Letter(s) to Phil (USA)

Letter 1

Hi.... thanks for your mail..Hope life is treating you kind ? it is was nice reading from you , i think it has gotten to the extent you know more about me though i hardly share my life experience with people cause it breaks my heart when i remember how life treated me ,but i will tell you cause our conversation is getter better .I am 32 years old never married or have kid i work as a voluntary rehab. officer in a less priveledge home and i have been doing that for 2 years now though it's a kind of job that creates time for me .

I was born in Sumner, Texas i lost my father and my uncle same day on a car crash when i was 4, that was why my mother and i relocated to BARCELONA SPAIN where she is from , and that where i reside now, life was quite ok for some time cause my mother remarried to an Italian man about 6years,when i was 10 years later i was raped by that man i tried talking to my mother but she never agreed with me rather she threw me out of her house that was how i started life on my own until now i was unable to bare the pain and agony so we went different ways , though we communicate once in a while i could not sue the husband cause i was young and dont want anything that will destroy my mothers happiness.

Though i lost my mother some months ago , she and her husband where victims of the earthquake that Occured in Italy, i was still dying of that big loss until i caught my boyfriend with my best on my bed i had to walk out of the relationship ,that made me so lonely this fews months so i had to join the dating site ,cause i want a man who is kind,caring, easy going and would love me for just for me and hope to bring out sometime positive in our relationship nomatter how short or long cause i have not really enjoyed life the way it is suppose to be i always forge ahead i dont want that anymore..My dreams one day is to come back to the states again cause that is where i belong if distance wont be a barrier i hope to hear from you soon i enojy listening to country music (DON WILLIAM) is my favourite..though we communicate once in a while i could not sue the husband cause i was young and dont want anything that will destroy my mothers happiness.I hope to hear from you if distance wont be a barrier.....

Hoping to hear from. you soonest
Jesse

Letter 2

Hello Phil. thanks for your letter, I must confess that I am flattered by your words, thanks for that, Phil after the death of my Father, I went through a lot in the arms of my mother and her husband, I have been through ups and downs in life, in the aspect of relationship and lot more, I decided to forge ahead in life and let by gone be by gone.

I joined this site to mingle and to search for the right man, which I know it’s hard to come by this days, in my recent relationships, I gave my best, but they were not satisfied with it, I was promised heavens by my ex., but latter ended in a heart break.

The right men are not easy to come by these days, so we have to take our time and get to know each other better, I am worried and afraid to go into any relationship before, but after I went for counselling, I was told to forge ahead in life and pray that the right man will come my way.

All my dreams had been coming back to the states, because I know that that is where I belong if only I come in contact with the right man.

I will be leaving you right now and I hope to hear more from you soon.
Take care
Jesse

Letter 3

Hi Phil i got your letter this Morning,how was your weekend,hope all went well,i will tell you my likes and dislikes
Hair colour:Brown,
Chest:88 cm / 35 in,
Waist:66 cm / 26 in,
Height:162 cm / 5ft 4in,
Shoe size: 3.5 UK / 5.0 US / 36.0 Euro,
Dress size:8,
Weight:51 kg / 113lbs,
Ethnicity:White / Caucasian
Eye colour:Blue,Hips:83 cm / 33 in,Hair length:Long

I like sea, nature, travelling, laughing to tears, literature,interesting people, miracles, sunrises and sunsets, design, art,swimming, skating, positive emotions, space and love. Want to meet my ideal man and live each moment with Love! Love to laugh, will try anything once… within reason… lol! Can be spontaneous! Love the sun and hate cold, except if there is a fireplace glowing!
Easy going!Love flowers! And I am a good cook! Always try to stay active! Love most animals! My match should be honest, sincere! A man of his word! And easygoing! Knows what he wants out of life! Must be neat and well groomed. If he can cook or at least help in the kitchen... that would be great! My ideal partner must be Ideal relationship to my mind is based on trust, respect,mutual understanding, looking in one directions and accepting each other the way it is with gratitude! Life is too short to live it not enjoying every moment!!

I dislike dishonesty,lies,cheating,anger,and things that turn people off.

I am willing and ready to relocate anywhere as long as i find the man that fits in this match,i work here in a Rehab home,i am free most time because of the nature of my Job.

Hope to hear from you soon and take very good care of yourself
Jessica Greenfield

Letter 4

I want to tell you something....right now in my life you seems to be the only man that i communicate to each and every day....i don't know what is actually attracting you to me...i now find my self going to the public internet cafe reading and sending you mails....I told Tara my friend yesterday about you...she told me that i should be very careful and i should not allow my emotions control me...i am avoiding a lot of this which i know you understand....

Saturday at work was so bored....i just took the time out to the beach..sat on the sand and thought about you... i am comming to like you more every tme we mail..you have been warned!!(smile).I am quite taken with you.i am fully aware that one day you may deciede to shoot me down in a blazed of glory.i understand that.i know you may develop a romatic interest in smiles that requires ending the romatic possiblities with me.i accept that.i also know that it is possible that i may deciede you are not quite the person that i am looking for,i understand the risks and reward of going forward may be huge.i am far more worried about loosing out because i didn't open myself up to you than beign hurt because i did.

I am expecting to want give you a BIG HUGE long hug when we meet ,i really don't feel any concern in terms of beign disapointed in your age or looks.i think you will have an opportunity to see around eight pictures of me.

My understanding so far is that you have liked what you have seen.without the visual cues and body language of beign face to face.i know that we are both interested in giving and receiving physical and emotional affection,i belive that would similarly flow to warmth in intimacy if,someday in the future,we were ever to reach that level.i think both of us have shown an interest in beign flexible towards the interests of the other.i would expect that i would be bringing flowers and writing you letters,notes and e-mail till we meet.
My hope would be that we could be more than friends,but there is a possiblities hurt fellings and wounded hearts wants to be very careful for now

Thanks...for appriciating that pic of mine...i have to keep fit and work hard for 45 mins every day...I went to the gym this afternoon,i will send you some pics i took in the gym tomorrow....do you go to the gym?..

I will love to come back to the states like i had eariler stated in my recents letter to you...i only work here in the rehad home to keep myself busy....i will be on vacation soon!!matters that comes from the hearth is soo fragile...i want to very careful never to make any of such mistakes which i made in my past life, i had been a victim of love and i don't want to fall into the hands of the wrong man...
I must confess that you are a country music freak,i love music that have to do with the soul..i love listening to good music,i also love buddy jewel,and Carrie Underwood they are great.

I will be droping off now and going to work....i will be expecting your letter soon
Take care
Jesse

Letter 5

Hi..Phil i got your letter today,I always look forward to your letters,everyday,you seems to be an interseting man,who knows what he want in life,I've been through more than a few unhealthy damaging relationships...and how with each time I felt as though i've lost yet another piece of me. I've taken every stone, every rock, every stick, every log thrown at me, the verbal, physical, even emotional garbage that came with them...I would take and keep all within, hurting only myself for that burden I decided to carry and drag along. I've never known a way to let it go.

I am so low doubting life and angry at the world. All i've been through,in past relationships.....and now the mistakes i've made,the hurt and disappointment i've caused...,I wasn't sure even if I was worhty of a second chance with my my life, and I know thats quite harsh to say, but thats how I felt?!?!

Believe me, i've had many awful thoughts looking for an easier way to escape my own misery, the reality as it was, I really thought I lost all hope and faith ...the light no longer shined...and I could barely see,I'm slowly realizing the things i've hung onto and have been carrying around is not healthy and that I should learn from them an let em' all go...
I have found the courage to do just that and be freed. These are lessons meant only for me to learn from, to prepare me, make me stronger and keep me striving to be all that I know I can be.

Tara talked to her mum about us yesterday and she said i should follow my heart..
Tell me about your ex.,what lead to your seperation,what do your daughters think about you and their mother's seperation,how do when your ex.broke up?what do you do in your free time?,everything you think i should know about,i am sending you lot of my pics,hope to get yours too.

This time of my life,i don't like searching for the wrong man,since we have been sending letters,i decieded to stick to one man,whom i am still searching for,and you are the one my search will definately stop right now.
Just like this morning,i think that this morning was a perfect morning at the perfect time when i got your mail.i don't think that is was an accident.i don't think meeting at this time in our lives was an accident.i don't think that we are an accident.i think that someone is looking out for us.i think that we have been brought together at this time of our lives for something very special.i can't wait to explore what life has in store for us

Truthfully, you are a class act. Even though I have never meet you, I feel as though I've known you for a long time. I consider myself a good judge of character, and from what I've read,You're so unpredictable and exciting yet so stable in that you seem to know what you want out of life.I feel You're so strong both physically and emotionally yet you seem to have a gentle and compassionate nature.I feel You are so intelligent yet so humble and down to earth. All these are endearing qualities which attract me very much.

Whenever I think of you, my heart skips a beat, and my senses swirl in anticipation of seeing you.You have become the Ambrosia of my heart, and I am drawn to you as a bee is to honey.

I will also love to spend my vacation in the states because i know i belong there...though its beign long i last visited....i hope to come to the states to be with you for my vacation and my vacation start on the 4th of Junly for 3 weeks.

Until that fateful,wonderfu day arrives, I wish you the best life has to offer.please take good care of yourself and write me as soon as you can.
Well, I guess I've said enough for the time being.have a wonderful day and, hopefully, I'll read from you soonest. If you get a chance, write me and tell me your thoughts.
Jesse

Letter 6

Hi..Phil, I hope you had a pleasent sleep?i am sorry i don't have a laptop,when i am less busy i go to the public cafe to send you letters,I do not know how to express the conflicting emotions that have surged like a storm through my heart all night long. I only know that first and foremost in all my thoughts has been the glorious confirmation you gave me last night - without effort, unconsciously, of course - of all I have ever thought of your mind and heart.

You have the greatest soul, the noblest nature, the sweetest, most loving heart I have ever known, and my love and admiration for you have increased so much since we’ve known each other that it still amazes me.

Last night, in my dreams, I saw you on the pier. The wind was blowing through your hair, and your eyes held the fading sunlight. I was speechless as I watched you leaning against the rail. You are beautiful, I thought as I saw you, a vision that I could never find in anyone else. I slowly began to walk toward you, and when you finally turned to me, I noticed that others had been watching you as well. "Do you know him?" they asked me in jealous whispers, and as you smiled at me I simply answered with the truth, "Better than I know myself."

I was at a travelling agency today and they told me that the flight ticket will cost ?1250...i talked to tara about this,she just kept quite and did not respond...so right now i am confuse,but i really want to come there,as for me here there is no way i can afford the ticket fare all alone without the help of Tara but she is not corresponding with me on that issue...she asked me if this is really what i want,there is no way before that day i can raise this amount for the two way ticket..hope you understand me...I would have loved to see your picture with your daughters ,i will still think about that...
Right now i am confuse and worried and i don't know what else to write or do,i want our story to be placed to this site,because i know that we will be great together,i will be expecting your letter soon.

Take care
Jesse