I feel myself so bad now. I do not know what I need to do. I did not sleep all night long. I all this time cried. I do not know what to do now Patrick, I was afraid that you can to not write me because of that I cannot arrive to you. I feel myself so terrible, I was scared to go to the Internet cafe, I was afraid that you can be angry at me. Please forgive me that I has promised you that I will come to you, and now I had to tell to you that I cannot make it. I cannot live without you Patrick! Only with you I can be happy! I with all heart and soul want that we with you could be together. I just do not know how to make it happen. I would give all for this, however I do not know where I can find so much money. Patrick, I do not know what you can do from there. We with you very far from each other, and I am not sure if it is possible for you to do something. I just do not know how we will be together Patrick. I would give all for this! but what can I do now? I can only to hope that some miracle will happen and we will find at least some way to be together. I love you Patrick! I will wait for your letter tomorrow. I hope that you will be able to write me your letter.
Yours and only yours Elena.
My love Patrick, thank you that you have written me your letter. Only when I see that your letter is waiting for me, I feel myself even a little, but better. I cannot live without you Patrick. It is so much painfully for me because of this distance between us, I just do not know what to do Patrick, I would give all for that I could be with you, I just do not know what I can do Patrick. Today I was asked all my friends who I know about help, Patrick, nobody cannot help with such sum Patrick. All they have families and they need to care of their families, to pay for their home, to live on some money. I do not know what to do Patrick. All what I want, is just to be with you Patrick!
Do I ask too much? I all my life waited for you, I all my life kept myself for you, and now, when we with you have found each other, this barrier has appeared between us. Patrick, I was telling you that I did not expect that it will be so expensive to go there. Patrick, I just have not such sum and do not know where I will be able to find this to come to you. I do not know what I need to do Patrick. I would give all for that we could be together! But what can I do Patrick? I just do not know how I will be able to find such sum for that we could be together. I love you Patrick. I will wait for your letter tomorrow. I hope that you will be able to write me your letter.
Yours and only yours Elena.
Now I see that all this was just some game for you and all this time you just played with my heart! I just cannot believe that I was so blind about you and for all this time you just lied me about your feelings! I was ready to leave here my parents, my friends, my home and homeland for only you! And you took all this as due! You are nothing, but liar. I hope that you got much fun playing with my heart all this time!