Romance scam letter(s) from Yana Kotukha to Alstro (Canada)
Letter 1
Hello Alstro.
That is iana.
I am sprry for the silence. Of course i want to communicate with you. But i havent had a chance to enter the i-net and look the mail box and the site.
Here i am. I am sorry that you had bad thpights.
No, i am a very open person and if i do nto want to talk, if i do not like something i will for sure tell you. Would you be so kind to tell more about your life, job, free time activities, likes and dislikes) As for me,I am an open book please ask me anything.
I would like to find a kind, caring, loyal, loving future partner as for my likes and dislikes.... you know after what happened in my life during war...i had to change much in my life and get used to the new way of life...but what was left for always is my optimism))) lovefor life has become even stronger after what i have seen.... i like simple open people.... who are not envious of others, who do not gossip and judge people, who are kind and see the life in bright colors and not always gloomy. I like nature so much, like picnincs, like dancing ) like cooking) like clean flat)
As for my dislikes, i hate rude people, those who do not respect elderly people, hate fights and blood.... and to be honest hate the laws in our country, the corruption here...people here will always suffer as nothing is being changed for many years and wont be... and even war and many deaths havent changed anything*((((( why did you stop previous relations?
do you go to bed early or late, and wake up? i hope to hear soon from you and will do all my best to answer as quickly as i can because of job and babysitting. iana
Letter 2
Hello Alstro.
I am sorry...after you wrote here to my e-mail i didnt look the mails on the site.... so, it is great that you wrote so much to me here and so many pics. Thank you so much.
I am glad we can understand each other welland we decided at once to be open.
I am sorry you feltsad after that woman stopped writing to you. May be you didnt move anywhere... may be she didnt see the future with you..
For sure i will be honest with you, willask what i need to knwo and will always be an open book for you.
Isee you went through much with your first wife... drugs is really a serious problem... sorry, i ahvent understood to the full. Is your first wife well now? happy? was she able to have kids?
We cant judge people... life is such a strange thing, it gives us such hard periods... some can cope with them, weaker people cant.... trials can be different.... hope all is fine for that woman now. Alstro, i see your second marriage was hard as well.... sad that people value material things so much.... prefer money to sweet loving relations.... if only they could live through my life when the war started...they would understand that money means nothing when you lose dearets to you people, when you can be shoot every day....
You know, if you are not with those people now...taht means that you are on your right way, you will meet a better person, better people who will share your views with you, your life and likes/.... I am fine here, though every day seems the same for me...In fact that would be good to have a man close to me, a strong shoulder like we tell here.... that would be great to feel myself a weak woman. Yes, i am an optimist, all say a strong girl morally... but you know when i am alone and close to the pillow, i sometimes want to cry as i am tired , exhausted even to struggle and i want someone hug me and was close to support, give his hand...
people are so cruel everywhere, all live for themselves, all are so material((( I do not judge, may be the reason for all this is our country itself, the laws, miserable salaries... corruption... all are rude and angry because of such life (((
My days are the same as i told you. I am with my son all the time, more than that i babysit with anotherkid at the same time and that is always a greta mess here with them...hard for me, but it is the only possible variantfor me now to earn money.... when they sleep in the afternoon, two kids of 7 and 8 years oldcome and i learn Englsih with them, do their homework.... and then again spend time with mine and another kid, go for a walk.... and at 20.00 we are at home with my son and i clean andcook for next day... and wash him and feed and read... so.... hard but i need to do in such a way because the government do not take care here of the refugees form the east of Ukraine and i cant find any job now while my son is little.... so... you now can imagine a bit of my day.... chaos)))) I am looking first of all for a man who is a good person, who has compassion for others. My grandmother always told me that you can tell much about a person's character by how they treat a waiter or waitress when they make a big mistake. I'm looking for a man who has self confidence, who knows what is important in life as opposed to thinking that things will bring him happiness, he should understand that true happiness comes from within, not from outside sources. Then....when the happiness comes from within, other things can be enjoyed even more. We should also have a chemistry together, feel at home around each other as if this is the best place in the universe for us to be.......beside each other.
who is an example for you in your life?
Alstro, oncemore can i ask you... now you can meet your girls without problems? all is well?
and can you imagine now a woman in your life? wont yoube afraid again to be burnt?
Alstro, what questions did you ask?
Letter 3
Hello Alstro) thnak you so much for our pleasant communication.
Here it is getting warmer and warmer as well, but that is great as i do nto like cold and frost and her eit is such a climate that we have 8 months of cold unpleasant weather and only 4 of warm nice one... so i am glad to see the sun and we can walk a lot with Egor.... i have to run so much after him and the other kid i am babysitting with...i then feel so exhausted... but now i cant go to the gym) so this my gym with them) though of course i want to goand look for a good job as soon as Egor can go to kindergarten, i really need this to be able to support him, want to give him all the best... want him to seethe seaside... to see soem ncie places... want him togo to the kids' football section and that is all so expensive that i need to work soon a nd a lot (( Everything is so green and nice on your pics )
Alstro, i am reading sometimes form phone but write from laptop, an old one but i can read and write here )
I understood about that girl... i am surprised her husband could read English. Here people know english but not so many and usually younger ones. I was reading the lines about the man form Iraq and refugees and i really decided to ask if that is still legal to come to Canada... I knowthat is hard to get a visa there.... and i wonder if i can go there... because our country has no the condition of war state, or how to say this.... have you understaood? the war wasnt announced o?
I wish i could leave as here i have onlytwo good friends Julia and kate...they support meas much as they can... help us ...but i cant ask them all the time... i feel i need to move and to try and give my kid education, some life better than here with no lies and corruption everywhere like here..want him to have good best memories are connected with winter at my granny's house...i do nto know why... as now i hate cold and frost, but i very well remember the really severe winters and me staying inside the house and lookign at window which was all in frosty drawings... that was so beautiful like in fairy tale... and the aroma of granny's cooking)) it seems to me that was the only time when i felt the great care about me.... Thank you so much, Alstro, for sharing your memories with me.... i see we have much in common and many common views to lifeand lifestyle)I see you are a person with high moral values... i was taught by my granny how to be a woman, it seems she behaved me on old traditions) so, that doesnt mean that iam at all old-fashioned, no, but i eman what concerns family and respect and attention in family.....i am a one-man woman and i will never betray my choice..will never bring mud in my family or in my bed like we say here.... I like your words somuch that we need to trust people.... her ein Kiev i had already many unpleasant moments too...but i look into the future... i do nto want to think how unhappy i was...i want to attract happiness in my life... i know that there can be some difficulties in mylife...but better not to think of it...i prefer to think of good things and they will then enter my life)))) i totally agree with you.... that our past could influence us but we must live looking for good things and new pleasant feelings in our future... we must open our hearts and accept happiness... we live once and we mustnt waste any chance to be happy...
Alstro, you know i forgot about the age difference while talkign with you... i feel very much interested really...i think the main is to look in the same direction...
I am ukrainian. i speak and write english myself. Alstro, i need to finish already.
how do you like to spend your vacations? do you have once a year or more?
what is your favourite holiday in a year? do you like to get presents or togive? what more?
Letter 4

Hello Alstro
I am glad to hear from you.
Thanks for understanding,and hope youarenot judging me for anything... you know when you go through the war period and loss of people...dearest ones like mum... you can forgive much for the sake of being not lonely... but.... such is my destiny that now i am alone with Egor and we really need a good family.
You are a very kind person, thank you so much for the care. I would be glad if something can be between us, i mean chemistry, some mutual feelings.
I am very much grateful to you for your pleasant words about yourself, i am very much onterested in what you writeand i agree with you that not the place makes the vacation good but the people with whom you are. ...i can understand you very well.
I want to build trustful relations with my partner.
I think trust is the cornerstone of the relationship.
Without openness, acceptance, respect trust you can not have a long lasting relationship. If anyone of these areas breaks down, the
relationship breaks down. So everything in the relationship needs to be done in openness, and in acceptance of
each other and our needs, with complete trust and in honesty.I am a positive person, and I refuse to let negativity control my life. Positive energy brings life; negative energy tears it down, or destroys it.I wish to be surrounded in a positive environment as much as possible!! Negativity is another word for FEAR. I try now to avoid the feelins of scary, fear...even if it is hard now for me , but fear paralyzes people, disables them, hurts them, controls them (if they let it); fear robs from people, causes people to do things they do not want. I now have a son and need to move forward...need to give him life.... and my heart is open for a good man who will accept me with my kid and will be the head of our family. My granny who taught me a lot, mum worked much and i spent much time with granny, so i took some of her wisdom and experince, this is what i meant. she taught me God made man and woman differently. They each have their strengths.....and they each have their weaknesses. But together.....they compensate each other and make each other stronger. The man increases the woman in her areas of strength, and the woman increases the man in his areas of strength. Of course.....this only works when we are talking about a good woman and a good man together. My Grandfather used to say "the man is the head of the family"........but my Grandmother used to say "the woman is the neck of the family, and it is the neck that supports and turns the head". I was taught that the man is the defender of the family......the one who brings in the money necessary for the family......the man rules the things that happen outside the house, and the woman rules the things inside the house. This is not to say that I do not believe women should not be able to have a career if they wish. But it is to say that if the woman does not wish, it should not be a burden on the family. Maybe you think these beliefs too old fashioned?? Well......I must be very open with you and honest. These are my thoughts. If you strongly disagree with them......then you should know here at the beginning. ... I miss having such a family and support..i have noone that is why i am free for big new love to whom i will give all of myslef.... my mum and granny were always so kind and helped everyone...even in the last months of life mum gave all the needed medicines for wounded people, and didnt left anything for herself... she was a real doctor... doctor in her heart...
Thanks God i have my friend Julia here. I cant imagine what i wuld do without her.... she never asks what ineed and never waits till i ask her, she comes, sees my situation, what baby needs and always brings the next day.... i am blessed to have this angel close to me when i lost everyone((((
Alstro, believe me i see the happy moments everywhere.... when today Julia brought strawberry and some turkey meat to us with Egor) isnt that happiness to have such a friend? then some days ago she came and told that her husband presented perfumes to her but she didnt like them and she dicided to offer me, but they are great and i knwo that she likes... but she preffered to make something pleasant for me as knows thta i cant afford.... i am lucky and happy i can tell as good people are around me... i am glad that juicy green grass is everywhere and the sun is on the sky for a long time, the days are so long and light now and the life seems brighter because of that...isnt that great?))) as forme, my favourite holiday is Christmas as well))) i ahve many nice memories about Christmas tree from childhood, the decorations were so special and unusual, i remember grandpa and granny and some nice sweet presents. Before the war they were all with me... some toys, some books and that was so dear to me...but then i lost everything(((i even do nto have pics from childhood. i wish i could go there and took everything back...
In fact back to holidays ,people can always create their own holiday in their family. I have one family, they love each other so much but do nto havekids still(((some problem, and every month on the 29th ther eis a holiday for them, the day of peach family)))) they go somewhere for a day ortwo, if jobs allow and spend together) great really) yes? Alstro, i needto go now to cook soup) I wish you all the best.
That is all so hard to understand those papers.... in fact all is clear but not clear)))) ihave my classmate Kate working in travek agency and helping with, if we once decide i think she will give me a helping hand in this))) what are the plans for the weekend?
I suppose i will go to Julia's dacha as always. She always invites me to spend timewith ehr and her kids,so that we do nto feel lonely with Egor.During weekend i have no job, thatis why she understands that i will be lonely.
Letter 5
Hello Alstro) glad to ahve your messages.
I am sorry, but i hope you remembered that we were at the dacha with Julia and her family. Returned yesterday evening.In weekends we usually go there togetehr with her kids and my son) this is the only place where i can go and have some rest from city and the rented flat((((
There the kids are always outside on the fresh air as lakes and forest are not far....they spend all day outside and that is goo) we make BBQ, we play different games to guess the words by signs and explanations) in the evening they make fire as well, the men can go fishing and we just cook somethnig, can take care about some plants in the garden, play with kids, go to the forest)))) nothing special ... just a total relaxation form the city))) Alstro, i see your parents were very wise people) I am sure they gave you all the best from them) i as well try not to shout at Egor...i try to be calmwith him... to explain if it is possible.... he understands already so much,,, he knows how to amke me smile and be not angry))))he understands what he can do and what he cant already))) thoughgkass vase is interesting for him as well)))
I know that we must enjoy every second of our life, now and and only now.... i know that pretty well. Before the war, i was always nervous about many things, was always in a hurry... i always planned something, was saving money to open the private little school for little kids.... i was trying to work hard... i didnt have much free time, but always planned and studied something... and you see one day all was ruined.... it seems to em that i lost so many years there ((( now i understand this.....i do nto plan anything as i live day by day and enjoy it as much as i can , trying not to see all the hardships i have ))) I am glad it is so easy to talk with you and you can understand me,i amsmiling when you write that i willneed someone to complain on you))))) You know i was behaved in such a way that i never tell anything bad about my close people.... i chose a person, i give him my heart and i will never betray my choice,...noone will hear bad about himeven if we have some quarrels with him. and i am so much flattered with your attention....i love so much how you talk about my child.... that he will be yours.... i understand your worries...but lets talk of good things and attract positive emotions to us))) all will be just fine if we stay open with each other.... if we tell what we wantand need... we are normal people as i understood., we both already suffered form different reasons.... and we want tobe we will make our partners happy as well...
I miss being with a nice tender thoughtful man. I will give him hundreds times more of my love and care and respect.I'd like to die hug kiss my man every moment of the day, I would like to have him near me, always be able to speak with him, joking, laughing. Make my man feel happy and only give him all the love I feel for him, being able to go to sleep with him closely and make him feel protected and loved so much. I would wake up in the morning and kiss him good morning and make nice breakfast for my family)
I would like my man to feel a real man, desired and beloved, respected and waited for, happy and secure safe and quiet.
I want my man to feel that for me there is only him for me ,the only one that I want to love for a lifetime.
I wish I could share with my soulmate the joys and sorrows, disappointments and problems, to make him be sure that we are a winning team and that together we can solve every problem. Alstro, I speak russian,ukrainian)))) but those are many native ones. I speak English fluently and some German too.
I am glad to see the pics) you are active) i would like to make that in the snow)) have never tried))) will you teach me or guide me? I will wait for your news and pics)
by the way noone has recently told me about my beauty and in fact noone has ever done in fact) here i am considered to be not a real beauty it seems)
glad that you like me)
Letter 6
Hello Alstro)
Thank you for understanding,for being patient with me )
YOu are right the kids of two can surely understand you, and do what you tell them to do. My son Egor can tell just separate words clearly , and some very bad but i understand him very well) Alstro, i am smiling now about the cake ))))
So,i need always to tell my thoughts and desires clearly to you, sothat you can understand well, no hints, yes?
i agree and that is always easy to do in such a way) Alstro, you are a very kind and understanding person, that is great really. You are a nice daddy for sure. My son is so young that of course he will call my man , my husband as his dad... especially that he has never known his biological father... oh, how i want, relaly dream and pray about having a good man who willlove my son and care for us and educate him to grow a real man... give him good moral values, what is good and what is bad.... that is my everlasting dream, no new clothes, jewellery, money, .... but a good family where my son will feel comfortable ... Alstro, thnak you so much for the compliments...i understand that i forgot how to be a woman and you show me and remond me of this ))), it is a pleasure for me to open my e-mail box and see your message) really) it is so unusual for me) i do nto knwo what will be in future, but your attention, your words are important for me ) that distracts me from everyday routine) No) of course my days are nit boring, vice a verse))) but you know our communication brings pleasant emotions to me) and even gives hope for something more )))
I hope you are well now! hope your days are nice and youchave success in everything, such are my wishes for you) May be i am too open always with you, may be i am too quick in telling you all this but i really want we know each other well. I want a family. in Ukraine families are very important and a very big part of our life. I hope you feel we are making very good friends in our emails and then maybe you can feel you would like to meet me and if you like me maybe have a date for dinner))))
I am looking for a nice kind man to be close to me and spend the rest of my life with. to have someone to cook for and make someone's days pleasant and full of love and joy)
Do you believe in destiny? Here we say that summer is some little life always,new life))) i hope this summer will as well bring changes into mine) my and Egor's)
Well, I do believe a little in this but I think we do make our own good luck as well, we need to sow the seed in life and then the oak trees will grow. And so, now i amm sowing the seed into our communication, our relationships if we can call that this way)))) i hope good tree will grow soon)))) My days are the same as always. the same time-table for me with Egor and the kid i am babysitting with)
But soon that will change a bit, as while they are sleeping in the afternoon, i always have pupils ...and here the school year is coming to its end and soon i wont have pupils((( so, from one side i will have some 2 hours for myself... will be able to cook,clean something iron.... as usually i do that late at night and then inthe morning hard to wake up) but form the other side that is not really good for me, as i will lose my earnings then and that is so imporatnt for me (((( so, may be i will try to look for some other jobs...i cant imagine what that can be.... sitting at home and having just two hours for this((( but need already to think of that... Thank you for the pics, i will always be interested in them. here is ee nothing except the rented flat and the street around my house where we go for a all is interesting to me )
i need to go and work now.
Letter 7
Hello Alstro) it is always a smile on my face when i start reading your letter)
I am fine, just the night was hard. Egor didnt breathe well, nose was blocked in some way, in the morning i sawsome rash, so we woke up early and went to pass some analyses. The results will be in three days, they say some blossoms now influenced him((( do not know for sure what...

i am waiitng for guests now) in fact , wait for the owner of the flat now, he needs to come and fix the washine machine(((without it with little kid it is hard))) Alstro, you are a very nice person, man, friends for me now... Just do nto try to do your best,just stay yourself.... and all will be fine if we continue in such a way. I do not need a perfect person, ideal man as then i wont suit him at all))))
I like talking to you, you are a very nice man. I am not trying to be anything, but myself, I am not the kind of woman that says things I do not mean, it is the real me,
I think it is essential to be honest to oneself, to be it also to others, I have seen people living on a lie and it will at some point get back to them and the consequences are very severe, that is not the way I would like to live, and knowing that some people turn their back on me because I will not help them with lying, I?d rather live and have fun than having to remember what to tell this and that person, the world is cruel, but we can do something ourselves, I do know it is not easy, but it is possible, because in the end it all comes back to us again, and I usually am in a very good mood and when I meet people I smile and greet them, some is looking to see if I am crazy, and others greet again and smile, and their day might be better because of that. I believe that, from our previous conversations, we have a great deal in common, and that is necessary for the basis of a solid relationship. I want to show you how much I respect you and understand you, i know thre are differences in cultures, which means there will be misunderstandings from time to time, as can be found in all relationships. But I am a firm believer that all obstacles can be overcome, and I feel very strongly that, if a person is confused or does not understand something, then they need to ask! To keep the misunderstanding inside only leads to worse problems, because it gets larger and larger with time.
I like your sense of humour)
I will send more pics toyou. do you have viber or whatsapp, it will be easier then.
Letter 8
Hello Alstro, i am here and as always glad to hear from you.
I am a bit busy now, as the owner of the flat needs to come for the payment.....
Alstro, hope all is fine for you and soon you will write )
I agree that in fact all people have hearts and souls and the main culture for everyone is to stay a person...a good person is good in every country and the sameis with the bad one) my number is 380954020561
i willw ait for your news,
Letter 9
Hello Alstro) I decided to write here to you.
Sorry about your job situation. of course that is not good for you,better that thye pay you for every hour you spend not only driving but waiting as well if that is their fault.... We didnt go to the dacha as it was planned as Julia's brother has come with his pregnant wife and their son and they went with them. There was no more place in the car...I understand that it is her family and thye ahd to take them as i am always with them , every weekend. Julia was sorry...apologized, but i understand her.... I am not offended, just feel very much sad that we are lonely here with Egor, just we two... will sit at home and just go outside...some sad mood now for me, sorry(((
I just feel loneliness...of course i have my little angel who adores me, but i want a full family for him and i meself want to be a woman, want to feel needed, cared for...
I believe that life is lived from the inside out, who we are, and who we want to be, is what we are inside. You want to know me right??? Always what is inside of us is what is expressed outwardly, on the outside. I share with you, what comes from within me. I open my heart, even in my letters, so that you can see into my soul, the person who I am, and who I want to be. I share with you, something from my Heart. Sometimes I write things down, my thoughts, feelings, dreams, emotions, passions. Relationships, good relationships, are not based on hobbies and interests, it is only mutual love that a relationship needs to survive. If the love stops flowing, so does the relationship. We must always choose love; it is the most excellent way!! If the relationship is good, then the hobbies and interests work themselves out :). I share with you from my mind, because you need to know me, who I am inside. It is important you know who I am :). If you desire to know who I am, then you will be able to not only read my words, but feel them. As you read, open your heart, let go of all fear, and they will come alive to you, it will whisper the truth to your soul, you have only to become still and quiet, and you will hear it's voice, it is a voice of gentleness, love, and compassion.
Alstro, i am dreaming of happiness and to meet a man who will care of us with Egor...
tell me if we are those people whom you would like to know more and see close to you.
Letter 10
Hello Alstro, hello dear man...
it is such a happiness when i have news from you... you are so wise, so kind, tender...thoughtful...
Alstro, i am reading your words and it seems i know you so long already) it seems you are like reading many of my thoughts... i feel we have so much in common)))feelthat you are just a man with whom we will look in the same direction...
I see we think the same. I agree with you that people sometimes cant really understand what love is)) they are attracted by outer beautybut forget that the most important is inner...outer will fade with years but the soul will never... i am glad that we are on the same level with you))) even if you are far away at the moment I feel you close to me .. You're the one that conquered my heart and I will do everything possible to make you happy always. Want to be able to take care of you, I want to be able to make your life bright and happy, days sweet and pleasant always, want to be able to give you all my love and together we will build our love nest, our nest where we will be happy together, where every problem we will solve together, where I make you coffee in the morning and kiss you good morning, and evening) kiss you- good night and hug for you to sleep quiet and make you feel loved, I want to spend every free moment with you walking hand in hand, joke, laugh with you and go out to eat together and be happy being always together. Alstro, i would be really glad to visit you and see everything there... i need to understand how i can live there, how communicate)))) yes, that would be great if we could come to pay a visit to you ))
Alstro, i can imagine how many refugees you have there and i saw on tv news that those peopel , refugees form the east they cause many problems in every country.... here there are such people as well.... some are relaly aggressive and want to make their own laws here, rules.
When i go to you, all my past will be in the past. I want to bring to you my open heart and soul) want you never see sadness in my eyes) i will always make you smile)
Alstro,i wish all would work for us) Alstro) thnak you so much for the compliments to me) in fact i do nto consider myslef to be so much of what you say)) but just an attractive in some way, and think my inner world is even better))))
please write soon)
Letter 11
Hello Alstro)
I am here and as always happy to read form you) to see how thoughtful you are and eager to see me))))
Alstro, have i told you about Kate, my ex-classmate and who is as wellher ein Kiev and she owns already a tourist agency. Earlier she worked in embassy, and now she opened her travel agency. I am sure she can relaly help me if i ask, wesee each other every second week, meet with kids though her son is already 8, but we are good friends, me,Julia and Kate)
she is keen on all those questions. I will phone her and ask what si the best variant for me and Egor to visit you)
and for how long do you wantus there? i need to know exactly) Of course if we succeed in coming to you, i wont disturb you) thank you for your being so hospitable )))
Iwould be very much ahppy to see where you live and all around) i do nto know if we can leave to USA for soem days asi suppose that wont be allowed for me, because i will get the canadian visa only... but i will try to learn all details form Kate. In summer i have no pupils already what is vbad for me because less earnings and my babysitting job will have break as well because they will go to vsiit their relatives and soem seaside... so for sure i will have break. i will learn when too. and what si the bets dates for you when we can come.
I hopeto hear soon fromyou and then will contact Kate) i am so much excited already, I hope our dreams and wishes can relaly become true)
hugs to you,
Letter 12
Hello Alstro) hello dear man)
thank you for making my days better, happier) your news always bring smile and pleasant emotions to me....
You know my mum has always told me that i am so naiive and trust in people so easily) i really do) and now i believe in you, in all your words... i think and say to myself) this man cant be bad) he is honest and he relaly shows and expresses his true feelings and emotions) i am not afraid to be mistaken really though i am not young already) i want to believe in people, i want to trust, want to believe that i can be happy ) and you are that man who can help me with creating family and good relations) i want to give us a chance, as we live once and the life is not endless....
I have good imagination) and i can easily imagine us together)
the dreams are so bright for me )))) at leats in my dreams i can smile and forget about everyday hardships)))
Alstro, strange when two persons understand each otherso well, feel each other but they were born so fra from each other... why is this so??? is that some trial for people? do we need to overcome all hardships and time and distance and in such a way prove the real desire and feelings? are you ready for this? will you do that for me and my son?
Kate told me, that to go to Canada first i need of course to make a passport for Egor, and then to go for visa. she will help me to write a paper that i am her worker and that my salary allows me to travel, she will help me as much as possible, she knows what to do... she is my ex classmate and a good friend and she wants me to find happiness at once and to live in love and peace.
Alstro, thank you as well for giving me hopes for happy future.
Alstro, passport can be made for 20 days,that will cost 70 dollars, then two visas will be abpout 240 dollars, the rest Kate will make for free for me of course)
is that all right for you?
Kate says that we will apply for 60 days stay...but they can give 30 only or even less, and in fact then we will ourselves decide if i can stay 10 days or 2 weeks or how long you like so that we do notbother you)
you are a very ncie man, i feel really at ease with you. I thnak you for no pressure, i thnak you for being a real gentleman i hope there will appear chemistry for us, between us) I need to go now to iron clothes for egorand myself while he is sleeping. It seems the iron is so heavy, the end of the month is always stressful for me and all seems to be grey((( only your news bring smile to me )))
I hug you and wait for your news. and i am so much thankful to you for the pleasant wordsto me )
Letter 13
Hello Alstro)
I need to apologize that didnt have tome to open my e-mail and contact you here.
The days were so hard for me physically and even more morally....
I had to look for some additional jobs which i can do being at home with Egor... The school year has finished and the pupils have vacations, so i do not have pupils now who come and i give lessons to them at home... and that is not good for me, that is why i was looking on the i-net may be to do some translations, to write some advertisements, but there are so many fake ones there.... i started making some job, translating for them, but in the end they didnt send payment to me and i spent so much time and didnt sleep till late((( very sad(((( in my situation that is such a stress for me really(((
That is why i need to apologize for not writing here... you know i want to write some positive nice things, some romance but in my life now there is no romance and excitement right now.... so i didnt want to burden you with my sad stories....
I have always loved summer) and warm weather and the sun and lakes and rivers, but now this gives me stress as i have no jobs and i need to struggle with this....
Please, do nto be offended that i was silent....
If i were alone in this life, i would cope and would work, but with Egor i cant go to have a fulltime job as he is still little and from the other side i need to be responsible for him, to give him roof, to feed him with good things, vitamins for his growth, to buy clothes for him.
I know i need to be patient and optimistic and in some months i can have a full time job when he goes to kindergarten. This hard period will surely pass and i will again be able to have butterflies in my stomach) to dream about romance and my new relations))))
i want that really) I know myself and i know i can make a good man happy close to me ) and he will be filled with joy and love form our communication and he will smile always from happiness) if you want,please be patient with me ) Alstro,and Egor's allergy for some plants is irritation, we need to pass more and more analyses and then to find out and then to have treatment...
But in the end i believe all will be fine ) yes?))))
Alstro, i wish i could gather my and egor's things and come to you. But at first the passport... if you atsill eager to see us? dearets, youneed to understand that i cant afford to pay for that. I asked my frind Kate, the passport will be now to m ake it sooner 80 dollars, then two visas will be about 300 dollars if we relaly want them to be made not for 2 weeks.....
will we make all this? How are your days?)
I hope i havent lost your interest? how not any other woman has stolen you)))
I will wait for your news.
Letter 14
Alstro, i read anpother letter form you?
So, did you see daughters and parents? how was everything? i hope no problems with ex?
Dearest, i can understand what stress she can give you...but just think of your little angels... do not pay attention to all the provocations) just smile and wish her all good... and pay attention more to kids.

Alstro, dearets, Alstro, i want to support you as well. I see we both have some stress and we both need care and support... i want us to meet and become close and i am sure we will ahve good understanding between us...
I like you a lot, you are a very kind sweet man.
I just very much hope that you can find this money for our meeting. The first is passport for Egor and the visas and then later the tickets when all is ready.
Pleasebe strong always and write soon to me, my dearets Alstro.
Your iana
Letter 15
Hello dearest Alstro) i am happy to read your news here and messages and the pic was nice really)
How are your hands?
I see you made all your angels pleased) what a greta daddy you are)
I wish i had such one in my life who caredfor me and made presents...but minewas quite different, and left us ((( and never did anything for us...when i was about 30 he appeared in my life and started to ask for money)))) i gave , then again and then again.... i thouight that all the same itis myduty to support him.... but then he took money and disappeared, he drank, then again phoned to ask and disappeared. I offered to stop drinking, offered medical help...but no... when i refuysed to give money but offered to buy some food, clothes... he refused and again disappeared.
so.... i see you are a wonderful daddy. I wish my son had such one too))))
I now think we have much in common, may be those are loud words, may be we still do nto know each other well, but that is how i feel, that is what i think and see from your words...
I feel at ease with you, feel nice talking with you, feel joy when read your news, feel that you are a man who can really be thoughtful, attentive to us, who can make us happy.
I am glad you want to accept my son Egor) you would like him for sure as he is such a nice funny boy) He has never known his father and wont ever, so i want he grows close to a nice man like you.
You see you as well agree with me that nowadays people do nto behave the way they must do... all think that is normal to change partners, not to look for serious relations and responsibility....i am as well old fashioned and my granny taught nme quite different things and morals.... so. i want to be with one man, want to be his only woman, want to please him, want to surprise him and feel his loveand passion, wantto share flat and kitchen with him, bathroom and never look at others,want to have this total trust in him... that is so important in relations... your heart will always be calm and happy if there is trust between partners... Alstro, i wantto marry that man who can understand me without words, who can know and feel my pain even if i do not show that and tell... who will always be close to me even if he is far.... who can really become father to Egor, i will see that... with whom i can have butterflies again in my stomach, who will return me to the state of real woman)
Alstro, i hope you can do that) yes?)
we can see each other in viber and whatsapp, there is video chat there too)
Alstro, i am glad you ant us to come and can help us with this as alone i wontbe able to do that.
will we really start this?
i will wait for your news and send my hugsto you,
Letter 16
Hello Alstro, hello dearest.
I thnak you so much for talking with me. I like that you can listen to me, read my words, and you can answer in such a simple are just the person for me, and i am the person for you) i feel that. I know you more and more and i am glad you share the most important from your life. I will always support you and togethr we will cope with everything, no problems will appear in future. Alstro, you make me happy and not upset, i am nto extravagant and we will togetehr support our family and will grow into a nice couple, Egor needs such a craing loving dad like you, and you are such i feel that) Oh, ididnt know it was Father's day there, my congratulations to you) and thank you for the great pics) how are the girls? Alstro, we were at Julia's dacha, the weather was nice really and we had nice weekend and picnic and grilled meat and vegetable and Egor swam a bit though he doesnt like as many young kids) I have some news ,not bad and not good, just that is needed for me to go to my native town to remake some documents, and as well try to sell mum's flat there... in fact to prepare everythingfor thta,and to make an advertisement. that must be done and now when Egor is not so little i need to go, though it is so long and exhausting((((
But i need.
I will start already tomorrow, i wont be able to write to you. I will need one and a half day to go there, the same back and i think 2-3 days there.... Frankly speaking i do nto like that myself, but i know that must be done earlier or later ((((
I hope you can be patient and wish me good luck and will wait till i return and we can continue our communication, i wont be able to write e-mails for sure but i hope i will have viber and whatsapp working. Alstro, i still havent decided what to prepare for Egor's b-day, where and how. i looked at some palces where we can organize nice picnic for him and other kids and for my best friends girls, but all the same that is all so expensive ((( the kids will need some animators, food and drinks and Egor will need a cake, some baloons.... and i as well will need to organize some food and drinks for Julia, Kate and Lyuda, those are my girlfriends whose kids will be present. I think may be at all not to celebrate... of course here it is a tradition, but i think all will understand me, though i wish i could make a holiday for my one and the only ) Dearest, i will write to you in viber or whatsapp, for sure will warn you about everything ) i will wait for your news,too
hig you, iana
Letter 17
Hello dear Alstro, my love, here i am...
I hope all is fine for you, hope you are healthy and as always positive and smiling now when see my letter.
I returned,we returned... that was really so hard.... the trip itself as on the bus it is long, uncomfortable and hotand with Egor it all doubles...even worse....
Then there the life is so grey... people are so strange and angry.... the laws are so crazy there.... it was so long to remake the documents from mum on me.... the long hours of waitings, money and again money...people do not have money there and of course they want... and they take for every paper.... that was scary at nights as it was heard some guns, though far but all the same that all reminded me about 2014 and all what i saw and experienced..... i cried...
I made the advertisement to sell the flat, but that was not so easy... bad that i will have to go there then again...
the place, the flat are so dear to me, but i understood that i wont be able to live there... my son mustnt see all that and he must have a better future....i will do all my best to give him all i can, to see him a happy person..i want hime to have anice childhood)
On the 22nd he is having his b-day, i understand that he can understand little, but all the same i want to make some holiday for him with Julia and her kids....
I feel now bad, caught a cold, coughing badly...but hope will feel better and will organize the holiday)
I wish i had a man close to us who could now care for us, would be our family, our happiness)))) you))))
i need to finish as i feel nto well and still need much to do.
your iana
Letter 18
Hello my dearest Alstro)
I need to thank you for being so patient with me, for understanding me... for taking care of me and Egor.
Thank you so much for your support. Donot be sad that i do nto write often, the days were really busy for me, and except the illness and party my head isso busy with the question of job... Summer is here and i have no job at all. The private lessons have finished, all kids are on vacations. I do not do babysitting now as they left as well for vacations to the seaside....
i am looking now for new ones, may be some kids to go for a walk with while parents are working, but people do not agree because i have my baby.... now... i cant give Egor to kindergarten as they say come in September only and in fact they take from 2,6.... that is why it is such a hard situation for me now((( I hope that may be the flat can be sold in Luhansk but still no news at all((((( as for the b-day party, there were Julia with her husband and their three kids,Kate with her son and one more girl Luda with her husband, they are friends of Julia's family. I didnt send pics of all them, as i think you do not need them) Dearest, i feel much better now, though still cough and and have a running nose and have already some pain in nose after cleaning it all the time..... i hope in a couple of days all will pass.
Dearest Alstro, i see we havent communicated often as it was earlier.... but i really felt badly , as i alrfeady explained to you.
Alstro,dearest, do nto think that i have lost i am just thinking all the time about everything what is waiting for me.... what for i will feed Egor till i find the job? how will i pay the rent and bills? i wish i could start some job so soon....
Alstro, as for the visa.... you know that iam not keen on that at all as except Turkey where i didnt need visa at all i ahvent been anywhere... and i am afraid that iam form the occupied territory, so there can be so many questions and hardships. So, as my friend Kate told, for me it willbe better to come to an agency , explain what i need and they will organize everything, and then we can be sure that i can go to you, as if i do myself everything wewont be sure in anything at all.... i will receive the refusal and that is all. Alstro, is tnhat the link form the accident on the road you saw? that is really terrible(((( as for shows) i like everythnig)))) i havent been anywhere for some 4 years already ))) so for me everything would be great really)))
late night swim would be great))))) i agree)
Paintball))) that is a dream for me )))) i saw how kids did that and i wanted myself to try))))
thank you for sending to me all those links) everythnig looks so great and unusual for me.... i have never been to such places and that is a real dream for me ))))) i wish we could go together))) i like you always remember that Egor will be with me )))
Alstro, i need now to finish, egor has woken up, he will need me to stay close to him for some time nowto wake up tillthe end)))) i will need to feed him, then we will go outside. when will we call?
write to me your time, which is best for you. hug you,
Letter 19

Hello Alstro.
I am here and glad to have your news....
i understand that you were tired,i thought you would contact to tell me the best time for you.
So, you like relaly cards as i see.... arent you scared? can you always say stop to yourself. I just ask as here i knew some people who really liked crads and poker and then had so many problems because ofthis... many debts and so on..... you asked about the flatin Luhansk? oh...there it isvery cheap because it is a war zone there....if earlier it was 35 thousand dollars , now it is 10... andmay be even less......((((( and you never know if somone buys it(((( i had to do that earlier(((( but....
today the day is not so n ice. the owner of the flat which i rent came, saw some things egor has caused to the furniture and walls and was shocked.... i understand him of course, understand it is my fault... and i will have to fix that all(((((( ihave avery bad mood relaly....except alli have to deal with here...nowthe owner will wait and check till i fix that all .... Thank you, dearest, youare so sweet, Alstro, you seem to be the best man for write just what i wantto read...or you just feel me so much....
if we can talk with you for example at about 17 here will that be ok, how much will that be for you? tell me if that is all right for you.... Alstro, i told you that i have tweo best friends here Julia and Kate. Kate owns her travel agency, and she deals with embassies, and all the agencies which help with visas and all those things....she knows everythnig so well... of course she will help me, i donto worry if i do that with her help..
she just says that if to do that we must start earlier,first to make passport for Egor....
T0m,need to finish.Fell sad baout allt he problems with the flat.....need to search the i-net to look for the cheapest prices to fix that all....
Letter 20
Alstro, here i am in the e-mail...
I am afraid you are offended or what?
please explain to me.....
Dearets Alstro, i really want you to understand me and accept my situation here now.... i am so stressed about Egor's health... this rash which doesnt disappear... i feel nervous and angry that 6 doctors here didnt do anything.... it itches for him at night and he sleeps badly and of course me too.... and nothong helps at all...they say wait and wait, diet, this or that... i paid for everty visit to every dopctor, changed many medicines already and nothing(((( i feel so stressed about tis situation relaly and i feel Julia is tired of em too as always i need her help, advise and so on and so forth...
Alstro, i feel yuo are offended that i am not so much attentive right now... please, try to understand jobs now and i do nto look now for babysitting as noone will leave thier kid with mone after seeing his rash.... i feel relaly sad even more when understand youi are silentand do nto want to talk much((((
Alstro, can we be on the same page? can we try? Alstro, i want to meet you. I will take egor's passport soon and we can meet.... do you still want this?
Have you had a chance to communicate with girls?
i hug you and really hope to have your answer.
Letter 21
Hello Dearest, hello my Alstro) Dear, thnak you so much for your support,for giving me hopes for nice future together with you, for understanding...
My past was hard in all the senses of this relations, with life...with war and loss of the family... being a lonely mum in another city where you have nothing and noone to help is really hard and i want so much to have a strong caring man close to you, i want to be happy and feel that i am not lonely in this cruel world. Alstro, and when Egor is ill and you cant help it is a great depression forme.... i am sorry if i was nto enough attentive to you.... Dearest, you are a very good person and i want Egor has such an example of a man in front of him, see how you behave yourself with mum, wife..with other people..... i know you can teach him much really...that is great...and i dream this new life can start soon for us...
You know i want really to feel your care... i havent never had that form a man, except in childhood form dad... i have never felt myself a real woman in relationships ... as always evetythnig was on me, and i worked and cleaned and cooked and solved problems and looked for the best variants to earn,to live..... i want to become a woman,may be at the age of 35 i can feel that at last)))) Egor still has this rash...i already consulted many doctors and always paid here and there and they do not tell nothing excat, i spent much on different pills, drops, creams... his stomach is better, lighter already but legs and knees and hands are so bad and after wlaking outside it is even worse and under the sun..... but i cant stay at home with him all the time, he needs fresh air and some running and communicating with other people..... I understand how much you miss your girls.... i can imagine.... i would feel terrible relaly if i cant see or hear Egor... Alstro, s youstill waitforus and want to see us) i amso happy about that) really)
write when you can.
Letter 22
Hello Dearest, hello my Alstro) Dear, thnak you so much for your support,for giving me hopes for nice future together with you, for understanding...
My past was hard in all the senses of this relations, with life...with war and loss of the family... being a lonely mum in another city where you have nothing and noone to help is really hard and i want so much to have a strong caring man close to you, i want to be happy and feel that i am not lonely in this cruel world. Alstro, and when Egor is ill and you cant help it is a great depression forme.... i am sorry if i was nto enough attentive to you.... Dearest, you are a very good person and i want Egor has such an example of a man in front of him, see how you behave yourself with mum, wife..with other people..... i know you can teach him much really...that is great...and i dream this new life can start soon for us...
You know i want really to feel your care... i havent never had that form a man, except in childhood form dad... i have never felt myself a real woman in relationships ... as always evetythnig was on me, and i worked and cleaned and cooked and solved problems and looked for the best variants to earn,to live..... i want to become a woman,may be at the age of 35 i can feel that at last)))) Egor still has this rash...i already consulted many doctors and always paid here and there and they do not tell nothing excat, i spent much on different pills, drops, creams... his stomach is better, lighter already but legs and knees and hands are so bad and after wlaking outside it is even worse and under the sun..... but i cant stay at home with him all the time, he needs fresh air and some running and communicating with other people..... I understand how much you miss your girls.... i can imagine.... i would feel terrible relaly if i cant see or hear Egor... Alstro, s youstill waitforus and want to see us) i amso happy about that) really)
write when you can.
Letter 23
Dearest... i am glad you are going to see girls) will you go? know already?
Here it is rainign cats and dogs again((((
feel so sad((( lonely...
Sorry i am short, but i was trying to look for jobs and then cleaning...and egor has already woken up and needs me attention..
i hug you, hope to hear from you and your plans for weekend...
Letter 24
Hello sweetheart, hello dearest.
Here i am )
So, you didnt have a chance to see girls?(((
Thank you for the message here and in viber) iam always happy to have your news)
So) you have all the set?)))) i suppose it is great) i saw in pic) i want such as well))) The weather is better now))) too hot now)))) impossible to be outside from 11 till 17..... very hot) want to go to swim to some lake or Dnieper but Egor still has allregy, not so hard as it was but still has, especially on legs and hands((( Congratulations to you) i mean the car)) and care for parents as well))) Alstro, i am looking for a job all the time... but what can i do now when i am all the time with Egor.... i need to have some job to do at home... when he sleeps or plays.... butfor now nothing..... summer is a dead season for this i think((( i feel musefl so miserable.... when you need something and cant afford... when you need to count every is hard.... really.... very stressful((((
Alstro, i am myself waiting so much till Egor is healthy, till there is a place in the kindergarten and he can go.... and i will be able to start working.... i am dreaming of this.... as... oh...i even do not want to describe what a situation it is((((( Dearest, thnak you for being with me ..i really appreciate that)
i will wait for your news.
Letter 25
Hi Sweetie I finally made it home and I thought I would send a quick note before I went to bed. I have been in Windsor for the week and I came home to feed my fish and make sure I still knew the way. I have been playing cards a lot lately and I did well tonight and last night. I did poorly the night before and had a bad end to the month so I only finished even for the month. I did win a jackpot for $2200 which made my month OK, but I still wish it was better. August has started well and I am up $1900 for the first 2 days. I know I can’t keep this rate all the time but I hope I can keep it better than last month. How are things for you and Egor? I know you are stressed because you need to move and I understand. I don’t have much but I will try to send a little to you this week to help a bit. Do you still want to ask for a Visa to visit me? If you do, when will you be able to apply for one? I know it will take a lot to get a Visa for you and Egor so the sooner we can apply, the better it will be. I am not sure what I will be doing this weekend. I don’t have any plans yet and I don’t think anything exciting is happening. I will probably work a bit and visit my parents. What are your plans for the weekend? I am tired so I am going to go to bed but write me when you have time. I enjoy reading your letters and hearing about your day. Hello dearest Alstro) i am so happy to read form you everywhere and to have your news every day...
I feel happy when read form you.
Alstro, thnak you for understanding... i relaly feel nervous about this move, about all the searches of flats....
From one side i want to find a place close to Julia, in this same region as then i wont feelso lonely... and she can always visit uswith kids and i go to them and we walk togetehr, and she can help me at any time, form the other side it is more expensive here.... and i feelsad.... and i need to decide so soon as Julia is leaving for vacations on the 10th and she wont be able to help me to pack things and move them or stay with Egor.... so i feel so stressed. I wake up at night and think and think...what to do, what to choose, where to go, where toborrow money,what to sell to have money ((((( i feel relaly so stressed that in the morning feel angry and sleepy and sometimes i can be not attentive to Egor, i then feel ashamed and kiss him... he wants my attention and i feel so nervous ((((
and with jobs nothig at all as it is the season of holidays and vacations, a relaly dead season... all irritate sme so much....
Yesterday wewatched one flat, it is smallbut clean and tidy and not far form Julia, buty again as i needto pay at once for 2 months that is much and they need to know the answer till monday(((( i feel really so hard(((
Alstro, i cant all the time ask you... but if you can allow this.... i would be really so much thnakful to you, my kind generous man.... as for visa, of course i want to apply))) and i am sure till the end of August when all is calm and no stress i will be able to sit and just wait for it to be ready)))) and do you want to seeme ?)) us?))) Dearest, i have no plans for the weekend, excpet packing things part by part and searching for more flats and walkign with Egor((((('
ihugyou, my dear .
willw ait for your news.
Letter 26
Hello Dearest Alstro, my sweetheart, my angel.
Thank you so much for your help. Here it is so expensive in this region, but i am afraid to move from my friend Julia as even to go to the dentist i can ask her or her kids to help, but if i move far then it can be a problem for me.... the bad thing is that everywhere i need to pay for two months at once and the commision for an agent who helps to search the flats and fix the date and time for watching the flat.... so, i still lack some money (((( thought to borrow form Julia but they are leaving for vacations with kids, so i suppose they will need now as well(((
andEgor grows so fast...and needs much now ((((( hard to be alone,but i feel your support and i feel much easier now))))
Alstro, dear, i always wish you success and good luck, you help us and success comes to you always ) thank you , dearest. Here itis so hot as well, +38C.... very exhausting...
the conditioner at home doesnt work ...and from that it is even harder.... Alstro, as for Egor's rash... earlier it was on all his stomack and it is on his back and legs below(((( and now drops and creams help(((( i learned about one doctor..but again i cant now afford to go to him as the visit is not free and then the new medicines.... i understand health is the most important but to be without the roof over head is as well not nice for a young kid.....
He was 2 in June and he at first will go to kindergarten, i think when he is 2 and a half....
now i feel hard as not jobs for me(((( dead season with lessons and babysitting now....
So, every day now i search for flats, i play with him, cook, iron, walk with him in the evening as long as possible.... read books for him, try to develop him in all aspects... last weekend was nothing special, just more walk with Julia, and i packed some not needed things, so that when to move i can do everything quicker.
I dream about river or lake or swimming pool)))) can only imagine how nice that could be to rent a house somewhere close to lake ))) Dearest, thank you so much for everything... hpe your day, yourWednesday will be nice in allaspects)
i hug you, kiss you,
iana PS: as for video talk. Lets do tomorrow for example at 16 here, for you it is morniong, is that all right?
Letter 27
Dearest Alstro. What are you busy with now?
I had such a hard day, in fact morning)))
i thought i would needtomove, packed almost everyhthing...then the owner came and told that he needs urgently to go and help his kids somehwere far away and that i can stay in this flat for more two months but need to pay for them)))) so, i paid and he left, so now i do not need to hire a car, to move, to get used to new flat and surroundings))) nice that i could pay thnaksto you.
I feel now better relaly.
Egor's passport is ready....
You see i have many good news now, thnak you Alstro, thta is because you send me good wishes)))) Alstro, sorry i didnt call when we fixed. I was packing everything here and just mixed everything, the time, dates....
when will you be able?
i hug you and thank you for everything, dearest,
Letter 28
Hello Dearest Alstro, once more thnak you so much for your meesages, letters, pics, pleasant words)))
You are such a sweet kind man))) you are wonderful person)
Iam glad you are such, i am happy to be able to have this chance in life to meet such a man likeyou who is attentive, generous, kind and thoughtful, what is relaly needed to me when i am here aloen...i want to build a strong family , want to see Egor grows in a fullfamily and with you it would be an ideal variant))) I am glad you had a good time) so i see i will have everything needed to cook for us ))))) great really)))
I wish you good luck to go to dentist. Frankly speakingi myself need to visit one, but still have no time and finances for that...these doctors are the most expensive here) is that the same there for you?> Egor is all right, his rash is still on his legs and as well on his back. In all the rest palces it disappeared.... but we still take drops and apply creams .... i suppose those are the plants which are here all around, seasonal plants(((( Alstro,dearest, as you remember my friend Kate owns a tourist agency.And she works with many countries and embassies and she knows how it works. For tourist visa we need our passports, pics, bank account and to fill in the form, i saw it, it is in Russian. You give all this to special agency, pay 95$ for their help, then 145 for consular and service fee. They say it can take about three weeks to organize everything. Is that all right? are you ready for this?
Egor will wake up soon and we will go to have hima planned injection. are you home this evening?
i hug you.
Letter 29
Hello dearest, hello sweetheart)
I am glad that all is well for you and no problems with teeth) and i have three cavities((( already feel them(((( Alstro, we are all not ideal, but i do not need an ideal man for sure. I need a caring kind man like you are, i wantto be with a responsible honest man, like you... we do not know what life prepared for us but i as well want to meet you, to get closer to you... andi believe all will be fine ) we are still communicating, i havent been with a such a thoughtful man at all,and i feel now a real woman and i am happy, you made me smile and feel better among all my hardships. So, i believe you are the manwith whom i can build relations.... i feel at ease with you,no stress, you are not so much demanding, you understand everything...and i am so much thankful to you for this. I like you a lot really. Alstro, i am ready to tell you everything of course. Alstro, when the person is not alive anymore, of course it is not good to tell bad things about him, i mean Egor's father.... short i will tell you that he had such traits of his character like laziness.... he was always unpleased with everything, life, people, job.... he preferred to stay at home and watch TVor go to play football instead of looking for a job.... i was so young as i think that i always thought that he was right... i never demanded anything form him... i forgave hiom and tried to understood.... and didnt see many bad things.... he used me..i worked on three jobs, triedto developmyself, and was always in time to cook, to clean, go buy food as he never had time and money for that.... when the war started he supported russia and i think saw the best variant for him like to go somewhere to fight or i do nto know.....
I then left to Kiev after the death of granny and mum...then he appeared and asked to come to meet him on some neutral side...i went and again tried to forgive him and got pregnant from the first time and then he left, disappeared... i returned to Kiev, learned in a mon th that was pregnant,and couldnt find him anywhere..then in January learned that he was killed..... so..... such is the story....
It seems to me i tol aboutmum who workedin hospital and how she gave the medicines to others and then was left herself without ones...and i couldnt find anywhere at that hard period and lost her (((( and then for always moved to Kiev to Julia at first. Noone called about the flat((( but may be you are right that it will be helpful to me ))) to us) Alstro, i will learn about the tickets. It seemsthat we will relaly have a chance to meet ))) Hope you will have success in everything and we willhave money for tickets and bank account as there must be money on my bank account, not huge but minimum 500 dollars. The visa which i will apply for willbe for 6 months . I want to start it soon relaly )))) I hug you, wait for your news.Will try to callyouin the evening here.
hug you
Letter 30
Hello dearest.
I am writing from phone. again some problems with laptop((
i hooe you feel better. i am happy we are moving forward and soon hope to meet you))) that is my everlasting dream now)) Alstro, i will share all my thoughts and dreams with you. will tell you all you want... Egor's father was born in Russia, but i do not think he supported one of the side more.... he just didnt want to work and ran away from all responsibilities...
Alstro, dearest, i have never had a lavish lifestyle... and i am not expecting that. for me tge moral atmosphere in family is more important... the relations...your attitude to me and egor but not extravagant way of life... you are so wise and you are right about kids...we need to give them education for sure
... as for having more kids..i understand you as well... frankly speaking, may be tgat can sound bad...but for now i do not want at all to have little kids again. I feel really exhausted.... but if i want a kid for sure want a girl)))
as for the flight to Toronto.
so, two variants: 1- we can fly for 1300$ the stop will be in Warsaw and will last for 19 hours.
2-we can fly for 2000$ with rhe stop ahain in Warsaw but for 2 hours.
Egor needs a place already, so that us for two seats.
i as well need to have not leass than 500$ on my bank account. only then they will finish all visa papers.
dearest. i am now with egor in bed...he doesnt want me to leave him. when stand yp will call you)
here vk doesnt work.FB i have. how are yoh named there?
hug you dearest.
soon we will need to decide with bank account and then the rest.
wait for your opunion.
kiass you
Letter 31
Hello dear Alstro.
Forst of all i want to thnak you for being so patient with me, for being so understanding with me, so kind and ofcourse thanks for not judging me.....
Alstro,i will be open with you. I do nto know how you will react, if you continue writing and having a desire to meet me, but i will tell everything to be calm and not to feel afraid of anything....
Yes, i have one more son, Ivan,he was 13 in April. I gave birth to him when was 22, when lived in Luhansk.
His father was a teacher from the university i studied. I was a nice student, he offered to write the work and to continue studying for Doctor's ... i agreed.... later of course when i was thinking much and contemplating about his words and questions...i realized what for he asked about the jobs of my patrents, relatives...he wantedto learn if i have soemone rich in family who has some influence in the town...when he learned that i didnt have..... he used me....
we worked at first well, then one day he invited me to take some papers form his flat, he livednotfar form the university. He told that his wife would give me the papers, i was calm,sure that his wife of course give me everythnig but when i came he was there and not his wife.... i didnt suspevt anything, he invited to drink tea and work at home...i was 21and was so naiive..... so... then he made me to have sex with hhim...... yes, relaly made.....i was shocked, abused, humiliated...... he warned me to keep silence and nto to tellanyone, otherwise i wouldnt finish the university at all..... i stopped working with him of course, finished the university of course but was pregnant..... i cpouldnt go to him and hated even the thought.... but i didnt want to make abortion and kill the innocent, decidedto give birth..... there were many problems with mum... with everyone....but i gave birth....
all was hard....but i had relatives and we coped)))
why i havent told you...... you knowforst of alll, i think that wehn amna knows that i am with two kids, he will try to meet a woman without kid orwith just one....then i didnt want to explain all the situation.... you know may be i got used to the mentality of men here....yes, imade a mistake and didnt tell you....
Ivan is a good football player, he lives not with me as he is in football academy where they live and study..., i see him just once in two weeks.... he is very serious.... as for the pics on the i-net, in Luhansk, i relaly gave my pics to the ownerof the dating agency and they wroteletters for me, and earned money and gave mme 15% from what they earned.... that was for many of course when i tried to get acquainted with some ment myself, all toldabout those pics and of course at once offended me and wrote rude words....
so..... such is my life..... all the time something bad.... and i feel so ashamed to tellall this and cant change this...
what i know is that i have two sons and i need to live for them.... i want to change my life, i cant now have good job because of Egor and in fact here forthosewho are from east there is no good job...andmy profession of teacher is not well-paid,but i am ready to work and help my sons to become real men.
you will ask how i want to leave my country if i have son here. Iwill come for 30-60 days toyou. He will be in academy where he is fed and dressed and where he feels well, and then wewill decide if we move together or not.... Alstro, i am sorry but i was relaly fraid to tell all about me... as there was more badin my life than happy moments....
I will wait for your decision and words(((((
Letter 32
Hello Alstro, dearest.
Thank you for being so kind with me, so understanding.
I gave just my pics to the agency and they were writing letters.
Those were not official agencies, no name , just worked on rented flats. Then i learned they were deceiving me a lot, they earned huge money and they didnt tell me everything..... sorry.... yes, i know now my reputation is bad.... and i cant change that....
all my life was a real struggle.... and now it is the same....
Alstro, you want to save me from all this, but i cant imagine how that will work....
You are such a nice person,man, you deserve all the best.
I wish i could change my situation and really meet you....
Alstro, i feel so ashamed in fact and sorry..... yes, i had to be honest with you fromt he very beginning, but i was afraid that you would be scared of all my situation.... Yes,it is a hard financial situation for me and instead of passport for Egor, i bought football shoes for Ivan as his leg grows now every three months.... he grows quickly and need much now.... and the same for Egor....
Alstro,forgiveme, if you decide to stop our communication, i will really understand though of course will feel such a stupid woman, who has lost realhappines.... I don't want to save you and really I can't save you. It is up to you to save yourself and your children and all I can do is help you a bit. Your name pops up all over on adult sites but I haven't looked. Are there pictures or videos of you as a whore? I don't look because I don't care but what about your sons? What happens when there are no men to scam or you get old and loose your beauty. How will Egor learn to live seeing what you do. What if the war keeps going? You are beautiful but the world is full of beautiful women. Through all your lies I see something special and I think a lot about Egor not having a father and me being able to try and be a better father. I miss my children and the time I didn’t get with them growing up and I dream about a second chance as a father with Egor. It is all about what you really want. If you truly want a second chance at life, then I will help if you do your part. If you visit you have free housing and food is cheap to free so you can stay a long time. I will feed you while you are here. If you like it here you can start the application for immigration. If Ivan is in camp he will be ok there and if you have immigration you can work and make much more money to send him. Jobs are easy to find and pay minimum of $15 an hour. If you stay with me you can save a lot of money to send home. I don't expect any physical attention or sexual favours. You can stay as long as the place is kept clean. I am not home most nights and if I am, I can stay next door. Oh, and the only other condition is you have to feed my fish when I am gone.
Letter 33
Alstro, hello.
I will tell you at once, you can open any site, like you told adult sites...there will be nothing about me.... i have never had sex formoney, had never send any nude pics of me..... ihavent been a whore. I was registered on many dating sites where they wrote for me and used my pics, but no nude pics and no sex...i havent met and had sex with any foreign man. That is why i am not ashamed and my sons wontsee anything bad about me.
Alstro, i am ready to change my life really.
I do nto wanty any dating sites, any letters and pics. want to have father for my sons , good fatrher and thoughtful husband.
Ivan is leaving for Italy on football tournament on the 30th.... that is hard forme even to give him some cash in euro, because i do nto have..... of course i am ready to work and earn but only when egor can go to kindergarten.....
all is hard for me, but thank you for understanding.....
hug you,willw ait for your news,
Letter 34
Alstro, i want to change my life..... but i am afraid you still cant trust in me fullyand that will be between us....
i am not ashamed of my past.... i did nothing except doing those work in agency, that was like a job i was always told.....
i had to feed Ivan, then take care of Egor andIvan...
I feel sorry that my life is not ideal...
i am ready to give allof my heart and soul to the man who will accept me with mypast andi will never betray this man....
tell me if you can close your eyes and help me with the new life....
sorry if i do nto express may be my thoughts well.
Created: 2018-10-08    Last updated: 2018-10-08    Views: 562
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