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Letter(s) to Steve (USA)
Thank you for your reply. I am very glad you wrote to me.
I am sorry you was unable to find my profile at personals. I couldn't make it to work.
To be honest I am a little sceptical about dating services in Internet and I didn't think it really works and I havn't checked my email too long. I just made a try... and you wrote. :) Thank you.
By the way my profile doesn't work still so I will describe myself here. My birthday is January 21, 1976. I am 29 now. I am Russian. My height is 165 cm (5'5"), weigt - 53 kg (123 lb). I will attach a picture of me, so you can see my appearance.
I live in Russia. And I have never been to the US. But I hope I will visit this country one day. I live in a small russian town Rostov. It is Kostroma region.
I don't smoke and drink rarely. Prefer red wine.
I work as a teacher at the school.
I keep active life, interesting in sports and outdoors. Also I am interesting in history, geographics and social sciences. I have a lot of hobbies, like reading and listening to music. Cookery is one of my favourite things. Also I like animals and children.
As for my character, I don't like to tell about it. I try to be good person. Enough emotional and sensible. My best qualities: loyalty, honesty, sense of humour, natural curiosity and simplicity. I know that I can't be objective telling about myself. At least I want people think about me this way. :)
What about religion, I am a Christian but not too religious. I think more spiritual.
Marital status: single, never been married. Have had some strong relationships in my life but currently is free. No children.
I want simple things. To be happy, to have someone to share my life with, to have family, to love and be loved. I am not sure Internet can help with it, but I like to try new things. Internet is good medium for intercommunication. And it is silly not to use that.
I want to meet kind man with good soul and great sense of humor. I would like he could be my friend, life partner and lover. I want to feel his need in me, his support and understanding. I don't need any prince. He just should be kind, sympathetic, decent and honest man.
I know that great distance may become the problem. So I want to start from friendship. I like to make friends and if things will not work between us we would stay in touch as good friends.
Well, I think it is enough for now. Tryed to write just a short note :)
I am sorry if something is wrong. This is my first experience in Internet dating. Tell me about yourself and what you think.
Thank you for your interest. Hope we will begin good contact and who knows what may happen.
I couldn't wait when I can come here to computer to read your letter. It really brights my day. Smile. I am really happy to get your reply. And I like we both enjoy our talking. Your letters mean a lot for me.
I have some good news about exchange program. I submited my resume and they picked me out. Smile. I will have an interview in two days. I am very excited about it. There will be few teachers and officials from department in Moscow. I have got ready but I am really nervous. I want to pass this interview and come to the USA.
Steve, yesterday evening I told with my uncle about you. He is exciting about our friendly relationship. I read him some parts from your letters. Not all, just some sentenses. Hope you don't mind I share that with my uncle. He is the only close person to me and I trust him.
He thinks you are worthy man. But he said I must be cautious. I can understand his feelings. But for me you are honest man and I don't think you can ever deceive me. I know I may be mistaken with my thoughts about you. Only time will say the truth. Smile.
To be honest we discussed about my possibility to move to you. Smile. Don't worry, it is just an idea. I understand that it is too early to think about it. But who knows. At first I want to get a vacancy in exchange program and meet you in person in the states. We would be able to meet 10 months. Anyway my uncle said that he will support me in my choice and don't mind if I move.
Steve, I don't know what is going on with me. I found myself thinking of you often. It seems to me that you are more than just a friend to me. I hope I didn't scare you off with my thoughts. Smile. I wonder what you think about me as your possible life partner? Do you think that we could have common future? I understand if it is too straight question. But I would like to know your opinion. I am honest with you and I want you to be honest with me too. We must trust each other. It's very important in relationship.
As for me I see you as my possible partner for life. I know we have great distance between us. But with our letters I feel you close. I believe you are the man with nice soul. I think personal contact is more better than letters via e-mail. But now it is enough to know each other better and see if we realy can have something common in the future. I hope we will meet one day... if I can pass an interview.
I have learnt that teachers would come to several cities in the US. Tell me the closest cities near you. Maybe I would be able to choose the city closer to you. Smile. There are some another details. The US government will provide housing for russian teachers. And their work will be paid.
Well, I continue to tell about me and my life here. My usual day is not too interesting. I get up at 6 o'clock and at 8 I must be at my work. It takes me about 20 minutes to get there by bus or about 40 minutes on foot. I like to go to work on foot because it is very invigorative. Morning, fresh air.
The lessons begin from 8:20. I have 20 minute for preparation for my job. Every day I have 3 or 4 classes at my lessons, it is about 70 or 100 children. I must search individual point for every child. Lessons at our school last 45 minutes and every break 10 minutes. At 12 pm I have dinner at local dining room. After dinner I have another two lessons.
At 1:45 pm I must doing paper work. It include register magazines, check writing-book of every child. I do it to 4-5 pm.
After work I return home, it is about 5-6 pm. Make some domestic things like cleaning and washing. Three times a week I go to gym, make some aerobics and dances. Sometimes I go to library and regularly I am here at Internet cafe. Sometimes I visit my friends. When I don't want to go anywhere I stay at home to read a book or play piano, I like to learn a new music composition. In the evenings I watch some film or show on TV.
Today I got my salary at work. That small pleasant event always makes people to love their work if only for a day. Smile. I don't earn large sum of money. Don't know should I tell it to you or not? Well, I let you know. It is 3600 rubles (about $130 USD) for a month. But I am enough satisfied with it. I wish I got more money, but I don't want to become crazy about it. I saw many people who wanted to get much money. Some of them gained it. But they almost changed their personality. They can't talk about anything, only money. Yes, it is difficult to make good money in Russia. But money is not my life goal. For my salary I can buy something of clothes and it is enough to buy food. For russian standard I have about average earnings. I have a TV set and tape-recorder at home. I don't have a car, but I can drive it. I have my bicycle and I enjoy riding it. Smile. Not sure how interesting it is to read about these things but I want you know.
Steve, how much do you make? I am just interesting. You don't need to answer if you don't want. How much teachers make there? I know that we have different life levels. But it is interesting what are expenses for living at you. I pay about $50 USD for my flat and electricity. In winter I pay additional 20 for central heating. I am lucky I live in my mother's flat. This flat was given to my mother by the department where she worked. Actually it is not my accomodation. I can just live here. I have two rooms and a kitchen. I don't want to complain of something. It is usual things here. I want to show you life here.
By the way how much is Internet access where you live? I am paying about 30 roubles for an hour in this computer club (about $1 USD for a hour). Steve, tell me about your the same things. I am interesting what is your life there.
I thought about my life and recent events. You know from my last relationship with man I understood that the connection between man and woman is very delicate. It needs efforts from both sides to be supported and developed. You can't just date, make love and say words. It is more deeper. My last boyfriend was a photographer. Some my pictures were made by him. He was more than just a photographer, he was an artist, a creator. Our parting was not a tragedy. In the certain time we both understand we are not together and decided to break it. I don't miss him. It was the best we could do. Steve I don't know why I tell it to you. Now I want to create full relationship and I know how to do it. I will try to give all my soul to my man and I need his one for me. Well don't get it too close. It is just my thoughts and I'd like to share it with you.
Steve this is my postal address:
3-1 Polevoy lane 3,
Rostov, Yaroslavl region
I want you know it just in case I can't write you an email. Please, don't send any presents to me. I would feel very uncomfortable to accept it if I would get them. Our postal system is very unreliable and I don't want you waste your money. Steve also give me your postal address, in case if I don't email you, I may send you some card to let you know I am ok.
I can not send you all my last letters. I send you my photos which were earlier.
Well, I must cut my letter here. Write me more. Everything you think and do. I need it.
I think I could try to call you this weekend. Tell me when and where I can reach you. Steve I don't promise I will do. I have never called to anyone abroad. I don't have telephone at home so I would call from paid telephone.
Looking forward to geting your letter.
How are you? I am fine. We have good sunny day today and I have time to talk with you.
Don't think I forgot about you. Smile. No, I think of you often. I am very intersting to know you more and I like we can talk via email. Is it OK for you that I can't write you everyday or regularly? I will try to write as often as I can.
To be honest I am a little nervous. Steve, you may ask why I feel so. I am a little scared about having new serious relationship, particularly, a relationship with you, because I want a relationship with you to work out. I want it to happen, to mature, and excel. Another reason I am nervous is because a serious relationship is a big step. A big step for both of us. And, lastly, I am nervous of the possibility that you will say something like "You are a great friend, and I think we should keep things that way". I think I want more. It is based on what you have written me, what you have told me of you, and what you have told me of your thoughts, life and so on. I think that I really want to develop our relationship. I know it may be premature for me to think this way. But I do because I feel this way.
Steve I had an interview today... And they took me. Smile. I am very happy. It is really stirring event for me. It is like the new birth. I even don't have any words to express my feelings.
You know yesterday night I had a dream. And I saw that I pass this interview. I saw airport and big airplane, than I saw new beautiful country and our meeting. Smile. When I went to the interview today morning I was sure I would pass it. My thoughts about our meeting helped me to do it. Smile.
Last days I thought about you a lot and I thought about us. I thought may it be possible for us to meet each other one day. I thought how real is Internet. How we can learn each other throught it. Really it seems to me that there is no difference what way we communicate. The important thing is that we can learn each other and to have image of our character in our minds. And it is great.
Steve tell me what is happening in your life?
We have big holidays in Russia in May. The first of May is the same holiday you have in the US, the Labour Day. Almost everyone has two or three days off. In Russian tradition it is like the beggining of summer. Many people go to picnics. I did the same with my friends. I know nice place at the river not far from the town. There is the forest and good glade on the river-bank. We went there for whole day, cooked barbecue and chicken. That was very nice day. I wish you were here with me.
Tell me what holidays do you celebrate? And what holidays mean anything for you personally?
I have to go now. I will write again soon.
P.S. I will try to call you as soon as I can.
I am really happy we are in touch. Thank you for your letters. They make my days. I think of you constantly. You are very close to me. I don't know how it could happen so fast. It is amazing. I feel you very close.
You see we both are sincere with each other. I think it is the way people must communicate with each other. I think that we mustn't hide our feelings and thoughts. I do it. I am ready to give myself to the destiny. I believe in fortune. I think I am lucky to find you.
I know I may seem too excited talking about "us". I just want you to know about my feelings. I like you and I want to develop our relationship. Steve, I miss you in the evenings. Sometimes at nights I dream of you. I see you smiling and whispering my name. You know I wish you were here next to me or I were near you. I want to touch your hand, to see in your eyes and whisper your name... Smile.
I believe we are compatible and we could be a great couple. Steve I want to know your honest thoughts about us. Would you really like to meet me in person? I want it.
I thought a lot about situation. We met in virtual space. We found out that we have common thoughts and ideas for living. We both need someone in our lifes. We like each other. And we will meet soon.
What if we don't like each other when we meet? I know it is silly to sit here and think about all these "what and if".
I think we must meet and see if the things will work out between us, see if we will fall in love with each other. Without meeting in person we can't create full understanding of person. I want to meet you and to develop our relationship. I know we met in Internet but we met each other. It means a lot. Well I will be strong and wait until we meet. Smile...
Steve, I tryed to call you some times and I could do it. I am very happy we could talk a little over phone. I was very gald to hear your voice and it is nice. When I called I was very exciting and it was bad connection. Also it was a little difficult for me to understand you. You see I didn't talk English to anyone before. Anyway I am happy we could hear each other.
Steve, I have already applied all papers to our department. Next week I will get my visa and passport. You know I still can't believe they took me. It was like a dream for me and it comes true. It is impossible in my mind but it is happening in reality.
I have learnt great news. They said I will have a salary while I am working in the US, also they'll supply an apartment for me. For 10 months I will earn about $30.000. I can't believe. I will be able to move to a city and buy my own flat. Or I can stay in the US and start my own business. Steve I am so happy. I don't like money for what they are. I am happy what possibility this travel opens for my future. You are also in my plans... Smile... at highest position.
Our trade union promised to pay my travel. It includes an air ticket, food, transportation and hotel until I settle in a new place. But I am a little nervous, what if they can't pay. There was a precedent when our trade union gave the promises and never held them. I know good person in our trade union in Voronezh. His name is Andrey, his wife worked with me and we are good friends now. He is dealing with finances and salaries for our workers. He said they are waiting for federal funds and money didn't come yet. Sometimes it didn't come for half of year. Health care is slow supported from the state in Russia and our trade union is not good one. This case I will need a sponsor. Don't know where I can find him. Well stop, I hope everything would be all right and money comes in time.
Steve, I can't think anything else, only this travel. New country, new work, new people and our meeting, all this excites me a lot. I don't want to stay friends. I want more. Smile. I am crazy, we never met. Not at all. I hope everything will work out between us. I just wanted you know.
I talked to my uncle about this. He is very exciting for me too. But he doesn't mind. He said "it is your life and you are worth to have your happy". He just said me to be cautious there with new people and you. Smile. I am not a small girl but he still thinks I am. Don't be mad about his words. He just want me to be safe.
I learnt that 20 teachers from different places of Russia will come to the US for this exchange program. 3 teachers are from our region. The first we will fly to New York city (New York state). There they will collect 4 or 5 groups and send them to different states. Your state is in the list. The good moment is that I can select the state. But I don't know what schools we will work at.
Steve, I am so excited. Especially I am excited thinking about our meeting. I surely want to embrace you and I will do everything that depends from me to make us met. Please, write sooner what you think. I am a little nervous about coming and I want you to uphold my spirit. All this is very new to me. This letter have might been mess. I am sorry.
p.s. I forgot to tell you. I will come at the beggining of June.
I don't know the dates yet. I'll let you know.
I am glad to come here, sit at the computer and read your letter. You give me good charge of the energy for days. I enjoy to talk to you very much.
Steve, this letter will be short because I have a lot of things to do here. I must arrange all papers at my work and pass everything to another teacher. I even didn't think that it takes so much time. Hope you understand and you are not mad at me. Smile.
Today I have got my passport and visa. They are nice. Smile. Don't laugh at me. This is my first american document. And this is my way to my future. I want to show it to you because you are the part of my future life too. I want you to understand me right way. You are the only man I know in the US. And I want to meet you as soon as I come.
I have a small plan for us. I will let you know the exact date when I will come to New York and you will wait for my phone call that day. I will call you from New York. I will try to learn what school or at least what city I would go and let you know. Than we will discuss another details about our meeting over phone.
Steve, hope you understand I would need your support at first time when I come. I will come to absolutely different environment with another language, people and culture. You see I am preparing for this travel but I will need you in any case. You are the man I know and I can trust. You will show me the place around, tell me about your traditions and habits. I will need you. Steve to be honest the closer time the more I worry. I am not afraid of new emotions and experience. But I can't do anything to stop it. How do you think is it OK?
I will come to our trade union today to talk to Andrey. He said there is serious thing to talk about and I don't know what to think. I want to come to the US very much but what if they can't pay my travel. Well I will tell you about trade union after I know.