Hello again, it's Natalya, I hope you remember me. I have written letter to you on last week, but have not received your answer.
Probably my letter has not reached you, therefore I again send this letter, I hope you receive it this time. Here my last letter and pictures: Hi Chris!
First of all I want to apologize for my delay with my answer.
Unfortunately I had no opportunity to write to you sooner.
I hope you remember me? I have written to you the short letter on free dating site and now you have answered me. I wanted to answer at once but I could not. Something had gone wrong with my email, that’s why I have to write from this address. Now please write me to this email address. I get the access to the computer only now and I am very glad that you have found time and you have written to me.
The name Chris is in your e-mail address. Is it your name? You have not told to me what is your name. I hope I have not offended you?
Even though you have written only one word, I am grateful to you.
Probably first of all I should write the most important thing.
I live in Russia. I hope and I think you are not very much afflicted that I live in Russia. But I very much hope that it does not frighten you.
I am the the usual women with heart and soul like many other womens living in the different countries. I sincerely hope that nationality and distinction of cultures for you is not the most important things in a lady. Besides, in the near future I am going to travel and probably we can meet and maybe we would become the big friends or even more...
Now I will inform to you about me in more detail. I already said that my name is Natalya. You can call me Nataly or Nata for short.
My height is 5 feet 6 inches. My weight is 115 pounds. And of course you should know that I am 30 years old. My birthday is April, 15, 1982.
Color of my hair is light-brown, but sometimes I like to change color of hair. I hope you are not disappointed very much that I am a light-brown, because I know that all men love more blondes? It is a question!!! (smile).
I never married and I have no children. Now I live in village of Baevka.
It's a small village, where live a few hundreds inhabitants.
My village is located close to the big city - Taganrog, in a southern part of the European Russia, near to such known cities as Rostov on Don, Shahty, Novoshahtinsk. I work in a clinic. I am doctor. I work as an gynecologist. In the childhood I dreamed to be a translator of the English language. I dreamed to work with our President to know all state and international secrets! (smile). But the destiny has disposed differently.
After ending school I entered the Medical University. And now I think our president doesn't need my services because I am gynecologist, and I think that our president would not allow me to examine him (smile)! Chris, I promised to share with you my picture, I fulfils my promise.
I understand that all people have various tastes and interests, but I sincerely hope that my picture and my appearance will be pleasant for you. But if my appearance doesn't conform to your tastes and interests, I will understand you, of course. I the optimist at heart and it's often help me in my life. I already adult woman; and I look at the life with a philosophical shade. But as though I did not try to inspire myself that I absolutely happy woman, I can't do it. I have fine lady friend, I have job and my apartment. But there are things without which people cannot be happy. And for me it's not material things. I have written to you the first and it means that I am ready to share with you my thoughts. I am very glad and grateful to you for that that you have answered me. Anyhow, I hope that you, just as I, have interest in our dialogue, and I will wait your answer.
In the end of my letter I want to ask you the most banal questions: what music you like, what movies you prefer. These questions are really interesting for me because I like various movies and music very much.
I with pleasure will tell to you about it in my next letter if you really want to learn more about me. Do you like your job, Chris?
Had you ever had experience in correspondence with a friend from other country? Maybe you are more skilled in this than I am? If you do not want to answer these questions, please do not answer. It is simply my female curiosity. I will be very grateful to you also if you will send me any your pictures. I will be happy to have your pictures in the computer. With the best regards.
Natalya.

Hi Chris!
How your day? I hope you are glad to receive my letter because when I have received your letter I really was glad. Many thanks. At once I want to tell to you about my opportunities to write letters to you.
I write letters on my job because I have no the personal computer.
The computer is in an accounting department. Lady who works with a computer will allow me to use a computer in my interests sometimes.
It depends not from me, unfortunately. I work from Monday till Friday.
It is Russian standard. Therefore I will not be able to write you and to receive your letters Saturday and on Sunday. But sometimes I work Saturday and even Sunday. In fact any pain hasn't schedules(smile).
Therefore, maybe I will be able to write letters in the Saturday or Sunday.
I understand that you had no time, but you promised to write more and I will wait! I hope you as well will answer my questions from my last letter because I want to learn you more. I will hope to receive your picture soon. I will be very grateful to you!
Well, I will tell you more about my interests. I like various types of music. I like to listen to classical music. I like Dire Straits. I like very much Sting. But my favorite is Pink Floyd. They are not similar to anybody. It is a great band. I like Queen, Madonna and many others. In World there are a lot of great musicians. I like Russian musicians but likely you do not know them. Have you ever heard of Gorky Park? They are Russians who sang in America. OK, movie! I like works of such Russian directors as Konchalovsky, Mikhalkov. My favorite movies are "The Barber of Siberia" and "Burnt by the Sun".
It's masterpieces of the Russian cinema. Also I like American movies very much. The American movie in Russia is considered like the greatest.
I like various films. I like dramas: Mystic River, American Beauty, 21 gramme, A Perfect World, One Flew Over Cuckoos Nest, The Shawshank Redemption; fantasy: K-PAX, Star Wars, Sin City, the Lord of the Rings, Dragonfly, melodramas: Love Actually, Scent Of a Woman, Forrest Gump, Cast Away, The Notebook, I am Sam; sports movies: Raging Bull, Cinderella Man; thrillers: Seven, Fight club, and many others, such as Godfather, Deadman, Once upon a time in America, Family man, The Insider, Erin Brockovich, Brave Heart, the Sixth Sense, Rainman, Groundhog Day. I like very much movies Quentin Tarantino: Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, **** Bill.
My favorite actors - Bruce Willis, Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Kevin Costner, Samuel L. Jackson, Uma Thurman, Tom Hanks, Kevin Spacey, Morgan Freeman, Denzel Washington, Jack Nicholson, Clint Eastwood.
My hobby, if it's possible to tell so - the English language. I have loved English long ago, when I studied at school. In Russia the program of training necessarily includes foreign language, as a rule - English, German or French. I have entered in group of the English language and I am happy that I made it. I like English very much. After school, I continued studying English at the university. I like this language. I have been studying English language for 18 years. I want to know this language perfectly. Of course I speak English. I only hope that you would love my Russian accent that I have without any doubts. I know that now I admit mistakes, but I hope you won't angry. But my biggest predilection that will be with me during all my life is the knitting!
My mom has taught me to knit in the childhood, and now I knit sweaters, jackets and waistcoats for myself and for my friends. I like to knit very much, and I like woolen clothes very much. Basically all warm sweaters that I have, I have made by my own hands. I do not know if in your country the knitting is popular, but here it is very popular. What else to tell about me? I have no children and I was never married, though of course I was in relationship and even thought that it will lead me to the happy future. But now I haven't anything except of bad and painful memoirs.
Chris, how you would describe your character? I never tried to describe features of my character to somebody. I live with a smile on my face and with hope in my heart. I think I can consider myself an optimist.
And maybe it has helped me to dare to write you. I saw a great deal in my life, and for 30 years I have passed through a lot of vital tests.
And I know that I do not need many things to be happy. All I need is a man, friend, soul-mate, love. And my life has led me to the fact that now I seeks it in such way. And I do not think it is bad. How do you think? I live honestly, and it brings pleasure to me. I know that happiness not requires many things. Likely the main thing that does not suffice me now is love. People without love cannot be happy. And I speak not only about love between a man and a woman, but also about love to a family for example. I have no family anymore and it really oppresses me. I always recollect my family. Chris, you meet your family often? I very much want to return that time when I had family.
Are you looking for the soul mate or just a friend? What are you looking for in a soulmate, Chris, if you are looking for? I hope to receive your letter soon. Sincerely and with the best regards.
Natalya.

Hi Chris!
Today definitely good day - day of dialogue with my friend Chris! (Smile).
How it is wonderful to receive something that you really wait. And in a case with me it of course your letter! Thank you! Today was a difficult day, and dialogue with you removes my physical weariness. The quantity of patients has considerably increased for some last years. Here many people lives in the remote areas, impassable districts. They lives even without an electricity in absolutely unsuitable conditions for a life. And it certainly becomes the reason of a plenty of diseases. The sad fact.
Sometimes I want our president to live here instead of the Kremlin, simply to understand what life is. Maybe in this case all wars would end much faster? Forgive me that I tell you about our problems, simply I write all what in my head. If you do not like to read about it - simply tell me.
Thank you for your pictures. It is a fine pictures. You are a strong
And handsome man. I very much like this pictures. It is wonderful, when a man combines force and charm. It happens so seldom. Forgive me for my frank words. But I always speak what I think. I think there is nothing bad in it. You have pleasant appearance and it is wonderful.
I only want to ask you to make your pictures small(size of 50-100 Kilobytes).
A picture that you sent is too big and we spent a half hour to download it!
Thank you for the description of your nature and character. I see that we have a lot of common features. You certainly an interesting man and when I read your words about yourself I began to understand you much more deeply.
It is wonderful, that you have children. Likely you are a very happy man.
By the way Chris I have asked you about your family in my last letter because it really interestingly for me, as all my family has passed away.
My parents were military, mom was the military doctor, father was the officer and we hadn't constant house because they very often got the notice about new place of service, in places with the military conflict.
Therefore my childhood was not very cheerful. We lived in temporary habitation outside of zone of conflict, therefore sometimes I did not see my parents some weeks, and I was at home absolutely alone, being an eight-year girl. Therefore since the early childhood I am able to cook, sew, knit and do any heavy physical work. Now I absolutely agree that it's correctly said that:"Thing that does not **** us makes us stronger".
Don't you agree Chris? When father got new place of service near to city Barnaul, I have gone to study in the good medical university in Tomsk.
I lived in student's hotel on distance of 300 kilometers from my parents.
But we had meeting some times in the year. Later my parents got new place of service and have left to live in the Baevka. And I saw my parents only once in one year. At university for the first time in my life I have found a true friend (it is Kristina) who is my best and reliable friend till now. We have together passed through a hard time when have been compelled to study and work in the evening and at night,- just to support itself. After ending of university I was to get direction for intern in Tomsk area, but I have received the letter from mom where she informed that daddy has been killed in military collision. There is nothing worse than to find out about death of the parent from the letter.
After that I began to live with mom because I was afraid to leave her lone at such difficult period. One and a half year ago my mom has died of a heart attack. I will not describe all pain and suffering which I had at that time.
Simply I want to tell that all ups and downs, all pleasures and misfortunes that were in my life have led me to who I am now. The destiny was not tender with me, but I am grateful to my destiny for my parents, I am grateful to my destiny for my friend Kristina, because it really a gift of destiny. And I hope Chris you are not angry with me that I talk to you about it? It is my life and it is a part of me. And how you would learn me more if I would not tell you it, really? And I as well would be glad to learn more about you. Your life is very interesting to me. Are you grateful to destiny for anything in your life Chris? How often you become tired on work? Do you like the nature, rivers and lakes, woods and mountains? Are you religious person Chris? I will wait for your letter so please write me soon! Sincerely and with the best regards.
Your friend (I hope) Natalya.

Hi, Chris!
Today I had so much work that I was afraid that I wouldn't have time to get your letter. And I have to say that it is distressed me. But now I have found free time and very glad. Thank you for your kind letter.
My last letter was sad. That's why today I will try not to write about sad things. How there were your day? Now I am smiling and have a good mood, because today we found out that in two days into Rostov on Don will be coming big exhibition of rare breeds of cats and dogs. It is great news because at this exhibition there will be the best representatives of rare breeds, collected from all of Russia. Everybody wants to visit this exhibition because it will last only for several days. I like animals very much. Can you imagine that I never was in a zoo? It is my dream. Have you ever been in zoo? We have here several small menageries, but I dream to see giraffes and rhinoceroses, hippopotamuses and bears. I never saw tigers and elephants in real life. Have you ever seen a tiger or a bear?
The biggest animal I saw in my life is a horse. I like horses very much and think that these are the most beautiful animals in the planet.
As matter of fact I have always dreamt to have some pets.
Unfortunately a horse hardly would be placed in my apartment (smile).
I dreamt to have cat or dog. But when I think that a little puppy will wait for me home, alone, I feel pity. That's why I don't have pets.
By the way, once I visited an exhibition of wax figures of the well-known people. It was interesting. I attached some pictures of that exhibition.
Thank you for the fine judicious informative, kind letter. I like to learn you more. By reading your letters I start to understand your heart, your soul. I am glad to find out your thoughts and reasoning's.
Thanks for sharing with me of your thoughts.
I sincerely regret about your father. I know what you feel, and if my words can facilitate your sufferings in any way, I want you to know that I bring to you my condolences and for me is a great honor to share your sufferings!
Thank you for your warm words about my parents. Your words - the big support for me in minutes of bitter recollections! You have kind heart. When I have shared with you my recollections, I have felt lightness in my soul. Thanks for your patience.
What else to tell about myself? I always very much get tired on work. And though my work is not heavy physical work but like any doctor, I am in constant concentration and an internal moral strenuousness, because the health of people depends on my attention. I am always waiting weekends with impatience. Weekends are the only one possibility for me to get a rest and to get new forces. Weekends I spend variously.
Sometimes I want simply to rest in my apartment. I live alone in my apartment. I have the one-room apartment with a toilet and kitchen.
I like my apartment - small and cozy. On weekends I always clean apartment properly. I like purity. And though I always try to keep clean my apartment, all the same, always in the weekends I find what work to make in an apartment. But when I want really to relax I listen to music or read books. I like to read books especially historical novels about ancient Russia or other countries. I like to spend time with my female friends. I have two best lady friends. When we meet, the air is filling with laughter. We like to walk and to talk; we go to cinema and walk in the park. If you want I can tell you about my friends.
I like very much to spend time in nature in the open air. I like the sea.
I live not very far away from the sea, but should tell that I have been there very seldom. I like woods, mountains, lakes and the rivers more.
Camping in Russia is very popular. I adore to go to the forest and to live in a tent though now I have such opportunity seldom. I like to look at night illumination and cars headlights. I like very much to look at the stars. In August our sky abound with stars. It is incredible beautifully. I like to cook on the fire. There is nothing more wonderful than when the fragrances of forest, mountain rivers and smoke mix together in the air. I am romantic undoubtedly. I really like to cook. I know that I do it well, because I started cooking from childhood.
My mother taught me many things including cooking. She said: "Lady who can cook well doesn't have disadvantages and demerits, because tasty food is a way to the man's heart (smile). May be she was right. We have In Russia many national dishes, such as an okroshka, uha, borsch, golubtsy, pelmeni. I am not sure if you know such dishes. These are Russian national dishes. Also I like Italian food (pizza, spaghetti), I like sea foods. Once I even tried sushi. What dishes do you prefer Chris? Looking back at your life would you like to change something?
I have to finish. I hope my letter was not stodgy and uninteresting.
I will wait for your letter with impatience. I wish you peace and kindness. Natalya.

Hi, my dear friend Chris!
Thank you for your letter. Day by day I feel more need in getting your letter. My mood has become better again when I have got your letter. I should say that when I have good mood I hear gratitude from my patients much more often (smile). Therefore, now the health of a Russian women depend on your letters (smile again).
Thank you for new pictures. I already spoke, that you are a handsome man. Your new picture confirms my words. You really very charming and attractive a man and to look at you is very pleasantly.
I would like to tell about your children. They are so charming.
They are fine angels, with amazing smiles, looking on which is impossible not to smile in the answer. Their sprightly smiles raise mood and generate a storm of a pleasant emotions. They are a very lovely children.
I can imagine that your family is very amicable and cheerful. I see that you know how to spend time together. It is so wonderful!
Thanks for your story about a zoo. I can imagine as far as it interestingly in a real life. Maybe one day I too will see it.
If I could change anything in my life right now, I think that I would not change anything. All largest and important acts in my life I realized, and did purposely, and if I burnt sometime, if something was impossible, if something was not got it only has given me the wisdom, it taught me to live in our complex and difficult world. Due to all difficulties that I had in a life, due to my up and down I am who I am now. Now I think, that if I had changed something in my past, probably I would not meet you never. And this thought forces me to be grateful to my past because my past has brought me to my present, and at present I have found such good friend as you! That is why I have no any regrets!
To my regret I could not visit an exhibition. Last days was a lot of work and I could not go to Rostov on Don. But it not death (smile). By the way, when I came to work today, my mood was bad, because my friend Kristina fell ill and now she is in the hospital. The saddest thing is that she has birthday today. She is 30 years old today. Unfortunately she will spend her birthday in the hospital. But I have already talked with a doctor and I will be allowed to spend evening in her chamber.
In the evening I will bake a cake, I will buy balloons and go to the hospital. I hope very much that she will have good mood on her birthday.
She is my best friend. By the way, she works with me in the clinic.
Kristina the doctor the otolaryngologist in our clinic. By the way, the otolaryngologist is the doctor an ear, a throat and a nose. As a matter of fact I have only two real friends - Kristina and Yulija. Kristina is a lady who is in the hospital. Yulija is our friend already for several years.
Yulija works as the conductor in a train and when she on work, we do not see her for some days. Kristina and I are like sisters. We like to take a walk.
Usually we walk in the park. But also we like to spend time in Kristina vegetable garden. She lives in an old wooden house. I don't know if you have seen such houses. It is the houses which were built before the Second World War, in the fortieth years. These are very old houses which don't have bath and running water. So people have to take water outside in the well. In modern world such conditions seem very terrible, but this is really so. We like to spend time in Kristina vegetable garden.
There she grows the potato, tomatoes and cucumbers not to buy them in the market. Every winter Kristina, Yulija and I together build a big Snowman in her vegetable garden, using a big snow spheres. We put carrot instead of nose, and potatoes instead of eyes. It is very funny. All neighbor's children came to see it. By the way, if we want to fool about, we put carrots not only instead of a nose but also below...(hint and smile)
First time we made such Snowman 10 years ago. Since that time we do it every year. It is a tradition for us. We poured it with water to cover with ice. So it could stand for the whole winter.
I like Baevka. Almost all people in our village know each other.
We have little buildings - maximum 2 floors. Kristina says that she wants to live in a big city. I don't know where is better. Big city is a big traffic, fast rhythm of life, garlands of fires, lightning's of shop windows, high buildings, fountains, cinemas, parks, attractions, theatres.
It is wonderful, of course I like it. But our village is a fresh air, a lot of trees and birds, silent and comfortable, cozy, quiet place, no hubris and vanity inherent for big cities. We have a lot of small and large lakes and rivers. The places are very beautiful. If there was no criminality, it would be paradise. But alas, the criminal in small cities, as well as in the big cities is an integral part our life. Unfortunately the crime in Russia is on a very high level. But I don't want to tell about sad things. Several times, Kristina, Yulija and I went to the festival of bard song. This is a place on the coast of the river where a lot of people come from all country. At night the coast is covered with thousand fires lights. The scene is a huge raft having the form of a guitar and established right on water and everybody who wants to sing together with famous bard singers, goes on this raft and starts to sing. And all thousands people become silent and listen to this singer even if he is absolutely unknown. It is the unique festival. I have to finish my letter.
I don't want but I have to do it. Today when I will come to Kristina we will talk about you. She likes to ask about you and I like to tell her. I wanted to ask you what makes you happy Chris? What was the best gift from a woman you got? Sincerely your, and with best wishes.
Natalya.

Hi Chris!
Thanks for your anxiety about Kristina. She has female disease.
It is not dangerous, but demanded to place her in hospital to take small survey. Now doctors have found out everything and probably tomorrow or the day after tomorrow she will already leave hospital, but will be compelled to spend still some days home to provide a rest.
Of course I will say your congratulations to Kristina. I am sure, she will be happy to find out that you rendered her such sign of attention.
At once I want to tell that Kristina sends you her greetings. I was in hospital and we have spent her birthday very well. I wanted to bake a small cake, but it has turned out on the contrary. The cake was huge. It weighed two kg. When I have brought it to hospital, we have divided this into set of pieces; and all doctors and some patients that were in this small branch are drank tea and ate a cake together with us and everyone was glad and happy. I have brought a lot of balloons. She was very glad and grateful to me. The day is wonderful today and the weather is good. The sun is shining all the day. To add to all this I have got your letter and my happiness doesn't have limits. So what about your weather? May be today after work I will take a walk. I like to walk along the street and to breathe the fresh air, especially when the weather is warm, even in the winter. As a matter of fact I don't want to go home. At home is very boringly and lonesomely. Sometimes I don't notice it, but sometimes when I come home with good mood, I want to talk very much, to share thoughts with anybody, to have fun. But my apartment is empty and I have to be in full loneliness. And my good mood disappears. I simply sit down into the armchair and look at the window. And when the silence deafens me, when I hear movement of my eyelashes, at that moment the hoop of loneliness compresses my heart.
I can listen to music or read a book. I can go to my friends. But in some moment I understand that I just deceive myself. In fact I want a beloved person to be near me, with whom I could spend evenings, to meet morning, to talk about yesterday and to dream about tomorrow day. I want to walk and to feel a strong man arm holds me. I don't want to cook meals only for myself. I want somebody to appreciate it. But I think enough about it.
Thank you for your fine answers to my questions. Your thoughts are very deep and are filled with man's wisdom. I like what you have written about the best gift from a woman. You are very sensual man. I see that you have considered my questions seriously and your answers are very clever.
Hi Chris, again. I began writing the letter in the morning.
Now already 4 p.m. Can you imagine? Today was heavy working day. My working day comes to an end soon. But, one employee has brought here her small son, and she has asked me to look after him because she should leave urgently for some hours. The boy knows me very well. He already some times remained with me and spent time. As our clinic works till 22.00, we can be here up to the end of work day. His mom works in our clinic only a few months and she has no friends or relatives here. That's why I already some times helped her. Her son is amusing boy. He told to me that tomorrow he with mom should go to dentist to treat his ill tooth. I asked him: What do you dream about?
He answered that he dreams to become a grownup because grownups don't have problems with teeth. It was so funny. I often recollect childhood.
I always dreamed to become a grown up as soon as possible. As every child I completely believed that grownups don't have problems at all. I dreamt in the childhood and I dream now. Of course, the world of dreams is an illusive world. We live in a real life, so we should not sink into the world of dreams and phantasies for a long time. When a dream becomes obsession, it can bring only pain and disappointment. Our dreams come true not always. It happens that you use all energy, all aspiration to make dream come true. But irrespective of how strenuously you try, not everything in this life depend on us. When the dream for a long time does not come true, dream ceases to be the star, that was for you a lighthouse in the ocean of the life. But anyway, I think that it is impossible to live without dreams and hopes. When there is a dream, the life is filled with sense. Our dreams force us to think, analyze, choose and come to a conclusion. The Faith and Hope are eternal satellites of our lifes. And regardless of what waits you at the end, we remember joy of the victories better, than disappointment and pain of the defeats. Don't you agree?
I'm surprised that I write all this to you. I have never had a man, with whom I felt conveniently in sharing my thoughts. But now I have found you, and I am very glad. Forgive me for my frankness. If I said something superfluous forgive me please. Can I ask some small questions? Do you like to sleep, or get up early in the morning? Do you like to kiss? (smile)
Are you a good kisser? (smile) Do you like when your friends come to your home or you prefer to go to friends. I adore when Kristina or Yulija come to my apartment. What clothes do you like to see in a lady? I will wait for your letter with impatience.
Natalya.

Hi, Chris.
I am very glad that you have written me. Thank you very much. You cannot imagine how much I wait for messages from you! Your letters became a part of my days! Now in my thoughts always only one question - "When I will get an opportunity to read your letter and to write my letter to you?"... And when I hear a favorite phrase: "Natalya, you can jump, you has received the letter!" (A lady who works with a computer says exactly this phrase) I really become joyful very much and start to smile involuntarily. Therefore thank you!!!
I feel it is not fair what happened to your friend. Sometimes in our life happen things that are out of our control and we have to try to cope with it and go to the future with our lives, though very often I feel that something are too cruel and not right at all.
I understand that you had no time, but I hope that you will write!
Today is a good day and to clinic I have come already with good mood.
Today at night there was a little rain. In the morning I have come out to the street to jog and I have seen that all footpaths and roads completely are filled with water . But I like such a weather. I like any weather. Many people do not notice beauty that surrounded them.
In my soul such a weather wakens the big energy and fine mood. I like all seasons. I like autumn. Yellow leaves, gold trees. It is so wonderful to walk in the park and to listen to how leaves rustle under feet; to see the clouds that float in the sky, to see birds departing to the warm lands. And at night the sky begins to cry. The rain knocks on windows and roofs. A lightning illuminates for shares of second the empty streets. It is wonderful. How it would be wonderful in such a weather to appear with beloved in a small room with a warm fireplace; weak light and singing of a cricket. How you think Chris? What can be finer than romantic evening in rainy day?
I at all do not know what season I like more. Russian winter is delightful. The all world around is white. And falls of snow bewitches, especially in the evening. When you see flows of light from a window, and on a background of black sky small snowflakes are similar to stars. And if for a long time you look at the sky, then it seems that you are flying through these wonderful snowflakes towards something unknown. I like spring. The world as though is born again.
Air is filled with freshness. All troubles and failures thaws together with snow. The sounds of the baby birds chirping for the first time. Summer is a fine mood, the desire to learn the world, to have a rest and enjoy life. I feel that I rambling on.
I really want to tell you what I feel. I get a great pleasure when you write to me. Your letters and your thoughts bring pleasure at my day and give calm to my soul. I think of you and I feel warmth in heart.
You have such kind heart. Something inside me prompted me that you very sincere and true a man. It so is important for me. I always think about you and it is pleasant to me. I do not know where I go.
But I am not afraid of it. Nobody knows what waits for us in the future, in one hour, or tomorrow, or in 20 years. I simply go there where directs me my heart. I'm listening what my heart says to me.
When will come time to do the choice, to choose road, my heart again will tell me what I have to do now. So was always in my life. And now my heart is overflow with unusual feelings, and I do not know how to describe what I feel. I do not feel that between us thousand kilometers.
I constantly think of you. I never feel such warmth in my heart.
By the way, I jog for many years. I really have good health because I always try to support my figure and I jog every morning.
I try to spend time in the air as much as possible. I have no car and I use transport extremely seldom. I get contrast shower - alternation of a stream of cold and hot water. I since the childhood lived in conditions of cold winter and damp autumn. Such climate is toughening health very well. I do not smoke and I do not drink alcoholic drinks.
I really love a healthy way of life. And I am proud of it. I love sports very much. Though should admit that I never played golf, football and basketball, never boxed. But I could surprise you, if I had opportunity to compete with you in beach volleyball. By the way, when I studied at university, I visited section of swimming and have reached good results. Some times I participated in swim competitions.
Swimming - till now my favorite kind of sports. Chris, I send my pictures. I hope you will like it. I for a long time thought and have decided to send a picture - only for you... So, this picture really only for you! I hope you understand... I have to finish. With the best regards and with thoughts of you. Natalya

Hi my dear friend, Chris!!!!
I am very glad that you have written. Many thanks. You have again raised my mood and have placed a happy smile into my face.
I see your kindness; and all that you want in your life is so similar to what I want. You are a most romantic man, and you are looking for in the life the simple pleasures which will make the soul of any woman a blossoming garden. You are a very funny man, and all your dreams are filled with desire to love and to be loved, to wish and to be desired to woman. I imagined many times all what you have described in your letters. The woman who will win your heart will be the happiest woman.
You are able to make a life colorful, varied, funny and romantic.
You possess inexhaustible energy. Your heart is filled with tenderness and kindness. You are a man each woman would dream about.
I never thought that I meet a man who is so similar to me in desires and dreams. When I read your letters, I closed my eyes and saw all that you described. And it brought pleasure into my heart.
By the way Chris, today I went to job being absolutely confident that your letter waits for me. Earlier I always went with thought that you probably yet have not written, but today for the first time I went with thought that your letter already waits for me. I went along the street with the smile on my face. I could not hide my smile. People that went past of me looked back and looked at me. Here already many employees know that I have found such a wonderful friend, and nobody is surprised that my friend lives in other country. Everybody only are glad. Nobody here is surprised if the woman searches for not Russian man. I think the cultural distinction is a wonderful thing. I don't understand Russian men and their culture of dialogue with woman. They are not able to appreciate woman's feelings, her fidelity, love. They do not appreciate sincerity and aspiration of woman to do for a man absolutely everything. The only thing she need - the warmth and caress, which she wants to get from a man. It is the problem of Russian men. Russian lady does everything for a man but doesn't get anything from him. All what she needs is at least a couple of tender words and gentle touching of his arms. Really it is so difficult?
Really it is difficult to present for your lady a romantic evening and a supper with candles? In Russia as a rule such gift give lady to man, but not man to lady. You say that I am beautiful. In Russia I am not considered like a beautiful lady. I am usual and simple woman with usual appearance. Russian men, practically all of them, usually show disrespect to ladies. They consider that woman only have to work, to cook, to wash cloths and entertain a man when he wants. For Russian man to offend a woman is a usual thing. I like to cook and to wash cloths but sometimes I would like to receive simple caress, love and attention. I don't want to offend all men. Of course there are good men in Russia, but there are few of them. Men very often say ***** words (not normative lexicon) when they talk with lady and consider that there is nothing bad in it. I want to tell you about my ex-boyfriend. I feel that you will understand me. I had boyfriend. We had good time together. He was kind. But he liked to drink.
When he got ***** he became an absolutely other person. He talked with me by bad and ***** words. The time passed and his love to alcohol became a habit. He became another person - rude and evil, even when did not drink.
He has found the big interest in beating of me. He began to beat me very often and cruelly. He often knocked me in my face by fist and even kicked me by foot when I already was on a floor. And every time when I being on a floor looked in to his eyes, and with tears in my eyes asked him - WHY? - he just responded that any man is a King and a place of any woman - under foot of a true man. But the next day he smiled and talked with me as if nothing had happened. In public he was very delicate, polite. All people considered that he is a true gentleman. But when he found oneself at home, everything was on the contrary. I very much was afraid of him and I have left him. My soul was wounded very much. After this I couldn't make myself get acquainted with another man. I don't trust Russian men. I am afraid to give my love, but back to get roughness instead of love. I have told to you about it because I want you to know that I open to you my soul. And I want you to know about my ex-relationship with my ex-boyfriend. I feel that I can tell to you about this because I feel that you have very kind heart. By the way, today Kristina leaves hospital! And though she will spend some more days at home, all the same it is much better than in hospital.
If you have disagreements with lady, can you apply roughness?
Are you able to transform quarrel into the peace, pleasure and a smile?
I hope my letter have not offended you in any way.
I have to finish. With all my kindness and tenderness.
Natalya.

Hi, Chris!
How is your mood? I hope that up to my letter your mood was fine, but after my letter your mood became superfine (smile) Likely I am too self-confident. But I am happy again because I have again received your letter. I so waited for this minute,- when I can write to you.
Our friendship became the important part of my life, and I hope that in your life as well. Sometimes I understand that the thread that connects me with you now is not most strong. But I do not want this thread to be torn. Right now I sit and I smile simply because I am glad that again I can to share with you my thoughts. Sometimes I so want you to see my smile during the similar moment because I think it is the most sincere smile! But sometimes my smile leaves me because I know that now the only thing that connects us is our thoughts, that we send to each other,- thoughts, transformed into a letters that are not able to show all depth of thoughts. But at the same time I understand that nobody knows what waits for us in the future. I hope my words do not offend you and maybe you even think just as I...
Thanks for all your words. I am very glad that you have expressed to me your opinion. It is pleasant for me to realize that I have a friend - a true man. I really do not understand how people can be very angry if they love each other. I do not remember when at last time I became angry. I do not like to be angry and I do not like to quarrel. I know absolutely precisely that any disagreements can be solved with a smile on the face. I try never to raise a voice. To force me to cry easier than to make me mad. I like to conciliate people and when my friends in the quarrel, I always act as conciliator. When I am upset, it can be understood on my eyes. Kristina says that when I am upset, I have such sad eyes that after looking at me she wants to cry. Probably it is the truth because when I am upset, everyone notices it. I become silent and imperceptible. I as always talk with people, I smile, but all the same everyone see that something wrong with me. To carry quarrel into the bed or to leave problem on tomorrow 's day is wrong. I never would do that. I never can be in a disagreement more than several minutes.
I feel very much not comfortably if I am in a disagreement .
Therefore I always try to reconcile at once. If people love each other and respect feelings and interests of each other, I am sure that serious disagreements cannot be the case. I always take into account an opinion of other people; therefore I very seldom have disagreements with somebody. I respect any mind. And I am sure that any quarrel can be discussed simply in quiet conversation. It is enough to express your opinion and attentively and respectfully to listen to opinion of your beloved. And the decision will come. And what can be more pleasant than a soft kiss after a short disagreement? Really?
Thanks for the story about your wife. I understand your pain. You have very kind heart. I am so sorry that your wife has betrayed you and your feelings.
You asked me if I ever been outside of Russia. My knowledge of other countries is limited by television show. Unfortunately outside Russia I was not. Likely it is very interesting. When I leave somewhere from city even if it is not far from my city, I am glad very much. Hardly this can be named travel. But, for me is so. But Russia is really the huge country and I really have been in many places. I saw many beautiful and old cities, I saw the various nature, and it is really interesting, because Russia is very long country and we have 11 time zones and many climatic zones with the various nature, vegetation and animals. I like ancient cities more, with temples, churches, like Tver, Ryazan. But unfortunately I never visited St.Petersburg and Moscow. I always dreamed about travel, but never reflected on where I want to travel. I think it would be most delightfully to travel there where I will be waited by a man, dear to my heart.
I am so sorry that you heard only such bad things about women from Our country. Such women disgrace our country and though I always had pride for Russian people and women, it is a shame to me, that these women are Russian. Actually in Russia many good, fair and kind ladies.
I understand what opinion now you have about Russian people. But in Russia really many good girls. I sincerely regret that you heard only such bad things about bad people. I will not try to deny or justify it because I really admit that in our country there are women who put material values above any others. But at the same time, as far as I know, similar people are in any country of the world where the standard of living does not come up to anticipations that people deserve. Anyhow, as for bad ladies from our country, I sincerely regret that you heard only such bad things. It is the huge country and in scales of all country, quantity of people spoiling reputation of the country certainly incomparably less in comparison with quantity of kind and sincere people. In Russia speaks: "One rotten egg spoils all fried eggs"! (Smile). Please, do not think that in Russia only bad women. I think that such people there are everywhere.
Russian women actually are very kind, patient and sincere.
I can give you my address, but you should not send anything with the exception of letters. Please do not send any parcels. Our Territory - the center of terrorism where concentrated a lot of terrorists from Northern Caucasus and Chechen Republic, and their supporters, and getting of mail from other country is unsafely for Russian people living in Rostov area, because some supporters of terrorists can cause me physical harm if find out about sending from other country. Russian custom house checks everything, and customs officers decide what to skip and what to confiscate or detain. If customs officer will sold or simply give your sending to any interested person, or simply will open it ostensibly for checking assignment of contents and simply will report to bad people my address, my life will undergo danger. It is unsafe for my life. For this reason I ask you to send only letters. If you want to send me letter, it should have the minimal sizes and do not draw attention of custom house. Promise?
Tomorrow difficult day waits for me. Probably tomorrow I will work outside of clinic. We call it - "the ride working day".
Kristina also goes with us. She already is completely healthy and begins work.
It is difficult day. At this day several doctors and specialists of our clinic are going on the special medical bus to various remote small settlements, small villages in a thicket of the forest. These are poor villages which are located far away from the big cities and settlements. In these villages there are no doctors and clinics and people cannot visit clinic at any moment. In such villages there is always a lot of people who need the doctor but cannot reach clinic by self. Often it is a people who are not able to live without help of other people, - basically are small children or old and weak feeble people. We go in these villages on the bus with all necessary equipment. People in these villages love us and wait more than anything. But it is really the hard work if to take into account that we are going there at 6 am, and we come back sometimes even after 10 pm! But I will wait your letter because our friendship gives force to me, and our dialogue is a rest for my soul! My dear friend Chris!
I have to go! Sincerely and with thoughts about you.
Natalya. P.S. I have found some my old pictures when I was the child.
I do not remember, I spoke you that I enjoy fishing? I was child and I did not fishing, but I went with my father on fishing.

Hi my dear Chris!
Today is a fine day. Already in the morning I knew that I today I will get an opportunity to write to you. And all the rest become unimportant for me. Today I really haven't opportunity to write much.
Please forgive me. But I have enough time to tell to you that I thought of you and waited when I will get opportunity to write you.
Thank you for old pictures. I very much like your pictures.
And I have time to tell the main thing. I do not know why, but today I have woken up earlier than usually. I could not fall asleep again.
I simply sat near window and looked at the sky. Suddenly, a small birdie appeared on my window. It was very beautiful birdie. This birdie looked at me, and started to twitter. It was so unusually and beautifully. It was a beautiful song. I looked at this small birdie and thought, that you Chris now somewhere far away; maybe you sleep and see me in your sleep-dream. And I so wanted you to see this small birdie and to hear her delightful song. And I have whispered: "Fly off, my little birdie, fly to my friend Chris, and tell to him that one girl, that is so far away, thinks of him and sends to him this song. And at this moment the birdie has flinched and flew away as if this birdie has heard my words!
And I have thought, if today you Chris will see a small birdie singing beautiful song, - be sure that it is my birdie I sent to you!
Forgive me, but I have to go. I want to send you my kiss if you do not mind.
Your Natalya. P.S. I have a surprise for you. I hope you like my pictures?
I take these pictures specially for you.

Hi, my far, but dear friend Chris.
Many thanks for your letter. It was the long-awaited letter.
I am really madly glad to receive your letter. I am really glad that I have found you. I want to tell you today so much.
Thank you for your diligence to write to me in Russian! It really has sense.
I do not know what is the time difference between us. But I live in the third time zone. We have Moscow time. If you know what is the time difference between Moscow and your city it is our difference.
Today I wanted to say just the right things to you. I didn't want to offend or upset you in anyway, and it really bothered me that saying something wrong may do that. I always speak directly from my heart but sometimes, words must be chosen carefully. I feel somewhat lost when I have no opportunity to use a computer to read your letter. In my soul, I feel contentment and joy when I think of you. I have never done this in my life, (tried to initiate a relationship halfway across the world), but I am more than willing to learn whatever is need to succeed, if it is your desire as well. I also believe that couples should be the best friends, which trust and share with each other everything that they feel.
I don't know if my word and thoughts make sense to you; and for me so hard to put them in typed words that you will feel and understand. I believe in God, and I believe that I have been put through trials to be ready for meeting a man with whom I will spend the rest of my life in loving, to better value him, respect him and cherish the love that he would give me; only asking that I return the same. I hope that my words and letters are not boring to you, but they are much more than mere words, they are my thoughts and feelings, and I send them out to you. I wish to know you on the more intimate level, I would like you to share your true dreams, your hopes, your feelings of the heart with me, I truly wish to connect with you on a level that goes way beyond simply friendship. Please don't think that I am fool for thinking these things, I believe that to succeed in anything, you have to be honest, and that is what I am doing with you. Could you seriously close your eyes for just a minute, and think and dream of what a life we could share, what it would be like,- the fun of learning each other. I really believe that dreams really come true for the people that dare to believe in dreams, because if they believe in them enough hard, dreams could become in reality. Here, where I was raised, the gift of true love from a man is something that is more similar to a Mirage or self-deception, rather than mutual feeling which two enamored people can give each other. I hope that I am not rambling on with my words.
I have so much that I wish to share with you, and each time I write to you, I feel there is never enough time to say everything that I want to say, and I always feel that I have forgotten something important that I wanted to share with you. Chris, I want to tell that you are very beautiful for me. I mean the beauty that is within you, beauty of your internal world.
It is a type of beauty that is very special and rare. Most men have only appearances, but not have beauty inside, and this is where true beauty is.
This is what for me is the most important and significant in all limits of my character, my soul and my consciousness. I think that you are truly handsome, in the sence of what beauty should be. I want to reduce essence of my entire letter only to one thought. I don't know if I could clearly explain all my thoughts and feelings, which overflow me now, or not. I want to tell that I feel, we become very good friends and I really enjoy our friendship. I aspire to learn you more and I dare to hope that you suppose a thought that our relations can develop more than it enough for simple friendship. It's the way I feel. I'll look forward to your reply as always with anticipation and impatience....
I hope that your reply will not have of a harsh nature, and I look forward of its arrival. With tenderness, Your Natalya.

Hi Chris! Your letter means so much for me. Thank you.
I so waited your letter and so wanted to find out what you will tell me.
Thanks for your words and thanks for your feelings. Your words have touched my heart and have penetrated into depth of my soul. Thanks for your sincerity and tenderness. And thank you for your feelings! I never thought that in the world there is a man who can make me feel like flower only by means of words. Thank you that you have brought spring into my heart!
Thank you for new pictures. They are so charming, I have no words. I can look at their fine faces and sincere pure smiles infinitely. They radiate happiness and rise my mood. I can imagine how you are happy when you see these amazing beautiful small smiles.
Chris, today I write to you with special worry but as well with pleasure and hope. I really hope that everything that I will tell you today will make you happy. Last time when I wrote you my honest letter I had the big sadness in my heart, and even though I tried to not show it, I think you have noticed it. Chris, I was sad because the boss informed me that approximately in three weeks the accounting department will be closed for full re-equipment and repair. And when he have told me it, I thought my heart will stop, because when it will take place, I will not be able to communicate with you during several months! And it has brought infinite sadness into my heart. But after my boss informed me about close of accounting department, the accounting department informed me that approximately in three weeks I will get my vacation! When I thought that I can lose you for some months, inside my soul I at once have felt that I can't simply accept it. And I have felt that together with sadness in my heart has appeared an other feeling - feeling of confidence, desire to make new steps instead of simply waiting for something. I have understood that our relations are important for me much more than I thought. And it so wonderfully. I had no vacation for two years. And now I will have vacation. But a thoughts that I will not be able to communicate with you, to receive your letters and to write mine,- all these thoughts has brought a pain to me, pain that I can't endure. I talked with Kristina and she has asked me what I think to do.
And when she has asked me it, I have understood that inside my soul I already know the answer to this question. And I have told that I do not want to spend such a long-awaited vacation in loneliness. I can't accept a thought that I will not talk to you Chris during of month or two. And I have told that I want to meet you Chris! I have told her that I want to spend my vacation with you Chris! I can come to you, and we can spend time together if you want. And first I was afraid that if I will tell you about it in the letter, you will write me that you do not want to see me or can not meet me. And it would hurt my heart. But Kristina have told, that you Chris and I are such a good friends, our relations are built on sincerity, therefore Chris will be happy to spend time with me. And I really think that it would be delightfully. So, what you will say, Chris, if I will offer you a meeting? Would you be happy to see me and to spend with me several days? I cannot imagine at all how it would be wonderful.
You would show me your life, we would learn each other in a real life.
We would look into the eyes of each other, we could hold our hands, tell each other silly stories, laugh and tease each other, watch the stars in the night sky and have romantic evening, go to the movie or we could simply sit on a bench in the park, and who knows what else we could do together...
I would be happy to do all this together with you, instead of again be lonely without you and our friendship. I simply want to meet you.
I already knew and I have been told earlier, but I have found out again all I need to do to come to your country. I already have the passport. And I will avoid usual procedure of visa's approval. Being the doctor, I can ask the visa on behalf of our Ministry of Health, because if the applicant have good official support from official bodies, if the applicant have official recommendations and directions to various sorts of conference, seminars, - it will relieve of necessity to wait for some months the decision of the commission, and will remove all problems connected with necessity to prove that the purpose of travel is not emigration. Being the doctor I will have support and guarantees from Ministry of Health of Russian Federation, and it is certainly the best guarantor. Of course I must visit improbable quantity of the departments, to collect improbable quantity of documents, to find as many as possibly of other official legal persons, institutions and people for support; to get petitions. But if I will quickly collect all necessary documents, I will get the visa in one or two weeks! So I have filed an application for the visa, Chris, with happiness and with hope that you will be happy to spend some days with me!
I do not ask you about anything. I will use my monetary savings and I will make everything by self. It is my vacation and I will not be a burden.
Would you be happy to spend some days with me soon, Chris? Anyway, we must meet. It is possible to wait eternally. But I believe that I will get my vacation not accidentally; and I believe that the accounting department will be closed at the same time not accidentally as well. It is not coincidence!
It is time to make a choice, to make the decision, to take new step. Maybe such opportunity will not be repeated again. I so long waited my vacation and I want my vacation to be especial. What can be better than a meeting of two friends? The first meeting. It is simply delightful and I thank destiny that I have got such an opportunity,- an opportunity to meet my dear friend, the opportunity to learn each other in real life, the opportunity to enjoy time which we can spend together. And I believe that it can become the beginning of something new in our lifes and in our relations. And I am really happy to get a vacation because it is time which I can spend in any way I want, and I want to spend this vacation with you Chris! So what will you tell?
Would you like to spend time with me? Would you be glad to meet me?
Would you be happy to have the first meeting at your airport?
I will wait for your answer with pleasure. Your sincere Natalya

Hi my Chris!
I waited for your letter with fear and with pleasure at the same time!
And I am very happy to receive your letter! I am ready to jump and dance, laugh and sing songs! And the reason - you Chris! Thank you for your letter and your thoughts.
I am so happy that we will meet. Now I have the ocean of emotions and I at all do not know what to say. I am worried very much. I very much hope that we can perfectly spend time together. I only am afraid, that if we will meet, I will asks so many questions and to chatter unceasingly, that you soon will escape from me. I get my vacation once a year. My vacation will begin approximately about November, 13.
At this time I can arrive to you. But unfortunately the schedule of my vacation is not flexible. Therefore I hope you will be glad to meet me at this time. If you have not enough time, I will be happy all the same. I will be happy in any case. It is better to wait when you will come from work, than to sit in my apartment and to know that nobody will come!!! Duration of my vacation is 24 workdays. But quantity of days which I can spent with you depends on when I will get my vacation and when I will order the ticket. How many days you want to be with me? I have submitted the visa application. It will take about one or two week I think. Complexity of approval of the visa will be reduced to a minimum as I will have petitions and characteristics from a work place, from respected organizations and legal persons; guarantee documents and a various sort of the information and inquiry, which will give to commissions the confidence, that my intentions is not emigration. I will get the petition and a testimonial from Ministry of Health of Russian Federation! It is a respected structure and any person working in the field of medicine is under care of the Ministry.
Except of that I will pay for preparation for interview with the commission.
Tell me the name and the code of the airport where you will meet me!
I do not think about our meeting as about risk! Why I should to think so?
Even if we will understand that we are not created to each other, anyway it is a life and I will never regret about my trip to you.
I live and without similar acts the life would become grey and senseless. We can speak for years, but the sense of the first meeting will be the same! Even if we would meet after 10 years of dialogue via the Internet, the first meeting would establish the same questions that you have established now. So why I should be afraid that our relationship will not develop? It is better to have hope in heart and to make courageous acts, than to live all life in uncertainty and fear to make something, and to die not felt the Love or Disappointment!
Every day I think - what my friend Chris will tell me today, what mood he will have today? And as soon as I get free minute, I rush to accounting department to find out if you have written to me or not.
And when I receive your letter, I start to smile from ear to ear anticipating the best time of my day - time when I read your letter and when I write to you the all my thoughts. These are the most important minutes of my day. And these minutes I don't hear anything and I don't see anything except of lines and paragraphs which in my mind will be transformed into small movie, movie about you, my dear Chris.
And you cannot imagine at all how it wonderfully! Sometimes I think, what would be if I have not found the boldness in myself to write you?
What would be if I didn't believe that I can find a man in such a way?
I always want to think that I the courageous woman, but I feel that actually it is not so. I am ready to give my life for the sake of person who are close and dear for me, I am ready to donate my well-being for the sake of well-being of other person but when I think of myself, I often become timid and all my boldness disperses like the fire's smoke.
I am often afraid to make something, to take some step simply because of fear that it will be an incorrect step. I am often afraid to ask people about anything simply because of fear to get the negative answer.
Not always, but it happens. What would happen, if you have not answered my first letter? Nothing would happen! And grey monotonous days again would lie on a way of my life by infinite impenetrable veil.
Do you want to know what I did today? First off, I should tell that I slept with a smile on my face! At least when I have woken up and have looked at the mirror, I have noticed that I smile! Then, I cleaned a teeth and I had smile! Then, I jog and I smiled as if actually I watched funny movie. Then, I have cooked a breakfast and drank a coffee with a smile on my face! Then, I have come to clinic, and I could not hide my smile.
I was ready to laugh and I at all had no desire to work! It is a very bad symptom for the doctor! (Smile). Everything around have seemed to me a beautiful and wonderful. And even the severe boss, when have seen that I look at him and I smile, he began to survey himself attentively and even have come near to the mirror to see if anything wrong! He has thought that something wrong with his clothes! All the day I work with smile on my face! Kristina looks at me and smiles as well. Of course she understands the reason, and it makes her happy as well! And when time of sleep will come, I will lie in my bed with the same smile on my face! And if you till now have not understood why I smile, I will tell you!
I smile because I think of you, Chris! And it brings joy!
I am so happy that I have in my life such a man as you! Thank you that you are in my life! I have to go. Now I will not have a lot of time after work because after work I will have one more working day! (Smile).
You may ask what I mean? The preparation for my trip! You cannot imagine at all how many deals I must do for our meeting! I even have asked the boss to reduce my working day or to allow me to take some hours off in the middle of day to make some things, because after 5 pm not all departments works! Of course now I should work in the days off to have more of free time at week-days. But thoughts about our meeting give me force and energy! I am sure that everything will be perfectly!
I will wait your letter! Please, write me because I need your letters and support more than ever! Your Natalya!