Letter(s) to John (USA)

Letter 1

I have spent in travel agency almost all the day, and now I have learnt what documents to me are necessary to leave Russia and to arrive to you my love. In travel agency to me have explained, that I could leave Russia and arrive to you, it is necessary for me to make the visa and the international passport that I could be in your country. I have learnt, that if I will do documents in this travel agency, at them the cheapest prices for official registration of papers. And me have told, that my visa costs 346$ and my passport costs 300$. For Russia it is very big money, and I have been very upset during this moment. And me one idea has come to a head, it to descend in bank and to take necessary money in the loan. But in bank to me have told that if I take money in bank I cannot leave Russia in general! Because in Russia there is such law, forbidding to leave the country if you have any debts for the country.
And then I have decided to try to take and issue the loan for my mum. But my mum already very old and now it is on pension. Therefore to me have explained, that the bank does not give out the loan to elderly pensioners. I have counted up, what is the time it is required to me to earn this money here in Russia if my monthly income makes approximately 98$ and from this money I every month should pay money for apartment and housing services of our state. Therefore 2,5 years is required to me approximately to save this money! Even if I will not spend many money for meal and clothes! But it seems to me, that it is simply silly and ridiculous!!! And I think, that to you ridiculously to listen to what I speak to you because for you it is very small income which I receive, whether not so?! But I have got used for a long time already to it...